Oh LORD I know. I revisit FG every few years. I think "This time I'm going to finish you, Fantasy General". And every time I do really well. Really, really well. And I think "this isn't so bad...clearly I've matured to the point where the challenges of Fantasy General are no longer a match for my vast experience as a gamer". Then I reach a certain point and it's "Oh...right. Fuck you, Fantasy General!".
I strongly recommend you look into an obscure series of games called "Elven Legacy". The story line is atrocious (but easily ignored), but in all other ways it basically IS Fantasy General. Not an homage. Not a "similar to" type of situation. It's basically the same bloody game in a slightly different setting. And it's just as ball crushingly difficult. But with a graphical update!
PS - You might want to try the 1.13 mod for JA2 as well, there's some cruel difficulty options in there for a game that was already punishing.