Of course it is, but you went straight from speaking about intent (with your legal system comparison) into saying that he was trying to hurt/demean the woman that he was playing against and therefore inadvertently hurt others.JimB said:How so? You don't think it's possible to accidentally hurt someone?
You say its like accidentally shooting the person next to the guy you were trying to kill.
I say its more akin to someone getting angry at you for shooting someone else with a cap gun.
Sure it looked and sounded like a real gun at first, but give it a second and you realise that its more innocent than what you took it to be and it really had nothing to do with you in the first place.
Fair enough, you can indeed say it, bad choice of words on my part. It doesn't change the fact that you're wrong. It is not his words that have hurt you, it is your choice, influenced by your bias that causes you to be hurt. If there was evidence to suggest his words referenced rape in any way rather than being a piece of (not so witty) banter then I'd agree with the statement. The words he used however are ambiguous as to what they reference (leaning towards innocence) and therefore you don't get to decide that he was wrong to say them.I hate to say this, because I feel like you and I are getting along pretty well and I don't want to ruin that, but with all due respect, this is an area I just can't bend on: Yes, it is okay to say "His words hurt me." It is at least as okay to say that as it is for the Microsoft representative to say "Just let it happen, it will be over soon."
Otherwise you could berate someone for wearing the same cologne as your attacker. The smell reminded you of the incident and in turn caused you mental anguish. And lets be fair, they say the sense of smell is one of the biggest memory triggers.
I don't think there's as much misogyny in gaming as people suggest. I think there's a lack of women making games for women, and an excess of men making games for men. Misogyny no doubt exists in gaming as it does anywhere, as does misandry in its own ways, but its not the type which people consciously express. Its the type of sexism which is based on outdated stereotypes which are still affecting marketting teams and publishers. This kind of sexism is not grounds to believe that someone would joke about rape.You don't think there's an endemic undercurrent of misogyny in gaming and a rape culture in the West that informs his beliefs? And I know that probably sounds smug, but no, really, I'm asking. Do you disagree that those things are true and form part of the context of the situation?
As for the second part of your question. Fuck no. As in fuck no I do not think our culture has:
"prevalent attitudes and practices [which] normalize, excuse, tolerate, or even condone rape."
-Thanks Wikipedia
Our culture classes rape as one of the worst crimes that can be commited, just under child molestation which is just rape directed at children. I really don't think anything more needs to be said here, the idea that our culture is in any way a rape culture is bullshit. Unless of course you're talking about male rape which as you've already mentioned gets brushed aside as either never happening, being funny when it does happen or the victim being "lucky" because the chick was hot.