Your fate is to be a villain in a horribly written story

[CaptainREBell]

I'd make it a musical.
Hey, if I'm gonna be stuck in some crappy predictabl story, I will do it with style.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

I'd conquer Canada with an army of mind-controlling ponies. The pointlessness of it all would amuse me greatly.

 

[Frozen Donkey Wheel2]

I imagine it'll go something like this:

 

[CorvusFerreum]

From an old book you find in a public bathroom you learn, that you are destined to become the villain in a horrific, clichéd videogame/comic/movie/novel etc. story of any genre you like.

How do you know about the book? I've never told anyone!

Since it's my destiny, it was obvious I would find it.
Also, it seems my plan to distract you all with this topic, while using the data you left here answering to hack your computers, to compine their power to a supercomputer, with wich I gain access to zee nuclear missles, to launch them on zee batman! MUHHAHAHA *twiddles moustache*

 

[Blunderboy]

Nothing. If it's destined to happen, nothing I do will impact on it. So probably just sit around gaming, going to the pub and reading alot.

 

[Frozen Donkey Wheel2]

Try to kill George Bush but in the process you become him, for example you actualy kill him but "No John...YOUR THE GEORGE BUSH!!

I-but...The...What?

 

[silver wolf009]

I have take the isotope and it will cause meltdown! If you do not agree to my demans- TOO LATE!

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Since it's my destiny, it was obvious I would find it.

Yet you forget. Our mother had twins, and I was the one pushed away while you had her love.

Also, it seems my plan to distract you all with this topic, while using the data you left here answering to hack your computers, to compine their power to a supercomputer, with wich I gain access to zee nuclear missles, to launch them on zee batman! MUHHAHAHA *twiddles moustache*

Of course, you forgot to make sure that the missiles weren't running on Windows ME, so in reality they're heading back here to destroy us both.

I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE, BROTHER!

 

[Macrobstar]

I would make a machine that would suck all the oxygen out of the atmosphere, then sell it to people at outlandish prices muhahahahaahahaha

 

[EBHughsThe1st]

I would instantly strap a can onto my neck and tie it around it with wire and pretend I'm mind controlled.

So, then I would get out, like, a bazooka or giant sword and start just killing stuff or destroying things. Maybe get a minigun and unload on everything in sight, or unleash a magical power do about the same thing.
Since the device is so poorly-described, suspension of disbelief will allow the heroes to believe that it's actually controlling me, so the hero will strike it, I'll snap back to the good side, and I won't die.

Because in these kinds of stories, the villains usually die.

 

[LaughingAtlas]

Why, no, I don't think any part of that plan would work as anticipated.

Really? Seems pretty solid to me.

Haha, Solid. Like the people trapped in cement, similar to the Pompeii eruption. Quite clever.
The drug dealers would probably have some security, (though being a supervillian, I suppose my minions would probably have some advantage) they probably wouldn't send all the police in the city to break up the would-be Woodstock, the cement sludge might flow far enough to reach me and muck up the robbery anyway, and there's no guarentee the "stop taking pills" thing would have any effect on consumers. (kind of like the pills)
Then again, this being a hypothetical, poorly written world, maybe it'd be fine after all?

 

[Sandernista]

I would slowly develop a giant drill that would dig deep into the earth.

Then I would crown my self King of Earth, and ransom the world governments! Because my drill will do... something!

 

[Anchupom]

Turns out I'm the main character's father?

Woah, I gotta get laid so I can have a child who will stop me ruling the universe.

 

[ACman]

Now I am leaving Earth forever, for no raisin!

 

[CorvusFerreum]

Since it's my destiny, it was obvious I would find it.

Yet you forget. Our mother had twins, and I was the one pushed away while you had her love.

Also, it seems my plan to distract you all with this topic, while using the data you left here answering to hack your computers, to compine their power to a supercomputer, with wich I gain access to zee nuclear missles, to launch them on zee batman! MUHHAHAHA *twiddles moustache*

Of course, you forgot to make sure that the missiles weren't running on Windows ME, so in reality they're heading back here to destroy us both.

I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE, BROTHER!

*Camera zooms out slowy from the ashes of my doomfortress*
*one of the hangar doors opens and a bowler shaped spaceship shoots out of it and flies away*
"It has just begun, batman! MUHAHAHA"

 

[MortarTeam]

I'd follow that one Evil Overlord List [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/EvilOverlordList] that was written a few years back.

I'd also be one of the most Genre Savvy villains ever, simply because of the fact that I lurk TVTropes. Just because the story is written badly does not mean I can't have a competent and effective plan.

Goddamned tropers! Are you everywhere? You just may have ruined bunch of lives! (So already starting on the super-villain thing, eh?)

 

[kayisking]

Hello. I have gravely voice with russian accent, I have an eye-patch and I wear nice suit. This means I am leader of terrorists.

A cookie for anybody that can guess the reference.

 

[TheLastSamurai14]

I'd follow that one Evil Overlord List [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/EvilOverlordList] that was written a few years back.

I'd also be one of the most Genre Savvy villains ever, simply because of the fact that I lurk TVTropes. Just because the story is written badly does not mean I can't have a competent and effective plan.

Argh! TV Tropes! And I was just taking a break from something productive, too. Damn it!

I've already read that whole thing, by the way.

Ehehehehehehe [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/EvilLaugh]. You'll come around eventually and thank me [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/SugarWiki/TVTropesWillEnhanceYourLife].

Gah. Too many links. But anyway, yeah, I seem to have been sucked into the timesink myself. Hell, TVTropes is my alternative to Minecraft and The Escapist for when I want to waste time, and that's saying something.

Goddamned tropers! Are you everywhere? You just may have ruined bunch of lives! (So already starting on the super-villain thing, eh?)

Everything is going according to my design. Soon, you Escapists will call me...master. Something something something DARK SIDE. Something something something COMPLETE.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

*Camera zooms out slowy from the ashes of my doomfortress*
*one of the hangar doors opens and a bowler shaped spaceship shoots out of it and flies away*
"It has just begun, batman! MUHAHAHA"

[HEADING=1]NooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOoooOOOOoooOOOoooOOoooOOOoo![/HEADING]

I shall return!