Avatar: The Lost Avatar - an interest thread

[VuvuZelaMan]

Great, the forum nommed my post...

/nompost

EDIT: Well, I might as well note that it seems like we've now got three characters who have an aspect of their character being actively hidden at some point, if I count correctly. I find this interesting...

 

[iThinkCat]

Spoiler: Character Sheet

Name: Masamune

Gender: Male

Age: 27

Element: Spirit

Skills: Master Spirit Bender, Freerunning, Master Forger

Appearance: Standing at 5?11,? with raven black hair, Masamune has the kind of face you?re likely to forget- unless you look into his eyes. They say the eyes are the windows into the soul, and if so, one shudders at what those eyes the color of ice show. Masamune dresses in simple, loose robes that hang off his tan body, and are cut off at the shoulders as to not get in his way. He usually dresses in muted colors- gray, maybe a little black trim. Finally, a large backpack hangs on his shoulders, carrying everything Masamune needs to apply his craft.

Personality: Masamune is often vibrant and outgoing, and can be found surrounded with a group of newly-made friends, but at times can be introspective and reticent, occasionally breaking all contact with the human world to explore the Spirit Realm. Whenever Masamune sets himself to a task, he will pursue it to the end.

Background:
Fire. Such a simple little word, isn?t it? Four letters to describe something so voracious, so ravenous, that it will not stop until it has consumed everything in its path or has been consumed itself. So simple a term to depict so complex an entity.

Fire. It?s all Masamune remembers. As a child, Masamune?s father would always go to town to trade with the local Earth Kingdom Merchants. Whenever he came back, Masamune?s brothers and sisters would swarm him to see what he brought home. It was usually some gifts from the grateful families that Masamune?s father healed with his spiritbending, when no one else could. They did not have much, being farmers, but what they had, they made due with. And they were happy. It all ended with the smell of smoke. Masamune woke up, the acrid smell of smoke filling his entire body, cocooning him, suffocating him. His mother burst through the door, shielding Masamune and removing the smoke from his lungs with her waterbending. The other children were in the field and had died immediately, but Masamune could still be saved. His mother rushed him down into the basement, where she stood guard over him until the flames devoured her. Protected by the dying power of his mother?s spirit, Masamune sat in the basement, slowly starving, his only source of water an ashen pool. The house had collapsed, trapping him inside for a week before his cries were heard by his father?s friend, who came to see what had happened to Masamune?s family. He rescued Masamune and taught the child his trade, so that he might have something to feed himself with when the boy went out into the world. Masamune spent 19 years, honing his Spiritbending and mastering the art of the forge.

Masamune finally left his father?s friend and set out into the world, concerned only with revenge. For two years, Masamune assassinated heads of state and other high ranking Fire Nation officials with nary a scratch, each with a note over their lips with the characters for ?He who cries out without noise,? earning him the nickname ?The Silenced One.? Then, Masamune received the letter with that single White Lotus stamped on it. His heart stopped. He had been found out! He read the letter with shaking fingers, collapsing with relief at the message contents. He closed the letter, sealing inside a chemical used in his forge that would combust should it touch air, placed it at the bottom of his pack, and set off to San Xei.

Whew! Finished! Sorry for taking so long, my computer got hit with a virus and I had to do a system restore. Then I had to wait 3 hours for the damn thing to defrag itself, teaching me to do this a little more often. Enjoy.

Time for me to review your character:

So first thing, very good character. I like it. Though I don't know if you know this, but if you paste from Word the ( ' )s aren't displayed properly and show up as (?)s. Just a fyi. It kind of perturbs me every time I write up a character and have to go through and locate all my ( ' )s and re-type them.

Everything else I can't complain about really, but I have tip for you. Spirit benders are much more rare than the other elements and although it is passed down through one's hereditary, everyone has the recessive genes for it. So chances of one's father also being a spirit bender is like one in a million. You don't have to change it, but just know that it's very rare. I do need to update the OP to mention this, my bad.

Also, know that in order to spirit bend one must have a strong control on their "inner self". You could call these one's emotions or even as broad as to say their personality. Notice Guru Pathik and Ty Lee generally had the same carefree outlook on life. In order to truly be in touch with the spirit realm, you must let go of worldly things. Now Ty Lee was still caught up in teenage dreams, probably why she would never be able to master all the chakras like the Guru has. Much like the monk ways of the Air Nomads, spirit bending is a way of life, more so as it directly reflects the state of your "inner self" when used.

