A couple of questions to Americans

[JagermanXcell]

My experience in high school (just finished half a year ago) you may find interesting/different.

-American high school portrayed in entertainment.

A little bit here in there. Are we full of angst and are we dense? Yes, at some points but its apparent at in the first 2 years of high school. Some more then others though, it becomes less apparent once my class got into their Jr and Senior year we just stopped caring, grew up and waited to graduate. Did we have "bad boys" and "let loose" people? Eeeeeeh yeah, but they were generally look down on if they did drugs or lost their virginity just for cool points, while the who think themselves "popular" aka Douchebag kids actually did converge in one spot. They were small in numbers but their ego's were very very big, we tended to never concern ourselves with them, but there were times where they liked to show of their ego's and bully/belittle others in really dumb and sarcastic ways that seemed to only make their group laugh, it was pretty cringe worthy (the disappointment kind of cringe) and those who were bullied just ignored them, as they facepalmed at the sheer stupidity.

-The mean girl chicks.

They weren't mean per-say, they were again small in numbers but did try to get attention. Sluts pretty much, only a few though.

-Do nerds get stuffed into lockers.

We did have a spot where a lot of the hardcore nerds kept to themselves and away from the main campus in a large amphitheater, playing their DS's and wearing silly hats. We called the place "Narnia" the people who hung out there were "Narnians", so yeah "verbal lockers" are pretty apparent... ALTHOUGH Geeks, particularly me, my friends and several other people were very respected after our first year there. We'd talk a lot about movies, Marvel, comics, occasionally video games and no one saw it is "weird" but they took into such interest in how open we were about our hobbies (Me in particular got a lot of attention when I mentioned I danced, animated, and had deep understanding on Marvel and The Avengers with its popularity sparking from the movie's release). Then again half my friends are Christian and artists music wise, even with all our geek talk we were basically untouchable by most from being stereotyped and judged. Thats not to say we didn't get crap talked behind our backs, the Douchebag kids weren't exactly subtle when it came to judging people.

-Competition with Football and being the quarterback.

No, in fact our football team was awful, the coaches being hired were awful, the players literally did not care, so we didn't care, we lost almost every single game, for fun we'd go to the other teams bleachers and cheer for the better team. But, our Cross Country and Track team became the popular sport that we were know for, they did the best in our district and the team had really kind people.

-Proms kicking up drama.

No. People got asked (I ended up doing the best proposal *flexes muscles*), we went, it was boring. They overhype Prom to death in everything, I'm telling you right bartholen... there is no romantic kiss, no "OMG SHE LIKE BROKE UP WITH HIM HIS <3 IS LIKE BROKEN!!! LOL", no shocking revelation or epiphany, no unicorn that craps out ice cream and hands everyone a paintball gun to shoot at flying pigs (my analogy on how much they hyped Prom at my school).
IT. WAS. BLAND.
You eat, you dance, you chat, you go home. Thats how it was for ALL of us. The people at my school who say it was fun are such LIARS! XD

-Self esteem boosting.

Not sure how to answer this one... no one cared? More or less that, it was pretty much do or die, try too hard to be cool, we just secretly laugh at you behind your back.

So yeah, that was my American high school. Hope you learned something.

 

[soren7550]

The first one, which I'm sure many people outside of the US have thought about a lot as well, is: How much is real American high school life like how it's portrayed in entertainment?

Based on the movies I've seen, most took place in California, which evidently goes about teaching kids very differently than NYC does. NYC schools are very cramped, the teachers under supplied, under paid, and often irritable, the curriculum always laid out to 'prepare' you for the next City/State Standardized Test. Some characters in films do bear characteristic resemblances to actual high schoolers (at least ones I knew), but usually they're not like the genuine article at all.

So, just as a person from a different culture, how "realistic" is the depiction of high school in American entertainment? How common are the mean girls clicks? Do nerds really get stuffed into lockers? Is there really that much competition to be quarterback (or whoever the hell is the lead player, I don't know shit about American footb... sorry, handegg)? Do proms really kick up that much drama? I really want to know.

