Your Daughter's Date is Picking Her Up For The Prom....

[Shock and Awe]

what do you do? I just remembered a funny conversation I had with my buddies awhile back and we somehow got to this topic, talking about how we would mess with the poor bastard whos taking out our daughter.

I cam up with a funny idea of digging two holes in the back yard and filling one up. When he comes to pick her up I would take back there and point to the filled one and say something along the lines of, "If shes not home by 11 o'clock that's where your going, we clear?"

My friend just said he would tell the boy he looks a lot like the guy he raped in prison.

You guys got anything funny to say?

 

[evilgrim]

Nothing funny?
You said what would I do..
I'd let her.. I'm sure it's a big deal to her..
Even if you're afraid of the things they might do..
I'd advise avoiding having talks with her about it..
And.. Yeah.. Just respect her independence and stuff.

 

[orangebandguy]

'You are dead...'

I'd mouth that at him from behind my daughters back repeatedly.

 

[TheNamlessGuy]

DELETED

 

[Shock and Awe]

Nothing funny?
You said what would I do..
I'd let her.. I'm sure it's a big deal to her..
Even if you're afraid of the things they might do..
I'd advise avoiding having talks with her about it..
And.. Yeah.. Just respect her independence and stuff.

These are all jokes dude, even if we did them we would be like "jk lol" when we were done.

 

[TotallyFake]

When they go out the door I'd scream "NO SEX ALRIGHT?"

No, take the opposite tactic: Hand him a box of condoms with a wink.

For bonus marks: Hand him a box of extra-small condoms.

 

[Soxafloppin]

When they go out the door I'd scream "NO SEX ALRIGHT?"

No, take the opposite tactic: Hand him a box of condoms with a wink.

For bonus marks: Hand him a box of extra-small condoms.

Oh god, il keep this in mind.

 

[sephiroth1991]

But then you'll have two big holes in the garden

OT: Show him a tiger carpit, or head on the wall and "You fuck up, and you and that tiger will have something in common"

 

[Shock and Awe]

But then you'll have two big holes in the garden

OT: Show him a tiger carpit, or head on the wall and "You fuck her, and you and that tiger will have something in common"

fixed

And I would use the holes for flowers for the wife or something like that.

 

[TheNamlessGuy]

DELETED

 

[Jedamethis]

Cat ventriloquism!

Or just act all scared.

"Here's my daughter, just take her and leave! Please! I don't wanna die! *sob uncontrollably*

 

[SovietSecrets]

Can't hurt to open the door and the first thing he sees is you holding a shotgun.

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

When they go out the door I'd scream "NO SEX ALRIGHT?"

No, take the opposite tactic: Hand him a box of condoms with a wink.

For bonus marks: Hand him a box of extra-small condoms.

Genius.

 

[BlindMessiah94]

Sit them down and have the birds and the bees talk as awkwardly and slowly as possible. Then whip out as many embarassing photos and stories as I can. Follow by insisting you get his cell number in case of emergency. Then text him all night long.

 

[Super_Nintendo_Chalmers]

I'd just look at the kid and say; "Don't fuck around, or you'll be the one who's going to get fucked around."
And wink.

 

[Beartrucci]

When they go out the door I'd scream "NO SEX ALRIGHT?"

No, take the opposite tactic: Hand him a box of condoms with a wink.

For bonus marks: Hand him a box of extra-small condoms.

Also give him a box of extra large condoms as well and to try them both out. Definitely going to make things awkward....

I would let him in then inform him that I was just cleaning my revolver then get back to it. The three of us (or four, if I had a spouse in this scenario who was with us) would all sit down in the lounge and make small talk as I carefully clean my gun collection which is mounted on the wall along with my Medieval Viking weapon collection. Oh and as he is leaving I would inform him that I have had sniper training with Israeli crackpot snipers. That's sure to terrify him.

 

[Jinx_Dragon]

Make sure they have protection.

 

[quiet_samurai]

Tell him not to come into the house because she was so nervous that she took a huge wicked dump which requires some plunging effort on her part, and that you wouldn't want him to have witness that on this special night.

Best way to stop any sort of sex appeal between two people is to kill it early on.