A 16 year old boy on teen sex.

[deus-ex-machina]

...like the Pope being infallible and pretty much the right hand/mouthpiece of god in a literal sense.

Actually the Pope is never mentioned in the Bible and actually goes against lots of what the Bible says. Without meaning to offend anyone, the best way to describe the Catholics is as a well organized cult (I believe the Bible by the way).

Surely the Pope wouldn't be mentioned in the Bible because as of Pentecost and the distribution of the Apostles after having the Holy Spirit 'come into them', it was Peter who went off to establish the Church, which would progress to be the 'Catholic' church. Essentially, he was the first 'Pope' but the establishment and position of such a title would come after the Bible.

The Bible is open for interpretation. I find all the Christian denominations and Judaism as ridiculous and 'cultish' as one another if that's how you wish to describe religions which use the Bible. I don't particularly find anything more bizarre about the teaching of the Catholic church (bar trans vs consubtantiation [sp]) compared to Baptists or other protestants.

 

[spartan231490]

it's personnal, however there are still many people who believe that sex should wait until marriage. Im not quite that bad, but relatively close. It's just a preferance thing. Find someone with similar, if not the same opinions about sex, and enjoy your relationship. btw, everyone pisses off their parents for something or other, they'll get over it.

 

[Pennyy9]

[/quote]

Sex before marriage is an out-dated idea which doesn't make much sense nowdays. Oh and it sounds like you have a bit fo a Marilyn complex

What is a Marilyn Complex?

 

[OmegaXzors]

I don't even need an argument as to why you're justified. Religion twists the very fabric of someone's lifestyle. I could sit here and rant but your story was beautiful. I chose to have a life style where I only have intercourse with girlfriends with strong relationships, rather than have meaningless monkey sex. That's where my parents raised me right.

While my parents are claimed Christians and wanted me to wait until marriage, they didn't throw me out the window because their bible told them they have to love me still. So, your mother is disobeying God?

 

[AMMO Kid]

The Bible is open for interpretation. I find all the Christian denominations and Judaism as ridiculous and 'cultish' as one another if that's how you wish to describe religions which use the Bible. I don't particularly find anything more bizarre about the teaching of the Catholic church (bar trans vs consubtantiation [sp]) compared to Baptists or other protestants.

At the same time as it being open for interpretation it still has the basic truths that it is very straight forward about, and the Catholics don't believe those things and change them. The same with the Church of Christ.

 

[AMMO Kid]

The Bible is open for interpretation. I find all the Christian denominations and Judaism as ridiculous and 'cultish' as one another if that's how you wish to describe religions which use the Bible. I don't particularly find anything more bizarre about the teaching of the Catholic church (bar trans vs consubtantiation [sp]) compared to Baptists or other protestants.

At the same time as it being open for interpretation it still has the basic truths that it is very straight forward about, and the Catholics don't believe those things and change them. The same with the Church of Christ.

 

[Pennyy9]

I'd like to point out a few things in the beginning argument and play devil's advocate.

Girls become amazing creatures of mystic beauty, and I can't say I'm not entranced all the time by them. Breasts everywhere! Oh my goodness, and porn, PORN, it's amazing stuff.

Congratulations, you're heterosexual. This was not relevant.

15 I move to high school, (we have freshmans in with 7-8ers) drop Christianity, And I suddenly have a clean social slate. Girls talk to me!

If you're association to the Baptist faith was a social handicap, I'd blame the pastor. Nevertheless, you're suggesting there were NO girls who were christian in your junior high. Or that they were all ugly and you didn't want to talk to them. So either you're the pariah of your town, or shallow. Your allusion to a "real" girlfriend leads me to believe the latter is more likely.

Then I meet a girl.... M is depressed, she hates her life. I discover I don't need to change myself at all, she likes me the same. M and I fall in love, slowly at first, but then we become full on mad for each other. I meet her parents, she meets mine, we do so many things together, the ideal couple.... This goes on for a month until one night, she feels terrible. Like she lost all happiness and faith in life, and she needs to be away from her parents. I console her, then sneak her into my room for a night. Her parents call in the morning. I lie. A policeman shows up, and I tell the truth, and we break up, simply because she isn't so sad anymore. I'm heartbroken.

So let's recap: You found a nice, but sad, girl. Because you're a good listener and she doesn't try to change you, you two fall in love. Then she becomes... sad? Was the relationship making her happy? Not important to the reason you wrote this, but why include it? Especially since she breaks up with you "because she isn't so sad anymore"! Is she a Mood Girlfriend, that you can only date when she's the right mood?

