Zero Punctuation: The Conduit

[CrafterMan]

Can somone please explain to me why the wii isnt a hardcore console and how the ps3 and 360 aparently are. Is the only thing that makes a hardcore console is graphics than shouldnt every hardcore gamer have a pc. And if you dont remember Nintendo's last hardcore console didnt sell well at all. You shouldnt blame them for trying to change the market in their favour.

Well hardcore is a pretty stupid way of putting it isn't it haha. I automatically see a 12 year old nerd specimen when I hear that word. But in this case graphics are always going to look worse on the Wii, that's a fact. Mistakingly they focused on making The Conduit graphically pleasing, but failed at it because there are other next gen consoles that look far better. They should of focused on the storyline more.

-Joe

 

[jak1165]

Yahtzee should stop reviewing Wii games. Its obvious that he just sucks at them. I normally agree with what he says almost verbatim and would gladly offer mouth sex to him if prepositioned. He gets major points in my book for the unadulterated love he gives to the Prince of Persia series and Saints Row....but the Wii bashing is a bit ridiculous.

I guess all the "hardcore gamers" in this thread are angry that the "kiddy" system with all the shovelware outsells their precious PS3s and 360s combined by like 8-to-1

 

[bodyklok]

First 3 comments were funny as always.

I think they are trying to get banned now.

I don't know, I think creatiwe and bor3ds0uls mod wrath wasn't intentional, not as intentional as 'LOL FIRST BAN ME' anyway.

Their posts were just zero content, but this is a ZP thread so who expects content?

 

[Pebkac]

Can somone please explain to me why the wii isnt a hardcore console and how the ps3 and 360 aparently are. Is the only thing that makes a hardcore console is graphics than shouldnt every hardcore gamer have a pc. And if you dont remember Nintendo's last hardcore console didnt sell well at all. You shouldnt blame them for trying to change the market in their favour.

It's not the graphics it's the games. Most Wii games target casual gamers. Most Xbox 360 & PS3 games target fat 35 year olds living in their mother's basements and 12 year olds.

We can, will, and should make fun of them for making a shitty console.

 

[Wingmna]

whats up with reviewing all bad wii games? Little King's Story, Dawn of Discovery, Excitebots, Punch-Out!! are all recent, unique and good Wii games, even though they lack the 'hardcore' factor that normally involves generic FPS gameplay with big suits they are still much better then crap like the Conduit. Otherwise there are also multiplats like Tiger Woods 10 and Pro Evo Soccer 09 which preform much better on the wii, this isn't a including a whole lot of other games of course, e.g. WiiWare ones.

MadWorld and now this? Just seems like you are purposely choosing over-hyped and generally bad Wii games on purpose.

 

[Razorback0z]

Ok jokes over... Review Evil Genius or apologise for mentioning it as being a game you might like and getting up the hopes of lamers like me who thought it was a good game.

Consider yourself told...

Oh and good review...

 

[Pebkac]

Agreed. I make fun of PS3 fanboys all the time. Lulz no gud gaemz

Strange. In your last post you seemed like a Wii fanboy.

 

[Knight Templar]

Agreed. I make fun of PS3 fanboys all the time. Lulz no gud gaemz

Thats not exactly true anymore is it?

MGS4, LBP and all the games that are also on 360 give the PS3 a very good lineup. I only mention MGS4 and LBP because I have not, or have only briefly played the other flagship PS3 titles and can't say if they are good or not.

But don't troll, its not accepted in these froums.

 

[Worm104]

Can somone please explain to me why the wii isnt a hardcore console and how the ps3 and 360 aparently are. Is the only thing that makes a hardcore console is graphics than shouldnt every hardcore gamer have a pc. And if you dont remember Nintendo's last hardcore console didnt sell well at all. You shouldnt blame them for trying to change the market in their favour.

It's not the graphics it's the games. Most Wii games target casual gamers. Most Xbox 360 & PS3 games target fat 35 year olds living in their mother's basements and 12 year olds.

We can, will, and should make fun of them for making a shitty console.

If all these casual games are so bad why are Sony and Microsoft so keen to jump on the bandwagon. There are some good games on the wii but it's commercial success means more games are created for it so less are good percentage wise.

There are also so "good" looking games coming up including Murumasa: Demon Blade, Capcom vs Tatsunoko, Red Steel 2 and Monster Hunter 3. Granted they don't look as good as they would on another system but all 360 and PS3 games would look better on a top end PC.

 

[Pebkac]

MadWorld and now this? Just seems like you are purposely choosing over-hyped and generally bad Wii games on purpose.

Over-hyped and bad describes a lot of games Yahtzee reviews.

 

[Johnnyallstar]

FFFFF UNDERNEATH A KILLING MOON
Oh geeze I love you for that reference

Think a bad choice in story for most FPS games in general is pretty much any type of government conspiracy based one. Most often, the story is either very predictable or preachy.. or both..

I'm in that same boat for the UKM reference, I used to play those games all the time.

I am actually surprised that nintendo hasn't gone and put out a newer console, or started showing off the next generation console that has a serious graphics system on the inside. Lets face it, graphics aren't everything, but even a moderate level of graphics are required to help create the immersion effect.

Putting gamecube level processing into a machine that will have to work harder because of a more complex control system was a bad idea. I applaud how well they have done with the motion controls so far, but really, they need to start caring a little bit more about graphics. It doesn't HAVE to have the raw processing power to create constant photo-realistic imagery for games, but at least enough to not look well dated.

 

[jak1165]

Agreed. I make fun of PS3 fanboys all the time. Lulz no gud gaemz

Strange. In your last post you seemed like a Wii fanboy.

