Somebody gonna get a'hurt REEEAAAL bad!Khell_Sennet said:
Someone needs to call out GM for their latest ad slogan, and I guess that someone is me...
Once upon a time, there was this company called General Motors. They made passable vehicles, and for a time, things were good. But things stayed too good for too long. You see, there are a bunch of corporations that are collectively known as "Big Oil", and Big Oil has been in bed with the car manufacturers since both came about. We became dependent on Big Oil to make our cars work, and we needed our cars to work because we had all given up horses as our means of transportation. But Big Oil didn't ever want to fade away like horses did before them, so they spent considerable time and effort into stifling progress. You see, we should have outgrown the standard Internal Combustion Engine long ago, but Big Oil doesn't want that, so they buy out or crush any company that threatens their stranglehold on the civilized world. While my gripe right now is with GM, it is important to realize just how good car manufacturers have it. They literally own us, because without cars (or something better), the world as we know it cannot function. And as they won't let that "something better" see the light of day, the automobile manufacturers literally have us by the balls.
SO HOW IN THE FUCK DID THEY FAIL SO HORRIBLY?
GM and its inbred bastard half-brothers Ford an Chrysler all managed to go tits-up in a market where we have little to no choice in what we buy. We WILL need a car, and theirs were even the cheapest, and yet the Japanese managed to sneak in under the radar (just like Pearl Harbor, but with Corollas and Civics instead of bombs and torpedoes) and wipe the floor with "THE BIG 3". You see, there is a market for "cheap" and a market for "quality", and room for both to exist. But when someone comes in with a product that is top quality, and yet cheaper than inferior products...
Somebody Gonna Get A' Hurt!(tm)
Now today, as I drive around in my cozy little [font color=blue]Toyota Matrix[/font], I keep hearing on the radio a bunch of shit in the form of a GM radio commercial...
[font color=#303030]Blah Blah Blah Best In Class
Blah Blah Blah Great Mileage
Blah Blah Blah Good for the Environment
Blah Blah Blah Will Suck You Off As it Drives
[sub]And then we get to the good part...[/sub]
General Motors. May The Best Car Win.[/font]
Are you fucking shitting me? May the best car win?
[HEADING=2][font color=black]THE BEST CAR ALREADY WON, JACKHOLES! IT WAS [/font][font color=red]JAPANESE[/font][font color=black]![/font][/HEADING]I don't care if it's Toyota, Nissan, Mitsubishi, or Honda... The winner was a Japanese car, followed closely by European contestants Volvo and VW. Really, about the only worse cars than American-made were the Korean junkers of Hyundai and Kia, yet even those sold better because they at least had a half-decent warranty (and most people thought they were buying Japanese... Oops).
How can GM advertise with a straight face, using that line? They aren't the "Best Car". They have never been the "Best Car". And I highly doubt they ever will be. They were sub-par clunkers, disposable vehicles made to last ten years at best, and their only redeeming feature was a lower price than imports. And you know, that was enough, for a time... But failure to innovate, failure to evolve, had left GM and his retard brothers in the Big 3 as the greatest economic failures the world has seen to-date. Previously it was Air Canada, but they've passed the torch. GM, my ass salutes you.
Somehow, this European manufacturer didn't make the list...
Also tell them to stop being one of the most corrupt corporations ever while you are at it.
