I Justin Drew Bieber am here to claim my rightful place as the ruler of The Escapist. for a time many have resisted the charms of the special red button badge however that will change today.
Effective immediately all who press the big red button and sign their souls over to me will recieve the antidote to a certain "gift" I have given all the members of the resistance. (I.E. anybody who has not pressed the button) this gift is known to may of you as Bieber Fever and in its final stages turns you into a crappy rip-off of me. far more humiliating than simply being a fan. if it turns out that you are immune then fear not. Any individual who has succumbed to the virus is biologically reprogrammed to hunt down others who are in the early stages of the virus and sing "Baby" to them until they break down.
oh also there's a dental plan for all of my minions.
And remember, you aren't truly free until you're with the Bieb.
Assimilate.
Effective immediately all who press the big red button and sign their souls over to me will recieve the antidote to a certain "gift" I have given all the members of the resistance. (I.E. anybody who has not pressed the button) this gift is known to may of you as Bieber Fever and in its final stages turns you into a crappy rip-off of me. far more humiliating than simply being a fan. if it turns out that you are immune then fear not. Any individual who has succumbed to the virus is biologically reprogrammed to hunt down others who are in the early stages of the virus and sing "Baby" to them until they break down.
oh also there's a dental plan for all of my minions.
And remember, you aren't truly free until you're with the Bieb.
Assimilate.
I go to bed and wake up to this?!
