Allow me to introduce myself....

[StormShaun]

I'm Shaun, it's in the name. I speak too fast and sometimes when I try to say hen tie, I usually say hentai.
Trust me it gets me into some bad situations.

Pepsi

 

[username sucks]

My username sucks and I assassinated the governor of Washington with a can of pepsi.

Pineapples

 

[Dalek Caan]

I'm a Woods, and a shitty tree joke( What's 3 3s? A small forest! HAHHAHHAHHAHHAH) and I love to beat raccoons to death with pineapple chunks.

Lamp.

 

[Fijiman]

I'm Fijiman and I hit Caan with a lamp.

ladderball

 

[Headsprouter]

I'm Headsprouter and ladderballs are very difficult to use for ascension.

Tall.

 

[kailus13]

I'm kailus, and I'm fairly tall.

Icing.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I'm Redlin5 and prefer icing to marzipan.

Hotdogs.

 

[Teoes]

Hi, I'm Teoes. You may remember me from such hotdogs commercials as "We love winkies" and "I'll swallow it whole!".

Monstrous.

 

[kailus13]

I'm kailus, and I find some forum posts to be monstrous.

Nail polish.

 

[Fijiman]

I'm Fijiman and I don't use nail polish. Ever.

You're not a waffle

 

[username sucks]

My username sucks and you're not a waffle, you are my nemesis, Fijiman.

Slab

 

[Teoes]

I'm Teoes and this is the concrete slab I carry everywhere with me.

Truffles

 

[Fijiman]

I'm Fijiman and I put truffles in all of username sucks' food.

fart nuggets

 

[Teoes]

I'm Teoes and Fijiman leaves fart nuggets in my food. /sadface

Say my name!

 

[Kae]

I'm some form of sentient life-form and I refuse to say my name, which is not Teoes.

One more time.

 

[Fijiman]

I'm Fijiman and if I have to tell you one more time that pumpkins are not to be put up your nose I'll shove five down your throat.

cats

 

[username sucks]

My username sucks and I have a specially trained squad of hit-cats at my disposal, so you better watch out.

The moon

 

[Fijiman]

I'm Fijiman and I'm not on the moon.

fatal diseases designed specifically to kill Username sucks

 

[username sucks]

My username sucks and the fatal disease specifically designed by Fijiman to kill me was a success. It then turned me into a sentient zombie with the same thoughts, memories, and personality. The rotting flesh is a bit of a problem, but at least it is tasty.

Missiles designed to specifically seek out Fijiman.