Zombie Apocalypse scenario: What will you do?

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Heronblade

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Apr 12, 2011
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Yes, this topic again, it hasn't been done on this forum in a while though, so I thought it might be time to bring it up once more.

Simple enough question, you're on your own or in a small group to begin with, can go anywhere, and can acquire pretty much any real world item you can carry and/or fit into a road vehicle of your choice. What do you take, and what do you do?




For me:

Combat Gear (to keep on hand, not use all at once rambo style)
-Riot gear with full body knife resistant armor, tower shield included. Actually, a modernized version of metal plate might work better, but finding a set made from non traditional lightweight materials is incredibly tough, and the older style is far too cumbersome, even with training.
-AK-47 tactical AKM with grenade launcher attachment. Variable fire high powered assault weapon usable at ranges comparable to some dedicated sniper rifles. In some ways more importantly, it is incredibly easy to maintain and find replacement parts for, and uses a standard 7.62 round. I actually would prefer the M-16 or XM8, but they don't fare as well in a situation with poor levels of regular maintenance.
-USAS-12 combat shotgun with drum magazines. 12 gauge auto/semiauto short barreled shotgun with a 20 round capacity, simple magazine reload, and relatively low recoil.
-.44 magnum desert eagle. Few handguns have the same kind of stopping power as this thing. Kicks like a mule though.

Other weapons
-heavy hatchet or small woodcutter's axe. doubles as an incredibly functional survival tool. It isn't ideal for all cases, but a machete doesn't quite have the force necessary to sever limbs reliably, and I'm more likely to hurt myself than the zombies attempting to wield a sword.
-111 FCNS, .308 scoped rifle, mainly for hunting game, the AK would work fine, but is just a wee bit overpowered for a deer or elk
-Browning 22LR, low caliber rifle for when the .308 round is also overkill, I happen to like my rabbit non exploded thank you.

Survival
-cold weather camo gear
-MREs or similar nonperishables, whatever I can get my hands on really. I would hunt or otherwise acquire food as we go, touching the preserved stuff only when absolutely required.
-heavy duty low profile tent with thermal insulation and snowy terrain camoflage.
-Heavy coccoon type sleeping bag rated to at least -30 C
-SATphone
-CB radio
-survival GPS (these last three items may or may not be useful in the long run, but I'd rather have them than be blind if there is something still functional out there.)
-compact gas generator
-bike pedal generator (for when gas is more precious than my thighs not being sore as hell)
-rechargable power supply compatible with both of the above.
-waterproof matches
-flint striker
-electric space heater
-electric camp stove (for when a fire isn't an option)
-fishing net and tackle
-twine, string, and rope. Multiple types and thicknesses.
-rechargable light sources.
- compact foldable shovel/trench tool
-Becker Tactool, exceptionally functional straightedge utility knife that is more than usable in a fight.
-several years worth of multivitamin supplements, fighting off hordes of undead only to die of scurvy would really suck
-water purification tablets. similar reasons to the above. Boiling water is much easier on the taste buds, but isn't always possible.


Other
-FED Alpha with .50 cal machine gun. Brand new hybrid variant of the good old tough as nails HMMWV with both an equipped solar panel and the option to switch to gas only if need be. I get two bonuses with this thing. The original engine was tough enough to handle... alternative fuels, from kerosene to high proof alcohol. The one used in the FED supposedly has similar attributes, although in both cases deviation from the standard diesel is not recommended in the long term due to maintenance problems. Also, when not using the vehicle on a regular basis, I can exploit the solar cells to power other crap.
-multiple nooks loaded with as many books as I can cram in there. They have close to zero power usage and take up zilch in space, so they're not as much of a waste as some other luxury items.


I could probably double this list if I kept going, but let's cut it off there. its too long as it is. My actual plan is to go north with as many of my family as I can get my hands on. Scavenge as we go along, take the country highways, and avoid major populations where possible. Initial goal would be the region of northern Quebec, but we'd remain flexible as to the final location. There is lots of wild game in that area and enough of a population density that a decent quantity of supplies will remain available for scavenging for quite some time. Most importantly, the weather is favorable for long term survival. Not because freezing my arse off in a tent in the middle of the woods is particularly healthy, but because the winters there will destroy more walking corpses than I could in a dozen lifetimes.
 
