You have one wish!

[ThePS1Fan]

A Sonic Screwdriver. It's a pocket sized Deus ex Machina that you just point at any problem until it goes away. Plus it makes a cool sound.

 

[Right Hook]

Omnipotence. No need for wishes then.

Everything's boring when you're omnipotent.

OT: Easy. The written word gives me power. I am the writer. I drive the plot of the world forward.

You can use your powers to shut off other sections of your power. Omnipotence always wins, always.

No, and don't argue. I used a discussion just like this to get high grade in Rationalism. Omnipotence either IS or it isn't. You don't halfway that shit ever.

I'd like to hear your explanation, although I understand if you don't feel like writing it out. I personally don't feel like arguing the point myself but in a basic sense from my perspective, if you are capable of literally everything than you should also be capable of shutting yourself off from as much as you want. Not being able to do so would mean you weren't in fact omnipotent.

 

[EHKOS]

I wish to know what happens after death and if God exists or not.

 

[Drakmorg]

If I'm feeling boring, infinite money.
If I'm not boring, chainsaw car. Wait, no, I can just hire engineers to design and build a chainsaw car for me if I'm rich.
I've got it! Robot best friend! Wait, no, money can buy that too. Dammit!
Oh, now I've got it! Cat-girls. That works. I'll take that one please. I expect it in the mail soon Internet Fairy. Chop Chop!

 

[Rack]

Time control. I could help get the world out of its major problems and get some extra longevity without the curse of immortality.

 

[rednose1]

Been said before, but I'd wish for 100 Genie lamps. If that doesn't work, I figure teleporation would be the next choice. Screw mind powers, that will be of little use when I teleport you TO THE MOON!

Hope your mind powers can turn moon dust into oxygen, otherwise your trip is gonna SUCK!

 

[FalloutJack]

-You asked for it-

I took alot of philosophy in college, so...this may hurt.

When I was writing the paper for Rationalism, it represented most of my grade, a very different approach from the usual grading in other courses that I'd taken, even of the same subject. I had to do something that I could keep as an interesting and thought-provoking for pages on end, because this was no regular professor. They had effectively imported him from Germany as a visitor to the area for like...one semester, and then he was gone in a flash! Thus, I came upon the topic of rationally deconstructing god's omnipotence and status as a being of good and evil, despite religious claims that god is only good. An actual discussion of this would belong in Religion and Politics, but satisfying curiosity is hardly out of line, so...

Obviously, I'm not gonna quote the entire damn thing verbatim. What followed in the paper was an establishment of god existence as per rationalism (Easy, since Descarte and plenty of others had thought about this already.), and then went on the properly define omnipotence as all-powerful without fail. It's what we coined the term for, and he's the one we established it to. The all-powerful and all-knowing god, creator of all, etc. It was by this method that I proved that this also meant that god was capable of great evil along with great good by definition alone, if not also for the fact that evil exists and everything originally came from him, SO...there you have THAT. Everyone's definition of evil exists, else we wouldn't be defining them, and even in metacognative, forward-thinking, introspective analysis of the end result of all things we still must conclude he has some asshole moments IF he was indeed omnipotent.

That was where my paper led me, and then I made the incredible discovery that god's infinite power must contain every choice, bad or good, even against paradoxes and impossibilities because it couldn't possibly switch off. How do you put Everything into a box marked Everything, which includes the box you just put Everything in? I determined that the reason things are the way they are and not giant perfection was because - religiously speaking - god's power is always on and never able to un-god, so he has to have the omniscience to look after all that he's done every microsecond, some of which may have been the worst atrocities ever conceived by man, IF we follow that line of thinking.

That's why I believe omnipotence is no fun. You become Sim Universe forever and don't have time for much else.

 

[Cyfu]

Unsure between three options.

Rubber abilities, controlling time, or... a Bayleef!

rubber abilities? Are you a One Piece fan by any chance?

Omnipotence. No need for wishes then.

Everything's boring when you're omnipotent.

OT: Easy. The written word gives me power. I am the writer. I drive the plot of the world forward.

This. the last time I was asked a question like this I thought about maybe a amulet(or something like that) that when I wore it every wish would come true, but what I write is a lot better.

captcha: burger with fries. You know if I had that power right now that would probably be one of the first things i would wish for.

 

[Vanitas likes Bubbles]

To be able to bend the universe into whatever I can think of at my will.

 

[Rowan93]

Well, the first thing I'd do is ask the internet fairy some questions, each one phrased more as a command in the vein of "if and only if it would not constitute a wish, please clarify this/explain that/tell me whether the wish can affect this" so that I don't accidentally use up a wish just by asking questions.

Now, what I wish for is going to be affected a lot by finding out the limits, restrictions, and lacks of restrictions affecting it, but rather than explain my decision-making process I'll just list a few possible wishes.

If the wish is pretty limited in some way or other:

- My wallet spawns a note of whatever denomination and currency I visualise whenever I open it. Yeah this is the boring wish.

- Human Mane Six appear, as I imagine them. Just in case I accidentally imagine the wrong versions; no black twilight, none of them are fat, they don't have any nonhuman features, no not even horns or wings, and FFS they'd better have clothes on!

- Weather control, to within the variance of how wrong the weather forecast actually tends to be. So like, if the weather forecast says "cloudy with some sunshine", I can make it a bit rainy, or I can make it really sunny, but I can't make a hurricane happen.

- Immortality where I don't get physically older, or mentally older in ways that are damaging (e.g. Alzheimer's) from my 21st birthday onwards, and I recover from any injuries that don't severely damage my brain.

- A nanotechnological fab lab that looks outwardly like a 3d printer except it's so advanced it can use the molecules in the air as raw materials and it can print edible food. It comes with the software for making designs, along with the hardware for connecting it to my computer and powering it up. Somehow both are compatible with my computer, and are massively user-friendly.

