10 *subtle* ways to tell her she's too fat

[Raven's Nest]

If my girlfriend went from 100lbs to 200lbs in a matter of months I'd have no problem turning around and saying;

"Baby, you got fat... I think you should hit the gym... Look at this picture *holds up picture of Scarlett Johansson*, If you looked like her, I'd stay with you forever."

Spoiler

I actually said this to my girlfriend at the time then broke up with her a week later... Within a month she had become bulimic and lost 4 stone...

Guess that makes me a massive prick huh?

[sub]But she was well fat though...[/sub]

 

[Ravenbom]

Oh god. This is the bullshit that makes women think everything we guys do means something else when 99% of what we do means exactly what it appears to mean. This is why girls think guys are complicated when we're not.


Though on the purely male level, it was kind of amusing.

 

[BakaMick]

I heard my mate actualy say to his girlfriend, at the time, "I'm sorry, your just not the girl I fell in love with .... I think you ate her though".

Just to clerify, he was monumentaly drunk and he is kinda a douche. But I still laughed my face off.

 

[Marter]

Best way to tell someone they are fat - "You are too fat. You should lose some weight. There are many health problems that can occur from being overweight, and I don't want to lose you."

Honest, straightforward and shows them you care.

 

[Zorpheus]

Frankly, best thing to do is tell the truth. If the girl is going to dump you over the truth, then she's not really a prime catch, anyway. People need to learn to take criticism constructively and stop getting defensive.

That said, most of these are douchebag things to do except "Start working out yourself" and "Change your own diet". Just go out and say it. Jeez.

 

[Labyrinth]

That article reads like it's straight out of a "How to be a Nice Guy (tm)" manual. Manipulative, emotionally destructive and showing a total lack of communicative ability within the relationship. In short, it's a very good recipe for acute disaster.

There's a big difference between being offended by someone gaining weight because it looks bad and being genuinely concerned about their health, just as there's a big difference between having body fat as a natural part of one's physique and being unhealthy because one is unfit. It's entirely possible to be skinny and unhealthy after all.

That website as a whole makes me twitch. I shouldn't read it lest I succumb to the temptation to tear chunks out of its supporters.

 

[RicoADF]

*SNIP* Of course, I'm taking the female perspective, and I do understand that guys are different. *SNIP*

It's got nothing to do with being a guy, each person is different. For me its the emotions for the girl that matters, I'd rather snuggle with my gf in bed then have sex with the hottest star, because theres something between us.
And yes I am a guy, so as I said, its to do with the person not gender, I get sick of that stereotype (even tho I do agree alot of guys are like that (just after the physical), alot of girls are too, its a human thing in general)

 

[Kwaren]

Physical beauty is nice I cannot deny that, but I think people should be able to overlook such petty things.

 

[maninahat]

Some are okay. I liked the idea of you starting your own diet and exersize program for yourself. That seems to be the nicest and most ideal - because that could end up being something you can do together.

Plenty of the others are fairly manipulative and selfish, but then what is the actual alternative? Tell them your becoming less attracted to their repulsive, fat body? Tell them you'll dump them if they keep putting on the weight? Sexual attraction is a bastard, but it effects both men and women and can't be helped without some serious self-denial. These top 10 techniques, whilst cruel, seem like a reasonable means to an end.

Plus, imagine how crap she could ultimately feel when they realise, too late, that they have all that extra "junk in the trunk". getting them to lose weight early on will feel as good for both them and you.

People also keep bringing up the sexism of this article. Really? All this shit works in reverse too. Women aren't necessarily content with their guy becoming a fat pig and they might want to do something about it. Most of these tricks could probably work on a dude too.

 

[Sigel]

-_-

Not sure how I feel about it. Kinda in a reverse situation. I have lost over thirty pounds, have been eating really healthy, am ready for the summer but my husband has gained a lot of weight and is not doing anything about it.
While I am kinda of repulsed by some of them, I am kinda torn on others cause I'm wondering if they might work.

 

[Deviltongue]

Straight up, if I'm not willing to change myself, why would I try to change her? If she decides to lose weight on her own accord I'm cool with that but I'm not gonna push her, especially not using any of these methods where I'd have to do stuff that might get my dick cut off.