In my high school, there weren't really any clicks. Yes, there were those groups of friends that typically hung out together, but I wouldn't have called them a click. Most lockers in NYC schools are too small to stuff people in for that very reason (and also so that they can double or more the lockers they need for the ever increasing numbers of kids being crammed into the schools). My school didn't have a football team (no field to practice on, gear was too expensive, and the insurance was far too high), but the teams we had, as far as I'm aware, there wasn't that much competition to get on the teams (several had a hard enough time getting the required number of students to make out a team). Prom... eh, don't know too much about that. Didn't bother going to mine, but from what I've heard, a group of students were pissed that a driver ratted them out for bringing in alcohol.

The other one I have to ask about just because I'm so completely baffled by it. And that's self-esteem coaching.

Spoiler: Here's an episode of Bullshit! that explains it quite well

The whole time watching the episode I had my jaw on the floor. I'd heard of it before, but only now did I realize what kind of stuff it was. This is real? People really pay money for that? A guy is actually touring America, doing cheap magic tricks while telling kids that they're "special", and actually making them yell "I'm number 1!"???????? Just how big is this business? Do you know any people who buy into this stuff?

To be honest, I can ever remember something like this happening during my education. If anything, several teachers were fond of pointing out that there was nothing special about us, and how little we'd amount to in life.

Sorry if I missed anything, a bit sleepy and sharing a computer.

 

[scorptatious]

From my experience, I haven't really seen any instances of "mean girl" cliques or nerds getting stuffed into lockers in high school. Of course, I usually spend my time outside of class alone reading manga in the library, so I guess I'm not the best person to ask.

As for the self esteem thing, yeah, we definitely have a bunch of people here who are led to believe they are special snowflakes. Hell, I think as a little kid, I was convinced that at one point. Of course, when you enter the real world, that shit isn't going to fly.

 

[blizzaradragon]

snip

It really does depend on where you live honestly. The high school I went to is one of the bigger ones in the area, being in the Portland area of Oregon, and for us the stereotypes definitely existed but were also...odd. There were the mean girl cliques, although my school was weird in that they were members of either the drama club, the student council, or both. There were the jocks, but also within the "popular" group with them were the band students. For my school, football and marching band were 2 of the big 3 popular groups(the third being our dance team). The nerds did get put in lockers, and it's actually why I now have claustrophobia because of it happening to me. Then of the 4 years I was there, the cops were forced to intervene at our prom 3 of those years due to drama and fighting among the popular people. Including one year having both our prom king and prom queen going to the hospital because of a fight that broke out, thanks to a runner up in each group dating the winner in the other.

 

[Ihateregistering1]

It really depends on where you go to school, but certain aspects are true. People don't get stuffed into lockers as much, having good grades doesn't automatically qualify you as a "Nerd!!!" who therefore needs to be beaten up, the popularity of sports varies wildly depending on where you're living, and where you are living also has a huge impact on which sports are most popular (if any) and movies that take place in high school often exaggerate just for dramatic effect.

The self-esteem part is, unfortunately, largely true. One of the funniest stats I've ever read is that if you look at the breakdown, the one thing American kids consistently rank #1 worldwide in (since it certainly isn't math, science, or reading) is 'self-esteem'. There is a huge movement in the US that believes that if you feel good about yourself, you will perform better, and thus it leads to interesting phenomenon such as sports leagues for little kids where score isn't kept (because losing might make the kids feel bad), getting rid of sports with winners and losers in PE class (in other words, it's all team-building activities, no actual competing teams), giving trophies to everyone in the league (regardless of who performed the best or who actually won), and some schools even petitioning to get rid of grades.

 

[Ryan Hughes]

The first one, which I'm sure many people outside of the US have thought about a lot as well, is: How much is real American high school life like how it's portrayed in entertainment?

The other one I have to ask about just because I'm so completely baffled by it. And that's self-esteem coaching.

Spoiler: Here's an episode of Bullshit! that explains it quite well

The whole time watching the episode I had my jaw on the floor. I'd heard of it before, but only now did I realize what kind of stuff it was. This is real? People really pay money for that? A guy is actually touring America, doing cheap magic tricks while telling kids that they're "special", and actually making them yell "I'm number 1!"???????? Just how big is this business? Do you know any people who buy into this stuff?