Last thing, I'd like if you added to your background (or in skills if you want) some examples of the style of spirit bending he uses. Spirit is one of those elements that could be over powered if I give someone mastery over everything it can accomplish. Do you focus more on the "self" aspect (martial abilities, pain numbing on yourself, and the like), the "others" aspect (healing, communicating, aura reading, etc.), or the "spiritual" aspect (astral projection, spirit communicating, and even partial clairvoyance (I'll have to help you this if you choose the spiritual path)). Also say something about the chakras, like which ones you've opened and haven't opened. The picture below should sum up the chakras neatly enough. Keep in mind though that the chakras must be opened in order, from bottom to top.

Spoiler: Chakras

That should be about it. Sorry for not including this info in the OP. I feel like this was mostly my mistake. I should have thought more about what a spirit bending character would encompass. Stupid me.

 

[iThinkCat]

Spoiler: Character try ^_^

Name: Akemi (snow ? she doesn?t usually use her real name)



Age: 21



Element: Spirit and water (spirit connection is so far unknown to her)



Skills: Water bending (rarely used)

Dagger

Mixed martial arts

Throwing needles

Cooking (natural talent to use few ingredients and make nice practical meal)



Appearance: Akemi is 5'2" and shapely. She has lightly tanned skin, full, rosy lips and dark brown wavy hair which flows down to her waist. She has large eyes framed with long black lashes, but she hides them with a long fringe and a tattered bandage. She rarely shows them to anyone as they are so unusual. Her left eye is brown and speckled with gold while her right is a deep and stormy blue (this is to do with her spirit connection. The brown eye will develop to see the spirit world).

Her clothes are simple and are usually shades of grey blue and tattered brown. Not overly worried about appearances, Akemi often wears the clothes of a man, a long-sleeved, thigh length tunic, a dark belt to hold her weapons and accessories, tight leggings and knee length brown boots.

Her small dagger is silver, with an intricate design with she created in resemblance of her mother water tribe engagement necklace.



Personality: Akemi is somewhat a loner. She is not shy, but she prefers to keep her opinions to herself unless the situation makes it impossible to do so. Whilst being so introverted Akemi can be quite a witty and wryly character.

Akemi is used to living alone. Her 12 years alone have made her stubborn, strong and resilient, yet there is a soft element to her which she chooses to hide behind a tough facade. Just like her mother once did, Akemi has a caring personality, and though she endeavours to hide it she often gets too emotionally involved with the people she meets. Her heart is easily broken.



Background: Akemi was just 7 years old when her home on the outskirts of the southern pole continent was attacked by a small band of fire nation soldier searching for water benders. Her parents, knowing that she was a bender hid her and urged her to run when she had the chance. In the battle which ensued her father was killed and her mother stolen. Akemi was forced to watch as her parents were torn away from her forever. Once the chance arose Akemi slipped from her hiding place and ran into the snowy landscape. Since that day she has repressed any memories of her childhood and has harboured a hatred for the fire nation.



Shrouded in mystery, and a long way from home, Akemi travelled to the Earth Kingdom to escape her past. Quickly learning that the world could be a dangerous place she found members of the Earth Kingdom villages she visited to teach her skills in defence and survival.



By the age of 16, Akemi had began to infiltrate and spy on fire nation encampments, claiming to be a blind beggar she was easily able to go un-noticed. As the years flew by, she became more and more involved in small rebel groups. She began spreading tales of the fire nation?s violent war and encouraging rebellious behaviour. Never staying in one place for long, it was easy enough for her to infiltrate and destroy small encampments and then escape to a far off village. Now at the age of 21, she is ready to go to war and fight those that stole her parents away from her.



Receiving an unexpected letter, sealed with a single waxen lotus Akemi is now sent to the Rockslide Tavern in the small town of Xan Sei - Earth Kingdom

Ok, so I didn?t quite like my first attempt, it was written at 12:29am so no real surprises there

Really looking forward to some feedback

Review:

There are a couple big flaws in your character. The most obvious one being that your choose two elements. I know it says it's only her eye really, but that's just not how the universe of Avatar works. Just the same as one can not be black skinned and white skinned at the same time, no person other than the Avatar can manifest two elements. Just simply choose one or the other and make the necessary adjustments.

