Zero Punctuation: Bulletstorm

Recommended Videos

NathanS

New member
Jul 13, 2009
12
0
0
A bit late I know, but I just saw this and reminded me of this article about Doom and what sets apart from modern FPSs.

http://vectorpoem.com/news/?p=74
 

drunken_munki

New member
Nov 14, 2007
124
0
0
Fun video :)

Maybe I've not had my coffee this morning but... can someone explain the wearing a bin comment to me?
 

Kinokohatake

New member
Jul 11, 2010
577
0
0
I think I am done caring about his reviews. It seems like he complains just to complain. I honestly love the game, and thought that after his complaining that he would enjoy the feel of it. But he isn't happy with anything so I am done. I guess a guy constantly complaining can only be entertaining for a little bit.
 

Levethian

New member
Nov 22, 2009
509
0
0
NathanS said:
A bit late I know, but I just saw this and reminded me of this article about Doom and what sets apart from modern FPSs.

http://vectorpoem.com/news/?p=74
Nice article.
Oblige + ZDoom2 + Aeons of Death ;) Excellent.
Thomas Guy said:
I think I am done caring about his reviews. It seems like he complains just to complain.
Really? I thought it was spectacularly predictable that he would relate Bulletstorm to Painkiller and think 'No'. His disappointment echoes what he's always said about modern shooters.
 

Zanderinfal

New member
Nov 21, 2009
442
0
0
Yeah...
Marik Bentusi said:
misterprickly said:
Why did we start making "not fun" games?
Probably because better graphics demanded making use of them, tilting everything towards realism.
I hope that's not the case for Crysis 2. Looks SWEET!
 

L-J-F

New member
Jun 22, 2008
302
0
0
"Realistic"? Honestly? Realistic games incredibly thin on the ground, jeez, give me some more I say. How on earth is GoW realistic, or Bulletstorm? They're about as realistic as the third Rambo movie ... no actually, much LESS realistic. As someone who enjoys realistic games (and has to search around like a detective for them, the unrealistic games I enjoy also, but much less) I find it mildly offensive, it'd be like me saying "I'm sick of all this tasty food!" and you replying "all we have are rocks and the odd piece of corn we pick out of the sewer". But hey, unrealistic games sell :(
 

The3rdEye

New member
Mar 19, 2009
460
0
0
halofreak123 said:
And yet another poo poo pancake reviewed by Yahtzee...
You realize that the entire point to ZP is to ruthlessly rage on whatever game happens to be crossing his path, right? Honestly, his videos are 6 minute long sprees of vitriol because anger is the easiest button to push on the day to day Escapist denizen. It's not "another panning", it's ZP where it's all pans all the time.[footnote]And before someone jumps me on it, yes he has given positive rambles to games (Painkiller and Saintsrow 2 most notably, since he keeps referencing them) but here's the rub; Those games, for whatever reason, rubbed Yahtzee "the right way". Opinions, kickbacks, snobbish non-mainstream attitude, whatever. They're no less flawed than Bulletstorm or any other game he pisses on, he just keeps his criticism saved for a small addendum at the end of the clip to hide that it's still shit.
Painkiller - The story is entirely needless and entirely forgotten during actual gameplay but you wouldn't think it how the way cinematics bang on and on emptying huge wastebins filled with half-baked expositional dialogue onto our screaming faces because they were determined to crowbar this shit in somewhere... the storyline can go fuck itself.[/footnote]


Marik Bentusi said:
misterprickly said:
Why did we start making "not fun" games?
Probably because better graphics demanded making use of them, tilting everything towards realism.
By your logic, since everyone seems to have such a nerd-on for classic era games, moving past 8 bit graphics was a mistake. The medium develops and with it the means and talent that can go into them. Saying "Baww, it's pretty so obviously that's why I didn't like it, they spend more time on the graphics than the 'fun'" doesn't suggest a decline in developer priorities, it's an indication that you won't like every game that comes out, even if they're from your favorite genre. If they can make something look great now in the same time it would have taken them to make something look good three years ago, why are you crapping on their initiative to do so?

OT: While I realize arguing against a ZP is about as effective a waste of time as you can get... I'm bored and I enjoy Bulletstorm so what the hell, I'll point out where he's just plain wrong.

