A conundrum to drum. No-one under 18.

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Pandabearparade

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Mar 23, 2011
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Eventidal said:
and about to have sex with someone. Simultaneously cheating on your mate.
...I'm pretty sure he meant 'mate' like his friend. His pal. His hombre. Not his butt-buddy.
 

Rawne1980

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Jul 29, 2011
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I've taken a lot of chances in my life and, fortunately, most of them have come good.

Go for gold.

You only live once.
 

Gudrests

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Mar 29, 2010
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Eventidal said:
You're 17, and about to have sex with someone. Simultaneously cheating on your mate.

For f**k's sake, kid, if you're going to pull that kind of asshole move, AT LEAST have the decency to tell your current mate you're not interested in him anymore. Be wary of the criminal girl, but if she's not over 18 at least it's not statutory rape. If this IS the case, for the love of God don't do it. Ignore your pants-brain for another year. If things go wrong her life gets basically cut short. Criminal record against her, statutory rape would ruin her FOREVER, and all because you wanted a little pleasure in the moment.

I'm assuming you live somewhere where the age of consent is 18, BTW. If not, ignore that stuff. But still, don't cheat. That's seriously such a douche move, I'd consider it karmic justice if the girl turned out to only be having sex with you to steal stuff from you or otherwise screw you over later.
.....I think you have something wrong here....the OP is from england...and "Mate" is like friend or something....unless im really reading it wrong in which case NO MAN NO CHEATING IS WRONG but I don't think I am....so yeah...no hit it and quit it.
 

The Random One

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May 29, 2008
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In before Admiral Ackb- oh crap.

OK, here's my two cents. You are 17 and insecure enough about how stuff rolls that you decided to ask a message board for help. That girl might not be as much trouble as she seems, but she also might be, and from what I could glimpse from you out of your post with my magnificent deductive skills she might very well destroy your life and bum you off relationships for a long time. If she's a stalker/protective type she might even destroy other chances you might have to bone hot chicks have meaningful relationships in the future. Do not hear to the 4chan immigrants and stay the Fuck away from that girl, it's not worth it.
 

Infernai

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Apr 14, 2009
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Eventidal said:
You're 17, and about to have sex with someone. Simultaneously cheating on your mate.
Maybe it's because I'm from Australia but...Mate is essentially a best friend, so i don't think that would essentially add up to cheating. Besides, i think the correct term for this would be boyfried/girlfriend not Mate and he didn't say he had a girlfriend/boyfriend so yeah.
 

Alade

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Aug 10, 2008
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My mother used to tell me to always think with both my heads. That is sound advice. To me it sounds like you should do some more thinking with the head downstairs. Tread carefully, sure, but bang her nonetheless.
 

Nukacola

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Jun 4, 2009
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I'd be sceptical, a girl who gives it up too qickly has probably low standards, probably has done things in that way before and where would you be going from that?

But ofc, you need to go with your gut, if you like the girl you might give it a shot. Who dares win, and as long as you keep your nose clean and keep out of trouble you probably wont get dragged into it, but then you need some strength of character.
 

NezumiiroKitsune

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Cleril said:
j-e-f-f-e-r-s said:
Aur0ra145 said:
To quote a staff member here at the Escapist, "Don't stick it in the crazy!" [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/columns/lovefaq/9007-Love-FAQ-Don-t-Stick-It-in-The-Crazy]

Let's add up a few things.

1. She bought you alcohol
2. She was the aggressive force in meeting
3. She lives in a foster home (so is she really all that stable?)
4. She performs oral when you've done nothing better than say, "hi" to her
5. She confesses to having a criminal record

These don't add up to anything good.

First off, do you think you're the first guy she's done this routine on?

What do you think she wants out of it? Because I can tell you, it isn't sex. She's trying to allure you via sex to conform to her needs (i.e. money or some fairy tale idea of a boyfriend, which not even The Most Interesting Man in the World could fulfill.)

Also, do you see her and respect her as a person? Or do you just want her to be your living, breathing, sex doll?

I personally don't see anything worthwhile coming out of this girl you've met. Best move on and find someone a bit more "classy."
Are you this charming to everyone you talk to? You've never even met the girl, and you're already making assumptions about her and refusing to even acknowledge that she might be a decent human being. Believe it or not, a lot of women enjoy havign casual sex, just like men. Not every woman wants to wait until she's got a ring on her finger before she fucks a guy.

OP: get the fuck in there. As you get older, you'll realise that everyone you meet has some sort of baggage. You're never going to meet a beautiful girl whose completely sane and completely devoid of any secrets or personal quirks.

So this girl has a criminal record? As long as it's not for something major like murder or arson, I don't see why this is a problem. And if you're worried about your parents reactions:

a) you don't have to take her and introduce her to your parents on your first date.

b) fuck your parents. I don't mean that in a disrespectful way, as I'm sure they're lovely, but seriously, fuck 'em. You can't go round making decisions in life based onwhat your parents might think.

