Write your own epitath

[Duck Sandwich]

"He is not here. He hid himself to repair himself."

"Don't you have better things to do than reading the epitaphs of random schmucks?"

"My epitaph is cooler than yours."

"I'll be seeing you REAL soon."

"April Fools Day!"

"Well this sucks."

 

[xMacx]

Here lies Joe Blancato ... and why not?

(Free get-out-of-a-one-day-ban-free card to the first person to PM me what I'm referencing.)

PM'd.

Also, just in case.

 

[Voodoo Child]

"I've got to be direct. If I'm wrong, please correct. You're standing on my neck."

Sorry.

"My milkshakes brought killer bees to the yard."

 

[needsmosleep]

"So I guess that part wasnt optional"

 

[The Sorrow]

"Don't mess with sodium."

 

[Abbadiel]

"Incredibly Horny Right Now"

 

[The Franco]

In the few moments of contemplation I had, I came up with a few of these:

"Wait, you're reading this?"

"Come down and see me some time"

"You wont believe how cramped it is in here"

"Wish one of you fuckers would have warned me about that truck"

"Hopes to beat Samuel Taylor Coleridge at Scrabble someday"

"Bad thing about that trick, I can only do it once"

"Fuck you Blizzard, I'm free now!"

"So maybe I can't fly..."

"He lived, he loved, he was a nerd."

 

[JC123]

The worst one I've ever thought of...

"Delete my porn."

 

[stompy]

"If you're here, at least I wasn't forgotten..."

 

[Fire Daemon]

Don't worry guys, I'll respawn soon.

But seeing as how I plan to be stuffed, mounted and placed in a Mac Donalds I don't think words are needed.

 

[000Ronald]

"Ha, ha!

The last laugh.

I apologies to anyone who enjoys Non-sequir.

 

[Hey Joe]

"Don't drink ethanol"

or

"Dancin' it up with Zombie Jesus!"

 

[AngryMan]

"Beloved Father, 1988-2018

Beloved Mother, 2018-2024

Beloved Father Again, 2024-2050"

/win

 

[PurpleRain]

The worst one I've ever thought of...

"Delete my porn."

I'd actually like that more if it said "Don't delete my porn!"

Anywho:

"Here lies Purple Rain. If not, please contact the undertaker."
"Purple Rain. Couldn't dodge a bullet after all."
"Don't turn around..."
"Go read a book!"
"You're dead to me!"

 

[Meliz]

me: "oh my god an epitah contest! Quick! I need something moving i can put on my headstone!"
my brother, deadpan: "... a slug?"

 

[Yan-Yan]

"I don't have to be warm, just gotta be stiff"

"Rigor Mortis: The Anti-ED"

"Just because I'm stone cold, doesn't mean I'm not hot in the sack"

"If you're wondering what happens in the next life: I know"

"First one to bring me back finds out where I buried my belongings"

EDIT:

And probably various inappropriate pictures using the E-Crypt [http://www.reuters.com/article/latestCrisis/idUST73748] tool, who's price should drop about the time I do.

 

[propertyofcobra]

"I used to say,
"When my life is happy I work and smile and think,
When times are full of worry I frown and cry and drink",
Now when my life is over, my times have come to pass,
I have been buried upside down, so the world may kiss my ass!" (Yeah, it's old and I butchered it. So what, you gonna sue?)

"Here lies PropertyofCobra. Born 1988, Died 20XX, Risen again right behind you"

"Hey, pastor, you were wrong! This isn't heaven! It's cold and maggots are eating me!"

"Please don't touch the lightning rod. I need it to rise to my unholy semblance of life"

"Put your ear to the ground, you can still feel my heart beating"

And my favorite

"OH GOD GET ME OUT! CALL THE UNDERTAKER! I AM TRAPPED!"

 

[moretimethansense]

"I left this world the same way I came in to it: naked screaming and covered in blood!"

 

[Jeroen Stout]

"Ask me about worms!"