You know you're an idiot when...................

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Elemorea

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Feb 20, 2009
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OK so I just did something incredibly stupid. I was cutting into a chocolate cake and saw that there was some icing on the knife. Not wanting to let it go to waste I immediately licked the knife. However I failed to remember that a knife is a sharp object and cut a neat line in the middle of my tongue.

So Escapists, what stupid/forgetful things have you done to yourself???
 

Legend of J

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Feb 28, 2010
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I once answered my phone while drivin a tractor and drove it straight into the fence. Thankfully i managed to stand up the fence and make it look like it haden't fell down till 3 weeks later when we moved the sheep and they got out.
 

Tartarga

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Jun 4, 2008
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A while back I was sitting in my car for like half an hour and out of sheer boredom touched the cigarette lighter thingy while it was hot. Appearently when I went to grab it I pushed it in without noticing causing it to get extremly hot, I then touched it and burned my finger. Hurt like hell.
 

Still Life

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Sep 22, 2010
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You know you're an idiot when... You attempt to put a box of cereal in your fridge, like me.
 

Banana Phone Man

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May 19, 2009
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When I'm tired and just wake up I always do something stupid. I remember one I actually did recently which was pour orange juice on my corn flakes and milk in the cup. When I took the first bite I just looked at it and just thought to my self "I am such a dumb dumb"
 

Trivun

Stabat mater dolorosa
Dec 13, 2008
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Elemorea said:
OK so I just did something incredibly stupid. I was cutting into a chocolate cake and saw that there was some icing on the knife. Not wanting to let it go to waste I immediately licked the knife. However I failed to remember that a knife is a sharp object and cut a neat line in the middle of my tongue.

So Escapists, what stupid/forgetful things have you done to yourself???
Ahhh, you actually made me physically wince and cringe when I read that. I never cringe about anything, but that is just really bad, it's like imagining stuff being done to your eyes :(. Weird thing is I write about this, I love stuff like torture when I'm writing fiction, but imagining it actually happening to someone in real life? (shudders)

Anyway, I've got very few stories like this, but when I was a toddler I somehow managed to cut myself with my dad's razor when playing in the bathroom. When my mum found me crying and everything she took me to hospital, covered in blood - when I was all cleaned up they found it was barely a scratch. I didn't even need stitches or anything, just a sticking plaster... :p
 

reg42

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Mar 18, 2009
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... you bring 300 bucks to the beach and forget it's in your pocket. I can't say that was my brightest moment.
 

vanthebaron

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Sep 16, 2010
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You know you're an idiot when....you listen to fox news, trust a politician to do anything for the people instead of the corporate pigs that bought them on the day they announced they were running for office, or trust a fellow human to not mindlessly follow what ever the political news broadcasters tell them to do.

yes i know this is extreamly pesimestic.
 

the-kitchen-slayer

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Apr 16, 2008
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My biggest dumb-dumb thing i did was last night: I let myself get distracted till 2 AM talking with people, reading stuff, etc, crawled into bed... And tossed and turned for 45 minutes, get up, stayed up till 5 in the bloody morning cuse i wasn't tired...

And i have an interview in 3 hours, 45 minutes. It's now 10:15 am. Good lord i hate being insomniac at times -_-
 

drbarno

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Nov 18, 2009
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going to place a plate after a meal away and end up in the bathroom, still holding the empty plate.
 

Girl With One Eye

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Jun 2, 2010
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OWWWW OP!! :( My tongue feels funny now!

You know you're an idiot when you nearly burn your house down by forgetting that you were boiling corn and leave it for an hour.
 

Imp Poster

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Sep 16, 2010
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In the junior high during recess, I started to tease a group of girls till they couldn't take it anymore. As soon as they got up, I turned around and ran full blast into a tree, unconscious.
 

Vilcus

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Jun 29, 2009
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I went out to the 7-11 one day to buy some random junk food. I got back home from my trip wielding a Double Gulp, a bag of doritos, and an Oh Henry bar. I put the Double Gulp, and the Doritos on the table, and proceed to unwrap the Oh Henry. I walk over to the garbage can to throw the wrapper out, but instead I throw the bar into the garbage, and stick the wrapper in my mouth. Words cannot describe how stupid I felt that day.
 

Jaranja

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Jul 16, 2009
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Jedamethis said:
Polaris19 said:
Putting milk away in the cupboard and cereal in the fridge.


Don't ask -_-
Oh, everybody does that. Like me.
Not as bad as scraping the leftovers off a plate into a bin, then throwing the cutlery in there too.
 

Jedamethis

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Jul 24, 2009
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Jaranja said:
Jedamethis said:
Polaris19 said:
Putting milk away in the cupboard and cereal in the fridge.


Don't ask -_-
Oh, everybody does that. Like me.
Not as bad as scraping the leftovers off a plate into a bin, then throwing the cutlery in there too.
I've almost done that many times, but always manage to stop myself.
 

Willsor

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Jun 20, 2010
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When I decided in my infinite wisdom to walk with my feet in parallel across the bars of a cattle grid. needless to say I fell knee deep into it.
 

Serenegoose

Faerie girl in hiding
Mar 17, 2009
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my biggest 'stupid thing to do' was when I was still at school - we were doing woodwork, and the teacher was all 'so this chisel is sharp, don't touch the edge of it, it'll cut you'

I was having none of that. Looked blunt to me!

So, I ran my thumb along the edge of the chisel and slice! The sharpest pain I have EVER felt ran all the way down the length of my arm (and I've had my share of accidents). It bled profusely. I felt like a total moron. I can still feel that pain now, and it happened more than 10 years ago, it was so vivid.