From my high-school experience, there is no relation between the fiction and the reality. About half of my teachers were drunk, and we were in the midst of the Meth boom here in Oregon at the time. Many of my friends in School were meth babies or had parents who were addicted. Often, I was smarter than my teachers, so I was given some latitude by the school to do what I saw fit, so I did not cause too much trouble.

Bob is from Massachusetts, nearly 5,500 km away, and his experience could be very different. School policies are all handled at the state level in America, as is most funding. Thus, schools change drastically from state to state, and even from rural to urban to suburban areas. What you see in films is often the suburban schools, which tend to have the most funding per student and lowest crime rates in the surrounding communities.

Life-coaching and self-esteem classes are real things. They got started in America after WWII, when many returning soldiers suffered from PTSD, but the social stigma prevented them from seeking treatment proper. Thus, the self-help and life coaching phenomena was born in somewhat understandable circumstances. However, this has continued and is now a full industry, and has become more and more absurd over time, mostly because its practitioners lack proper psychiatric or medical training. Though, these types of things are again a product of the upper-middle and upper classes.

America has vast divides between the rich and the poor, much more so than any Scandinavian country. So, it helps to remember that much of the media portrays and is intended for the upper-middle and rich classes. The working and poor classes have virtually no voice in American media when compared to the others, with some notable exceptions like the TV show "Roseann."

Anyway I hope this helps you understand, and do not be afraid to ask more is you are curious.

 

[HigherTomorrow]

-snip-

I'm totally curious as to where you went to high school since I live real close to Newark.

 

[bartholen_v1legacy]

snipp

Okay, I just have to ask: what kind of school has 5000 people? They're talking about making a mega-school of a 1000 students here, and that's considered gigantic. In my high school there were probably 500 students, and its size was above average.

The self-esteem part is, unfortunately, largely true. One of the funniest stats I've ever read is that if you look at the breakdown, the one thing American kids consistently rank #1 worldwide in (since it certainly isn't math, science, or reading) is 'self-esteem'. There is a huge movement in the US that believes that if you feel good about yourself, you will perform better, and thus it leads to interesting phenomenon such as sports leagues for little kids where score isn't kept (because losing might make the kids feel bad), getting rid of sports with winners and losers in PE class (in other words, it's all team-building activities, no actual competing teams), giving trophies to everyone in the league (regardless of who performed the best or who actually won), and some schools even petitioning to get rid of grades.

I don't think it's just the US where the "smile or die" mentality has spread. It's just the calibre to which it is taken that nearly frightens me. I've seen that apply to many things: In the US they always seem to go the extra mile.

I have to admit that I was dreading it when I clicked on this topic. I'm actually pleasantly surprised, though.

Glad to hear it.

 

[Remus]

At the high school I went to, some people wished that it was as openly cliche as on TV, including the coaches and some staff who definitely showed more interest in kids of a certain financial background. But those days had died long before I reached high school age. Life was only a popularity contest up through middle school, then after that everyone just kinda stuck to their little cliques and clubs and left each other alone. Our football team was pretty much the losingest team in the state so being on it did not a star make.

We had a couple life coaches visit while I was in school, utter inspirational BS, just a good reason to miss a class period or two (although I was pulled out of one assembly for saying something particularly lewd to a "mean girl" earlier that day). The only full sized lockers were in a short row on the bottom level of the school and a person would have to be anorexic in order to fit inside one. Teasing was frowned upon and payback's a ***** - one kid got a dislocated shoulder from our lead tackle just by generally being a jerk to everyone. There were a few geeks and one was so pathetic in both mannerisms and appearance that he was actually left alone in fear that he might be a Bates/Carrie kind of quiet psychopath. On the rare occasion that teased I made it known that I did not approve, sometimes getting suspended as my reward. Oh, and that lead tackle was a trekkie. One year he put on a full prosthetic klingon costume complete with bat leth. Being about 6'7 he filled in the costume rather well. This garnered him a first page photo in our yearbook that year.

I never went to prom, was and still am very much of an asexual nature. When full human cloning is finally approved I'll be first in line to reproduce through those means.

