YOU NEED TO GROW UP!

[Julius Terrell]

With me being 35, I grew up when video games were really just coming in the eye of society. My grandmother bought tons of games for me and my brothers. It was the thing to do. Now I try to talk to people about video games now-a-days, and they give me the strangest of looks. I was even told by one douche bag that adults don't play dance games. I have to look this kind of prejudice in the eye for the most part. I've never really had anyone tell me that what I do is outright childish, but their reactions say otherwise.

I try to talk to people whenever I go to any arcades. It's hard but I try. I love EVERYTHING that american society hates in so many words. I'm a hardcore gamer,Otaku, and a lover of classical music and electronic music. I hate team sports and I HATE pop anything. I've always been a mature individual, but to have every last thing I like belittled by society just hurts, but I want to be social. I don't want to hide in the closet like some scared person. Hell, I'm very athletic, but nobdy wants to hear about running so I'm screwed no matter what.

I'm going to try to enjoy life no matter what people think. You only have one life to live. It's tough because we exist in changing times where the very defenitions of what it means to be an adult is changing. I as long you work and take care of yourself, and have a roof over your head and food to eat, what does it matter what you do with your free time?

Try being an adult trying to talk to people about japanese anime? It's difficult with some people.

 

[an annoyed writer]

no, you dont get to do what you want. if you want to do what you want go live in an anarchy. if you dont like that then follow the rules and get rid of the SUV thats killing nature and stop bothering everyone with your sound system (neons do no damage, except if you break them so keep them). having a hobby is not the same as "fuck everyone i do what i want". you shoudl go live on a moon, becasue as long as you live on earth you should not be allowed to destroy it.

I'm not sure if I'm reading something by a person who is joking, or someone who is genuinely pissed at my loud and proud approach to life. If the first one is true, I commend your attempt at satire, but if you're dead serious I'll have you know my truck is a newer, more fuel-efficient model with an engine that just passed the US's emissions testing and the like. If that still pisses you off somehow, I suggest you move to Beijing and then complain about how I'm killing the planet. I've also been putting in better sound insulation, making it better for everyone, being quieter to the outside observer while I'm still getting some kickass sound. I may like to be loud and proud, but I don't like to be a jackass about it. The thing that makes me doubt your response's authenticity is the neons: if you were a true radical environmentalist, you would likely claim that my neons are causing light pollution and the like. Finally, no, I don't need to move to a moon since what I want to do is perfectly reasonable and legal on this planet. You're not talking to a deranged psycho murderer who wants to put an end to all civilized legislation on the planet. Besides, If I did have a colony on the moon, we would have actually progressed to some degree, which seems to be something humankind is afraid of for some reason.

 

[Mauler]

Just go into denial and (im speakin' about myself)hang around whith friends that kinda understand you whithout judging you and just screw the rest of em saying that: At least im hawing a good time ... Yeah...

 

[Dr. Doomsduck]

I HATE THIS STATEMENT!

With a burning passion, growing up? What does that even mean? The people who tell me to do this, are the kind of people who take a bunch of millionaires playing children's ball games so seriously they punch each other over simply the colour of their shirts.

Let me back track a little, I work in a pub, a sports pub to be exact, now I'm not a great lover of sports, I like watching a handful of them (Ice Hockey, Moto GP, Tennis) and I like playing them in general even if I suck at them. But I make no secret of my love for all things, well, escapist and fantastical, often during quiet periods, if I have no bar cleaning or stocking up to do, I'll whip out a pad or a book and draw/read something, which as anyone who's ever done either activity in public knows; draws a crowd.

But it does seem to me that many people take offence to this, with comments regularly coming in the form of; "What are you reading that for?", "Aren't you a bit old to be drawing Pokémon?" and "Don't you think it's time you grew out of that crap?" apparently being in your mid 20's and having an imagination is some kind of affront to these people. But typically, despite the burning rage it fills me with, the assertion, that somehow I'm childish for reading a book, but they aren't for jumping up and down when their favourite team scores is ridiculous to me. I however just brush it off with this simple comment; "What's the point of being an adult, with disposable income, if I'm not going to do all the childish things I ever wanted to do? So long as my bills are paid and food's in the fridge, why do you care?" Which usually shuts them up.

Then there was the time I wore my MLP;FiM shirt to work... but lets not get into that.

So my question to you guys is; How do you handle being called childish for enjoying things in realms many older people still see as the exclusive realm of children?

Whenever someone tells me to grow up, I usually respond like XKCD taught me to:

Captcha:rose bud

 

[Strazdas]

no, you dont get to do what you want. if you want to do what you want go live in an anarchy. if you dont like that then follow the rules and get rid of the SUV thats killing nature and stop bothering everyone with your sound system (neons do no damage, except if you break them so keep them). having a hobby is not the same as "fuck everyone i do what i want". you shoudl go live on a moon, becasue as long as you live on earth you should not be allowed to destroy it.

