Zero Punctuation: Wii Sports Resort
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
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I always thought the Wii remote worked like a sensor stick with a angry cat on the end of it, not very good that is. I guess I have no room to talk, I don't own a Wii anymore. But I think Wii Sports Resort is just Nintendo milking as much money out of the idea that they can like Zelda or Mario
Do you people who criticize the Wii stop to realize how stupid you sound? It ISN'T NINTENDO'S FAULT most of the games on its console are crappy. Blame *game developers* for exploiting a popular console and creating cheap and easy games to make a buck. Not only that, but crappy games aren't unique to Wii...
Secondly, Nintendo's first-party (and second-party) games are awesome. If you don't like Zelda or Mario Galaxy or Smash Brothers or Donkey Kong or the upcoming Metroid 3 or Animal Crossing, then you simply don't like games period, or you prefer looking cool to actually having fun.
Thirdly, what's with this "Nintendo milking money with sequels" idea? Have you ever heard of:
Halo 1-3
Final Fantasy 1-12
GTA 1-4
Call of Duty 1-4
God of War 1-3
Gears of War 1-2
Doom 1-4
Mortal Kombat/Street Fighter 1-4
Tekken 1-6
Tomb Raider 1-9
Madden Every Year
Tony Hawk 1-Forever
Uncharted 1-2?
Yeah, how dare Nintendo release a sequel to Wii Sports... and how dare people get "suckered into" buying it and "fooled" into having fun...
Secondly, Nintendo's first-party (and second-party) games are awesome. If you don't like Zelda or Mario Galaxy or Smash Brothers or Donkey Kong or the upcoming Metroid 3 or Animal Crossing, then you simply don't like games period, or you prefer looking cool to actually having fun.
Thirdly, what's with this "Nintendo milking money with sequels" idea? Have you ever heard of:
Halo 1-3
Final Fantasy 1-12
GTA 1-4
Call of Duty 1-4
God of War 1-3
Gears of War 1-2
Doom 1-4
Mortal Kombat/Street Fighter 1-4
Tekken 1-6
Tomb Raider 1-9
Madden Every Year
Tony Hawk 1-Forever
Uncharted 1-2?
Yeah, how dare Nintendo release a sequel to Wii Sports... and how dare people get "suckered into" buying it and "fooled" into having fun...
Uh, technically it is. Game developers make the games for the console, then Nintendo releases them. CLEARLY they are at fault for distributing varied quality video games that hold no interest for the more dedicated gamer society. As for a sequel to Wiisports, you might as well just turn off the console and jog vigorously around your block for a good half an hour, risking midnight stabs (if you're into midnight exercise), and it'd STILL be more fun than flicking your wrist at a TV.BowieZ said:
Clearly, Nintendo is not intent on pleasing hardcore gamers such as Yahtzee (Yes, I'm a bit of a bootlicker. Quiet you). I mean, he even clearly stated that - though in a very convoluted and amusing fashion. So yes, it IS Nintendo's fault for not catering to the mature audiences as much as they are to the young family/'recreational' gamers.
Do you know that all those games and their sequels you just listed all have something to do with violence and at LEAST a decent amount of hand-eye coordination/button-mashing coherency? At least Microsoft and Playstation understand a little more of what their target audience wants, as opposed to Nintendo, who attempts to - and fails - to capture the attention of Microsoft and Playstation's target audience - namely, men/boys who want to do manly things like shooting things that squirt red stuff when riddled with holes you make, with as little effort as possible (and looking as little like a doofus as they can)
Let me start of by saying I competely agree with you with whole milking sequal stupidity talk.BowieZ said:
However Nintendo have contributed a lot to their crappy shallow game collection. No I'm not talking about the Mii games so much but the Donkey Kong games, Links Crossbow Training, Warioware Smooth Moves, etc. They gave the company's the rights to make these awful games and then published it themselves. It's like they give these developers too much exposure, not letting others evolve into something awesome.
Now with the first party titles that you mentioned, well thats basically it except you probably can take off Donkey Kong, Metroid 3 and Animal Crossing since they really aren't what most people bought the Wii for. Also Mario Kart Wii is a downgrade of the great Mario Kart 64 and since HAL Labratory has dumbed-down the gameplay in Brawl, a lot of fans were very very disappointed with it.
You probably could add No More Hero's and Pikmin 2 to the Wii's best games but thats about it, they weren't really the main appeal. So yeah, there really isn't all that much I can call great but at least all the complaints have made Nintendo get to work on some more first party titles, hopefully they will turn out great.
Awesome review as always, although as a fencer I should probably be insulted... never mind, I'm sure that comment was directed towards all the stuck up foil and epee fencers...although I'm also sure that no one on this site will get that reference. Sabre ftw!
