Your views on bisexuality
- Thread starter Everin
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I relate to topics like this a lot because all but one of my friends are gay or bi.
There is one thing about Bisexuality that bothers me somewhat and that's that if a woman says she had sex with a woman everyone assumes bi, and if a man says he had sex with a man everyone assumes gay.
Even if the people the guy said told know that the other guy has had sex with women in the past.
On to your points
1) Hell yeah, if I was bi I'd use it as a selling point. If you go out with me we can have 3-ways you're comfortable with!
2) Well, I have been on the receiving end of: "I'm a lesbian" "You know I'm gay right?" "I could have sworn I told you I was bisexual before now." and even "I think I might be bi, will you help me find out for sure." (That was a good day...) I think it's pretty cool
3) Bi sexuality is the best sexuality. (Even if you count all 3000 subsets of bisexuality)
And I'm one to talk, I'm strait.
There is one thing about Bisexuality that bothers me somewhat and that's that if a woman says she had sex with a woman everyone assumes bi, and if a man says he had sex with a man everyone assumes gay.
Even if the people the guy said told know that the other guy has had sex with women in the past.
On to your points
1) Hell yeah, if I was bi I'd use it as a selling point. If you go out with me we can have 3-ways you're comfortable with!
2) Well, I have been on the receiving end of: "I'm a lesbian" "You know I'm gay right?" "I could have sworn I told you I was bisexual before now." and even "I think I might be bi, will you help me find out for sure." (That was a good day...) I think it's pretty cool
3) Bi sexuality is the best sexuality. (Even if you count all 3000 subsets of bisexuality)
And I'm one to talk, I'm strait.
All the Bi people I know in real life are all doing it for attention (but have never actually ever gone out or done it with the same sex), which is really sad because I know that there are genuinely Bi-sexual people out there that arn't attention seeking and these guys give them a bad name.
I know what you mean, I'm a bi man myself and when I ever I tell people or someone brings it up I end up getting the "You're just doing for the attention" card.xplosive59 said:
I tend to have the viewpoint of ''It got nothing to do with me, so let people do whatever they want'' but I do hate how most teenagers proclaim themselves bi-sexual just to seem different. Sexuality isn't a f'ing trend people -_- I bet you that over half of those people haven't even kissed one of the same sex as themselves.
Everin said:
*takes a look at the responses*
Wow, this didn't turn into a flame war like many of the others. Huh.
The thread that got me into the Escapist was actually a thread like this talking about bisexuality and pansexuality. My favorite response to the then-current bisexual haters was:
It made me laugh. ^_^You see this bicycle? It's not actually a bicycle. It's actually a tricycle, or maybe a unicycle in denial.
By the way, I'm bi. While I usually tell people before I date them, this is mostly because my friends find out pretty quickly due to me enjoying both guy and girl fanservice, or another situation where it comes up. I don't feel like I have an obligation to tell my dates if it doesn't come up (as I won't cheat anyways), but I definitely won't hide it.
As for how I'd respond to someone telling me that the they were bisexual, it depends on their gender. If guy, say "alright then" and congratulate them on being an endangered species. If a girl, say "alright then". And then invite both to the secret bisexual no-pants parties.
As for whether it's wrong.... O' course it is, love. You obviously need to choose between guys and girls, or you're just being a greedy nymphomaniac. If you say anything different, you're obviously in league with the homosexuals, and pushing the gay agenda on our kids.
Wait, what? Most[footnote]wrong[/footnote] people I know think that bisexual girls are doing it for the attention, and that bisexual guys don't even exist.Mr.Grim said:
1) Honestly, I don't see the point. Unless you're in an open relationship it seems utterly irrelevant. If it came up, I doubt I'd deny it, but bringing it up strikes me as being little different than talking about your ex. As far as I'm concerned, the only part of your sexuality that's relevant is whether or not you're interested in your date. Do note, that assumes a monogamous relationship. If you're polyamorous, it's a much more relevant detail, especially if you're talking about threesomes.
2) Meh. Don't see why it should matter to me unless the person was expressing interest in me (if so, that aspect is what would inspire a reaction either way from me).
3) By what criteria would it be wrong? Provided it doesn't harm anyone, a given person's sexual life is that person's business and that of whatever partner(s) they have (and their roommate(s), just so they don't barge in on them).
2) Meh. Don't see why it should matter to me unless the person was expressing interest in me (if so, that aspect is what would inspire a reaction either way from me).
3) By what criteria would it be wrong? Provided it doesn't harm anyone, a given person's sexual life is that person's business and that of whatever partner(s) they have (and their roommate(s), just so they don't barge in on them).
Just to play devil's advocate, most straight people don't have to "prove" their sexuality by kissing (or doing anything more with) someone of the opposite sex. You can know what you're attracted to before you get an opportunity to act on it.Keymik said:
While I don't doubt that some people claim to be bi for attention, I really don't think it's anything like as common as people make out, and assuming that someone's lying just because they're young is spectacularly unhelpful for the kids who really do know they're gay or bi.
