You have one free punch.

[WaysideMaze]

I would carry it around on a necklace and use it to threaten folks that were bothering me. "See this? Keep it up, and it's yours." A punch is waaaaaay more useful before it's thrown.

Reminds me of the slap bet on how I met your mother, and how it's the anticipation of the slap that terrifies Barney more than the slap itself.

 

[Idlemessiah]

David Cameron. Also, I punch with hammers.

 

[Ljs1121]

Wow, I just sat here for a while until I realised I really don't wanna punch anybody.
Maybe I'm just a peace-loving-wuss, but I can't say I have a desire to actually hit anybody.

But, that's not a funny answer, so:
You.
Yes, you.

Me? D:

Anyways, mine would probably be on somebody that I know. He's a massive douchebag who constantly uses memes such as "cool story, bro" and "umad?" far beyond the point of funniness. He also started a rumor that I was gay because my voice sounds funny. I typically try not to hold grudges, but he is my number one exception.

 

[Kerboom]

I can't believe nobody has said this so far.

Justin Bieber.

Also, my punching hand is out of order, so can I have a kick with steel-capped boots?

 

[DoPo]

Well, I have somebody in mind. Somebody from these very forums. This user [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/profiles/view]. I'm coming for you, do you hear me, you cannot hide!

 

[Scarim Coral]

Either one of these three people-

Yamino from Deviantart.
G-Man (NOT Half Life) or Babs from Comicvine.

Before you asked why, I have a petty personal grude against them.

 

[Aurora Firestorm]

I could name a couple candidates. I don't normally want to punch people, but once in a while, someone makes it onto that list. It's less about vengeance than about "this person needs a lesson in proper humanity."

 

[Gabanuka]

I'm gonna say someone who's fictional

Iago the villain in Othello, I have never hated a fictional character so much.

 

[kzeelio]

pope benedict XVI

you have no idea how much i'd relish that opertunity, or if a second punch was added ann widicome.

And a second punch for the Pope from me. It would make me pretty damn happy.

 

[FoolKiller]

Well, I have somebody in mind. Somebody from these very forums. This user [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/profiles/view]. I'm coming for you, do you hear me, you cannot hide!

That's quite cute. But there is a reason the punch is free. Others will know what you did and will come for you... in 15 years when you aren't even expecting it. Maybe when you're about to get married, maybe when you're at your son's graduation... You never know.

Cheers friend.

captcha: anchors away

Yep. That's what it feels like if I hit someone.

Oh... and I choose to hit EA. Yes.... I'll hit so hard the entire organization will feel it.

 

[Fractral]

Most of the people who come to mind immediately are people who are personal aquaintances who have wronged me in the past and as such mentioning them will have no effect on anyone here.
But yeah, probaby Justin Bieber. Maybe I can try and aim for his vocal chords, stop him from ever singing again.

 

[David Bjur]

Wow, I just sat here for a while until I realised I really don't wanna punch anybody.
Maybe I'm just a peace-loving-wuss, but I can't say I have a desire to actually hit anybody.

But, that's not a funny answer, so:
You.
Yes, you.

A jew? But that's anti-semitic! I've lost my faith in you Phasmal

OT: I don't really want to hit anyone, but if I had to then probably Anders Breivik, I would love to see the look on his face.

 

[Arashiofordo3]

Free punch, huh?

-drinks free punch-

Very nice, thanks for the punch!

 

[farscythe]

boris johnson...because whatever his reaction to it will be...it will likely make my day

 

[LordFish]

Cher LLoyed (I refuse to google that woman's name to find out if I've spelt it correctly)

B*tch just does my head in, and she's ruining the music industry.

 

[Sixcess]

Ron Rosenberg of Crystal Dynamics.

Although not so much a punch as a firm smack on the nose with a rolled up newspaper accompanied by a firm "No!" whilst pointing at his E3 interviews.

 

[Terminate421]

My old middle school bully.

I won't say his name.

Either that or Jack Thompson, considering how he can't sue.

 

[Guffe]

Wow, I just sat here for a while until I realised I really don't wanna punch anybody.
Maybe I'm just a peace-loving-wuss, but I can't say I have a desire to actually hit anybody.

But, that's not a funny answer, so:
You.
Yes, you.

Ninjad in the two ways I was going to answer -.-
"You sir over there"
*Phasmal turns around*
*BAAM