"Why the HELL did I DO that?!"

[SnakeF]

Went on a School trip and 2 of the people I was sharing a room with were practicing martial arts, so I decide to show them street fighting, needless to say, one of them crashed through a window, epic funnehs at first but then the Teachers found out...

 

[walls of cetepedes]

Coward.

Burn £50 to tease a prick.

"Why didn't i just flash it in his face?"

What? £50 notes are pointless. No shops accept them, and I have no idea where to get my hands on one.

 

[Spirultima]

Coward.

Burn £50 to tease a prick.

"Why didn't i just flash it in his face?"

What? £50 notes are pointless. No shops accept them, and I have no idea where to get my hands on one.

I had it in my belongings at home, i had a £5 coin, £5 note, £10 note, £20 and £50 note.

Also i mainly had one to find out who was on it, i think its Newton

 

[FluffX]

Well, I tend to turn the faucet to maximum hot water while I'm doing the dishes and see how long I can hold my hand under it. And just so you know, that's hot enough to cause steam to billow out when it hits the sink. I think my record is 6 seconds, before I lost the ability to move my hand.

Me too! Except I last about 8 seconds. What do I win?

A sore hand.

And this car. *Gestures to a pineapple*

 

[Nigh Invulnerable]

Pulled the cigarette lighter out of a car and touched the lighter end to see if it was really hot and yes, yes it is quite hot.

I did that exact thing, when I was about 6 or 7.

 

[walls of cetepedes]

And recently after a heavy night out drinking agreed to do a 89% proof black absynthe shot...

Absynthe... Daaaamn...

 

[Tears of Blood]

I may sound like a stuck-up tosser for this, but I rarely do things that I later regret. I'm a thinker, a ponderer. I always deeply consider even the simplest things. I go out to Burger King and I have a deep inner discussion with myself about whether I should get a chicken sandwich or go to Arby's or something.

This is one reason I can never get a good grade on the fucking ACT. I get most of the questions right, but I don't even get to the latter portion of each section because I have to qualify why I think each answer is wrong. Ugh.

Anyway, I have done some stupid things that I look back on and facepalm. Most of them invovle subjects I'd rather not speak about, but I can think back to some things I said that just sounded stupid, yet seemed to make sense in my head.

An example of this would be when I was desribing my house to someone. I said it would take me five minutes to get from the back of the basement to my room on the second floor. Obviously, this is a stretch for most any middle-class house. I was really making a joke about my basement being clutered with pointless shit, but didn't really explain that. So, of course, I just made myself sound like a big liar with a cock growing out of my forehead.

 

[Shadowfaze]

i got really drunk and completed bioshock on survivor mode without knowing. i woke up with my telly on and beans on toast all over my lap. then i checked my trophies and was like Wtf? where did that come from??

 

[Anth]

got mad at something i was doing, spun around in exasperation, hit my forearm on a metal pole, and seriously bruised the muscles that control finger contraction. i could only move my thumb for about a week.

 

[hotacidbath]

Just yesterday at work I was walking through a bunch of blackberries whose thorns kept catching my pants and digging into my legs so I stopped for a minute to hop up on a log and get out of them. When I got off the log I thought it would be a good idea to jump off. Cue me falling ass backwards into a pile of blackberries with only a backpack to protect me. I ended up with my feet above my head, a bramble attached to my face and a giant blackberry stain on my pants.

 

[TheZapper]

In science class I set my tie on fire with a bunsen burner once. Then I tried to pull it off and burnt my hand. Then I tried to lean over the sink and soak my tie but I banged my head against the tap. Not my proudest moment.

 

[Ex_ery]

I used ambien (Sleep medication) a little late one evening and had to be up early for work (about 4-5 hours of sleep)... In my zombie state of the morning I got to work, was mulling through the morning just fine when i came to my senses not realizing HOW i got to work...WHEN...and then i noticed a very painful sensation on my arm with a distinct hole pattern.

Apparently In order to save time getting ready I ironed out a wrinkle on my dress shirt while still wearing it.

Never taken ambien without a full 8 hours to devote to sleep since.

 

[magnuslion]

I thought something similar, with many cuss words sprinkled in, when I epically failed my dexterity check for car surfing on my friends Geo storm. got dragged three blocks and finally, finally had the common sense to LET Go of the the damn door.

not one of my better moments.

 

[The Riff]

Sitting on the trunk of my friends car while he was driving, on the highway, at 3 AM

2 Swedish people did that... but replace trunk with hood and sitting with standing... They died.

 

[Goldeneye103X2]

I once called this guy a prick because i had a bad day.

Let's see, he stamped on my head whilst i was down, and beat me shitless.

ouch.

Also, attempting parkour on a wet day. One big bruise covering the whole forehead coming up.

Luckily though, it came in useful when i was playing caliban in my school play of the tempest.

 

[Valkyira]

how much would duct tape hurt if it was applied to my leg and ripped off...
it hurts, it hurts a lot.

Thats just manly waxing haha. Its ok if you want smoother legs

 

[Agent Larkin]

Shooting a kid on a moped with my pellet gun.
Long story short I wound up in a ditch with just my pellet gun 2 and a half miles away from were I live trying to hide before I head home. This is Act 1 of my guerilla war against a gang of kids in my area who have mopeds.

Do you have any artillery support? Air support? Explosives? You gotta have explosives. Can't have a guerrilla war without explosives, mate.

Wire their mopeds with explosives. They go out on 'em. Watch 'em through binoculars. Make sure you have a remote detonator. Watch them. Press the button. Boom.

Actually I just set them on fire with a can of petrol.

 

[BoxCutter]

Sitting on the trunk of my friends car while he was driving, on the highway, at 3 AM

2 Swedish people did that... but replace trunk with hood and sitting with standing... They died.

I would say thats the dumbest thing i've ever heard but i've car surfed before too.

Its amazing im not dead really

 

[Cuniculus]

I once got mad and punched someone in the mouth for being a complete retard. Immediately after, and before the counter attack that caused my nose to bleed, I thought, "I shouldn't have done that."

 

[Daedalus1942]

So yeah, have you ever found yourself saying/thinking this? It just happened to me.

Basically, I've developed a tradition of feeling the hob on top of the oven to see how hot it is after dinner.

Answer for today: "... Owhellowgodowargh!"

And afterwards, looking at it: "I wonder if it's cooled- NO! That would be STUPID!".

And thus I refer you back to the first sentence.

... You actually say Oh hell god of war?

Try again. "... Ow hell ow god ow argh!"

Ah, rightio. Lawl.