Would you give up your name?
- Thread starter Colour Scientist
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Because you're not clinging to archaic and sexist rituals with no modern relevance?Helmholtz Watson said:
Errr...Hypothetically of course.
Or you can just let the kid have a hyphenated name, something which doesn't seem to hurt any of the hetero couples who have been doing it for the last 40+ years.Kendarik said:
Gender roles are social. Biology is biological.Regnes said:
When you say it is a "biological gender role," you are contradicting yourself.
It's also not indisputable. Saying there's no dispute is no different from me saying that I am the Queen of the Americas.
Captcha: Double Cross. Should have been Double X
I'm a guy and despite finding my last name a pain in the butt (no-one can pronounce or spell it correctly first time round), I wouldn't be willing to give it up partly because I'm the only male left in the family with it and partly because I want my kids to suffer the same annoyances that I've had to all these years *evil laugh* To save confusion, especially when it comes to what surname do the kids get, I would be happy with hyphenate it with my hypothetical wife's name if she didn't want to give hers up.
Male here. Not opposed to changing my name. It has a lot to do with it being Ferenczy (making it nigh unrecognizable to most Americans) and my significant other's surname isn't unrecognizable. Also because my SO and I have had a good history of being able to work everything out.
I'm not particularly attached to my name and I don't plan on having kids so it's all a bit of a non-issue for me. Hell, I'd change my first name without much of a problem to be honest. I don't feel like I *am* my name, if that makes sense. Actually, thinking about it it's pretty unusual for me to hear someone addressed by their actual name by a close friend or partner. My boyfriend and I hardly ever use each other's names.
As a feminist, I can't help but feel I wouldn't want to change my surname just out of tradition though, but then again I'm not sure I feel any need to get married either. If I did get married and I genuinely preferred my partner (male or female)'s name to mine I'd probably consider changing it. There are some pretty awesome surnames out there
I quite like the Icelandic system of patronymic naming, ideally altered to include matronymic naming more though. Maybe using patronymic names for boys and matronymic names for girls. Or something.
As a feminist, I can't help but feel I wouldn't want to change my surname just out of tradition though, but then again I'm not sure I feel any need to get married either. If I did get married and I genuinely preferred my partner (male or female)'s name to mine I'd probably consider changing it. There are some pretty awesome surnames out there
I quite like the Icelandic system of patronymic naming, ideally altered to include matronymic naming more though. Maybe using patronymic names for boys and matronymic names for girls. Or something.
Well, if and when that time comes, its ultimately up to her. Its her name after all, right? It should be her choice whether or not she takes my name, keeps her own, or has both. After all, you see spouses have 'Surname-Surname'. So, if she wanted, she could have both.
As for me, personally, I'd rather keep my own surname. Mainly because its another connection to my parents, who I'm very close to. What can I say, I love em, and even that small, tangible connection is kind of nice. So, I'd understand if she felt the same way.
As for me, personally, I'd rather keep my own surname. Mainly because its another connection to my parents, who I'm very close to. What can I say, I love em, and even that small, tangible connection is kind of nice. So, I'd understand if she felt the same way.
No more than she is by expecting me to buy a wedding ring three times beyond my paycheck.Zachary Amaranth said:
Considering the headache that happened the last time I changed my name (for completely different reasons mind you), I'm not really sure I'd want to do that again any time soon.
But practical issues aside I don't really care, even considering I'm basically the last member of my family on my father's side. And it's looking unlikely I'll have kids, so... When I die, that's the end of the family, basically.
No pressure. XD
But practical issues aside I don't really care, even considering I'm basically the last member of my family on my father's side. And it's looking unlikely I'll have kids, so... When I die, that's the end of the family, basically.
No pressure. XD
I'm gay, so I can't go with the traditional option of having the woman take the last name of the husband anyway. I would probably take my husband's name if he wanted, I don't like mine that much. I don't really care as long as his name isn't awful XD.
Though I don't plan on getting married anyway.
Though I don't plan on getting married anyway.
I do not care since if I loved them I would let them choose. But I do have to say it may make her parents happy, that she keeps it so that is a plus. Then again we could start a new family tradition were we both take each other surnames.
I wouldn't. I have an attachment to it, even though/partly because it drew a tide of smartass remarks in high school.
Oddly enough this is a subject I'm a traditionalist on. I pondered why this is where I draw the line, cuz I'm supportive of non traditional marriage. But I just think it is proper for my wife to take my name. Plus it's an awesome name Jones. I wouldn't give up my name EVER. And I suppose if my wife didnt want to I would have to think and talk about it if I can accept that. Don't know why I think this way, but I do. And if I spend the time to find the right wife, she would want to take my name.
It's weird, I feel exactly the same way. I was actually kind of surprised when I read all of the posts on here, but I guess I'm in the minority here. I'm traditionalist as well (which is weird because I'm not usually sentimental or traditional at all about most things). But it's my name, and like you said, it just seems...proper to have your wife take it. I dunno. I guess in theory it's not a big deal, it's just a little character quirk I guess I have. Maybe because I still see marriage as a big commitment (I would be absolutely certain I wanted to spend the rest of my life with somebody...I don't want to become another divorce statistic), and the name changing goes along with all that...but I understand why other people wouldn't be so keen on it I suppose...hm...Roroshi14 said:
I have daddy issues, so I wouldn't mind giving up my last name, as long as my wife's last name is cool. If her name's Berklestein or something then I'll probably have to stick with Scott. As for what she does I don't care much, it's her name, is she wants to keep it, fine. It's her decision, y'know?
Schmidt isn't really the last name of the kings (oh wait, yes it is). I would give it up, but I'm the man, so that doesn't really fall on me in the tradition way.
Mmmm...More stereotypes. Awesome. I love how you already show contempt for your potential wife.Helmholtz Watson said: