An Open Letter to Off-Topic

[JoJo]

[Dancing video]

No! Nooooo! Jo! JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

...

[sub]Screw it, I want the fun [/sub]

Noooooo! Too many memories flooding back, my Little Sister... *breaks out into dance and song routine*

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Another Snip bites the dust!

Snipetty Snipetty Snip

Well it seems it is my turn again for a clever segway.
Hey JoJo, you know what they say about being on the wrong side?
If you can't beat them...

 

[Evil Smurf]

Vault would have a field day with this thread. Anyway, you asked for kitteh? YOU GET KITTEH
http://data.whicdn.com/images/14288688/cat-cute-kitten-music-photo-Favim.com-134069_large.jpg

 

[The White Hunter]

Snip

Cap'n JoJo I think we, the fun police, should start enforcing fun instead of punishing it.

Fun is now MANDATORY

Another Snip bites the dust!

Snipetty Snipetty Snip

Well it seems it is my turn again for a clever segway.
Hey JoJo, you know what they say about being on the wrong side?
If you can't beat them...

All that evil we were doing, we must have been...
-shades-
stone cold crazy!!! YEAAAAH!

 

[lacktheknack]

Ooh, I think I remember when this happened before!

A couple years back, the forums got hostile. They DID chill out again after a while, but you sometimes just have to suck it up and hide in Forum Games until the storm is over.

Until then, I support the liberal use of giant ducks.

http://in2eastafrica.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/Tower-Bridge-swung-open-today-to-allow-the-giant-duck-through.jpg

 

[Phuctifyno]

Clearly the only answer is to abandon the concept of traditional adverserial debate and make it a rule that all dissagreements in off-topic must be resolved with a rap battle.

Shut'cho face, dawg
Rap battles solve nuthin'
I oughta stuff yo' maw
with an oven-baked muffin

Battle raps are better
It's a scientific fact
Semantic manic panic
N***a, you can deal wit 'dat [small]...'dat[/small] [sub]...'dat[/sub] [sub][sub]...'dat[/sub][/sub] [sub][sub][sub]...'dat[/sub][/sub][/sub]

[drops mic]

 

[JoJo]

If you can't beat them...

Gah, my life and it's fun-crushing purpose has been entirely destroyed, what can I do now? What is the Law if it is not just?

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Snip of ages

Allow me,, to lay down at your feet a thread that has changed the tides, a thread that is fun, the very essence of fun, in which even the fearsome fun police has been persuaded to join in on the pure, mindless fun.

BEHOLD THE THREAD OF FUN, RISEN FROM THE ASHES TO DANCE AGAIN, STRONGER THAN EVER.

Join us in the fun times once more, so we can take back this forum.

And yes, this is the real life, so I dedicate this song to you:

 

[Calibanbutcher]

I just stay out of any topic with more than four pages.

This policy is serving me well so far.

So you stay out of threads with more than four pages?
Well, care to join us in this thread then?

 

[Risingblade]

tl;dr

The answer is more cats with lasers on their heads and pie

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

Fappy, your new avatar confuses me. Why is the grandmother from Devil Hunter Yohko abusing you? Why?

OT: I'm with you Fappy. I'm getting burned out. There are threads that I wanted to post in recently. I clicked on them and... the already brewing shitstorms just made me go "meh, not worth it". I hate feeling like that.

Also, I feel like some of these very polarized topics are forcing me into a more extreme position than I'm comfortable with. I'm a Third Wave feminist. I like sexy women (and men) in my video games. The new Tomb Raider game looks great - I like (almost) everything I've heard about it. I want to be cheering the success of a sexy female protagonist, not arguing about Mario games (which I don't like or play).

 

[JoJo]

Cap'n JoJo I think we, the fun police, should start enforcing fun instead of punishing it.

Fun is now MANDATORY

You are right Officer SkarKrow, only now have I realised the true magic of friendship fun! There's no time to lose, we must bring the good news to all those poor trolls and flamers who still wallow in silly political catfights over gender and words. Only through the authority of the Fun Police can we bring fun back to it's rightful place on the forums!

snip

You have shown us the true way of the Escapist, for that I am eternally grateful. I am truly in your debt, Sir Calibanbutcher.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Snip

Cap'n JoJo I think we, the fun police, should start enforcing fun instead of punishing it.

