Your Mother

[FPLOON]

My mother has a job and is a respected person in the community... Sure, she's been dating the same guy for 15+ years, but the things they do in their bedroom is their own damn business!

Other than that, my mother, in conjunction to my grandmother, raised me to be a pretty cool dude in my own right...

 

[Verlander]

[Insert arrogant British "Don't know about Mom, but I do have a Mum" whine here]

We've grown apart as we've gotten older. I don't respect her views and don't respect many of her life choices. I'm grateful that she raised me, and that she's there for my children if they need her.

 

[JoJo]

What the hell did you say about my mother Taco? I'll fight you and every damn person in this thread for her honour, by Jove!

(She's pretty awesome)

Your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberry!!!

Now fite me irl, JoJo.

Give me your address Sanguinius and I'll be right at your house in a minute. Might have to do a bit of swimming first to get there but then it'll be fisticuffs good sir!

So be it, old chum. I've already notified the coast guard to give me a call when they see a possibly deranged Brit trying to enter our national waters. A friendly fellow named Dirk will direct you to the field of battle. Bring two Golden Retrievers and a can of whipped cream.

I'm on my way, be sure to bring a second and swords in-case we decide to duel. Bards will sing of this fight for generations, indeed.

 

[SanguiniusMagnificum]

What the hell did you say about my mother Taco? I'll fight you and every damn person in this thread for her honour, by Jove!

(She's pretty awesome)

Your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberry!!!

Now fite me irl, JoJo.

Give me your address Sanguinius and I'll be right at your house in a minute. Might have to do a bit of swimming first to get there but then it'll be fisticuffs good sir!

So be it, old chum. I've already notified the coast guard to give me a call when they see a possibly deranged Brit trying to enter our national waters. A friendly fellow named Dirk will direct you to the field of battle. Bring two Golden Retrievers and a can of whipped cream.

I'm on my way, be sure to bring a second and swords in-case we decide to duel. Bards will sing of this fight for generations, indeed.

Pffff... bards. That's just some lowly entertainment for filthy serfs. I, like a real aristocrat, always have a Jesuit monk on stand-by to chronicle my glorious exploits!!! The epic tale of SanguiniusMagnificum the Third, Vanquisher of JoJo, will be read by historians for thousands of years!!!

 

[Someone Depressing]

A hulking monster of a human. A hulking monster who can down a bottle of vodka, and she'll be more sober than you are without any alcohol in your system. With muscles the width of her neck, and she has a singing voice like an angel that just drank a bottle of rat poison.

Yes, my mother does happen to be the musclebound whore that everyone calls her. And she will kick your ass if you insult her darling son.

My brother gets it so lucky; she just beats me up and asks me for money.

 

[SuperSuperSuperGuy]

My mom is awesome. She's reasonable and supportive, and she's always there to lend a calm, rational and kind perspective on things. She's very proud of me and my siblings, and she's very willing to trust us and give us responsibilities. I feel blessed to have such support in my life.

My best friend, on the other hand, is a different story. Without going into details, her mother is what people call a narcissistic parent [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_parent]. I can't really speak for her and her experiences, but I'm quite concerned about her.

 

[Stasisesque]

My mum's in hospital right now recovering from surgery to remove, hopefully all of the remaining, cancer. It's the third major surgery she's had in three months and to top it all I'm moving in two days and won't be able to see her as often. Hoping she gets home before I leave (she has an EDD of tomorrow so fingers crossed).

I love my mum unconditionally, and have been wishing it was me facing the cancer diagnosis rather than her. The last few months have been horrific and I really hope things will start looking up soon. I need my mum.

 

[EeveeElectro]

My mum's in hospital right now recovering from surgery to remove, hopefully all of the remaining, cancer. It's the third major surgery she's had in three months and to top it all I'm moving in two days and won't be able to see her as often. Hoping she gets home before I leave (she has an EDD of tomorrow so fingers crossed).

I love my mum unconditionally, and have been wishing it was me facing the cancer diagnosis rather than her. The last few months have been horrific and I really hope things will start looking up soon. I need my mum.

*hugs* I'm very sorry to hear that. Wishing your mum and speedy recovery and a bright future. Mums are tough!

OT: My mum is a whirlwind like me. She can be the kindest person or a *****. She's 9/10 the former, always helping people out and sometimes letting people walk all over her which is when I usually step in. She's chill about some things and hysterical about others so she's fairly unpredictable and difficult to live with.
Overall I'm lucky though considering what we've been through as a family.

 

[2012 Wont Happen]

She is a kindly late middle aged woman. She has had three husbands, and know she had at least two other serious relationships, so at least 5. At most a couple more based on how young her first marriage was and what years she's bee married. So from slightly below the average person to maybe one above?

Pretty normal

 

[Sean Hollyman]

Moving out to live at Uni has made me realize one thing above all:

I really fucking miss my parents.

 

[Lieju]

My mum's cool.

She always tought me to think critically and encouraged my nerdy interests.
She took time to talk to me about stuff and analyzed literature with me.

When I was a kid I knew from her there was nothing wrong or odd being gay, and when I went crying to her when I was maybe 6 telling her I didn't want to be a girl she sat down, and talked with me to find out if I was trans.

When I was sexually harassed in high school and thought it was my fault and eventually talked to her she got so mad at the boy I realized he had been in the wrong.

And when I figured I was a lesbian I wasn't sure if I should come out to her, not because I was scared she'd reject me, but because I knew she wouldn't care so why make a big deal out of it with her?

Also she has gone through some shit I never even knew about as a kid...

She is the kindest, most polite person I know.
But if you do something that's against her morals she's not gonna take any of your shit.

 

[sextus the crazy]

I got two of 'em and they're both pretty cool. Plus, you can put 'em in an arena a watch 'em fight for your amusement (JK, love you ).

 

[Nick Lerman]

Never forget...

She will silently judge you, FOREVER
and possibly command you to do terrible things.

 

[Something Amyss]

Well Escapists, is your mother the whore 12 year olds on Call of Duty said she was?

They said that? OMG. They've always been so nice to me to my face. What did they say? I have to know!

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

I'm one of five kids, so I can easily say that my mom has had sex at least five times in her life.

Luv me mama. She probably wouldn't know how to open a cardboard box if someone didn't show her first, but I luv me mama.

 

[Guffe]

My mom's great!

We are in touch mainly via the facebook chat but we call occassionally, I've only been living away from home for 2 years and she still doesn't seem to get it

I visit my parents once a month or so, mom always runs around and wants hugs and stuff while dad just sits around, looks at me when I enter and sais something like "'sup?" like I've only been away to work or something

But yeah, not only mom, but dad also, best parents I could've asked for!