The second is more a lore issue in your background. At this point in time the Fire Nation has not attacked the Southern Water Tribe. They are the smallest threat to the Fire Nation and hold little to no tactical advantage to conquer before the Air Nomad (in search of the Avatar) and the Earth Kingdom (for it's extremely powerful armies). Both Water Tribes would have been left alone for the moment, but the Northern Water Tribe took to the offensive against the Fire Nation, provoking a retaliation. The Fire Nation does not attack the Southern Water Tribe for another 20 years, at which point they begin the raids blood bender Hama talked about (and was captured in). Just make a small change to realign it with canon.

Also, in your section about your rebel experience, I would prefer if you did not say you infiltrated or spied. Neither of those fall under you skill sets. Now if you want to cook a nice big pot of stew that gets an entire Fire Nation army sick the day before a battle, causing them to lose horribly, by all means go ahead. (even more comedic if you didn't mean to and somehow accidentally became a legend, but that's just me spouting ideas) Actually that reminds me...

Anyways, your character is good except for those few things. It was written very well and I look forward to see the final version of your character.

Spoiler: TO EVERYONE!!!

Just thought I'd mention this, but I will be keeping the tone of this story and RP in the same spirit of the show. There will be comic relief and you will meet many interesting characters to say the least. Some mature themes will be prevalent in the RP, just as the show did, but comedy is welcomed. That said, please don't make your characters all a stick in the mud. Shouting "SNEAK ATTACK" at the top of your lungs before attacking someone head on is a perfectly acceptable tactic (results may vary).

 

[iThinkCat]

SNIPPED TO ALLOW REFERENCE

As I continue to think of Riichi's character and post-defection experience, I wonder if I should drop the foraging point and make him a master of disguise. Not only would it be more effective, but it seems like someone who's spent most of their life having half of his ethnicity being the ostracized one should have developed more means to disguise that for the purposes of getting along.

Further, I'm starting to think Riichi might try to distance himself from the Fire Nation's ideals given they murdered his parents, and I see that going along better with more of a focus on disguise and subterfuge than well-roundedness and independent survivability. (Also, the fact that Riichi had to work to survive and then looted the Fire Nation supply lines makes the foraging point rather out of place.)

Any comments on this line of thought?

EDIT: Oh, and one more bit: Does "hidden wind/air" translate into (Pinyin) Chinese as "Qian Qi"? Just curious on that one; it has a double meaning that would relate to Riichi, and the Internet says that translates about right.

EDIT: Well, I might as well note that it seems like we've now got three characters who have an aspect of their character being actively hidden at some point, if I count correctly. I find this interesting...

You're welcome to change your character. I'll look it over after the changes have been made, and you do make some good points.

About your name, I think your should always trust the Internet. I know I do., Seriously though, I don't know any form of Chinese. I've just been making stuff that sounds like it, and it seems to work just fine.

Also, note the spoiler to everyone in my last post. Just a fyi.

 

[Mookie_Magnus]

Name: Ki-Myu Inokaze

Gender: Male

Age: 20

Element: Fire

Skills: Firebending, Archery, Straight sword, Master of Strategy/Tactics

Appearance: Blond-red hair which is held in a traditional Fire-nation style tail, golden eyes, and slightly pale skin. He stands at 5'10, weighing 150 pounds of lean muscle.

Personality: Ki-Myu is a brilliant and kindhearted warrior, though young, he possesses great skill in both combat and martial planning. Being a Firebender, however, he is often prone to aggressive outbursts, and rash decisions, sometimes being favorable, however.
He has an affinity towards members of both genders, not caring whether someone is male or female, and looking at the natural beauty of the person, both physical and of personality. He is affectionate and protective, a loyal ally to any who befriend him.

Background: Ki-Myu is the child of a tryst between a former Air-Nomad, and a Fire Nation Colonel. A year before the attack on the Air Temples, his mother eloped with his father, choosing love over her spiritual ascension, and leaving the Nomads to live with her beloved.

To stay hidden after word of the attacks, his mother kept her bending hidden from others in their home in the Fire-Nation colonies. Ki-Myu was the first-born child of this union, having his brother, Mazin, an Airbender, a year his junior, who also had to keep his bending a secret. And his sister, three years his junior, Nyaa-Mi as another child. Nyaa-Mi had no bending abilities, much to the relief of their mother, who feared that she would be an Airbender as well.

When some of the villagers discovered Mazin's Airbending abilities, a mob was assembled to take him and bring him to the local militia outpost to be brought to the proper authorities. To keep his brother safe and out of harm, Ki-Myu and their father snuck Mazin away to the home of their grandmother, a powerful Firebender 'Witch' who lived in the mountains. Here, Mazin would be safe, and would learn much from her regarding bending and its origin and mechanics.

