Why Should I Feel Bad for Being a Jerk?(A Rant)

[Sandernista]

Because it makes you less of a jerk, it makes other people less bitchy to you, and it draws others to you.

Generally being nice begets niceness.

Edited to expand:

For me being an asshole just makes me feel bad, and when I feel bad I'm an asshole.

Just saying. *Shrug*

 

[Krythe]

Because when you troll fat WoW-addicts for being fat, they report you to the escapist mods and you get banned. This is internet-justice.

 

[Emperor Inferno]

Try it and see if you're happier.

You just have your conscience to deal with while you do it though.

This.

the best way to deal with it and still get the popular vote is being as sarcastic/sardonic as you possible can and sprinkle in a snide remark here and there but with a smile and a chuckle

Haha, definitely this. That's what I do. The guys (and girls) at work all love me for exactly this. They see me as a funny crazy guy and love hangin out with me. Hell, that's how my fiance first started liking me.

 

[SturmDolch]

the best way to deal with it and still get the popular vote is being as sarcastic/sardonic as you possible can and sprinkle in a snide remark here and there but with a smile and a chuckle

people are stupid enough to think you are a funny guy and will love you.

it works for me

This a thousand times. People will not only find you funny and love you, they'll think you're intelligent. Just look at Yahtzee and practically 90% of the comedians out there that have built careers on this basic idea.

 

[Nouw]

Karma. 'Nuff said.

Karma indeed. Karma is weird; I always seem to get punished for my wrong doings(which I understand; after all, it's karma) yet I never see that happen to others. For a brief example, I liked the people I sat by in physics, but I talked too much, so the seating got re arranged, and now I don't like where I am sitting. But I understand the balance: I talked to much and disrupted a lesson, and now I have nobody to talk to.

However, the fuck heads on the other side of the room, who are always talking at top volume, and constantly yelling profanities, never get moved around the room. What the fuck?

Try and always do the responsible thing. Stop and think "What is the most mature, responsible way to handle this?" Telling the teacher can be the best thing to do.

 

[Lineoutt]

This is a simple question I hope somebody can answer for me: Why should I feel bad for being a jerk/dick/asshole/douche/etc.

Seriously. I fail to see the incentive to continue tolerating and even being nice to people who genuinely piss me off.

All my life, for as long as I can remember, I have tried to do the right thing, to think before I spoke, to put others feelings before my own. I have tried and tried and tried some more to avoid conflict, to resolve problems, and to give a little in the name of "the greater good". "Be the bigger man" they say, and I do try.

But lately, I don't know why I should. I mean seriously. What incentive is there for me to do good? Why should I go up to the person I don't like and tell them to fuck off? Why shouldn't I beat the shit out of the next piece of shit to chirp me? Why shouldn't I be an asshole?

Don't tell me it isn't effective. I watch assholes succeed around me everyday; they get the girls, they get the trophies, they yell at me and say stuff behind my back. And I just stay quiet, promising myself that some day I will be prosperous and they will be some strung out addict.

When is some day coming? I've been waiting fucking 16 years for "some day". 9/10 times, not being an asshole proves to be equally or less useless than being an asshole, yet that stupid conscious in my head goes "No no no, that's not the right thing to do, don't be like that". I just don't understand it. I know I'm setting myself up for bad situations, or putting my back to a wall, or adding stress to my life, yet I can't seem to stop. It pisses me off to no end.

So I guess my question is "What do I stand to gain from doing the right thing. I mean really, are there any benefits?"

Note: I am sorry if this sounds like regular bitchy teenager stuff, but I am really frustrated.

Hmmm... Well I 100% understand your frustration with all the puberty-influenced chatter that goes on in your head. I am dealing with the exact same thing, well a bit different though (more girl issues). But I think that as great as it looks to be an asshole you really have to look at them, you can't just look at what good shit they get, you gotta look at the bad as well.

They will never be as happy as a nice guy. They may think they have it great but they will never have the sense of fulfillment as a nice person. When someone is treating people badly is a reflection of his/her inner insecurities and any emotional turmoil. They can't be truly happy within themselves and so they take it out on people who are nice/polite.

Sorry if this sounds corny, but its the truth. FYI smart girls notice if a guy's a dickbag and unless they have very low self-esteem, they will turn him down every time.

 

[TheTaco007]

16 years isn't that long to wait for what you're talking about. Try 25.

And physical violence doesn't get you anywhere but in trouble. You can get arrested, sued, or expelled for it.

However, there's nothing stopping you from talking back to people you don't like.
I'm an extremely opinionated person, and if someone's doing something I think is wrong, they're getting an earful. I can't help it. That's who I am. I'm sarcastic, highly vocal, and I'm generally smarter than everyone I meet. That might sound egotistical, but it's usually true, and if someone doesn't like me, or if they've given me good legitimate reasons to dislike them, why the hell would I be nice to them?

 

[Twilight_guy]

You'll be a better person. Also, people will be more apt to actually do nice things for you. Nobody likes to help a jerk.

 

[RatRace123]

Meh, being an asshole solves nothing, chances are the assholes you've run into are just naturally lucky or had everything given to them, meaning they feel they can act like entitled shits.

And you don't want the girls that dig assholes, those chicks aren't much better than the pricks they so longingly pine for.

Just tough it out and be the bigger man, besides how does one go about making themselves an asshole? Do you just suddenly act like a douche to all your friends and family? The way I see it, some people are naturally inclined to be assholes, I don't think you're one of them.

