Am I wrong to do this?

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SlaveNumber23

A WordlessThing, a ThinglessWord
Aug 9, 2011
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As long as you plan on staying friends and trust yourself to dismiss any romantic/sexual opportunities that arise, go for it. If I were her parents I wouldn't like it one bit though, you really need to go out of your way to prove yourself honorable to them and even then they probably won't be 100% comfortable with it.

Her parents will probably think you are just another guy trying to take advantage of her, I don't doubt that you are an exception to this but they will, its unavoidable. As long as you do keep it clean there shouldn't be any trouble though.
 

NoeL

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May 14, 2011
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I'm guessing she either wants a piece of you, or you're legitimately cool. Most likely the former, so let her down easy. :p

I'm surprised you'd want to hang out in the first place. 14 yo girls are annoying as fuck... although I had a 13 yo internet friend when I was 22, and she was bearable... or "is", I should say. She's also now 18, and we still chat. That one was an investment ;D
 

PatrickXD

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Aug 13, 2009
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I would say don't do it. If you want to meet her in person, go with a large group of people - I don't know much about WoW but I'm sure you could find some like minded individuals who would be down to gather and head to the cinema.
Failing that, next time there's a convention in your area or perhaps if there's a local games club, meet up there. Make it something that involves people of many different ages and origins.
A guy and a girl at a cinema? That's a typical first date scenario, and whether either of you intend it or not, that's pretty much what it'll be.
 

DrunkOnEstus

In the name of Harman...
May 11, 2012
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I really hate the whole permeation of the "pedo" stigma in modern culture. I've fallen victim to the thought process, and all the shows on TV and ubiquity of the Internet just makes it more prevalent. I re-read Huckleberry Finn lately and it's amazing how impossible it would be these days to have a modern Huckleberry Finn befriend a much older person (never mind the race thing) without all kinds of insane allegations that the guy is automatically sexually attracted to children. I can't imagine the gap between generations or lack of communication has ever been so wide and vast before.

I may have drifted off topic, but my point is that to an extent you kind of have to play the cards that society deals you. There are many ways to get in all kinds of shit for this regardless of pure and innocent intentions. If it were me personally, I'd weigh whether or not this person could potentially be a very close friend and enrich your life, making it worth all the potential repercussions.
 

Mr F.

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Jul 11, 2012
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BanicRhys said:
Okay, I wrote this post and it was way too long, so here's the abridged version.

I'm a 19 year old male.
I became friends with a girl on a certain MMO early this year.
She's 14 years old.
We haven't really video chatted or anything, just email, in game chat and the occasional Ventrilo session.
Recently, she's stated that she wants to meet me in real life for the first time by seeing a movie with me.

Let me make this clear, I am not asking if I should date her. I simply want to know if it would be wrong/weird/illegal (somehow) to be friends with her.
Pends if she has any funky ideas or not.

Regardless, I really really fucking wouldn't. That just sounds like a way of getting the stuffing kicked out of you due to a misunderstanding. Seriously.

Society is just like that.

So no, It would not be wrong. It would not be illegal. It would probably be very weird and it just sounds... Like a horrendously bad idea.
 

MeChaNiZ3D

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Aug 30, 2011
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Well if it weren't for the clarification at the end, I would have said "No, that's perfectly fine".

But with it I say "Are you f***ing serious?", because if it's just friendship, it's just seeing a movie, there's nothing else involved, not even the implication of anything else, I can't believe you didn't know what 99% of people were going to say in this thread. You have over 800 posts. Come on, you know no-one is seriously going to say "No, that's inexcusable, you should hang your head in shame".

You're 19. Hardly pedophile age range. You're seeing a movie. Hardly illegal or even morally grey. You're already friends. She instigated it. There is virtually nothing about this scenario I even find concerning, except for the suspicious luck that you befriended someone on the internet and they lived within seeing a movie distance.

And I'm not even going to get into "wrong is subjective" because that throws everything out the window, even the law.

EDIT: Wow. I feel the need to amend my post, it appears opinions aren't as cut-and-dried as I thought. Some people actually think she is trying to have a relationship with you, that you intend to do something intimate to her, that she is going to misrepresent you to her parents or any number of other things. I stand my ground, those are all ridiculous accusations as I understand the situation.
 

sky14kemea

Deus Ex-Mod
Jun 26, 2008
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I think if you want to do this, both of you should bring a friend with you. Or the parents thing if you want.

The thing is, if you've never seen her, who's to say she really is only 14? It's a long shot, but I think both of you should be careful.
 