Now this is the true purpose of this post.

So the first part - the longest - was just a set up for this? Moreover, it's addressed to the parents? How many parents are reading a forum on a site for Gaming and Entertainment?

You most likely love your children very much, and want to protect them. Sex is something you share with someone you love. Does making that love official and binding suddenly legitimize the act of reproduction? No, sex means a lot to some, and little to others. If you treat it with respect, it's not going to be a big deal, unless you make it one. Safe sex is easy. Pill, condom, done. Now don't get me wrong, it's not 100% effective, but there are a colossal number of teens who don't practice safe sex. And that isn't DIRECTLY because their parents let them have sex, it's because they didn't learn about it. If you keep sex from them, they are going to stumble headfirst into it, as I did. Sex is a gift to be shared among lovers, not a stamp you get on a marraige certificate.

So lets wrap up here. You want everyone of "us parents" reading to teach "our kids" about sex. Even allowing for some rigid families, who won't discuss sex at all, Sex Ed is a part of Junior High and High School curriculum in Health. (Then again, how many kids do you know who READ the book?) I will point out that the real reason for it isn't to prevent AIDS or other STDs. It's to prevent more kids whose parents are too busy being kids to be adults and parents. So it's not a religious thing. That's just shows that religions have good ideas sometimes, too.

Damn you and your reasoned arguments.

number one: None of the Christian girls in my town (It's a university town) would have even looked twice at me. And I had had a girlfriend before, but we really didn't know what that kind of relationship was, so I didn't count it as such.

number two: She was quite depressed, and I helped her out of it for a while. It doesn't invalidate and of my feelings for her, or her for me. She broke up with me because she didn't love me the same way anymore. She has not ever gone into depression since that month.

number three: My sex ed happened once, in fifth grade. I didn't remember very much of it, and it didn't say a word about contraception, it was more on what happens when you want to make a baby.

 

[manaman]

...We go up to her room, and sleep together for the first time, without protection. I am a virgin, she is not, but I know she is clean (She had been tested every three months prior), and I am ready. Our relationship deepens greatly from then on , and we have (protected) sex many more times.

I know you wanted a comment on your message down there, full of 16 year old logic as it is, but I wanted to comment on the odd ball part of your story.

If you where with this girl, and everything was going great what in the world did she need to be off getting tested for STD's every three months, unless she was off sleeping around. The depression you mentioned, the rush to sex, the clingy needyness. This girl was not balanced, she had issues, and at that age it isn't a good thing.

Oh and don't forget you live in your parents house, you should respect the boundaries they have placed on their home, and you should work to gain your mothers trust back. You know the trust you threw away from crazy there that just wanted to jump your bones for drama and then leave you when she went manic.

 

[Eggsnham]

Yup, the whole sex before marriage thing is over-rated. Granted, I wouldn't know %100 anyways, considering I am neither a virgin, nor am I married, but I feel that if you love someone, or if the urge to let your primal instincts take over is too great (and your partner feels the same way. Make sure that he/she just wants to have some fun and isn't looking for a solid relationship), then go ahead and do it.

 

[Pennyy9]

First off: You're still fucking young.
Second off: As you can see, the relationship didn't work well in the end anyway.

If people don't have something to hold out for, then we simply won't. We're all shallow creatures and if we give someone our all then there is nothing left to work for. Nothing left to discover. It's sad but it's true.

You're saying in a nutshell that we need to save something simply because we'll get bored if we run out of things to give to other people?

No, to the same person. Please at least read my post.
Anyway, shouldn't sex be something shared between someone you're sure of and trust?
You can't well, sorry to sound like a preacher, undo sex.

I did! I can't say I loved her because it would provoke the "You're young and don't know what love is" responses, but I trusted her implicitly.

 

[Free Thinker]

If I ever get a girlfriend, it's up to both of us to decide if we're ready or not. If she wants to wait till marriage, I'll respect and honor that. If she's already taking my pants off...HOT DAMN! And yes I am Agnostic, self-declared. My parents allow me my choice, but my uncle who is born-again Baptist, should he ever find out, will preach me to death.

 

[cyber_andyy]

Not even halfway through highschool, still shouldn't have done it.

Early graduate my friend. But please explain why I shouldn't have.

Despite what you may think, You're not even close to being adults. Not even young ones. Even if you understand exactly what's going on doesn't change your age nor the possible consequences.