This incident stirred something in Ki-Myu, however. He could not stand by while the Fire Nation did this. With much regret, he left his son in the care of his mother and father, his wife having died in childbirth, and left to join a resistance movement. He only has one current experience in battle with the resistance, but it was enough to deal a severe blow to a Fire-Army outpost, thanks to some clever planning and tactics that Ki-Myu made in an on-the-spot judgement.

 

[VuvuZelaMan]

You're welcome to change your character. I'll look it over after the changes have been made, and you do make some good points.

About your name, I think your should always trust the Internet. I know I do., Seriously though, I don't know any form of Chinese. I've just been making stuff that sounds like it, and it seems to work just fine.

Also, note the spoiler to everyone in my last post. Just a fyi.

Ah, quite good then. Just wanted to make sure I didn't mess up things; I'll pose the revised version below.

I'm not sure how to incorporate the Chinese into Riichi's name at the moment; maybe one of the words, or both combined, or something - I'll look into that, but I think an inspired name would be better than a randomized yet ethnically accurate name.

As for the spoiler... Of course, I'll be sure to make him work for that. The serious aspects are juts generally where problems come up.

Version 3 will be posted here upon completion.

Spoiler: Version 3

Name: Qianqi (name might be changed again, not sure if it works thematically beyond the main characters' names being structured the same - with two Chinese syllables tossed together).
"Qian Qi" means 'hidden wind' and, using the metaphorical definition of qi, 'hidden energy' (the former alludes to his secret airbending, the latter his claimed dormant status)

Gender: Male

Age: 22

Element: Wind (though, formerly hailing from the Fire Nation, will usually present himself as Dormant)

Skills: Disguise Mastery, Airbending (mostly as agility enhancement and air moves he uses with the sword, so as to make it harder to tell it's not just martial ability), Master Swordsman (type: short sword)

Appearance: Short-cut black hair, "oddly" green eyes, slightly taller than the average Fire Nation male but average in weight. Somewhat pale skin, Qianqi usually is slightly unshaven. Clothes are a dark gray hooded cloak, with long brown pants and shoes, a yellow-tan shirt, and - on his waist - a one/two-handed short sword, blue and green with green scabbard - a gift from his mother. He also wears a straw hat.

Personality: Although he is oddly easygoing/laidback in interaction (an aspect exemplified by his post-defection lifestyle), Qianqi maintains a bold persona. He is, however, quick to anger at certain aspects of the Fire Nation, especially a particular officer... and, more amusingly, if someone does 'yo mama' jokes, or makes a crack about him 'stepping lightly' when he walks or a similar reference to his gait (also, don't mess with the sword). Other than this, he has a rather pensive attitude at times, and is more generous than most would expect of one raised in the Fire Nation.

Background: Well, what can be said? Qianqi was born to Kikue and Tatsuhi, the former an ex-Air Nomad - who claimed to be Dormant - and a Fire Nation merchant, also dormant. Qianqi had been raised mostly by his mother, who had included some teachings of her home - though little in the way of airbending other than how not to be identified as one. During the war efforts' uprising, Qianqi felt honestly sympathetic toward the goal (if not the means to fulfill it); however, with his obviously misplaced eye color and oddly semi-bald mother (as well as an unfitting name, but he was always made fun of for that), it wasn't long before sympathy was replaced by annoyance and isolation. Of course, when the inevitable occurred...

Grief-stricken at his parent's execution, Qianqi fled his home in the night. He began wandering the continent, at first only doing errands in exchange for necessities. But then the Fire Nation caught up with his movements. Qianqi began a slight sabotaging campaign against a division of the army, first only with petty thefts of some items they'd hardly miss; however, with his boldness evident, a few resistors began clinging onto his image as a local hero. With their help, he began trying to raid the supply lines; however, this rarely turned out too well; even if Qianqi's knowledge in disguises allowed an easy 'in', they'd often get caught. Many were lost, and Qianqi began to scale down their efforts to evade capture. He had begun dissembling his guerrilla cell when the strange, balding Yoshiro (an old fisherman whom most everyone got along with) presented him with a lotus-stamped letter addressed to Qianqi, from a man who vanished...

Here "Riichi" is now, with (hopefully) a more appropriate name and clothing.