 

[Dirty Hipsters]

snipp

Okay, I just have to ask: what kind of school has 5000 people? They're talking about making a mega-school of a 1000 students here, and that's considered gigantic. In my high school there were probably 500 students, and its size was above average.

Schools in California.

My city has 3 high schools, and over 9,000 total high school students. I went to the biggest high school, with about 5,000 people. I don't even live in one of the larger cities. Los Angeles has over 100,000 high school students, San Diego and San Jose each have over 50,000. School sizes are absolutely massive here.

 

[Brian Tams]

-Never really had a problem with my old school. For the most part, everyone got along with everybody. The "Clique" is actually a rather large myth. There were individuals who were problems, but that's humanity.
-Its football. Its called football because the ball is one feet exact from tip to tip, and its based off of Rugby Football (you know, the full name of Rugby nobody chooses to remember). American Footballs real name is Gridiron Football. Down here in Texas, High School football is a huge deal.
-Yeah, the self-esteem thing is a huge problem in today's school systems, and has been extraordinarily warped by the school system. Don't get me wrong; self esteem is important. But the whole "Everybody gets a ribbon" thing is bullshit. Learning how to deal with failure is just as important as learning how to crave victory (well, crave isn't the word I'm trying to think of, but I just can't remember it).
-Eh, prom was just another school dance to me. Of course, I'm the second and last child in my family, and my brother was a guy. When I picked up my date for the night, though, her Mom was crazily excited, and it naturally rubbed of on her. Maybe its just a girl thing?

 

[Pariah Dog]

Like everyone else was saying, no, it wasn't like TV, however I have been gut punched in full view of the assistant principal by one of the bench warmers on the football team and he didn't blink. In addition to other random people finding it amusing to grab me by the head and slam my head into my locker when trying to open it. School had a big football rep so these shits got away with murder.

A lot of the self esteem stuff is BS however there is a kernel of truth to it. A lot of times the ones that turn suicidal or even homicidal are ones that tend to be picked on by others. I know I still harbor a lot of resentment for my fellow classmates despite it being over 10 years and would probably leave them gutted in a ditch if the opportunity presented itself.

 

[KarmaTheAlligator]

My class in school had less then 130 people in it, and only 86 graduated.

How the hell do you get anything done with that many people in one class? Where I'm from classes of 30 people are considered very crowded.

 

[runic knight]

No, the media portrayal is exaggerated to stupidity. Yes, within the school I went to, there was clicks of sorts, though they were not well defined and no click picked on other clicks for being other clicks. You had the preppy kids who were also occasionally jocks or nerd, you had band, you had the outsiders and floaters. And by and large no group interacted as a group towards the others. Most people got along well enough with other people and it was always personality and not group that had people fighting.

You had some being jerks and taunting others, you had some partying and getting drunk or getting high, you had some screwing around, but nothing more so then any teenage population in a western culture I imagine. You'd have fights and drama and assholes, but as I have found out since, you can get that same sort of behavior from people well into their 40's in a work environment. So if you ever held a job with a moderately large amount of co-workers and where people didn't want to really be there, you've experience what high school was like.

Proms and dances? No one really gave a shit except because it allowed them an excuse to party after. No one gave a shit who was king, I never even went to prom myself, and about the only thing close to movie-like drama I can remember was someone trying to get some asshat as king along with some very ugly girl. It failed pretty blatantly but people are assholes so I am not surprised by the effort. No one got stuffed into lockers, and by the later half if you even threatened that shit, they cracked down on you hard because of over sensitivity and fear of the next school shooting could be any ill-treated nerd. Football was sort of a social event, but the most the player got was the local authorities looking the other way if catching them drinking.

 

[major_chaos]

I can't speak on the school issues (home school FTW), but in my experience the self-esteem coaching is real and while it isn't widespread, it has created some of the most insufferable people I have ever had to deal with, the kind of idiot who brushes off criticism because you "just don't understand them". You know what, I'm going to use that as an excuse to post this clip, because I love this clip

 

[DefunctTheory]

My class in school had less then 130 people in it, and only 86 graduated.

