Zero Punctuation: Wii Sports Resort

[Teh_Doomage]

Very good points.

While I do not own a Wii and will never own a Wii, I did almost get one for House of the Dead: Overkill and No More Heroes. The whole system just seems to be a one trick pony.

Why would someone want to virtual bowl? Ok, you won't make an ass of yourself, but that can be half the fun, getting your friends together, get a few pints, and throw a heavy ball towards pins.

Repackaging some of the same games that was originally in Wii Sports with only a slight locale change and the added line of code for WiiMotionPlus is just a nice way of saying, "Hey! We just added this feature, most games already can use it, but we are too lazy to replace the original copy of Wii Sports to use it, so you have to BUY another copy of the game to get full functionality from it."

Smooth move Nintendo.

 

[Titanium Dragon]

I think it is valid for people to complain about his constant ragging on the Wii; it is the most popular console (and therefore the most people own it) which means that a good portion of his audience is going to possess it. Thing is, he DOES complain about everything, so really getting upset about it is stupid. Its not like he's a "real" game reviewer anyway, he's just a guy who produces entertainment using the facsimile of a game review. Of course, there aren't really any "real" game reviewers, given the rest are just advertising the games and getting paid for it

As for the game itself, I've owned it since it came out and I enjoy it quite a bit. Golf hasn't really changed a whole lot, but it is still enjoyable, and new games are, by and large, better than the games in the original Wii Sports (which makes sense given the game actually has a price tag independent of the console). They are pretty much "pick them up and play them" type games, rather than games you'd actually invest yourself seriously in, but they're enjoyable enough to while away hours of fun and golf, at least, is fun multiplayer.

The complaints about there not being force feedback are to some degree justified, but the lack of it doesn't render the Wii Motion Plus useless or unusable, and hopefully people will, you know, actually use the console's capabilities in a non-gimmicky way.

The reality is that the Wii is fine, and motion sensing is, likewise, fine (though the original motion sensing was very limited, and therefore, rather dodgy - the IR camera works great though). The problem is not that there is motion sensing, but that people feel the need to randomly throw it in for no reason. Just because a feature is present doesn't mean you absolutely HAVE to use it. Some might complain that, if your game doesn't use the motion sensing, why is it on the Wii? To answer that question, why are games which don't use all twenty thousand buttons on the PS3 or XBOX 360?

If you don't have a good reason to use motion sensing, you shouldn't. But if you DO, then why not?

And maybe with this new attachment we will actually get a swordfighting game that is worth something. One can only hope.

We can also hope that a lot of games won't be given unnecessarily stupid controls to use this, but we all know that will happen regardless because game developers are retarded.

 

[Wolcik]

Very nicly done. I've never played Wii yet, but I'm planing to changing that one day - now that the controlers are fixed a little XD
I'd also liked to see something diffrent than motion sensor because I don't intent to embarasse myself just to learn how to play a game...

 

[KirbySupremus]

Controller made of fruit.....awesome

 

[Titanium Dragon]

Wolcik, I hate to break this to you, but...

You're playing a video game. You don't play video games to look cool, because, frankly, it doesn't matter whether you're using the Wiimote or playing with a controller, you simply are not going to look cool while playing them. Have you ever watched a video of people playing video games? Or heck, just watched someone? They look pretty dumb.

Plus, seriously, who exactly are you playing video games in front of who is going to make fun of you flailing around?

And, if all else fails, the cordless wiimote makes a great projectile weapon.

 

[Pebkac]

I think it is valid for people to complain about his constant ragging on the Wii; it is the most popular console (and therefore the most people own it) which means that a good portion of his audience is going to possess it. Thing is, he DOES complain about everything, so really getting upset about it is stupid.

Most owned console; least amount of games. This means that when Yahtzee finally reviews a Wii game all the Wii fanboys get a chance to get all uppity. It also means they are more likely to own it, whereas fanboys of other consoles are more divided.

 

[flaming_squirrel]

Why is it that Wii fanboys remind me so much of Mac owners?

They both get hilariously defensive when their precious little white box is insulted (cant hurt it's widdle feelings now can we?) and the companies making the products are money grabbing bastards who will mercilessly exploit their fans to the full extent possible (which the owners seem completely oblivious to). I suppose the main difference is the market share, with the Wii sadly doing very well for itself, for better or worse Microsoft are the most reasonable alternative for both..

 

[Communist partisan]

I was impressed by the wii than it came out after a week I thinked it was shit so pure shit that it's shining so this was lovley to hear about it!

 

[Stabby Joe]

Why is it that Wii fanboys remind me so much of Mac owners?

They both get hilariously defensive when their precious little white box is insulted (cant hurt it's widdle feelings now can we?) and the companies making the products are money grabbing bastards who will mercilessly exploit their fans to the full extent possible (which the owners seem completely oblivious to). I suppose the main difference is the market share, with the Wii sadly doing very well for itself, for better or worse Microsoft are the most reasonable alternative for both..

Except a Mac has a lot of pros to fall back on in an argument... the Wii not so much.

 

[EvilZim]

I'm glad to see Yahtzee stand his ground and not bend to the whines of the public. Staying true to your roots is the key to keeping your core fan base who are largely hardcore gamers. Very amusing review.

 

[flaming_squirrel]

Except a Mac has a lot of pros to fall back on in an argument... the Wii not so much.

I'm not sure if being a lump of overpriced 'trendy' crap counts as a pro.

Oh wait it does have some good video/audio editing software, but that's it.

 

[Lord_Seth]

Why is it that Wii fanboys remind me so much of Mac owners?

They both get hilariously defensive when their precious little white box is insulted (cant hurt it's widdle feelings now can we?) and the companies making the products are money grabbing bastards who will mercilessly exploit their fans to the full extent possible (which the owners seem completely oblivious to).

How is that any different from Microsoft, Sony, or companies in general, quite honestly?

 

[WendelI]

Hey You know the Motion sensing now actually works... but now that Sony and Xbox are doing something similar. it doesn't look as fun any more to have an accurate wii. >.> Well no more heroes 2 better come out with motion plus support

Also is the controller made of fruit a gay joke? I'm just asking >.>

 

[Thomas101]

This is a great review. I showed it to my mate but he is convinced he does not look like a retard when he play the Wii.

 

[duchaked]

hahaha that was hilarious! I was cracking up the whole time (a bit more than say in the last few videos but still)

 

[Stelman257]

but any way it was good but why dident he review bowling well never know

Because a franchise that involves shooting people over and over again is worthy but a franchise that incorporates shooting pins again in its sequel is a horrible, fun-less cash cow.

No because it's the same goddamn thing. At least shooting games TRY to change the pace a bit. Wii Bowling remained identical in both games.

 

[xdirtyboots]

sarcasm is a nice fit for yahtzee. i hope this is a new trend

 

[The Atheist Knight]

sarcasm is a nice fit for yahtzee. i hope this is a new trend

This is the first time you've heard Yahtzee being sarcastic?

Anyway I liked the review because he called it for what it is. A weak game that only someone between the 3-11 age group would think is innotave.

 

[Boaal]

As a wii owner I have to agree.
I saw wii sports resort when it was being advertised and groaned at how bloody unoriginal it was.
Wii sports was an interesting little thing to start the whole platform off on, but ... no. It should have stayed that way. Hell at least mario party had good call for reeling out innumerable and aggravating mini games... even after... where did they get up to?

Thing I notice though, is that this was a bloody easy target. Seriously - who didn't think this was a gimmicky pile of crap when they saw it?
Maybe next time he'll review an actual game...