If you like her, then get stuck in there. It sounds like she really likes you, and it definitely sounds like she wants to get in there with you. Women like that are not always easy to find, so jump in with both feet and see what happens. You're only 17, it's not like you're having to make a choice about your life partner.
The user you quoted stated she was not using him for casual sex, the sex was just the lure. A decent human being would not be performing oral on you within the first few hours of meeting you even if all they wanted was casual sex. She's being far too open just for casual sex, that's the red flag, and his need for sex is her sinker.
All that sounds very convoluted and paranoid, maybe she's just into casual sex.

I'm not sure what you're even alluding to, either of you. How will having sex with him get her anything? I mean, I'm not obtuse, of course she could use sex to get things; but as long as he lets his brain do the thinking, that shouldn't happen.

However, this is entirely your decision. If you aren't ethically troubled by it, and are willing to accept the risks inherent in hook-ups, then I don't think there's anything else to discuss. Use protection and go somewhere neutral or familiar (i.e. Not "this guys place I know"; I've known girls like that and the guy is usually a scum).

I imagine this isn't a first time thing, though if it is, while their isn't any real significance the cultural pedestal built for "virginity"; it's generally just a better memory to be with someone you actually like. Though I haven't seen this girl, so she might a 10, in which case, I'm surprised you managed to type this at all.

I, like others, don't understand how a criminal record matters, unless it's for something related, like kidnapping an ex or stalking and assaulting a random person.

Good luck with school.
 

Doctor Glocktor

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Aug 1, 2009
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Cleril said:
j-e-f-f-e-r-s said:
Aur0ra145 said:
To quote a staff member here at the Escapist, "Don't stick it in the crazy!" [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/columns/lovefaq/9007-Love-FAQ-Don-t-Stick-It-in-The-Crazy]

Let's add up a few things.

1. She bought you alcohol
2. She was the aggressive force in meeting
3. She lives in a foster home (so is she really all that stable?)
4. She performs oral when you've done nothing better than say, "hi" to her
5. She confesses to having a criminal record

These don't add up to anything good.

First off, do you think you're the first guy she's done this routine on?

What do you think she wants out of it? Because I can tell you, it isn't sex. She's trying to allure you via sex to conform to her needs (i.e. money or some fairy tale idea of a boyfriend, which not even The Most Interesting Man in the World could fulfill.)

Also, do you see her and respect her as a person? Or do you just want her to be your living, breathing, sex doll?

I personally don't see anything worthwhile coming out of this girl you've met. Best move on and find someone a bit more "classy."
Are you this charming to everyone you talk to? You've never even met the girl, and you're already making assumptions about her and refusing to even acknowledge that she might be a decent human being. Believe it or not, a lot of women enjoy havign casual sex, just like men. Not every woman wants to wait until she's got a ring on her finger before she fucks a guy.

OP: get the fuck in there. As you get older, you'll realise that everyone you meet has some sort of baggage. You're never going to meet a beautiful girl whose completely sane and completely devoid of any secrets or personal quirks.

So this girl has a criminal record? As long as it's not for something major like murder or arson, I don't see why this is a problem. And if you're worried about your parents reactions:

a) you don't have to take her and introduce her to your parents on your first date.

b) fuck your parents. I don't mean that in a disrespectful way, as I'm sure they're lovely, but seriously, fuck 'em. You can't go round making decisions in life based onwhat your parents might think.

If you like her, then get stuck in there. It sounds like she really likes you, and it definitely sounds like she wants to get in there with you. Women like that are not always easy to find, so jump in with both feet and see what happens. You're only 17, it's not like you're having to make a choice about your life partner.
The user you quoted stated she was not using him for casual sex, the sex was just the lure. A decent human being would not be performing oral on you within the first few hours of meeting you even if all they wanted was casual sex. She's being far too open just for casual sex, that's the red flag, and his need for sex is her sinker.
Did you just seriously imply that women that are strightforward in sex aren't "decent human beings?"

Thats so stupid I can barely comprehend that a person could actually believe that.
 

Actual

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Jun 24, 2008
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Hey if you want a fuck go for it. Just do not get attached to this girl as no matter what she says, she is not a keeper and won't be loyal. And wrap your cock, god knows where she's been and you don't want to catch anything horrible, like pregnancy.

And, as whenever you're sticking your dick in something you don't know well; be prepared for it to turn out to be crazy.

You could just do what most frustrated 17 year olds do and masturbate furiously until you meet a nice girl.
 

Unesh52

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May 27, 2010
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Has anyone mentioned how he doesn't want anyone under 18 in this thread, yet he is only 17?
 

clipse15

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May 18, 2009
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Cleril said:
Aur0ra145 said:
To quote a staff member here at the Escapist, "Don't stick it in the crazy!" [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/columns/lovefaq/9007-Love-FAQ-Don-t-Stick-It-in-The-Crazy]

Let's add up a few things.

1. She bought you alcohol
2. She was the aggressive force in meeting
3. She lives in a foster home (so is she really all that stable?)
4. She performs oral when you've done nothing better than say, "hi" to her
5. She confesses to having a criminal record

These don't add up to anything good.