I'm not sure if I'm reading something by a person who is joking, or someone who is genuinely pissed at my loud and proud approach to life. If the first one is true, I commend your attempt at satire, but if you're dead serious I'll have you know my truck is a newer, more fuel-efficient model with an engine that just passed the US's emissions testing and the like. If that still pisses you off somehow, I suggest you move to Beijing and then complain about how I'm killing the planet. I've also been putting in better sound insulation, making it better for everyone, being quieter to the outside observer while I'm still getting some kickass sound. I may like to be loud and proud, but I don't like to be a jackass about it. The thing that makes me doubt your response's authenticity is the neons: if you were a true radical environmentalist, you would likely claim that my neons are causing light pollution and the like. Finally, no, I don't need to move to a moon since what I want to do is perfectly reasonable and legal on this planet. You're not talking to a deranged psycho murderer who wants to put an end to all civilized legislation on the planet. Besides, If I did have a colony on the moon, we would have actually progressed to some degree, which seems to be something humankind is afraid of for some reason.

Very good response.
My post was mostly joking but with a grain of truth. What your wrote here is not what was reflected by the post i quoted.

You're not talking to a deranged psycho murderer who wants to put an end to all civilized legislation on the planet.

and yet thats the vibe your first post was making, which is why i decided to response.
While i do care for enviroment i am nowhere near those radicals and i do agree that a person should be able to do what he wants provided he does not harm anyone else by doing it, like, say, murder. However stating "fuck you i do what i want" is exactly what anarchy is, and anarchy is nowhere near progress.

 

[Bertylicious]

No, but being married with kids isn't for everyone either.

I don't want kids, or a wife for that matter. At some point, when I'm too old for casual sex... nah, I still don't think I'd want one then.

Well of course nobody actually WANTS kids. They just get to a point where they're wringing their hands and thinking; "Oh God, oh God, life is empty and meaningless! I must fill the void with something!"

Children are great for providing structure and direction to one's life. It's a bit like joining the army.

I suppose from a moral perspective it's also useful because if we assume, and it's a big 'if', that we have a moral or at least personal duty to undertake some manner of self actualisation or vocation to humanity, nation or community then I guess having kids allows us to not bother by putting a provision in for someone else to do our bit in the future.

 

[VeneratedWulfen93]

I hate the statement also. Im 19 years old, live with my parents, I watch cartoons and collect and paint plastic miniatures. I don't want to grow up , I'm happy enough now. I hate responisbility which is why I don't do relationships and hope to never have a kid.

In short, I agree with you and disagree with some peoples views on what a success in life is.

 

[an annoyed writer]

Very good response.
My post was mostly joking but with a grain of truth. What your wrote here is not what was reflected by the post i quoted.

You're not talking to a deranged psycho murderer who wants to put an end to all civilized legislation on the planet.

and yet thats the vibe your first post was making, which is why i decided to response.
While i do care for enviroment i am nowhere near those radicals and i do agree that a person should be able to do what he wants provided he does not harm anyone else by doing it, like, say, murder. However stating "fuck you i do what i want" is exactly what anarchy is, and anarchy is nowhere near progress.

Unfortunately in my area of residence free expression of self is treated like a cry for anarchy: it is either willfully ignored or met with outright hostility. I do believe you missed part of the context of my first post: the "Fuck you, I do what I want!" is generally in response to my parents, and others like them, who attempt to regulate my personal behavior to fit with their standards. Standards that I reject and supplant with my own.

 

[JemothSkarii]

Considering I've been a NEET for the last...8 months that rarely leaves the house due to a low amount of friends nearby and most of them being at Uni. I hear it a lot; sure I'm 21 and I probably should be working but considering I'll be travelling overseas about 3 times in the next 12 months...I don't really have time for a job. Considering I live in a moderate sized town with a somewhat severe case of Cerebal Palsy I can only get into select jobs that are often taken.

But yeah...I need to grow up and try harder apparently...risen my anxiety to new heights.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

A man or woman who is an adult realises the following things:

All emotions are valid and suppressing some for fear of judgement doesnt make you strong. It makes you weak. It is weak live a life dictated by what others think they should feel and do. It is weak live a life dictated by fear. If a man wants to cry he fucking cries and no one can tell him he has no right to. He is strong enough to know his emotions do not get dictated to him by others. And to know that no one can make him unmanly.

Your interests have zero bearing on your character and what defines a man/woman/adult is depth of character not what TV shows interest you. If i told you my favourite shows you wouldnt know me. Anymore than my favourite colour makes me an adult. These things are extremely unimportant. Trying to like what others like to avoid judgement is a life based on fear again. If fear of others opinions owns you youre not an adult. Only children desire constant recognition and approval to validate what they are. An adult gets these things enough from themselves to not NEED it from others, its just a nice bonus.

An adult knows they are an adult and doesnt need to state it or have it stated to them or attempt to BE an adult to validate that. Knowing youre an adult is part of leaving childhood behind and knowing that nothing you enjoy in your free time can possible take that away from you. Youre an adult no matter what others say or what you enjoy. The only thing that can take away your adulthood is you behaving in a way that is totally dependent on what others say and think.