 

[meggles]

Spoiler: Character - Reviewed

Name: Akemi (snow ? she doesn?t usually use her real name)



Age: 21



Element: Spirit (cannot control can only see)



Skills:

• Spirit sight (other related skills may develop)
  
  Espionage
  
  Mixed martial arts
  
  Throwing needles
  
  Cooking (natural talent to use few ingredients and make nice practical meal)

Appearance:
Akemi is 5'2" and shapely. She has lightly tanned skin, full, rosy lips and dark brown wavy hair which flows down to her waist. She has large eyes framed with long black lashes, but she hides them with a long fringe and a tattered bandage. She rarely shows them to anyone as they are so unusual. Her left eye is brown and speckled with gold while her right is a deep and stormy blue (this is to do with her spirit connection. The brown eye was cursed by a water demon to see the spirit world and was originally blue).

Her clothes are simple and are usually shades of grey blue and tattered brown. Not overly worried about appearances, Akemi often wears the clothes of a man, a long-sleeved, thigh length tunic, a dark belt to hold her weapons and accessories, tight leggings and knee length brown boots.

Her throwing needles are silver, with an intricate design on there tips which she created in resemblance of her mother's water tribe engagement necklace.



Personality:
Akemi is somewhat a loner. She is not shy, but she prefers to keep her opinions to herself unless the situation makes it impossible to do so. Whilst being so introverted Akemi can be quite a witty and wryly character.

Akemi is used to living alone. Her 12 years alone have made her stubborn, strong and resilient, yet there is a soft element to her which she chooses to hide behind a tough facade. Just like her mother once did, Akemi has a caring personality, and though she endeavours to hide it she often gets too emotionally involved with the people she meets. Her heart is easily broken.



Background:
Akemi's family lived in isolation to protect their daughter after the water demon cursed her. They lived on the far of outskirts of the Southern Continent, disassociating themselves with the water tribes nearby. She was just 7 years old when her home was attacked by a small band of rogue fire nation bandits, who had gone AWOL. They came after hearing the stories of the cursed water tribe girl, hoping that she could grant them access to the riches of the spirit world.
Her parents, fearing for their daughter, hid Akemi and urged her to run when she had the chance. In the battle which ensued her father was killed and her mother stolen. Akemi was forced to watch as her parents were torn away from her forever. Once the chance arose Akemi slipped from her hiding place and ran into the snowy landscape.
Since that day she has repressed any memories of her childhood and has harboured a hatred for the fire nation.



Shrouded in mystery, and a long way from home, Akemi travelled to the Earth Kingdom to escape her past. Quickly learning that the world could be a dangerous place she found members of the Earth Kingdom villages she visited to teach her skills in defence and survival.



By the age of 16, Akemi had began to infiltrate and spy on fire nation encampments, claiming to be a blind beggar she was easily able to go un-noticed. Her favourite way to cause trouble was to offer her assisstance in the kitchens of these camps for money and poisoning the troops with her "special stews".
As the years flew by, she became more and more involved in small rebel groups. She began spreading tales of the fire nation?s violent war and encouraging rebellious behaviour. Never staying in one place for long, it was easy enough for her to infiltrate and destroy small encampments and then escape to a far off village. Now at the age of 21, she is ready to go to war and fight those that stole her parents away from her.



Receiving an unexpected letter, sealed with a single waxen lotus Akemi is now sent to the Rockslide Tavern in the small town of Xan Sei - Earth Kingdom

Ok, so I have changed some parts and added a couple of suggestions, I still wanted her to live in the South Pole, but the idea was always that they were far away from the tribe itself (I'm not very good at wording thing, but hopefully its fixed (thank you Dragon_of_red for the help ^_^))
Also I really don't want her to be a bender as such, I just want her to have more insight and a small connection. She was cursed, so she would never have been trained or tutored in anything relevant to the spirit world... Thank you for your last review, they are very helpful ^_^

 

[VuvuZelaMan]

Something just occurred to me; how is the RPG going to deal with similar skills (like acting vs disguise vs lying specifically)? Would you have a standard list, or would you go with a "broad vs deep" thing, where more specific skills would be better at less, and more general skills would do more, but do it less well.

I figure the RP will allow for a certain ability to work with the story, but such a thing doesn't always carry over...

 

[iThinkCat]

This sucks, I can't even quote people.

@VuvuZelaMan: I'll have to review your character update when I get home. About your question, I'm basing each persons individual skills by the context of their backgroud examples. So someone that said they have disguise but in their background they only use it to mask their identity, not impersonate, would only be good at making themselves not like like themselves. They would not be proficient at noticing the small details that an impersonator would. Then again, the person that puts down impersonation might not have the creative imagination to disguise themself as someone they've not met, or doesn't exist. Context clues in the CS basically serve as the rule of thumb for what a character is capable of. That's why I've been trying to make sure people word their skills in very particular ways, so that it will be harder to confuse the intented meaning.