^ But your criticisms apply to Sony and Microsoft too... they all licence a lot of **** to be made, they all want to make a profit... but just because Nintendo's crappy games look "cartoony" while MS's look "hardcore" because of some nondescript grainy, bloody violent appearance, Nintendo cops the flak?
By the way, Nintendo has many more first-party franchises than MS or Sony, so I'm not sure what your point is unless you're blaming them for being so successful that people aren't interested in other titles... so what's the problem? Blame the masses for liking the status quo? Well Nintendo totally upended the status quo with the Wii controls -- whether you like it or not -- so you kinda need to give them some credit.
And Mario Kart Wii is awesome. I don't get what you can dislike about it... it has Bowser's Castle, DK's Jungle Parkway, Mario Raceway and Sherbet Land from N64 plus 16 new tracks... plus a whole lot of new stuff/characters/bikes/abilities/power-ups/online functionality/steering wheel?
By the way, Nintendo has many more first-party franchises than MS or Sony, so I'm not sure what your point is unless you're blaming them for being so successful that people aren't interested in other titles... so what's the problem? Blame the masses for liking the status quo? Well Nintendo totally upended the status quo with the Wii controls -- whether you like it or not -- so you kinda need to give them some credit.
And Mario Kart Wii is awesome. I don't get what you can dislike about it... it has Bowser's Castle, DK's Jungle Parkway, Mario Raceway and Sherbet Land from N64 plus 16 new tracks... plus a whole lot of new stuff/characters/bikes/abilities/power-ups/online functionality/steering wheel?
"Who wants to be a fencer?, a bunch of hoity twoity cunts with sives on their faces!" the best quote of the review(in my opinion). Though the wii bowling one comes second.
Funny review, even though I completely disagreed with it.
Seriously, anyone that thinks there's no strategy to the fencing game just sucks at it. It makes me wonder if the people who say that actually played against someone who knew what they were doing, or if they just went up against the computer/their 5 year old kid brother.
Seriously, anyone that thinks there's no strategy to the fencing game just sucks at it. It makes me wonder if the people who say that actually played against someone who knew what they were doing, or if they just went up against the computer/their 5 year old kid brother.
See this is where I think you are missing the point of the comments here. Blanks said that Sony started the motion thing with the Eyetoy, while it was more successful, they certainly didn't come up with the idea. That idea was tried on the Nintendo system years ago which was the only point I made. You are the one trying to show off how much time you spend on wikipedia by adding that it was a flop, like that is relevant to either of our comments. Just because someone tried something and it failed doesn't mean anything, they still did it first. Heck, it could be argued that the Eyetoy is not a motion controller as much as video recognition device. In that case the Nintendo system still wins for having the first motion controller and the first successful one.runtheplacered said:
I honestly haven't had much trouble with my Wii as far as motion controls (other than the pointer going berserk and aiming everywhere except where I wanted it to, but apparently sunlight can do that to the sensors...).
Yahtzee can say whatever he wants about the Wii. I like the Wii (kinda losing faith in it due to the lack of games that are actually GOOD, but w/e), but I still think his Wii reviews are fucking funny.
Some people like the Wii, some people don't. That's how the world works. If somebody made something that everybody liked, the universe would be ripped apart because something that's completely impossible actually happened.
Yahtzee can say whatever he wants about the Wii. I like the Wii (kinda losing faith in it due to the lack of games that are actually GOOD, but w/e), but I still think his Wii reviews are fucking funny.
Some people like the Wii, some people don't. That's how the world works. If somebody made something that everybody liked, the universe would be ripped apart because something that's completely impossible actually happened.
It would appear that the less funny I find Yahtzee, the less I care about his opinion. Granted, it's his primary purpose to be a synical bastard, but now that he apparently avoids praising pretty much anything and everything, it's starting to feel like he doesn't like computer games full stop and I just can't relate.
I got Wii Sports Resort the other day (the first Wii game I've bothered getting in a long time) and think it's pretty good. The motion plus is definitely a step in the right drection and, contrary to the review, the sword-fighting is one of the best games. Tennis is way more technical than its predecessor, and golf is too. Bowling is... well, bowling is reviewed fairly.
What the Wii really needs is a decent light-saber game to utilise the new responsiveness...!!
I got Wii Sports Resort the other day (the first Wii game I've bothered getting in a long time) and think it's pretty good. The motion plus is definitely a step in the right drection and, contrary to the review, the sword-fighting is one of the best games. Tennis is way more technical than its predecessor, and golf is too. Bowling is... well, bowling is reviewed fairly.
What the Wii really needs is a decent light-saber game to utilise the new responsiveness...!!