Dec 14, 2009
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I'd probably die.

Why?

Because I have no illusions of being some sort of zombie fighting expert. I have no combat, survival or weapon training.

I'd try to survive, of course, but it probably wouldn't end well.

Inb4 "I grab my katana and herpa derp"

Yes, because your mock sword that you bought for 50 quid is totally combat worthy.
 

Rawne1980

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Jul 29, 2011
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First i'd buy some earplugs.

Then i'd play Celine Dion songs incredibly loud.

I'd then watch out of my window as zombie heads explode, unable to take the horror that is being forced on their ears.
 

Soviet Steve

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May 23, 2009
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Supplies + Boat + Oil rig. If any of humanity lives we have oil. If they don't then oh well.
 

Andy Shandy

Fucked if I know
Jun 7, 2010
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Buy a lot of treadmills and place them round my house like so



Either that or buy a lot of duct-tape and tape lots of random things together and see what random things happen a la Dead Rising 2.
 

Cosmosis

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Mar 12, 2012
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Probably cry, vomit a bit, and then die at the hands of the zombie overlords.

Despicable cowardice is probably my biggest flaw as a person; it certainly wouldn't help during a hypothetical situation that calls for hypothetical competence.
 

Colour Scientist

Troll the Respawn, Jeremy!
Jul 15, 2009
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I have long accepted the fact that should any kind of apocalypse come (apart from all of those fake ones) I am going to die, quickly and painfully.

 

aba1

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Mar 18, 2010
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I would either find a relatively obscure restaurant to stay in for a while till most of the zombies have died off or go north where there would be no zombies really to attack me all that much and attempt to live off the land. I wouldn't have to go to far north as I live in Canada.

The right clothing I think will also go far especially at the start think materials that cannot be cut easily would be ideal things like thick leather.

Using a practical weapon is something most people don't consider. Guns likely won't work all that well since the people are still moving even with being dead so having one more little hole in them isn't going to go very far plus guns have finite ammo. Ideally you and a semi long melee weapon that will cause sever body injuries with limited splash depending on how the disease is spread. Things like a spear, axe or machete are good since they are re-usable have at least a bit of range and minimal splash (compared to say a chainsaw) plus they are all items that most home will have or at least have at least one of or the items to make also they are fairly quite as to not draw even more attention. Barbed wire around living areas is also great since it acts like a net and a fence.

Minimal traveling is ideal if possible. It is best to move early on if you have to before there are more zombies than people.
 

Baff

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Mar 2, 2012
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I'm fully redneck, so I'm well equiped for the Zombie Apocalpyse.

I was thinking about this the other day, what would be my plan?
Rob the gun shop? Raid the school armoury?
I was thinking Windsor Castle would be a good place to hold out, defensable and all that.

And then I thought, sod it. That's too far for me to drive, I CBA. I'm going with the axe in each hand kill 'em all.

Bring the Zombies! I could do with the exercise.
 

Rowan93

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Aug 25, 2011
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If they're slow zombies, they're completely harmless except in giant hordes, and giant hordes can easily be softened up. My weapon of choice will be a poleaxe, or even better/more insanely (because it would never be practical with human enemies) a polehammer. Obviously a great big weight would be difficult to use, but if I get the head of an ordinary hammer and put it on the end of a 2 or 3 metre pole. If a zombie comes close to me, I can cave its head in without coming near its reach, and it's not smart enough to grab my weapon so I can easily try again if I miss (which I probably will the first few times).

If they're fast zombies, on the other hand, I need to put on something biteproof, and quickly. Aaand once I've done that I don't even need to care all that much about the zombies themselves, just the "apocalypse" bit. I should probably do this for the slow zombies too, but I'm in less of a hurry there and it's a lot easier to just kill the slow ones.

Now, in either case, I need to find/form a band of survivors to set up a secure location to sleep in at night, either moving from place to place or building a fort from which we start securing the surrounding area, but that bit is more into "make things up as I go along" territory.



Of course, the problem with zombie apocalypses is that, to a modern military (whose lower ranks are filled with people familiar with zombie tropes, even!) a zombie horde is practically harmless. It's somewhere on the line between "totally harmless" and "enemy that the generals dream about being able to fight".

