Zero Punctuation: Portal 2

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Steve the Pocket

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Techno Squidgy said:
Steve the Pocket said:
That, and
the guy with the British accent becoming a villain
...something he's raged against very loudly in the past.
I assume you're referring to the Killzone 3 review? In that he was only referring to the troops having Cockney accents.
There have been others, though. I don't remember which ones they were. Wasn't there one where he said the British guy might as well be wearing a sign that says "I will die or turn evil"?
 

LostSwedishDildo

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Aug 12, 2009
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I'm a bit disappointed that you didn't review on the extremely clever writing for both campaign. While I agree that indeed the game puzzle cut with long sequence of shiny walls, the way the Glados act blew my mind over and over again. I really appreciated how vindicative she was toward the player (not the 1st portal protagonist, but YOU, the player).
Regarding the general critic you made however, like always, I laughed my ass off. You're a funny man, Yatzee.
 

srpilha

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Dec 24, 2008
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EcksTeaSea said:
Anyone else hear a donkey braying for about 5 minutes? Yeah, thats all I heard too.
Just 'cause you get good WiFi in the middle of your donkey farm doesn't mean you should abuse it.

The donkey, I mean.

(sorry, I know I shouldn't feed it, but that was too obvious to resist :p )
 

FamoFunk

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Mar 10, 2010
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Great review, I do love Portal 1 and 2, a lot. But I do not bang on about it.

I'm not sure what one I prefered. I love the way you can explore more in 2.

New meme's coming your way, too... SPAAAACCCCEEE!!! LEMONS!
 

MegaManOfNumbers

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Mar 3, 2010
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AAAH-

huh, Yahtzee ripping on a sequel. Not really surprising.

he sounds louder. Either he got a new mike or I turned the sound up too high.

*checks*

yep, turned up the sound.
 

SovietSecrets

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srpilha said:
EcksTeaSea said:
Anyone else hear a donkey braying for about 5 minutes? Yeah, thats all I heard too.
Just 'cause you get good WiFi in the middle of your donkey farm doesn't mean you should abuse it.

The donkey, I mean.

(sorry, I know I shouldn't feed it, but that was too obvious to resist :p )
Oh man you think I am a troll? Fantastic. Thank you for making my day.
 

LobsterFeng

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I was so hoping you would complain about the areas between the puzzles because I personally found those infuriating. Glad I'm not the only one.
 

metal mustache

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Amax29 said:
I had the same problem when I played co-op with two different people, it was fun with the first person but the second person was so slow to solve puzzles I just did it for him, it was a very frustrating experience for both of us.
yeah the puzzles arent quite as fun if you played the single player mode first, but then again the things glados says are much more comedic if you did.
 

Slenn

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Nov 19, 2009
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I still like both games. Neither is better than the other. Yahtzee said that the massive amount of moving around the facility was a bad thing, however I liked it because it fleshed out the Aperture Science facility in all its entirety. Portal was fun, but it was way too short after beating for the 3rd time.
 

CardinalPiggles

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thethingthatlurks said:
*sigh* I foresee 986.3 pages filled with nothing but cake jokes. Great review, but you're right, Portal has the most obnoxious fans of any game thus far.
trollpwner said:
Russian_Assassin said:
To be honest, I liked the second Portal better. Maybe because it let me explore the personality of my arch enemy some more, or maybe it was figuring out the story behind Aperture. All and all, I regard both Portals (the games, not the actual portals) as two of the best games I've played in my life.

Also, how could someone not like the turret opera?
I agree. This is the first time I have been really dissapointed with a ZP video. There really wasn't anything WRONG with portal 2, it was just DIFFERENT. So why did he complain because it wasn't small-scale? It was better in EVERY way!
the appeal for portal 1 for me was innovation, and just the sheer 'cuteness' of it.

portal 2 didnt have either feature, and in my opinion was trying too hard to be funny. the development should have been left upto the original minor team that valve recruited years ago.
 

metal mustache

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i don't understand why yahtzee didn't like the in between stages. You got to really think outside the box in those ones. I paticularly liked the turret line up one.

I can see why he wouldn't have liked some of them though. When wheatley threw me down the elevator shaft, i spent about 8 minutes looking up trying to find a portable surface in the distance, only to realize that one was just a few feet to my right behind a wire fence.

Edit spoiler also their totally was a reference to cake in that game! remember glados's 'trap'? on the fake door it clearly says 'glados emergency shutdown room and cake dispensery'
 

_tinned_magpie_

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Feb 19, 2010
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I'm glad you liked it Yahtzee, and you've got a point.