Myndnix

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Aug 11, 2012
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Nothing wrong with it at all. In fact, I don't see why you even need to ask. But I suppose it never hurts to be safe.
 

krazykidd

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Mar 22, 2008
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Don't do it . It's a bad idea . Better safe than sorry . Plus what could you possibly have in common with a 14 year old girl . You are 19. IT'S A TRAP ! [small] seriously though , don't do it , better safe than sorry .[/small]
 

Shadow-Phoenix

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Mar 22, 2010
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I don't see what's wrong with being her friend since I'm friends with my next door neighbours 13yr old kid and me and him play Minecraft over Xbox live and have some laughs and he's a pretty smart guy for his age compared to when I was young.
 

Megacherv

Kinect Development Sucks...
Sep 24, 2008
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Zantos said:
excalipoor said:
Zantos said:
You don't want to know what I thought.

I don't even know if what I thought is a real thing.
The law of Internet dictates that if you start a thought, you have to finish it. Spit it out!
Is that a real rule? Is that why Youtube comments are so horrible, because the people leaving the comments have no choice? That explains a lot.

Also it was World of Sexcraft, where grinding means a different thing that no one complains about. I don't know if it is a real thing, I am also not willing to type that into Google.
Surely it would be called 'World of Whorecraft'...
 

Atrocious Joystick

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May 5, 2011
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Be pragmatic about is. Don't listen to anyone telling you not to listen to what peope think, be exremely careful of what people think.

Fact is you're an adult planning to meet up with a Child that you met through the net. Even if your intentions are honorable. You have to realise that this could end extremely badly for you. She might believe there is more than just friendship and she might tell her parents anything when you snub her. Or her parents might just draw their own conclusions. In any of those scenarios the police could be called.

Sex crimes, especially involving minors are "special" in that even if you are found innocent by a court you are never going to be innocent in the eyes of the public. Do you want to have to tell your parents that you're suspected of having sex with a 14 year old girl? Do you want her parents to assume that?

Perhaps she has Brothers. I have a sister that is around that age. I would not hesitate to beat the ever living shit out of a 19 year old guy who came to pick her up. And I'm not a violent person.
 
Jun 13, 2009
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All I could think about reading this thread is how incredibly inappropriate the OPs avatar is for the subject matter..

But no, seriously, I'm sure that's fine. Especially if her parents have agreed as well.
 

MeChaNiZ3D

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Aug 30, 2011
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Megacherv said:
Zantos said:
excalipoor said:
Zantos said:
You don't want to know what I thought.

I don't even know if what I thought is a real thing.
The law of Internet dictates that if you start a thought, you have to finish it. Spit it out!
Is that a real rule? Is that why Youtube comments are so horrible, because the people leaving the comments have no choice? That explains a lot.

Also it was World of Sexcraft, where grinding means a different thing that no one complains about. I don't know if it is a real thing, I am also not willing to type that into Google.
Surely it would be called 'World of Whorecraft'...
Or...Whoreld of Whorecraft...!
 

Techno Squidgy

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Nov 23, 2010
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Jerram Fahey said:
I'm guessing she either wants a piece of you, or you're legitimately cool. Most likely the former, so let her down easy. :p

I'm surprised you'd want to hang out in the first place. 14 yo girls are annoying as fuck... although I had a 13 yo internet friend when I was 22, and she was bearable... or "is", I should say. She's also now 18, and we still chat. That one was an investment ;D
Why don't you have a seat over there...
 

Starik20X6

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Oct 28, 2009
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Nothing wrong with being friends with her. The only thing that I'd possibly be worried about would be her trying to do something, you say no, so she says you tried to do something. But I figure you know her enough to know if that's a concern or a possibility.

Oh, and I think it'd probably be a good idea to video chat at least once, just to get a proper feel for each other before you hang out in the real world.
 

dogenzakaminion

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Jun 15, 2010
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Your avatar doesn't exactly instill confidence (looking at the comments it seems everyone has commented on this, but damn dude, that avatar!)...but you seem to have a good plan. Make sure her parents know or meet you, make your intentions clear, and in general just be careful about how you approach the situation. The people here are all pretty relaxed and understanding about this kind of thing, others might not be. Wouldn't want you to be labelled as a sex predator because some asshat got the wrong idea.
 

Legion

Were it so easy
Oct 2, 2008
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BanicRhys said:
JoJo said:
In this particular situation though, if you do meet her in real life you should make sure it's all above board: in a public place, parents know where she is etc.
Yeah, I initially had a hard time getting her to inform her parents about me but I managed to convince her by saying I wouldn't meet her unless her parents met me too.
In this kind of situation, I'd say there isn't anything wrong then.

You aren't being some creepy adult trying to sneakily meet a child. You have told her that you want everything to be "above board" and would like her parents to approve of it.

That said, I do not believe that it is necessarily wise to be friends with this girl in real life. There are a lot of situations where this could go horribly wrong, not to mention the fact you had to convince her to tell her parents shows that she is not particularly mature.