First off, do you think you're the first guy she's done this routine on?

What do you think she wants out of it? Because I can tell you, it isn't sex. She's trying to allure you via sex to conform to her needs (i.e. money or some fairy tale idea of a boyfriend, which not even The Most Interesting Man in the World could fulfill.)

Also, do you see her and respect her as a person? Or do you just want her to be your living, breathing, sex doll?

I personally don't see anything worthwhile coming out of this girl you've met. Best move on and find someone a bit more "classy."
Hey, look, you went and became that rational voice for me. That is, all that you said, I vouch for it.

She's using you, not for sex, for some other scheme. You'd been with her for what, a few hours before she's performing oral? Yea, that's not a sign of anything remotely serious. I can understand wanting sex (I'm a virgin) but it's called porn. Porn is everything this girl is offering.

Hell, go to a sex shop and buy a fleshlight if you're so damn sexually frustrated. I want to myself but being that I have no money I can't exactly ask my parents for one.

Unless...Nah.

TLDR:
Wow what an incredibly archaic way of thinking. Sometimes people just want to have sex without having to pass this arbitruary time marker.

OP: Look you really have to pull your parents out of the equation. This is not a girl you have to bring home. If you want to have sex with her go right ahead.
 
Sep 14, 2009
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Captain_Fantastic said:
go for it mate its her criminal record not yours heck some of my pals have criminal records for stupid things they did and they are some of the most honorable people i know

EDIT if you see something with this girl dont let her go never make the mistake that will leave you wondering.
agreed, a few of my best friends are the nicest most honorable people i've ever met but they got some stupid stuff on their criminal records.

OP I would just be careful, sometimes if you "release" your tension, shit will hit the fan and be alot more than its worth in the long run, so if you really think you got a shot with her then go all for it but just be cautious, shit can blow up in your face in the blink of an eye.
 

Andy Beaumont

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Sep 30, 2011
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if this guy is trying for oxbridge which i can only assume... then he is aquatinted with english literature just as much as i am... it all says go for it to be honest... people think english people are charming and sweet... but really we actually are vindictive and think with our dicks just as much as anyone else, if not more! We are just more quiet about it...
 

Ursus Buckler

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Apr 15, 2011
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summerof2010 said:
Has anyone mentioned how he doesn't want anyone under 18 in this thread, yet he is only 17?
Yes yes, this point has been iterated before, and I'll say what I said to the last guy...

a) I'm 18 in less than a month, so w/e.
b) It happened to me at this age, but I thought that it wouldn't be appropriate for other people under 18 to read and I just KNOW I was going to get stick for it if I didn't put an age thing on it.

So, unless you have something meaningful to contribute...
 
Apr 28, 2008
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Aur0ra145 said:
To quote a staff member here at the Escapist, "Don't stick it in the crazy!" [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/columns/lovefaq/9007-Love-FAQ-Don-t-Stick-It-in-The-Crazy]

Let's add up a few things.

1. She bought you alcohol
2. She was the aggressive force in meeting
3. She lives in a foster home (so is she really all that stable?)
4. She performs oral when you've done nothing better than say, "hi" to her
5. She confesses to having a criminal record

These don't add up to anything good.

First off, do you think you're the first guy she's done this routine on?

What do you think she wants out of it? Because I can tell you, it isn't sex. She's trying to allure you via sex to conform to her needs (i.e. money or some fairy tale idea of a boyfriend, which not even The Most Interesting Man in the World could fulfill.)

Also, do you see her and respect her as a person? Or do you just want her to be your living, breathing, sex doll?

I personally don't see anything worthwhile coming out of this girl you've met. Best move on and find someone a bit more "classy."
I'm gonna have to agree with this guy.

Listen to your brain, not your penis. Seriously, nobody good gives oral that damn fast. She wants you for something, don't fall for it.
 

Unesh52

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May 27, 2010
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Ursus Buckler said:
So, unless you have something meaningful to contribute...
Heh, yeah... I don't really have much to say about it other than fucking go for it. Wrap it up and have some fun. Just don't try to build a relationship out of the experience if all you are really interested in is the sex. Pretty straightforward IMO.
 

Nickompoop

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Jan 23, 2011
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Ser Imp said:
http://hotlink.myspacecdn.com/images02/110/9cc9c454f004490b8bcfb029d8552721/m.gifhttp://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRRkdJbt1XLfT7stUwS1UlbxBcFsb1hoYVzhpfRnwAzU3nszwEUXQlSQoD36AI'd say go for it

BUT!
There ARE to considerations you have to take into account
FIRST: Are you aware exactly of what her crime was? This is something you REALLY need to get out of the way before making any kind of commitment.

SECOND: Make DAM sure you use protection. I know this should go without saying, but with her kind of attitude she MAY have something. Better safe than sorry.
Pretty much this. A condom is extremely important in this situation, and I doubt you would want Gorgon Dick Rot, or something. Also, there's a possibility that she's a drug user. If she isn't, great, but if she is you need to be very cautious. Drugs (and I'm talking about anything harder than pot) fuck you up, usually permanently.