On Realism[footnote]The human enemies are resembling your co-workers, in-laws and probation officers, with their mohawks, tatoos and piercings... wait what?[/footnote]
So sliding twelve feet on your ass and still having enough momentum to send someone end over end with your boot is...
So being able to kick someone across a hotel lobby is...
So being able to put a rope around someone's neck and pull them to you from two stories up is...
So PCF's attempt to have 50% of the color spectrum onscreen at any one time was...
So being able to steer a bullet in flight or separate someone's funzone from the rest of their body, kick a mine without it exploding, slowing time to launch someone into the air then light them on fire and cut them in half is... (and the killer thing is he mentions all of this later on so I'm not sure if he's "taking the piss" or he wrote each half of the episode on two separate days)
On chest-high walls
First, yes there are chest-high walls, but there is no GoW cover system, or ANY cover system for that matter. The environments would be pretty barren without crap littered all over the place (some less chest-high-ier than others) and ducking behind a wall not to get your ass blown off isn't a tired mechanic, it's limiting the chance of getting a superfluous new orifice. They don't need to put platforms covering all the bottomless pits in Mario, you need to jump.
On pacing
There's an entire game mode where you are being timed and rewarded for completing the stage quickly. Who exactly is playing to suggest that Bulletstorm is slow paced? Mice become slow paced if you put them in a freezer first. There's nothing to inhibit you from having a guns-blazing firepower romp through each level. Going on to complain that "enemies don't line up for the charged shots" kind of takes the piss when your kick and leash are all there in order to change how enemies line up, not to mention circle strafing and sliding. The game just won't hold your hand while you do it and the AI isn't as retarded as all hell.
 

Taunta

New member
Dec 17, 2010
484
0
0
Zack84 said:
se7ensenses said:
A gun w/ flaming tits all for not.
Hey, hey, hey--don't try to sound clever and ironically distinguished unless YOU FUCKING LEARN TO PHRASE THE CLICHE CORRECTLY. The word is "naught," meaning zero, worthless, nada. Tool.

Go ahead and put me on probation, somebody's got to stand up for fucking grammar on this website full of over-gamed uneducated fucktards.
Now was that really necessary? And what, exactly, did you gain from this?

But since you asked, there you go, have a report from me. :)
 

samaugsch

New member
Oct 13, 2010
595
0
0
Zack84 said:
se7ensenses said:
A gun w/ flaming tits all for not.
Hey, hey, hey--don't try to sound clever and ironically distinguished unless YOU FUCKING LEARN TO PHRASE THE CLICHE CORRECTLY. The word is "naught," meaning zero, worthless, nada. Tool.

Go ahead and put me on probation, somebody's got to stand up for fucking grammar on this website full of over-gamed uneducated fucktards.
I don't see why it matters as long as you can understand what the person is saying.
 

Zanderinfal

New member
Nov 21, 2009
442
0
0
The3rdEye said:
halofreak123 said:
And yet another poo poo pancake reviewed by Yahtzee...
You realize that the entire point to ZP is to ruthlessly rage on whatever game happens to be crossing his path, right? Honestly, his videos are 6 minute long sprees of vitriol because anger is the easiest button to push on the day to day Escapist denizen. It's not "another panning", it's ZP where it's all pans all the time.[footnote]And before someone jumps me on it, yes he has given positive rambles to games (Painkiller and Saintsrow 2 most notably, since he keeps referencing them) but here's the rub; Those games, for whatever reason, rubbed Yahtzee "the right way". Opinions, kickbacks, snobbish non-mainstream attitude, whatever. They're no less flawed than Bulletstorm or any other game he pisses on, he just keeps his criticism saved for a small addendum at the end of the clip to hide that it's still shit.
Painkiller - The story is entirely needless and entirely forgotten during actual gameplay but you wouldn't think it how the way cinematics bang on and on emptying huge wastebins filled with half-baked expositional dialogue onto our screaming faces because they were determined to crowbar this shit in somewhere... the storyline can go fuck itself.[/footnote]


Marik Bentusi said:
misterprickly said:
Why did we start making "not fun" games?
Probably because better graphics demanded making use of them, tilting everything towards realism.
By your logic, since everyone seems to have such a nerd-on for classic era games, moving past 8 bit graphics was a mistake. The medium develops and with it the means and talent that can go into them. Saying "Baww, it's pretty so obviously that's why I didn't like it, they spend more time on the graphics than the 'fun'" doesn't suggest a decline in developer priorities, it's an indication that you won't like every game that comes out, even if they're from your favorite genre. If they can make something look great now in the same time it would have taken them to make something look good three years ago, why are you crapping on their initiative to do so?