I've always thought that the problem with Portal 2 is that it lacks the slow burn of atmosphere and the sudden punch of realisation that the original did. That's not a criticism though, it's the sort of thing that can't be repeated. Now that we know what's going on: that the Apeture Science Facility isn't the clinical lab we first thought, the surprise is over and we're always going to be suspicious of it, always waiting for it to turn on us and go all sinister. It'll never hit us in the same way that the first playthrough of the first game did.

I did love the game though, and it's a good review. It was fair and made me giggle. Plus he's damn right: the fans drive me mad.
 

metal mustache

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Steve the Pocket said:
Very, VERY surprised he didn't complain at all about the shameless retconning of the first game. Given how he feels about shameless sequels, even if Portal 2 doesn't qualify as one by a wide margin, I would think yoinking away a happy ending in a patch, just so there can be a sequel, would be on his top-ten list of biggest dick moves a developer can pull.

That, and
the guy with the British accent becoming a villain
...something he's raged against very loudly in the past.
i thought he was alright with the main villian being british, but just not the smaller baddies.
cool i figured out how to do a spoiler warning thing!
 

Psycho78

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I didn't really like Portal. Yes, I said it. I really don't like puzzle games in general though.

I played the hell out of Half-Life and all the associated multiplayer addons (Team Fortress, CS, Firearms, etc.) However Valve seems to have lost me after HL2. HL2 was very late but a good game, but not so good that I ever bothered finishing it. TF2 was VERY late and I never could get over the fact they made it cartoony instead of realistic like those oh-so-tantalizing concept shots released about 10 years before the game actually came out.
 

Yureina

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May 6, 2010
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Nailed it. This is exactly what I have been saying about Portal 2 since it came out (in essence, at least). It's still a great game, but it wasn't quite as memorable as the first game and its replay value is... not very good.

Anyway, great review! ^_^
 

monkey_man

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TimeLord said:
No memes?

Well my response to that is Lemons and Spaaaaaaaaaaaace!
So much Space, need to see it all! *exhales excitedly* SPACE SPAAACE SPAAAAAAAACCCEE!!!

I was hoping he'd cite the spacecore anywhere. Love that thing.
 

Ipsen

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CardinalPiggles said:
thethingthatlurks said:
*sigh* I foresee 986.3 pages filled with nothing but cake jokes. Great review, but you're right, Portal has the most obnoxious fans of any game thus far.
trollpwner said:
Russian_Assassin said:
To be honest, I liked the second Portal better. Maybe because it let me explore the personality of my arch enemy some more, or maybe it was figuring out the story behind Aperture. All and all, I regard both Portals (the games, not the actual portals) as two of the best games I've played in my life.

Also, how could someone not like the turret opera?
I agree. This is the first time I have been really dissapointed with a ZP video. There really wasn't anything WRONG with portal 2, it was just DIFFERENT. So why did he complain because it wasn't small-scale? It was better in EVERY way!
the appeal for portal 1 for me was innovation, and just the sheer 'cuteness' of it.

portal 2 didnt have either feature, and in my opinion was trying too hard to be funny. the development should have been left upto the original minor team that valve recruited years ago.
Somewhat doubt that would fix much, CardinalPiggles. We're talking about a sequel here, not a brand new property. I can hardly imagine a sequel besting a well-recieved predecessor in terms of ingenuity or novelty (while still remaining a faithful continuation of the predecessor). You can, and should look at Portal 2 as its own game, but it IS Portal 2; the spirit, and some mechanics always travel from the original to the descendant.

EDIT: I WOULD love to be proven wrong about sequels here; feel free to refute in some way.

And trollpwner, Yahtzee ALWAYS complains in his videos; it is his MO. To give him credit, however, he has mentioned that the game is good (or at least, one you should not neglect, I believe); looking at Mr. Croshaw's track record, if he calls a game good, IT'S GOOD (at least, you'll most likely enjoy it).
 

SmilingKitsune

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While I loved Portal 2 I couldn't agree more with the complaint concerning the numerous gargantuan areas in which you spend upwards of ten minutes simply trying to find where in the world you're actually meant to be going.
It hurts the pacing a lot, and feels almost as though Valve were afraid people would complain if the game was too short, and so threw in a load of road-blocks to stall you.
 

ImBigBob

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Dec 24, 2008
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Yopaz said:
ImBigBob said:
I'm surprised you didn't mention the frequent and annoying loading screens.
You know if you play this game on a PC like you should that cuts loading times a lot, never had an issue with them.

Great review, I was surprised to see that he like it this much, I would even say it seemed like he loved it, just not as much as the first one.
All I have is a laptop, which can't run anything more advanced than Torchlight. For a game like Portal, it lags like hell, so I'm playing it on PS3, thank you very much.

Besides, Uncharted 2 was a hell of a lot better looking than Portal, and I don't think there was a loading screen in the entire game. Every new locale was completely seamless. Meanwhile, Portal 2 has you exploring interesting locales and just when you're getting interested, -LOADING-.