Zero Punctuation: S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Clear Sky

[LoganAsh]

Well, I found the final part hillarious and the review was really sound as well! Yes, S.T.A.L.K.E.R is bloody hard, it can make you irritated and certainly isn't for a casual play, but that is exactly why I love it.

I blacken my windows (damn you daylight) grab a few drinks and sad as it may sound, prepare myself for one of the most difficult and as a result, emmersive and realistic game experiences I've played! I love that you can be suddenly ambushed by enemies and rather than destroying them for daring to challenge you, as per usual FPS-style, you'll be forced to lay down some fire and escape, just clinging to life as bullets whistle past your head! Plus the land-scape is very well designed. The bleak and atmospheric scenary really makes it feel like some apocolyptic waste-land..

The bugs are a pain, that's true, but my suggestion is to resist buying it for a few months, then not only will the price have dropped, but the patches will be out and you can have a generally bug-free experience.

 

[GuerrillaClock]

Good work Yahtzee. After a mediocre few episodes Yahtzees last month or so has been great. Good stuff.

 

[ElArabDeMagnifico]

Alright, this one is my new favorite. A very inconsistent review but it was funny so I liked it.

 

[defcon 1]

So it's essentially the same game with all those oh so wonderful bugs included. Yahtzee implied that they didn't fix the walking problem where you have to walk across some land large enough to harbor multiple timezones with only a stamina system that only gets worse the heavier your load becomes. That immersion BS doesn't quite cut it for me since the enemy can take more hits than a pin cushion can take pins, the voice actors are few, the graphical glitches, a $1000+ computer in order to make it not look like shit, and when I start reading a book when traveling cross country.

I remember the first game released 5 patches and still couldn't fix all the bugs. Since this is essentially the same game with DX10 and two patches, do these guys just no know what they're doing?

 

[Hedberger]

@Triple G

If you buy it here's a link to the Redux forum

http://z4.invisionfree.com/STALKERRE/index.php?act=idx

Not for the faint of heart ^^

This is realism

 

[LoganAsh]

To WrongSprite, it's the prequel to the Original game, so you can play it without having played the one before. I'd still recommend it though, amazing game!

 

[MrBoBo]

yahtzee implied that they didn't fix the walking problem where you have to walk across some land large enough to harbor multiple timezones with only a stamina system that only gets worse the heavier your load becomes.

No, he didn't imply that as such, you can use a fast travel via a guide.

do these guys just no know what they're doing?

Whatever they are diong, it doesn't feel like the generic halo style fps out there. So obviosly not the same as everyone else.

 

[ssgt splatter]

i dont think they do know what they're doing defcon 1 but still it is fun to drop the nuclear bunker buster or the MOAB on the "poor" VZ or anyone else you've pissed off

 

[XT]

S.T.A.L.K.E.R. S.U.C.K.S.

you're bad at the shootan and you should feel bad.

 

[ssgt splatter]

i know i'm jumping the gun here, but i can't wait to see how yahtzee is going to attack Gears of War 2. If its anything like the COD 4 review it should be somewhat friendly/nice

 

[ElephantGuts]

Nice one. Though I feel I should at that policemen become a lot less angry when they are dead. Well, they don't show it as much anyway.

 

[Vromnir]

Lol, what?

I thought my computer crashed when he did the error thing. Anyone know how he did that?

 

[sky14kemea]

lmao

the end was fantastically funny XD
great review yahtzee, at least there is some laughter on the shitty horizon i call life

 

[Vromnir]

Ahh the crashing joke works every time.

SILENT HILL NEXT WEEK! WOO!

i didnt get the
"and whistled for a baboon" joke
maybe im internet deprived?
or was it just something random that yahtzee said after the "error"
I'm assuming its a reference though
he always makes references
or really funny metaphors

*Hits you on head with newspaper*
Bad kitty.

Wait wtf?

 

[SecretTacoNinja]

Ahh the crashing joke works every time.

SILENT HILL NEXT WEEK! WOO!

i didnt get the
"and whistled for a baboon" joke
maybe im internet deprived?
or was it just something random that yahtzee said after the "error"
I'm assuming its a reference though
he always makes references
or really funny metaphors

*Hits you on head with newspaper*
Bad kitty.

Wait wtf?

What?

 

[SeniorDingDong]

STALKER is based on an artsy Russian film about a mysterious zone that has a hidden room in it that fulfills a person's wishes. The whole thing is very philosophical and mostly involves 3 guys walking around Chernobyl's wasteland. The idea is that it's all a metaphor for Russia's collapsed attempt at being a super po-

GONZO!!!1!! GONZO BITCHES!!!! BAHAHAAHAHAHAH!!!!

And that artsy Russian movie is based on an artsy Russian book.

Both are great to read/watch btw...

 

[ckam]

"Angry policemen are en route and resistance will only make them angrier." ìf-ing hilarious. This totally brightened my day, thanks Yahtzee. Can't wait for the Homecoming review (which ironically is happening at my place, too).

 

[Psychedeliasmith]

Ha, I loved this one. But I fear the review of Homecoming. I am *almost* determined to buy it, and the (inevitably evil?) review from Yahtzee might push me towards the sensible option of ignoring it (or maybe just renting it.) My expectations aren't terribly high because I know I can be spoonfed a lot of identikit pap labelled 'Silent Hill' and still be satisfied, but having the spirit of Yahtzee making some horribly apt quip about how rubbish it is could ruin it for me forever.

Oh my god. I have no opinions of my own any more.

 

[guyy]

*BBZT*...and whistled for a baboon!

Are you really supposed to pronounce each letter in S.T.A.L.K.E.R.? Because that's just silly.

 

[internutt]

Hilarious. I now want some baked beans...