I'm lesbian myself, and while some lesbians have negative views on bisexuals, I wouldn't care.
As for telling the person you date, I'd be upset if they felt they had to hide it from me, but I don't think it's really something they should tell, it would probably come up naturally at some point anyway.
I mean, if I'm in a relationship, the thing that would matter is that she is attracted to me.
For a homo/bisexual it can be a bit tricky. As much as I'd wish my sexuality didn't matter, it will to some people, and knowing they will automatically assume you are straight can feel like you are misleading them.
As for telling the person you date, I'd be upset if they felt they had to hide it from me, but I don't think it's really something they should tell, it would probably come up naturally at some point anyway.
I mean, if I'm in a relationship, the thing that would matter is that she is attracted to me.
Yes, but you are straight, and that's what most people are going to assume.RustlessPotato said:
For a homo/bisexual it can be a bit tricky. As much as I'd wish my sexuality didn't matter, it will to some people, and knowing they will automatically assume you are straight can feel like you are misleading them.
1) Of course. Why hide it? There's nothing wrong with it.Everin said:
2) My GF recently told me she was. My reaction was "Oh, alright". Honestly, it's not something that's that big a deal, really.
3) I think my stance is clear. Being bisexual is no more messed up than being straight, IMO.
1) Yeah eventually. I wouldn't be one of those people who tells everyone they meet practically straight away, they come across rather attention seeky and weird. It'd obviously be told at some point, just not day one.
2) If someone told me 'Oh'. would be the extent of my reaction honestly. Where i'm from homo and bi sexuality is so damned common its failed to even surprise me anymore. Unless it was someone i was certain was straight then maybe they'd get a 'wow really?' but thats only a maybe.
3) You'll hear age old jokes about Bis being indecisive or greedy, but meh. You can never say its wrong of someone to have a sexual orientation. Its wrong to tell people its wrong to have a specific sexual orientation.
2) If someone told me 'Oh'. would be the extent of my reaction honestly. Where i'm from homo and bi sexuality is so damned common its failed to even surprise me anymore. Unless it was someone i was certain was straight then maybe they'd get a 'wow really?' but thats only a maybe.
3) You'll hear age old jokes about Bis being indecisive or greedy, but meh. You can never say its wrong of someone to have a sexual orientation. Its wrong to tell people its wrong to have a specific sexual orientation.
I don't see why I would. I'm gay, and so far no bisexual I have dated told me in advance, nor did I believe they should. Why is it important? Sometimes it comes up, sometimes it doesn't. It feels as useful to know as, say, you liking black and blonde hair.Everin said:
"That's good for you". Honestly, people knowing their leanings is a good thing. There is literally zero downside for anyone being bisexual or not.
I'm not one of the one-million moms, so no.
Oh, I never got the "Bisexual guys don't exist" thing. I usually get the goddamn double standards. Ya know where when a women comes out as bi, generally, its "Oh your bi? ok". But when a guy comes out as bi suddenly, at least in my case, people forget about the fact that you still like women and go right for the "you like men" part. Now I know that reaction doesn't happen to every women or man when they say they're bi, but usually because of double standards, its a common reactionZen Toombs said:
1) Would you tell people you were going to date?
I'm hetero, so it did not come up. If I were bi, I'd tell the person I was with because it is the right thing to do.
2) How would you feel about this if someone told you?
Well, it did not bother me when my ex told me she had a lesbian tryst, so I don't think it'll matter in future.
3) Do you think that it's wrong to be bisexual?
No.
I'm hetero, so it did not come up. If I were bi, I'd tell the person I was with because it is the right thing to do.
2) How would you feel about this if someone told you?
Well, it did not bother me when my ex told me she had a lesbian tryst, so I don't think it'll matter in future.
3) Do you think that it's wrong to be bisexual?
No.
I don't think it's wrong, I just don't fucking get it, I get gay men although if I see 2 men making out in public it makes me feel kinda uneasy and I get lesbians seeing lesbians making out makes me less uneasy and it's rather nice if they are hot, don't judge me, but bisexuals I just don't fucking get.
1) Would you tell people you were going to date?
2) How would you feel about this if someone told you?
3) Do you think that it's wrong to be bisexual?
1) I wouldn't hide it, but I don't know that I'd necessarily say it right away. I mean, it would just depend on when it ever came up.
2) If it was a friend, or a guy I was going out with, I wouldn't mind. It'd make no difference to either relationship. But like, if I WAS going out with him I'd probably say something like "Really? You find girls attractive? ... HOW?"
3) Nahzville.
2) How would you feel about this if someone told you?
3) Do you think that it's wrong to be bisexual?
1) I wouldn't hide it, but I don't know that I'd necessarily say it right away. I mean, it would just depend on when it ever came up.
2) If it was a friend, or a guy I was going out with, I wouldn't mind. It'd make no difference to either relationship. But like, if I WAS going out with him I'd probably say something like "Really? You find girls attractive? ... HOW?"
3) Nahzville.