And thus, if a zombie apocalypse does successfully happen, it means that a force of zombies that starts off numerically inferior can march over a prepared killing zone, straight over a minefield, and straight through oceans of razor wire fences, and eat the brains of a whole bunch of genre-savvy troops wearing plenty of body armour.
I'm not sure what that would take, but we could start with "imagine if every single zombie was a special zombie in Left 4 Dead" and work from there. Inevitably, that would mean you have no chance to survive make your time.
 

Scarim Coral

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Oct 29, 2010
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Geez you put alot of thought into this assuming if everything goes right for you.
As for me the only thing I got in mind is to somehow make a make shift metal armour that is bite proof and somehow still light weight enough for me to run about without getting tried from the extra weight.
Other than that I will just wing it out somehow.
 

Mafoobula

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Sep 30, 2009
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Realistically, a zombie apocalypse wouldn't last two weeks before they're all dead. Consider the following:

Their food source is us, and we're pretty damn good at survival. And, you know, we can fight off the hoards with any number of methods, almost all of them are effective against zombies.

Zombies aren't all that good at fighting back. Unless they're smart enough to think of defending themselves, and unlikely possibility, considering the brain rot, we can mow through them easily enough. Sure, they might try to eat us, but that's where our defensive measures come in.

Zombies can't fight off the little pests that eat dead and/or rotted flesh. Simple enough. Mostly insects, some small animals... and bacteria! The littlest bit of rotted flesh will fester like mad, quickly crippling the zombie.

Zombies can't regulate their body temperature, and don't know when to seek shelter from the elements. Too cold, their bodies freeze up and lock up. Too hot, they'll decompose really, really fast, if not something more gruesome.

Zombies can't feel pain, and don't know to avoid hazards. Zombies have no problem walking off a cliff. If they step on a nail or even a sharp rock, well, they fall apart all the faster.

So, realistically, I would stock up on food and chill for a while.
 

SckizoBoy

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Jan 6, 2011
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A Hermit's Cave
Daystar Clarion said:
Yes, because your mock sword that you bought for 50 quid is totally combat worthy.
Psssh... my £100 lightsabre will soooooooooooo kick arse... *snrk*

Swear I've got a Thunder Hammer & Storm Shield around here somewheres, too...
 

Muspelheim

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Apr 7, 2011
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Realistic scenario: I'll die. Either when the zombies break down the barricade or when the authorities bomb the city or when the fallout from all the panicked nuclear exchanges settle down. Maybe I can make a glow-in-the-dark snowman on the roof before I croak?

Or even more likely, be slighty inconvenienced while the zombies are put down by the authorities.

But let's go with it, it's a textbook zombie apocalypse survival fantasy affair, and I have access and the skills needed to all the equipment, somehow.

For a main weapon, I'd prefer an old bolt-action combat rifle of some sort. A Mauser or some other dependable type, which means I'll have to be very frugal with the shots I have and makes it less inviting to waste ammunition. A civilian hunting rifle, with the most common calibre, would work fine, too. It'd be slightly less durable, I imagine, but it'd be simple and practical, and there would be at least -some- ammunition to find for it.

For secondary, a revolver would work. Not too complicated in the hands of an amateur, and fairly easy to keep in good condition.

For a sidearm, I'd use a crowbar. A useful tool as well as an acceptable weapon. If I'm close enough to the Zeds to have to use it for the latter, I've failed somewhere either way.

And for transportation, a horse. Since this is a fantasy, I know how to look after a horse on the go, how to ride it in rough terrain and how to keep it under control when it smells and hears hungry hungry zombies. Relatively quiet, quick and agile. Also, valuable company.

An ever so slightly more realistic option would be a bike. The plan is, basically, to keep away from the Zeds as much as possible and go into hiding at more isolated locations (while avoiding the streams of refugees from the continent heading north into the forests), laying low and waiting for a promising fortified settlement to crop up I can hide in.

But again, if there really was a Left 4 Dead-like zombie scenario, I'd probably be a zombie somewhere in the back eating someone's grannie.

EDIT: Again, it's all a game of pretend. In real life, I wouldn't have access to any of this (Well, I do own a crowbar, and I could always get a hunter's license). Grain of salt. Will taste all the better for the Zeds.