Fun is now MANDATORY

Another Snip bites the dust!

Snipetty Snipetty Snip

Well it seems it is my turn again for a clever segway.
Hey JoJo, you know what they say about being on the wrong side?
If you can't beat them...

Spoiler

All that evil we were doing, we must have been...
-shades-
stone cold crazy!!! YEAAAAH!

Spoiler

If you can't beat them...

Gah, my life and it's fun-crushing purpose has been entirely destroyed, what can I do now? What is the Law if it is not just?

Spoiler

It seems to me that the fun police was the loser in the end.

But because of that, we all have gained something great and grandiose even.
We have gained FUN.

But I know what to do with your law that banishes all forms of fun:
TEAR IT UP

Cap'n JoJo I think we, the fun police, should start enforcing fun instead of punishing it.

Fun is now MANDATORY

You are right Officer SkarKrow, only now have I realised the true magic of friendship fun! There's no time to lose, we must bring the good news to all those poor trolls and flamers who still wallow in silly political catfights over gender and words. Only through the authority of the Fun Police can we bring fun back to it's rightful place on the forums!

snip

You have shown us the true way of the Escapist, for that I am eternally grateful. I am truly in your debt, Sir Calibanbutcher.

And I could not wish for a greater honour than to be recognized by you.

Now, let us shape these forums together for a better tomorrow.

To bring back Fun to the internet.

 

[Evil Smurf]

tl;dr

The answer is more cats with lasers on their heads and pie

What about normal cats with bread on there heads?
http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSTbItDnBwRSzR5ibmw5BOFy1h-zscmphEUZpt9YEKi46kdtSJr8g

 

[Risingblade]

tl;dr

The answer is more cats with lasers on their heads and pie

What about normal cats with bread on there heads?
http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSTbItDnBwRSzR5ibmw5BOFy1h-zscmphEUZpt9YEKi46kdtSJr8g

Just bread? I can't eat a cat sandwich with just bread and pussy cat D:

 

[The White Hunter]

But because of that, we all have gained something great and grandiose even.
We have gained FUN.

But I know what to do with your law that banishes all forms of fun:
TEAR IT UP

You're a maniac! A MANIAC I SAY!


And we have not lost, we have reformed and redeveloped ourselves to enforce the magic of funw ith a furious iron fist!

 

[Calibanbutcher]

tl;dr

The answer is more cats with lasers on their heads and pie

What about normal cats with bread on there heads?
http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSTbItDnBwRSzR5ibmw5BOFy1h-zscmphEUZpt9YEKi46kdtSJr8g

Just bread? I can't eat a cat sandwich with just bread and pussy cat D:

I am truly sorry for what I am about to do, I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

"What, you don't like eating pussy?"

Spoiler: Eating pussy done correctly

I am just so very sorry about that...

 

[Darken12]

I'm sorry, but I just don't understand what the problem is. Whenever I see a mod locking down a thread or people complaining about too many threads like that, I have to ask "Uh... what?"

If you thought a thread was getting too ugly then... don't read it? Don't post in it? I fail to see what the problem is, really. It's not like angriness is going to spill over to other threads (any more than it already does), and just shutting down a thread because it got too... what? Too popular? Too negative? Too angry? Is a completely baffling idea to me. If people flame, you moderate them. Sounds simple to me.

And just for the record, I'm not arguing against fun or anything like that, I am saying that there is at least one person who just plain doesn't get what the huge problem is.

 

[Evil Smurf]

tl;dr

The answer is more cats with lasers on their heads and pie

What about normal cats with bread on there heads?
http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSTbItDnBwRSzR5ibmw5BOFy1h-zscmphEUZpt9YEKi46kdtSJr8g

Just bread? I can't eat a cat sandwich with just bread and pussy cat D:

How about a burger?
http://catboxdeli.files.wordpress.com/2007/02/logo.jpg?w=455

 

[Fijiman]

The only real option is to have an Escapist-wide Rockem Sockem mech suit free-for-all and beat the crap out of each other until all of (or most of) the aggression is out of our systems.