 

[Meggiepants]

Oh oh oh! Can I submit a list to this website? I have one for the subtly informed ladies that they might find useful...

10 ways to subtly inform him you've been faking it.

 

[Steve the Pocket]

Wow. I never thought I'd see this come up again. I first encountered this article when this guy I know online ripped into them [http://agoutirex.livejournal.com/133258.html]. I didn't have anything to add then, and I still don't, really.

 

[jboking]

snip

I'm sorry...I just can't see this as anything but selfish. If you were really were concerned about her "health" (come on, let's get serious here...), then the solution is simple: tell her that you're worried about her health.

Have you ever seen this practiced in a relationship that is still budding? Say only a few months long? It's a sure-fire way to get yourself dumped as a guy, and most guys know that. It may not mean anything to you, but I can tell you from watching it happen that this line in itself seems just as offensive to a lot of girls as "Hey, you're fat. Stop that."

And yes, this goes both ways...guys feel this way about girls, and girls feel this way about guys. That doesn't make it right. If you're in a meaningful relationship, putting on a few extra pounds doesn't matter. Seriously. "Don't you care that you're physically unattractive for me?" Wow...I would hate to be your girlfriend, having to keep up appearances just for your pleasure. I might have been able to agree with you a little before that statement. I'm glad that I can wake up in the morning with my hair all a mess, no makeup on, bleary-eyed and scruffy and still get an "I love you" from my partner. I'm sorry I'm ranting it's just...guys like you are what gave me so many insecurities and low self-esteem issues growing up.

/end rant

I'm actually really interested as to how this got socially engineered, cause I know there are dozens of women out there with his exact mindset. I even know a couple who have been married for almost 10 years now with this exact mindset. It's what gave me quite a few self-esteem issues as well.

 

[MR T3D]

number 8 is fine to me.
and 6.
number 4 seems like a decent idea.
and 3
and sort of 1
Some of these are little subtle things people should do to keep themselves fit
FOR THE HEALTH!

 

[ChocoFace]

Let's not speak of this site ever again, m'kay?
I'm also one to rather say what's on his mind than beat around the bush. Usually because i have a way with words, so others don't take offense..most of the time.

 

[jboking]

Those of you familiar with my blog and my comments on other blogs know that I have said that arguments between feminist women and anti-feminist women are really just arguments about how to best extract money and other resources from men.
[...]
Feminism is really just left wing female supremacism.

...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHA!!!

You know. If he was talking specifically about the modern feminist movement, I wouldn't think he's too far off. While a lot of feminist women out there only want fair treatment, there are far too many vocal minorities that fell like shouting about the evil that is the Y chromosome.

Maybe if we just told all the reasonable feminists to separate themselves from the jackasses in their midst by joining the egalitarian party...

 

[CakeDragon]

Number 10 - bad start. That's horrible, and make her take them back to exchange? Talk about embarassing
Number 9 - what, you mean lie to her?
Number 8 - that's just plain silly
Number 7 - starve her..? Ridiculous
Number 6 - just the first sentence... What the hell!?
Number 5 - some guys like doing that... I know mine does.
Number 4 - now that's just mean.
Number 3 - unfair, that's like blackmail
Number 2 - whaaat!? That's so horrible!
Number 1 - Oh come on...

Oh dear, I got progressively more angry as I went through. That's stupid!

So, when we're always told to be happy with yourself, yknow, to be proud of what you are, and then we're told to screw that over?

I'm not fat but I do have a little bit of excess weight. My boyfriend says I'm fine as I am but I am a little bit conscious of it. However if he was to do anything suggested in that article, well, I dunno, I'd have to seriously consider what he thought about me.

Don't ever take advice like this. It can only lead to disaster.

 

[Robby Foxfur]

A lot of that makes me feel bad about myself jsut feeling overweight now. I feel like i need to go and get massive head trama so i'd be in a coma to lose some wieght, that or a merical happens and I can gain a fast metotabalism.

 

[Mr. Socky]

Girl, I've only been with you a short time. Well, pretty baby, I have to say.....
YOU'RE FAT,FAAAATTT!!!!

Actually, that'd probably go over better than using any of the insulting, backhanded ways in the list that would probably get you broken up/divorced rather than have the intended effect.