OT: While I realize arguing against a ZP is about as effective a waste of time as you can get... I'm bored and I enjoy Bulletstorm so what the hell, I'll point out where he's just plain wrong.

On Realism[footnote]The human enemies are resembling your co-workers, in-laws and probation officers, with their mohawks, tatoos and piercings... wait what?[/footnote]
So sliding twelve feet on your ass and still having enough momentum to send someone end over end with your boot is...
So being able to kick someone across a hotel lobby is...
So being able to put a rope around someone's neck and pull them to you from two stories up is...
So PCF's attempt to have 50% of the color spectrum onscreen at any one time was...
So being able to steer a bullet in flight or separate someone's funzone from the rest of their body, kick a mine without it exploding, slowing time to launch someone into the air then light them on fire and cut them in half is... (and the killer thing is he mentions all of this later on so I'm not sure if he's "taking the piss" or he wrote each half of the episode on two separate days)
On chest-high walls
First, yes there are chest-high walls, but there is no GoW cover system, or ANY cover system for that matter. The environments would be pretty barren without crap littered all over the place (some less chest-high-ier than others) and ducking behind a wall not to get your ass blown off isn't a tired mechanic, it's limiting the chance of getting a superfluous new orifice. They don't need to put platforms covering all the bottomless pits in Mario, you need to jump.
On pacing
There's an entire game mode where you are being timed and rewarded for completing the stage quickly. Who exactly is playing to suggest that Bulletstorm is slow paced? Mice become slow paced if you put them in a freezer first. There's nothing to inhibit you from having a guns-blazing firepower romp through each level. Going on to complain that "enemies don't line up for the charged shots" kind of takes the piss when your kick and leash are all there in order to change how enemies line up, not to mention circle strafing and sliding. The game just won't hold your hand while you do it and the AI isn't as retarded as all hell.
I mean that alot of the games that Yahtzee reviews, turn out to be crap. Nothing more. Sorry 'bout that.
 

Booze Zombie

New member
Dec 8, 2007
7,416
0
0
I wasn't expecting Bulletstorm to reinvent the wheel... pretty much all of the reviews I've seen have confirmed this belief.
 

Evil Tim

New member
Apr 18, 2009
536
0
0
misterprickly said:
But then something happened to them :(
Suddenly it wasn't OK to have fun shooting things (even a virtual thing) and shooters (for some reason) became taboo.
It was about the time that walking diagonally stopped making you go faster.
 

Doc Cannon

I hate custom titles.
Feb 3, 2010
247
0
0
I went into Bulletstorm expecting a new frantic screw-cover over-the-top-enemies carry-all-your-guns we-don't-care-about-no-backstory shooter.
Needless to say I was disappointed.
It is way too similar to Gears of War (which is not necessarily a bad thing) when it was marketed as mindless fun (à la Painkiller).
 

cill404

New member
Jun 8, 2010
5
0
0
bulletstorm had what sounded like the cheesiest, most immature dialogue ever. but gamplay and gun design was ball-tinglingly awesome
 

Xman490

Doctorate in Danger
May 29, 2010
1,186
0
0
Oh, Sir Wally McChesthigh, you never let us down. Instead, you force us down.

The difference between the Republican Space Rangers or stand-up comedians making dick/homo jokes and space marines or Dead Rising 2's motorcycle psycho is the timing. When done well, it's fast, furious, and works as a joke; these guys, however, take too long to make the joke and just make it awkward.
 

themanandrey

New member
Jan 12, 2011
4
0
0
Yeah i also downloa..... BOUGHT this game but due to annoying things like final exams i could not play it. But now i really want to see how the game is....IF I DON"T COME BACK ALIVE TELL MY WIFE I WAS THE ONE WHO LEFT THE TOILET SEAT UP
 

The3rdEye

New member
Mar 19, 2009
460
0
0
Pikey Mikey said:
I also played it on Hard and I think it was really fun, except for those fucking snipers and the fact that sniping an enemy in the balls was almost impossible (for me), because as soon as the (normal) bullet got near they would just cower and start running to the side, urgh, charge shot was great tough =)
May be a moot point by now but for future reference; you're absolutely right, pegging a nut shot is nearly impossible if you let the bullet get too close to the target and they start dashing (getting a nut shot using the PMC was tricky business for me a lot of the time, but that has more to do with hit detection). But you can either get their junk in your crosshairs and press "B" immediately upon firing or press it to cancel bullet control once you've flown the bullet onto a good trajectory, making nut cracker much easier to obtain, add Bluff for extra zazz.