I assure you, I am not. If anything, I'm specifically a Brawl fanboy.I love me some Smash Brothers. I won't pretend otherwise. The only other function my Wii console serves is to play OoT and Streets of Rage on Virtual console.

I just can't stand the condescending tone the "hardcore" gamers take towards anyone who dares voice anything resembling support of Nintendo. Its a sure sign of Living-in-Parents-basement-itits

 

[jericu]

It was an okay review, but the Palin bashing wore pretty thin, pretty quick. Even then, it wasn't very funny.

yeah he needs to bash her more and harder! I thought it was hilarious, then again she is short of a trained monkey.

Do you have any idea what the phrase, "Pretty thin, pretty quick," means? It means it was stupid and repetitive, and there should have been less of it.

 

[jak1165]

Agreed. I make fun of PS3 fanboys all the time. Lulz no gud gaemz

Thats not exactly true anymore is it?

MGS4, LBP and all the games that are also on 360 give the PS3 a very good lineup. I only mention MGS4 and LBP because I have not, or have only briefly played the other flagship PS3 titles and can't say if they are good or not.

But don't troll, its not accepted in these froums.

The fact that the PS3 and 360 share like 90% of their library is not a good thing, at least for the PS3. There are, in fact, good games on the PS3. But you can find ALL of them on the 360. Fallout, GTAIV, Madden, Call of Duty, etc.

Yeah, I'll take my cheaper console

 

[Pebkac]

If all these casual games are so bad why are Sony and Microsoft so keen to jump on the bandwagon. There are some good games on the wii but it's commercial success means more games are created for it so less are good percentage wise.

There are also so "good" looking games coming up including Murumasa: Demon Blade, Capcom vs Tatsunoko, Red Steel 2 and Monster Hunter 3. Granted they don't look as good as they would on another system but all 360 and PS3 games would look better on a top end PC.

I didn't say they were all bad. If you must know why so many are bad, it's partly because casual gamers don't spend as much time playing them as hardcore gamers and thus have a lower requirements, but mostly because the games are made by small inexperienced development teams, and generally pumped out as fast as possible, as cheap as possible.

There aren't more games on the Wii. Not unless you count the wii-ware re-releases and GCN games. Having less good games percentage-wise is just bad.

Top-end PC gaming graphics doesn't have anything to do with this.

 

[jak1165]

whats up with reviewing all bad wii games? Little King's Story, Dawn of Discovery, Excitebots, Punch-Out!! are all recent, unique and good Wii games, even though they lack the 'hardcore' factor that normally involves generic FPS gameplay with big suits they are still much better then crap like the Conduit. Otherwise there are also multiplats like Tiger Woods 10 and Pro Evo Soccer 09 which preform much better on the wii, this isn't a including a whole lot of other games of course, e.g. WiiWare ones.

MadWorld and now this? Just seems like you are purposely choosing over-hyped and generally bad Wii games on purpose.

Well, if he reviewed GOOD games, there wouldn't be much of a point. He's a game critic. Hard to critique something that doesn't have many flaws. And when he does do a "good" game, the review tends to be short, for the above reason. I.E. Bioshock

 

[Lord_Seth]

I've always been a bit perplexed that people who slam on the Wii for not having a decent library of games then go and talk about how developers shouldn't make things for it. So they complain about an aspect of a console, then turn around and say "well, you shouldn't be trying to improve it"?

The Phoenix Wright series, The new Fire Emblem game, the upcomig Kingdom Hearts game, TWEWY, and many other games that I can't think of off the top of my head. There's plenty of great games for the DS. If you can only find edumacational games, then you aren't looking hard enough.

If we exclude remakes (e.g. Kirby Superstar Ultra, Chrono Trigger, Super Mario 64 DS), there's also New Super Mario Bros., Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time, Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story (upcoming), Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars, Contra 4, and both of the Advance Wars games for the DS (Dual Strike and Days of Ruin).

DS games I haven't played personally but have heard decent things about are the three Castlevania games for it (Dawn of Sorrow, Order of Ecclesia, Portrait of Ruin), Infinite Space (upcoming), Dragon Quest V, Sonic Rush and Sonic Rush Adventure, Trauma Center: Under the Knife 1 & 2, and more.

I can understand criticizing the Wii's library of games (almost all of the games worth playing are first party), but the DS has a pretty good library of first and third party games.

 

[Knight Templar]

Agreed. I make fun of PS3 fanboys all the time. Lulz no gud gaemz

Thats not exactly true anymore is it?

MGS4, LBP and all the games that are also on 360 give the PS3 a very good lineup. I only mention MGS4 and LBP because I have not, or have only briefly played the other flagship PS3 titles and can't say if they are good or not.

But don't troll, its not accepted in these froums.

The fact that the PS3 and 360 share like 90% of their library is not a good thing, at least for the PS3.

That doesn't make sense, exclusives are a bad thing, I want to play Heavy Rain when it comes out but can't, I bet somebody wishes they had L4D but couldn't buy it because they didn't own the right console. As a consumer exclusives are very bad, I like that they give a console identity but I'd rather be able to play any game.

But you can find ALL of them on the 360.

I can't play LBP on my 360 now can I? Unless you have played all PS3 exclusives you're being stupid to say such a thing.

 

[Deleric]

The maps are bleh. The aiming system's pretty cool. Story is bleh. Multiplayer is buggy as shit for me.

 

[mokes310]

LOL a the Sarah Palin jokes

I enjoyed couting how many there actually were. New found respect for Yahtzee's intellect after a couple of them.

Spot on with the Palin jokes Yahtzee, spot on!

A side note, for all of five people who actually know what I'm talking about...if Yahtzee shaved his chin, took off the hat, and threw on a pair of aviators, he'd look a hell of a lot like Chopper