Besides, being an asshole increases your chance of getting shot/stabbed/arrested/posting some idiotic picture on facebook then not getting into college/etc...

 

[ultrachicken]

Every time I've contemplated telling somebody off when they wrong me, I've kept my mouth shut for the same reasons you do. I have invariably later found myself in a situation in which telling that person off would have caused me to be royally screwed.

 

[Enigmatic Master]

It's easy to be a jerk that why most people are but do you every wonder why there is bad tv shows? because the majority of the population are jerks and like bad tv. it HARDER to be nice but more poeple like you in the real world after school and the Nice guys don't get divorce two or three times so you can conform and be a jerk or you can be different and be nice You choose.

 

[Mr Godfrey]

Hm. This is gonna sound bad. Be a Jerk. Try out the lifestyle, it tends to be outrageously successful in high school (at least with girls, at least where I go to high school). Then you get older and hopefully people start to value that "bigger man" stuff, and worthwhile women stop going for total tools. That might be the better time to go for the white knight way. After all, why not play to your own advantage? It isn't 'evil' to play by the rules, but play with the intent of winning.

Or if you wanna brave being the paragon of the schoolyard, know the difference between being a jerk and standing up for yourself. If someone disrespects you purposely, you're not a douche for kicking his ass (although you might get in trouble with the school officials. No respect for human nature). If someone bags on you, then don't let it slide. Make a snide remark. Bite back, and they'll back off. If they don't, bite harder. Otherwise they'll think you're the resident punching bag, and why should you have to be the resident punching bag?

 

[Double A]

Halfway through a semester, something clicks in me. I start being more of an ass in classes I'm usually quiet or nice in. Or if I'm an ass, I'll usually calm down.

I've discovered people like me more when I'm not being a dick.

Of course, the usual reason for me being an ass is because I didn't like the people in the class in the first place.

The lesson here is be an ass to assholes, and be nice to nice people.

 

[McNinja]

This is a simple question I hope somebody can answer for me: Why should I feel bad for being a jerk/dick/asshole/douche/etc.

Seriously. I fail to see the incentive to continue tolerating and even being nice to people who genuinely piss me off.

All my life, for as long as I can remember, I have tried to do the right thing, to think before I spoke, to put others feelings before my own. I have tried and tried and tried some more to avoid conflict, to resolve problems, and to give a little in the name of "the greater good". "Be the bigger man" they say, and I do try.

But lately, I don't know why I should. I mean seriously. What incentive is there for me to do good? Why should I go up to the person I don't like and tell them to fuck off? Why shouldn't I beat the shit out of the next piece of shit to chirp me? Why shouldn't I be an asshole?

Don't tell me it isn't effective. I watch assholes succeed around me everyday; they get the girls, they get the trophies, they yell at me and say stuff behind my back. And I just stay quiet, promising myself that some day I will be prosperous and they will be some strung out addict.

When is some day coming? I've been waiting fucking 16 years for "some day". 9/10 times, not being an asshole proves to be equally or less useless than being an asshole, yet that stupid conscious in my head goes "No no no, that's not the right thing to do, don't be like that". I just don't understand it. I know I'm setting myself up for bad situations, or putting my back to a wall, or adding stress to my life, yet I can't seem to stop. It pisses me off to no end.

So I guess my question is "What do I stand to gain from doing the right thing. I mean really, are there any benefits?"

Note: I am sorry if this sounds like regular bitchy teenager stuff, but I am really frustrated.

It is, and you'll get over it. Just wait until college.

Douchebaggery begets douchebaggery, but at the same time, kindness begets kindness. I've "done the right thing" for 14 years (I started when I was six), and I don't have a regret about it. Why? Because things usually present themselves that I would not have seen otherwise. Most of the time, it's not even about "doing the right thing" or anything like that; it's stepping back, thinking about it, letting things come to you, and reactive in a positive way that won't degrade you as a person.

And if it's adding so much stress, stop being pissed off. Distance yourself from whatever's upsetting you or stressing you out.

As for benefits? Well, not feeling terrible about yourself is one. I suppose another would be having friends who actually like you. Also, people will generally be nicer, and more likely to help you out, as long as you don't take them for granted.

 

[Ghengis John]

Note: I am sorry if this sounds like regular bitchy teenager stuff, but I am really frustrated.

You know you can be a nice guy and not be a push over. My brother's code of conduct is essentially respect everyone but don't take shit from anyone. It works for him, if you can pull it off. Besides, girls who like nice guys are simply a higher caliber than the ones who like jerks. I'm not gonna lie I did get picked on in highschool a couple years, I put up with a lot of shit, but I'm gonna be honest, I had a lot of high quality girls after me who were looking for a nice guy. That kinda made up for the other shit. And in any event, once I showed everyone I was good at football and lost 90 pounds, all the teasing stopped. While I was never the most popular guy around I got to enjoy my last two years of highschool pretty peacefully.

Essentially you can be whoever you want to be in highschool, just don't be weird, fat or wear thick glasses and it helps to be good at a sport.

 

[Housebroken Lunatic]

So I guess my question is "What do I stand to gain from doing the right thing. I mean really, are there any benefits?"

A sense of self-respect?

You can basically tell the rest of the world: "There! You tried to bring me down to your petty and pathetic level, but I didn't give in. I am EVIDENTLY stronger than that."

That's a lot more than what most people can say about themselves without lying...

 

[Mehtevas]

The respect of people who don't genuinely piss you off?