Zero Punctuation: The Conduit

[sazzrah]

I'm going to take a wild stab here and suggest that he didn't particularly like Conduit. Ahem.

This really doesn't bode well for the future; if Nintendo - who have had years now of attempting to perfect the motion control technology - cannot produce a good gaming experience for a more "hard core" non-Wii Sports crowd, then it hardly makes me excited for Natal or the PS3 wands. If this is the direction gaming really wants to go then I genuinely worry for it.

Here's hoping all this motion controlled crap goes away before the next console generation.

 

[abort_user]

this is the review ive been waiting for but didnt know i was waiting for.

im surprised i didnt hear more about the generic (since thats why i lost hope in the game and sold my wii). but i didnt know about the other things so they were probably more glaring. its also nice to be reminded of why wii fps's dont work well and thats turning.

 

[vikeif]

I really hate that you can't look up!!!!...cuntholes

bet megaman felt the same way.

Anywho, I tried it before. I didn't like it, mostly cause on the beeping testicle and the fucking control.

 

[Squilookle]

Since when has Secretary been obscure?
I like the Conduit myself. It's a STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. Motion sensing should open up new, unexplored avenues for gaming (specifically FPS gaming), and, if the Conduit can say anything, it's that the Wii can be successful with the FPS.

Agreed. It's important that it's trying to find a new way of controlling a shooter well, and the amount of customisation you can have with the controls shows they went to the effort. So it was generally a failure, but it's still important, see? Like Mirror's Edge was.

 

[Rigs83]

I was not planning on buying The Conduit since I skipped every single console Big N has made since the NES. I think they rushed the Wii out before they actually figured out how to get the controls to actually work that's why they had to add another adapter to get it to sort of work right.

I also think it is wrong to make Palin jokes because now your just beating horse giblets.

 

[tirone231]

So The Conduit promises good graphics, and thinks it'll be the first game to use the Wii-mote somewhat well? I would have thought that a veteran gamer would be able to see straight through that. I suspect you only played it because you enjoy eviscerating every serious game that comes out for the Wii.

That, or because it's his job to review games as they come.

It was an okay review, but the Palin bashing wore pretty thin, pretty quick. Even then, it wasn't very funny.

It is funny to people not in the US.
Sort of like a funny car crash, if it happened in a completely moronic way it's hilarious to look at it on YouTube from the comfort of your living room, but not when you're in the car.

Actually, it's pretty funny for us in the U.S. as well, except for those who get tired of politics. I love all the Republican jokes Yathzee uses, these Palin ones topping the charts, however, if he wanted to go after Democrats, I'd probably laugh at those jokes too.

Good review Yathzee, thanks for your honest, unadulterated opinion

 

[CenturionRyan]

Yahtzee's accent is really prominent in this one, I thought.

I'm still thinking of giving The Counduit a go, though. But that's only because I haven't turned my Wii on in about a month.

 

[pyror]

nice review as always
liked the "and naturlich" since I'm from germany - no i'm not a nazi

BDEEP BDEEP so far

 

[lee1287]

makes me happy =]

 

[ghalkhsdkssakgh]

Wow another Wii zp review and yet my Wii will stay dusty.

Also I wonder since he hasn't mentioned it does Yahtzee know that Prince of Persia SoT is now becoming a movie because I think he'd be "overjoyed" to hear it.

Spoiler

a Prince of Persia movie? By Disney? Dear god, Repent! Repent!

*ahem* anyway, yes, great review, well up to your usual standards. I never planned to get the conduit, having abandoned the Wii a while ago. Glad to see I'm not missing out.

BDEEP BDEEP BDEEP BDEEP BDEEP!

 

[Zephyr892]

Nintendo alienated their longstanding fanbase with the Wii. They even said something very similar to the fact they are no longer catering to those that have been with them since the beginning etc but to the broad family etc.

Yes their marketing rocked and is why the Wii is dominated in SALES.
Does Sales = Good Console/Game? No. No it doesn't.

What I will share with everyone is the information that the IGN reviewer for the game, Matt something or other, was not only credited in the game under the title "Special Thanks". He was paid to review the game well...

 

[thetragicclown]

Linear levels packed with conga-lines of bland monsters? Not able to look up? Unimaginative weapons? Sounds like every third-rate FPS (or "Doom-clone" as we called them then) released on the PC back in the mid-90s.

The more things change...

 

[Cogzwell]

Well at this point any hopes for a good Wii game are lost, and people just don't understand that, Get rid of the wii and all its stupid fanboys who think they're gamers!...And Sara Palin too while we're on the subject

 

[aeroz]

Good video though I do not get why during his previous E3 review "Nintendo remember its a video game company and not Fisher-Price" which I took as meaning "stop making so many casual gimmicky games and make some for the hardcore crowd", that is a perfectly valid viewpoint, but then when he reviews a Wii game aimed at the hardcore crowd he rags on it for attempting to do what he said he wanted.

It seems horribly hipocritical to say you dislike the wii for focusing on casual games, then say they shouldn't bother with hardcore games.

Yes I suppose you could say the issue is with the concept of the Wii, that it was a failed attempt at trying something new. Except he also has said he loves inovation and attempts at something new. Which contradicts this alternate reason for disliking it

 

[Xanthious]

Nothing brightens my Wednesdays more than seeing a Wii game up for slaughter on ZP. It seems he really hates the Wii about as much as I do. On a totally unrelated note who the hell is the Curly haired fella with the blank look he uses in most all of his reviews?

 

[phi161]

Another great review, but don't you think its about time Wii games stopped getting reviewed?

We all know the majority of Wii games aren't any thing to sing and dance about, and know they will have 'crappy' graphics which are no where near as good as the PS3 or Xbox360's graphics, that goes with out saying by now.

 

[Whistler777]

Wow, I had no idea The Conduit was that lackluster. Now when my friends use it to defend the Wii, it'll be another thing for me to shoot down. Go elitism!

 

[Gildan Bladeborn]

Considering the less angry and sarcastic reviews I've seen for this title essentially stressed that the sole reason anyone should ever consider purchasing Conduit would be if they only have a Wii and thus can't play FPS titles on anything else, I'd say Yahtzee was probably not exaggerating much. Good for a Wii game indeed.

 

[jacobschndr]

I like the sarah palin jokes in that review funny as always