In the UK, 16 is two years from being an adult...thats pretty close.

 

[deus-ex-machina]

The Bible is open for interpretation. I find all the Christian denominations and Judaism as ridiculous and 'cultish' as one another if that's how you wish to describe religions which use the Bible. I don't particularly find anything more bizarre about the teaching of the Catholic church (bar trans vs consubtantiation [sp]) compared to Baptists or other protestants.

At the same time as it being open for interpretation it still has the basic truths that it is very straight forward about, and the Catholics don't believe those things and change them. The same with the Church of Christ.

I attended Catholic schools until I was 18. My father was Catholic and my mother was CoE. My Uncle is a Catholic priest. My fiancee's family are Baptist and I am very close to them. I recently had my daughter Christened in a Church of England church and we have been attending the services there for several months. I really don't see the difference in the fundamental teaching. The 10 Commandments still stand, marriage and all other sacraments are still sacred. All Churches would condemn sex before marriage in principle but wouldn't condemn the OP for having sex because he is still a human. All believe mankind is fallible but that God forgives. Only archaic congregations in some swamp would force him to do ANYTHING but pray for forgiveness so I don't think he will have to worry about marrying this girl, even if he did get her pregnant.

I sincerely think you will find that all major denominations get away with calling themselves Christian because they follow the main, fundamental teachings of the Bible and not that I wish to argue this point any further with you in this thread, but I would like some examples of the Catholic church straying from the teachings.

 

[Marmooset]

I'm 16. Most people would say young, some would say young man, I would say 16. I was raised Baptist, thats the 90's Christians fad for the uninformed. I'm VERY agnostic right now. My mom always told me of the importance of waiting until marriage, and as a small child I accepted it. I never even thought about it until puberty.


13 hits, and so do the changes, with everything that comes in that volatile age, that I'm just finishing up on as I write this. Girls become amazing creatures of mystic beauty, and I can't say I'm not entranced all the time by them. Breasts everywhere! Oh my goodness, and porn, PORN, it's amazing stuff. A hard line to pleasure, a personal heroin. I live the life of a regularly troubled teen kid, until 15 hits.


15 I move to high school, (we have freshmans in with 7-8ers) drop Christianity, And I suddenly have a clean social slate. Girls talk to me! My first girlfriend, my first REAL girlfriend is a disaster. I chickened out, couldn't talk, all the normal problems. Over the next few months I develop a niche as the rebound kid. I'm such a great fixer for all the problems that are troubling girls hearts. I'd make a great gay friend. But the trouble is, I'm not. It's horrible being so close to girls you like and having them want to be friends.

Then I meet a girl. Her name, for the purpose of this post is M. M is depressed, she hates her life. I discover I don't need to change myself at all, she likes me the same. M and I fall in love, slowly at first, but then we become full on mad for each other. I meet her parents, she meets mine, we do so many things together, the ideal couple. One night, she tells me to come over. Her parents are out, and she lets me into the house. We go up to her room, and sleep together for the first time, without protection. I am a virgin, she is not, but I know she is clean (She had been tested every three months prior), and I am ready. Our relationship deepens greatly from then on , and we have (protected) sex many more times. This goes on for a month until one night, she feels terrible. Like she lost all happiness and faith in life, and she needs to be away from her parents. I console her, then sneak her into my room for a night. Her parents call in the morning. I lie. A policeman shows up, and I tell the truth, and we break up, simply because she isn't so sad anymore. I'm heartbroken.

Now this is the true purpose of this post. My mother, kind though she is, isn't furious that I snuck a girl into my house, that I hid her from her parents. My mother cant stand the fact I had sex before I was married. She was irate, for whatever reason. This is my message to all parents concerned about their children's sex lives.


You most likely love your children very much, and want to protect them. Sex is something you share with someone you love. Does making that love official and binding suddenly legitimize the act of reproduction? No, sex means a lot to some, and little to others. If you treat it with respect, it's not going to be a big deal, unless you make it one. Safe sex is easy. Pill, condom, done. Now don't get me wrong, it's not 100% effective, but there are a colossal number of teens who don't practice safe sex. And that isn't DIRECTLY because their parents let them have sex, it's because they didn't learn about it. If you keep sex from them, they are going to stumble headfirst into it, as I did. Sex is a gift to be shared among lovers, not a stamp you get on a marraige certificate.


I have practiced safe sex to this day, and will continue to for the rest of my life.

Long story short: I nailed somebody, and I wanted you all to know.
The sub-plot about my mom? Smoke and mirrors.

