100 Things learnt from video games

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badgersprite

[--SYSTEM ERROR--]
Sep 22, 2009
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~ Kill any random animal and they will drop 100g and a magical resist-fire ring.

~ If you're not strong enough, you don't have to work out; you just need more experience.

~ There's no such thing as a poisonous plant - they all cure status ailments.

~ If we go into space, the Zergrush will destroy us (unless we use 'power overwhelming').

~ "Our species is mono-gendered. Male and female have no real meaning to us."

~ The fine for necrophilia is 500 gold.

~ Ammunition doesn't weigh anything. Not even mini-nukes.

~ You fail it. Your skill is not enough.

~ A winner is you!
 

SteakHeart

New member
Jul 20, 2009
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You can snap bones into place and rip shrapnel out of your body without feeling any pain whatsoever, and you don't need to bandage up the shrapnel holes afterwards. (Far Cry 2)
 

badgersprite

[--SYSTEM ERROR--]
Sep 22, 2009
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~ Everybody from every country and every period in time ever had an American accent...Except for the Nazis.

~ On that note, if they have accents, they're probably evil.

~ England was the only country that existed in the Middle Ages.

~ Always win. You have to place first in a race if you want to unlock the best stuff.

~ Australia would have won The Ashes if they'd just created a custom character with perfect stats.

~ "Fatigue" and "Stamina" mean the same thing.

~ Medicine would be greatly improved if we returned to medieval herbs and potions.

~ Phoenix Downs don't always work.

~ Nobody cares if you walk into their house and rummage through their drawers and take their stuff, as long as you're on a quest to save the Princess.

~ Princesses are useless dimwits who get captured every time they draw breath, and the first person they should hire is a hostage negotiator.

~ "Stay away from the summoner!"

~ No matter what direction you walk in, you will eventually run into an invisible wall.

~ Jumping is an optional skill in the Armed Forces.
 

Baldry

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Feb 11, 2009
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Don't worry, no matter how bad it gets some group of super human morons will evventully save the world, as long as some of them fall in love and others get kidnapped(Pretty much every FF)
 

Chrono180

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Dec 8, 2007
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I'm fond of the Zelda axiom myself. If there are multiple magical Mcguffins that can "save the world" it invariably is required that you must collect EACH and EVERY BLOODY ONE OF THEM!

Oh, and guitars only have five frets and a strum bar.
 

ExplosionProofTaco

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Nov 13, 2008
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You can find out how well a Container or Door is locked just by looking at it, just 1 person can maintain a radio station (Agatha), you can eat a packet of crisps in 0.1 second and a sniper rifle can fall apart in 10 shots. - Fallout 3
 

The Atomic Irishman

New member
Oct 11, 2009
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-Hide at the mention of the word "Nerf"

-Most the enemy team is full of babies (Team Fortress 2.)

-Spam is a good thing (Team Fortress Classic.)

-A crowbar, a flashlight or an alien hammer will solve any problem.(Half Life Series, Halo, Doom.)

-Don't buy what you can't afford to lose(Eve Online.)

-All RTS AI cheat obscenely(Multiple games.)

-Survival favors the quick(Halo.)

-A dark, secluded corner or closet is your best friend(Left 4 Dead.)

-Always bring a friend!(All games.)
 

Tireseas_v1legacy

Plop plop plop
Sep 28, 2009
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You can fall 150 feet after being shot as a child, be capible of killing giant beetles, heavily armed bandits, trained guards, warewolves, and heroes, be strong enough to make a full carreer out of wood-chopping, blacksmithing, bar tending, bounty hunting, and assasination, own every piece of private property on a continent, and you still won't be able to climb onto a ledge four feet high. (Fable/Fable II)
 

Deleted

New member
Jul 25, 2009
4,054
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You can hold 100 cans of Coke and 100 cans of Pepsi but not no cans of pepsi and 200 cans of coke.

Don't think you'll get a store discount just because you are saving the world, you still have to pay as much as everyone else.

Taking turns during a fight is the gentleman's way to play.
 

Canadamus Prime

Robot in Disguise
Jun 17, 2009
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The Grand List Of Console Role Playing Game Cliches said:
#189 - The Moral of the Story: Every problem in the universe can be solved by finding the right long-haired prettyboy and beating the crap out of him.
 

PixelKing

Moderately confused.
Sep 4, 2009
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1 The cake is a lie (Portal)
2 Dont fuck with scientists (Half Life)
3 Chainsaws are fun (Gears)
4 Swearing makes you live longer.Just look at Desmond and Dukov! (Fallout)