Being an adult is about becoming your own person. Children are programmed to copy and depend on parents and friends to learn how to be members of society. Its the training wheels for life if you will. Its totally ok to try and fit in and like what others like as a young child. You dont have any basis for what YOU is yet so you need a baseline of what others are to try and get a firm grip of it. And thats fine because you have literally zero life experience and total dependence on everyone is forced on you due to your inability to work and own property. But becoming an adult is letting go of that baseline and embracing what YOU are away from others now. Letting go of the security of knowing the social "average" will always be safe and approved and discovering independently what it is that IS you that others ARNT.

If youre still desperately looking around at others for security, for what you should like and do and say to validate you and make you feel safe in what you are youre not an adult. An adult doesnt need outside validation to know the things they want to do are the things they want to do. Its healthy to enjoy these things. It isnt healthy to be entirely dependent on them. Thats what being a child is for.

 

[MetaKnight670]

Yeah, I just do my best to ignore it OP. I have been hearing this statement a lot recently from one of the people I am living with recently. Just seems to work better if you ignore it. I have a feeling he may let up if he thinks it doesn't bug me.

Just because I enjoy the things I do does not make me a child, nor does actually having fun in the day to day life.

In fact, I think people try and grow up too fast in general.

snip

This however is more well worded than mine, but I have the same ideas. So, well done Biscuit.

 

[Jaeke]

Seriously...

You wore a MLP shirt to work, a sports bar no less, and were insulted when the response you got was negative. And then go on to complain about it on a forum page in order to somehow justify your inability to cope with it, and convince yourself you're in the right?

You seriously do need to grow up, just a little bit.

If you truly were the kind of mature person you seem to hold yourself to be, you wouldn't care, and you'd realize that's the payment you make for being a nerd.

I wear my nerd banner proudly, but I don't get offended when people do notice. Mostly, because the people I surround myself with are people that have similar interest, and also, because I don't go flaunting it in places I know it only attracts needless attention and further needless antagonizing, and lastly, because I love the stuff I do to much to care about what one person thinks.

On second thought, you need a lot of growing up to do.

 

[Walter44]

I'm always baffled by this reaction, to be fair. People who say this basically mean "once you reach a certain, arbitrary age, you're not allowed to like stuff you once liked as a kid". In other words: They kind of see the development of a human kind of like (ironically enough) the evolution process in Pokémon. Once you reach a certain age, you "evolve" from a child to an adult and change completely. But that's not true. Human development is a process. You don't stop liking or doing things just because a certain amount of time has passed. Yes, there are people who genuinely lost interest in "childish" things like cartoons, comics, video games and whatnot, but there are also people who never stopped liking certain things once they discovered them. And there are - I'm pretty sure - also people who liked "adult" things, like sports when they were younger but then lost interest in that an picked up a Nintendo DS, or a comic book or something and got interested in these "childish" things when they were already older. It's just like that one Doctor Who quote: "There?s no point being grown-up if you can?t be childish sometimes."

When I was younger, I played Pokémon. I don't anymore, but not because it's too childish for me, but because the new games didn't do it for me. Now I'm interested in more "adult" things like politics, philosophy, history etc. more than I was several years ago (although, to be fair, this stuff always interested me a little bit). But I still watch cartoons. I still play Mario games and other "children's games". And there are several "adult" things I just can't get behind (smoking, drinking, sports, FPS-Games, patronizing people because they're interested in things society says they shouldn't...)

So what?

 

[CrimsonBlaze]

Simple policy: do whatever you like and whatever makes you happy, so long as you are not harming others or yourself.

So long as your hobbies or interests do not conflict with other aspects of your life or prevent you from living a full and healthy life, then be a fan of whatever you wish and do what you desire. There are far too many people that have completely screw them selves and those around them that they find some comfort in bringing down someone who enjoys doing something that they despise. Ignore these pricks and carry on; you're happy and they are not, so the battle has been won long before it could even begin.

 

[Parallel Streaks]

I consider growing up learning to take responsibility, being less headstrong about damn near everything and just learning to get along with people. That's it. Hobbies, interests, favourite films, TV shows, cartoons, videogames, none of it has anything to do with growing up. Growing up is becoming a person who can function in the world independently, in my eyes, everybody can watch, listen to, read or play whatever the hell they want.

 

[Korolev]

Everyone needs to grow up, all the time. You should never stop "growing up". You should always strive to be more mature, more responsible, more collected and more knowledgeable.

Those people telling you to "Grow Up" are right - but the lesson also applies to them. No one is perfect, no one is truly mature all the time - not even the very old. We all have room for self-improvement, we all have room to grow.

 

[DugMachine]

Don't even let it get to you. People are always going to have this dumb mindset when it comes to anything geek related. Even my own parents tell me to grow up and I'm almost 30 and already in my career doing splendid in my job but because I still cling to my old habits (gaming), I'm not 'mature' enough. Who cares? Do what makes you happy.

That being said, if all you do is enjoy your hobbies and don't work... Let's just say I have a few friends still living with their parents because they're not ready to accept adult responsibilities. So in a sense, yeah, people really do need to "grow up" sometimes. But that doesn't mean you need to change who you are.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

In my experience adults can be far more childish than 6 year olds at times. I prefer to stay where I am.