Zero Punctuation: Eve Online

[Unholykrumpet]

Best was the mistress under the desk when he mentioned the corp guy neglecting his wife. Look closely it's there.

I saw that too and was like..."wait...really?" Anyway, I had a very similar experience to his (and many posters on the first page), and I can only think that maybe Eve is a "niche" game...for people that like that sort of thing. Personally, I found Eve dull.

The interface reference with the well made me chuckle...very true.

 

[ManBarrel]

I tried EVE online and was able to get into it for a while, but then gave up after falling asleep at the keyboard while in battle with *insert color and animal name here* pirates...

I wish I was kidding

 

[wiredk]

It can't try to be WoW because it was out BEFORE WoW. Like, back in 2001. Or atleast that was the Beta of it...


Point being, WoW tries to be it.

 

[MagnetoHydroDynamics]

"A game for people that are to nerds what nerds are to normal people"
Truly brilliant.

 

[Idaeus]

I enjoy EVE. I just wish people would fight my alliance more. Sitting inside a POS for 6 hours waiting to counter-drop someones capital ships and then being told ot log off because the enemy won't commit is often a downer.

So I just go scamming with an empire alt.

 

[frstkor13]

Look. Another expert review from an expert who is expert enough to think he can play the game for 2 days and give it some worthy video or article.

If you want simple and stupid, stick to single player. MMOs in general give you back what you put into them. Welcome to earth, where in all ways you will not give someone a dime and get back a 100 dollar bill.

Back when eve was 10 times worse that it is reviewed as here, The Escapist did an article praising it:

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/issue/19/23

I don't know why it is not there anymore, but the article was detailing this: http://eve.klaki.net/heist/

The Escapist reveled in that eve was brutal and allowed for the darkest bits of treachery in an MMO.

I generally like these insulting vids, and I must now consider myself a fanboi for frowning at a half ass review by someone who doesn't know what an Ferrari Enzo doing a test drive and slamming the car for being uncontrollable.

That is all.

 

[Random Argument Man]

It can't try to be WoW because it was out BEFORE WoW. Like, back in 2001. Or atleast that was the Beta of it...


Point being, WoW tries to be it.

ummm....no. That doesn't even make sense. Unless you never played wow.

 

[LAte]

Funny rewiev as always. You did miss the best part of the game which is fighting with other players, groups vs groups, group meaning anything between 2 and 300. And unless you join those player corps you are so much afraid, its very hard to get in those gangs

 

[Tibike77]

All being said (in my post above), with the caveat that "not joining a player corp and only doing PvE" represents maybe around 10% of what the game has to offer (and the really boring parts of it on top of it all)...
... I find it hard NOT to agree with him on many "concerns"

Yeah, the interface is a pile of steaming crap, sure the sheer number of skills is daunting, there's some level of grind involved (cash instead of XP) and you do tend to get flowchartitis from playing EVE for too long )

Review... well... a 7/10, I guess.
I've seen funnier, but this wasn't too bad.
I especially liked how he (intentionally?) made the ship fly backwards.

 

[Kira042]

Eve would have been actually MORE fun in a text based game. Space is so huge that you can barely see anything anyways and everything looks identical when you DO see it, so there is no point to the super graphics present in Eve. In fact, without the graphics they wouldn't need to set the Time Needed To Go Anywhere at seventeen hours.

 

[JoeNut]

ive never tried it and now definatly wont.

 

[mGoLos]

The spaceship with the gonad on his mantle was possibly the best thing to ever happen in this galaxy.

 

[Me37]

The "shoe on head" comment really leads me to believe you have been playing this game for a very long time, and most likely like it enuf to watch the alliance tournies.

 

[DarkSaber]

Talk about moment of truth. When I saw what the review was this week I was honestly expecting Yahtzee to wank off the game instead of crucify it strictly because EVE advertises on Escapist. I'm really surprised they let him put this video up. I have even more respect towards Escapist now.

Really? Even after his Age of Conan review that went up while the site was skinned up for Age of Conan?

 

[Veloxi]

Thank you for such an excellent review. As a space game fanatic, I'll play anything with a spaceship in it, and while I can handle most games, EVE bores the CRAP out of me.

If you want to try a space-based MMO wherein actual skill does matter, try Jumpgate -- wherin you actually have to fly the spaceships rather than simply pointing and clicking. Far, far superior, IMO.

 

[Talith]

Speaking as a 2-year EVE player, I will say a couple things:
a) UI needs some work (I quite like it actually)
b) Yahtzee reviewed low-level PVE content in a NPC corporation which is literally the least interesting thing you could do in the game
c) note about the skill-training system: real-time training seems weird, but since you can't train any skill past level 5 (and each level takes 4-5x as long as the one before it), it actually means that new players can be competitive with old players (if both of you have the same skills for frigates, and the other player has another 20mil skill points in other ships / weapons, those SP do nothing)
d) CCP Greyscale [dev] says: "consciously deciding not to join a corp is pretty much deciding that you don't want to have fun, in my experience."
e) Come back around winter, they should be releasing ambulation, which will let you leave your ship and walk around space stations (and eventually do a lot of very very cool things)

Good review though, I laughed pretty hard.
Signature Analysis was the best ( >_> and I've got that skill at lvl5 )

 

[VandreKhonos]

From a business perspective, EVE is clearly failing somewhere when it is unable to hook a player with its 14 day trial access. The whole idea of such a promotional gimmick is to portray to the player all the "fun", "shiny" and "awesome" stuff that the game has to offer. If it is relying on the individual to figure out that all the "fun" stuff is available only after joining a player corporation, it fails. If it expects the player to delude himself to believe the initial grindfest, as taught by the tutorial, is the most fun aspect of the game, it fails.

It may be a decent game, but the approach by the developers towards new gamers is a failure.

I also remember reading about EVE and some of its consumer relation problems...

 

[Swerve]

2nd job you have to pay for - spot on!

Whilst there is a lot that he didn't touch on, it's hard to find fault with any point in this review. 14 days will only scratch the surface of eve's gameplay though.

To be fair it's in the player run corps, alliances, that you find the game. All the npc stuff is just training really.

 

[Rogthgar]

Right on the money, EVE is huge, and drawn out. And combat is little more than circeling an opponent till either breaks, or someone is sitting 200km away and boing you into another dimension.
*remembers the months some skills take to finish.

 

[Tsuki Tanaka]

Very good review, I nevered played Eve, but my friend has. His comment about it was: "It's a very deep and complex game that requires a lot of skill to master." Which is basically what Mr Yahtzee said in his review.

I hope that was sarcasm, because I'm pretty sure I recall Yahtzee mentioning how incredibly boring this game is several different times.

Last time I checked, "Boring" =/= "deep and complex game." xD