I think your Formspring does that quite well, AylaAylaine said:
OT: I'm straight, but I will admit to a man crush on David Tennant.
any homosexual/bisexuals here on the escapist?
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OT: I'm straight, but I will admit to a man crush on David Tennant.
I'm not a sex addict and I'm bisexual. I'm attracted to both genders. I don't find everyone I meet sexually attractive. There are some people who are so emotionally connected to a friend that they could never think of romantically because they're not a gender that they are attracted to physically. I can be a attracted to the personality and the shell doesn't really matter to me. I don't go looking around to have sex with both male and female individuals. I just just don't rule romantic partners based on gender.Lardo said:
OK, I guess you're a perfect example of a type of person Mr Cwtchy was talking about. You're searching for a soul mate, whatever gender he may be. Still, I just don't get it. AFAIK, sexual orientation is not something you acquire, but something you discover. In other words, one can't become gay, he is born like this. Therefore, sexual orientation is something physiological, not psychological. It has something to do with the balance of male/female hormones, and if the balance is disturbed, one's gender identity becomes screwed up and he becomes attracted to people of the same sex. So, it just doesn't seem possible to me for a person to be bisexual for physiological reasons.mimssy said:
I don't see gender identity as being "screwed up." Sex is biological. Gender is cultural. Gender identity is something that is learned unlike sex organs that you're born with. I've was never taught to be straight and I've been attracted to people first then sex later. I can't really answer your question. Did I choose to like both genders? No. Was I taught to like both genders? No. Have I known anything else? No. In truth, I wasn't aware that I was in the minority until I was in middle school. I didn't really understand that most people only were attracted to members of the opposite sex. It's not like I was exposed to many gay people (none that I can think of until I was in my teens) nor were my parents particularly liberal, so such topics were never discussed.Lardo said:
Of course you don't. I understand that you consider your situation absolutely normal, otherwise you'd probably have done something about it already.mimssy said:
Well, I don't agree with you on this one. You're saying, genitalia and gender identity are totally unrelated things, because you develop genitalia before you are born and learn your gender identity later, while growing up. That doesn't make sense to me. Like I said, I think sexual orientation is not something you can learn.
That doesn't change the fact that you are in the minority. For me, one thing is obvious: males and females have genitalia that biologically fit each other. Females cannot procreate without males, and sex is primarily a means for procreation, therefore males are meant to be sexually attracted to females and vice versa. I'm not saying that you being attracted to males is a tragedy of epic proportions, but I definitely see it as a "screwed up situation".
Gender identity is not sexual orientation. Gender identity is what gender you identify with and what traits are considered characteristic of the sexes (what is masculine, what is feminine). That is learned based on socialization. You don't learn your personality traits, you are born with them; however, you learn to associate them with a certain sex. Biologically, I am female; however, if I were to list all my personality traits, I'd be considered more masculine. Gender identity doesn't determine sexual orientation.Lardo said:
I guess not, but they are certainly related somehow.mimssy said:
Period.
No!
True, but irrelevant. Let's say I'm a man who likes to cook and wear make-up. Sure, that doesn't mean I'm not seeing myself as a man, it means that I don't give a damn that people consider those things to be feminine.
First of all, I'm sorry. I was under the impression that you were male. Should have checked your profile first thing.
Again, that is true, but that just not what "gender identity" is. The way I see it, it's simple: do you feel like a woman? If yes, then your gender identity is female. It doesn't matter whether you like jeans, t-shirts, boxing and other things that are generally considered "masculine" or not. Gender identity is about how you perceive yourself, not about how others perceive you.