If I can violate the laws of physics like , and/or don't have to care about making the news:

- A Cybran ACU from Supreme Commander, which is biometrically locked to me, can be programmed with the designs for more things than just the tech tree from the game, and comes with the manual(s) necessary to learn how to introduce these new designs. Also comes with a rope ladder so that the cockpit is accessible when it pops into existence in a field without me needing a crane.

- Nearly-fully-functional TARDIS, with a robot crew that answers to me. More specifically, the TARDIS should be less broken than The Doctor's one, but it's okay if it still looks permanently like a blue box on the outside; and the robot crew know how to operate a TARDIS as well as an average crew of time lords, and inexplicably like/love me in a non-clingy, non-jealous, non-sexual way.

- Power to hop into an alternate universe where humanity never evolved / rule 63 Earth / Equestria
- Power to hop into whatever alternate universe I want
- Power to fly
- Power to stop time
- Power to shoot fireballs/icicles/MREs

- A box of magic rings that give me different powers, i.e. the ones above

Now, as I've more or less just shown, you can make several wishes in one wish, or you can divide some wishes into separate ones, so there's another variable of how much I can combine wishes together. If the rules are really lax on combos, then I'll wish for:

- A great big adventure to happen, with me as the (or one of the) main protagonist(s).
(I'd specify a whoooole lot more about it than just that one sentence, but a) If I wrote it out it would be several pages of wish-fulfilment self-insert-fic where the characters that aren't me aren't even given specific names, and b) It would vary quite a bit depending on some more properties of the wish)

combined with

- When I wake up the morning after making the wish, I remember nothing about making a wish, and any memory of previous times I've thought of this particular wish gets a lot hazier so that at no point in the adventure do things go *click* and then "holy shit I wished for this!"

That second one is important because otherwise when people die in the course of the awesome adventure, I'll angst about how it's totally my fault because actually, yeah it is and I basically wished them dead. Also, any love interests would only exist because I wished them real. So, unless I could pack in the memory loss as a combo meal, I'm not going to make the adventure wish, although it is the one I'd prefer otherwise (partly because it'd also include getting superpowers and stuff in the course of the story - you could split the wish into dozens of different ones if you felt vindictive).

 

[GundamSentinel]

The power over all dimensions, matter and energy. That way I can grant any other wish I might have myself. Think big!

 

[Wolf In A Bear Suit]

The ability to fly

 

[Rowan93]

-You asked for it-

I took alot of philosophy in college, so...this may hurt.

When I was writing the paper for Rationalism, it represented most of my grade, a very different approach from the usual grading in other courses that I'd taken, even of the same subject. I had to do something that I could keep as an interesting and thought-provoking for pages on end, because this was no regular professor. They had effectively imported him from Germany as a visitor to the area for like...one semester, and then he was gone in a flash! Thus, I came upon the topic of rationally deconstructing god's omnipotence and status as a being of good and evil, despite religious claims that god is only good. An actual discussion of this would belong in Religion and Politics, but satisfying curiosity is hardly out of line, so...

Obviously, I'm not gonna quote the entire damn thing verbatim. What followed in the paper was an establishment of god existence as per rationalism (Easy, since Descarte and plenty of others had thought about this already.), and then went on the properly define omnipotence as all-powerful without fail. It's what we coined the term for, and he's the one we established it to. The all-powerful and all-knowing god, creator of all, etc. It was by this method that I proved that this also meant that god was capable of great evil along with great good by definition alone, if not also for the fact that evil exists and everything originally came from him, SO...there you have THAT. Everyone's definition of evil exists, else we wouldn't be defining them, and even in metacognative, forward-thinking, introspective analysis of the end result of all things we still must conclude he has some asshole moments IF he was indeed omnipotent.

That was where my paper led me, and then I made the incredible discovery that god's infinite power must contain every choice, bad or good, even against paradoxes and impossibilities because it couldn't possibly switch off. How do you put Everything into a box marked Everything, which includes the box you just put Everything in? I determined that the reason things are the way they are and not giant perfection was because - religiously speaking - god's power is always on and never able to un-god, so he has to have the omniscience to look after all that he's done every microsecond, some of which may have been the worst atrocities ever conceived by man, IF we follow that line of thinking.

That's why I believe omnipotence is no fun. You become Sim Universe forever and don't have time for much else.

I don't see why you needed to say any more there than just "Omnipotence is being all-powerful without fail". Someone could easily argue about that definition, although I'm not going to because I'd rather just make that word go away, and use a different word or phrase that means what Shotgun Guy meant when he said "omnipotence", to differentiate it from what you mean when you say "omnipotence".

Is that actually a thing he can do or not? It seems like your point is a definition thing but I might have just misinterpreted it.

Now, my problem with getting omnipotence is a more basic one: "shutting off your powers" will either mean limiting them to the point that you'll screw up and get killed, or it'll mean having them still accessible enough that it's like playing life with cheat codes on and everything feels empty, and not only is there no "sweet spot" between those but there's a pretty big intersection where it feels empty and pointless but you're still probably going to get injured or killed if and when you fuck something up.

 

[Froggy Slayer]

I wish for unlimited wish-granting faeries,

 

[Ix Rebound]

Every living thing in the universe, including me, dead.

ummm.. ...why?

 

[Xaio30]

Feeling happy until I am dead. Preferably afterwards too if there's some sort of afterlife.

 

[Bassik]

Mentallic powers, the ability to influence and read the emotions and thoughts of others.
I could rule the world with that. People would vote me in power, armies would despair and flee before any shots are fired, and I can turn my greatest enemies into my closest allies with little effort.