 

[redblinky]

I actually read the first page and then about 3 other pages of this entire thread there's some good comedy here.

First off to the guy who says the "Bible has been changed" I dont think its been changed. But translation has always been a bit of an issue anyone who can take it from its original translation can tell you that for sure. But the real issue would be if you accept Mosaic Authorship or if you accept the fact that the Bible was written at several different times by several different people commonly known as the documentary hypothesis. Then yes the Bible has been changed but at the same time it has not been changed that much.

Now on to the story of the OP. Wait til you get to college. Sex is so commonplace and girls arent so self-conscious about it. Anyway, theres nothing wrong with sex i've had sex with girls and then dated them it happens. But I will tell you this upfront the one major thing i've learned is... Sex does not add to your relationships it has the potential to take away but never add to. The best you can hope to happen is she's really good at it so you tollerate her insanity a bit longer then otherwise. Here's to hoping my current GF doesn't read this

 

[Pennyy9]

But I will tell you this upfront the one major thing i've learned is... Sex does not add to your relationships it has the potential to take away but never add to.

Now it is on this point I have to disagree with you. Sex definitely has the potential to add to a relationship. It can (I.E. it did for me) deepen trust, dependence on each other , and emotional connections.

 

[Samurai Goomba]

...We go up to her room, and sleep together for the first time, without protection. I am a virgin, she is not, but I know she is clean (She had been tested every three months prior), and I am ready. Our relationship deepens greatly from then on , and we have (protected) sex many more times.

I know you wanted a comment on your message down there, full of 16 year old logic as it is, but I wanted to comment on the odd ball part of your story.

If you where with this girl, and everything was going great what in the world did she need to be off getting tested for STD's every three months, unless she was off sleeping around. The depression you mentioned, the rush to sex, the clingy needyness. This girl was not balanced, she had issues, and at that age it isn't a good thing.

Oh and don't forget you live in your parents house, you should respect the boundaries they have placed on their home, and you should work to gain your mothers trust back. You know the trust you threw away from crazy there that just wanted to jump your bones for drama and then leave you when she went manic.

I agree with respecting the boundaries of those who own the house where you live, as long as their demands aren't completely unreasonable ("Don't have unprotected sex in our house before marriage" is a pretty fair request). I'm an adult and can do whatever I want, but there are many things I don't do out of respect and love for my mother, since I still live at home for the moment. Once I'm out on my own I'll do what I feel like, is it really going to kill me to avoid doing the vertical sambo on the family couch?

I agree that it's strange for somebody who's totally clean to be getting tested every 3 months. Like, how much sex was she having/planning to have, and with how many people? Because STDs don't usually spring up out of nowhere if you're regularly having sex with the same one person.

 

[redblinky]

But I will tell you this upfront the one major thing i've learned is... Sex does not add to your relationships it has the potential to take away but never add to.

Now it is on this point I have to disagree with you. Sex definitely has the potential to add to a relationship. It can (I.E. it did for me) deepen trust, dependence on each other , and emotional connections.

It very may have.
So perhaps my statement is only true to me.
But it would seem once again just to reiterate perhaps there are better more fulfilling ways to bolster trust and dependance. I think spending time with that person trusting them with your secrets trusting them to be themselves and likewise being yourself while remaining faithful. Trusting them in none physical ways, because it easy for a younger guy to "fall in love" with a girl just for the physical. I've seen it happen I know what its like. If it seems like the relationship is a bit off sex isn't going to solve problems or help out the relationship.

Maybe I'm just a shallow person? But I never felt an emotional connection after sex only a physical one. I was like wow yeah we had sex awesome. But I never said that was great you know I wonder how this makes her feel I wonder if this makes us closer as a couple. If anything it just gives you a fast track to figuring out how psycho she is. Sex is euphoric it is similiar to drugs in the way it affects your brain so alot of things you feel can just be attributed to that high.
BUT IF YOU HAVE A GREAT EMOTIONALLY FULFILLING SEXUAL EXPERIENCE that brings you closer to whoever your doing with then awesome! Great and in no way allow my cynicism to diminish that at all.


And too the person above me maybe she was just saying every 3 months so he wouldnt be worried. But people I know only get tested after a negative experience . But there still young so maybe she had some preexisting condition she needed checked every once in a while.

 

[chenry]

If I wanted to know what a moron thought about sex, I'd have asked the one I have chained up in my dungeon. But he's got a ball-gag in his mouth, so all his answers are just MFFFFMFFF.