How the hell do you get anything done with that many people in one class? Where I'm from classes of 30 people are considered very crowded.

As in 'Class of 2005.'

 

[Shoggoth2588]

HIGH-SCHOOL LIFE!

High School for me wasn't terrible but that's because I kept my head down and just tried to get through the fucking thing. Unlike what you see on TV/Movies, three quarters of the student body still look like kids. Granted, they're taller, lankier kids with messed up skin and, patches of fur in weird places but the point is, almost nobody looks like an adult. Secondly (and this might have just been my school) 80% of the student body has ZERO FUCKS to give about school spirit. Another thing you may have noticed about high schools as portrayed on TV/ in movies, sexual activity is a thing that exists but unlike TV and movies, people in my school got pregnant. They still came in too which was kind of hilarious in my opinion. As for bullying, it's more shit-flinging (name calling) and random walk-by punching than locker-stuffing. I was a nerd and I never once got stuck into a locker for example.

SELF-ESTEEM COACHING!

This is a thing but they mainly focus on younger kids. If you're in elementary school, you don't play directly competitive sports because EVERYBODY IS A WINNER. Participation awards are a thing and it kinda makes me want to vomit. It isn't as prevalent now as it was a couple of years ago that I know of but it still exists.

 

[Beffudled Sheep_v1legacy]

-snip-

I'm totally curious as to where you went to high school since I live real close to Newark.

Somewhere in Bayonne. The hell was the name of the place?
I'll get back to you on the name, gotta find my freshman yearbook or something. Been a while since I've been there

 

[Eclectic Dreck]

How common are the mean girls clicks?

Get a large enough group of teens together and every conceivable clique will form. This would be one of the more common ones I'd say where the less common ones are going to be based on fringe activities.

Do nerds really get stuffed into lockers?

I was a nerd and fairly scrawny. No on stuffed me into a locker; however, I did get into a dozen fistfights as a result of bullying. I don't take being bullied well.

Is there really that much competition to be quarterback (or whoever the hell is the lead player, I don't know shit about American footb... sorry, handegg)?

Depends on the school. Most schools aren't lucky enough to have several talented players for the position and thus there isn't much real competition here.

Do proms really kick up that much drama? I really want to know.

Depends on who you ask. But, on the whole, yes. It is a defining social event of the many people's lives at that point and while it ultimately doesn't matter it is impossible to convince a high school kid of this.

 

[Quadocky]

The first one, which I'm sure many people outside of the US have thought about a lot as well, is: How much is real American high school life like how it's portrayed in entertainment? I asked about this from an exchange student who'd been there years ago, but her experience clearly didn't match the stereotype. But considering how much and how bitterly MovieBob, for example, has ranted on his high school experiences, I know it can't all be just exaggeration and stereotypes.

So, just as a person from a different culture, how "realistic" is the depiction of high school in American entertainment? How common are the mean girls clicks? Do nerds really get stuffed into lockers? Is there really that much competition to be quarterback (or whoever the hell is the lead player, I don't know shit about American footb... sorry, handegg)? Do proms really kick up that much drama? I really want to know.

The whole time watching the episode I had my jaw on the floor. I'd heard of it before, but only now did I realize what kind of stuff it was. This is real? People really pay money for that? A guy is actually touring America, doing cheap magic tricks while telling kids that they're "special", and actually making them yell "I'm number 1!"???????? Just how big is this business? Do you know any people who buy into this stuff?

Anyway, enough rambling. Just wanted to know. Thoughts on either or both of these?

In terms of High School depicted in fiction: well every school is different, so there might be one that is like that, or one that is peaceful or one that is even worse!

High School and Middle School can be a really awful experience. I don't know what soured Moviebob on the whole thing, I would say my experience was probably worse, but honestly its not like anything 'bad' happened. (really bad at least, the environment itself really drove me nuts)

The important thing to understand about American Culture is that we have no sense of 'We are just one of many'. In our culture we are the main character of our life story and we essentially compete at being 'the one'. We have a culture that tells us to BE 'the one' and when we cannot achieve it we become failures and depressed. Thus it becomes very easy to make a market off of people telling them they are 'the one' because attempting to become 'the one' is feasibly impossible.