That being said, more specific skill will not be "better" than a more vauge skill. I, the GM (and soon will be looking for co-GM), will be sure to incorporate each character's skills in to the story. Each person will have a moment when their unique skill will be necessary. In that sense, no skill will be "better" than the next, they may just be used more often.

I'm also considering giving everyone a couple extra points to add to skills seeing as everyone is building their characters towards combat. There will be characters that the party will not be able to defeat in combat, and it may be the non-combat skill that help the players get away from the situation alive. This is the reason I asked players to have at least one skill be non-combat related. If I do award extra points, they will be solely for non-combat related skills though. Almost every battle can be avoided if the player react appropriately, and right now the players are sort of forcing themselves to engage in combat scenarios (possibly resulting in early deaths).

Anyways, there's my rant for now. I'll probably have more later. Good question though.

 

[VuvuZelaMan]

iThinkCat's reply

Ah, OK then. As far as the RP aspect goes... I kind of feel bad for not having thought of that as a method of working past linguistic choices. It makes a lot of sense, really.

As far as the "better" skill sets bit... it would only really apply in a mechanistic game (one where rolling was used), so that only was directed to the PnP implementation.

And as for the extra points... I could see it working well.

Anyways, thanks for the answers, and Version 3 of my character is up.

 

[iThinkCat]

iThinkCat's reply

Ah, OK then. As far as the RP aspect goes... I kind of feel bad for not having thought of that as a method of working past linguistic choices. It makes a lot of sense, really.

As far as the "better" skill sets bit... it would only really apply in a mechanistic game (one where rolling was used), so that only was directed to the PnP implementation.

And as for the extra points... I could see it working well.

Anyways, thanks for the answers, and Version 3 of my character is up.

Your 3rd version is good. Oh, and about the PnP system skill would definitely work differently. Skill would be chosen from a list and assign numerical values to determine one's skill. In a game of math, leaving something to interpretation is dangerous.

 

[iThinkCat]

Spoiler: Character - Reviewed

Name: Akemi (snow ? she doesn?t usually use her real name)



Age: 21



Element: Spirit (cannot control can only see)



Skills:

• Spirit sight (other related skills may develop)
  
  Espionage
  
  Mixed martial arts
  
  Throwing needles
  
  Cooking (natural talent to use few ingredients and make nice practical meal)

Appearance:
Akemi is 5'2" and shapely. She has lightly tanned skin, full, rosy lips and dark brown wavy hair which flows down to her waist. She has large eyes framed with long black lashes, but she hides them with a long fringe and a tattered bandage. She rarely shows them to anyone as they are so unusual. Her left eye is brown and speckled with gold while her right is a deep and stormy blue (this is to do with her spirit connection. The brown eye was cursed by a water demon to see the spirit world and was originally blue).

Her clothes are simple and are usually shades of grey blue and tattered brown. Not overly worried about appearances, Akemi often wears the clothes of a man, a long-sleeved, thigh length tunic, a dark belt to hold her weapons and accessories, tight leggings and knee length brown boots.

Her throwing needles are silver, with an intricate design on there tips which she created in resemblance of her mother's water tribe engagement necklace.



Personality:
Akemi is somewhat a loner. She is not shy, but she prefers to keep her opinions to herself unless the situation makes it impossible to do so. Whilst being so introverted Akemi can be quite a witty and wryly character.

Akemi is used to living alone. Her 12 years alone have made her stubborn, strong and resilient, yet there is a soft element to her which she chooses to hide behind a tough facade. Just like her mother once did, Akemi has a caring personality, and though she endeavours to hide it she often gets too emotionally involved with the people she meets. Her heart is easily broken.



Background:
Akemi's family lived in isolation to protect their daughter after the water demon cursed her. They lived on the far of outskirts of the Southern Continent, disassociating themselves with the water tribes nearby. She was just 7 years old when her home was attacked by a small band of rogue fire nation bandits, who had gone AWOL. They came after hearing the stories of the cursed water tribe girl, hoping that she could grant them access to the riches of the spirit world.
Her parents, fearing for their daughter, hid Akemi and urged her to run when she had the chance. In the battle which ensued her father was killed and her mother stolen. Akemi was forced to watch as her parents were torn away from her forever. Once the chance arose Akemi slipped from her hiding place and ran into the snowy landscape.
Since that day she has repressed any memories of her childhood and has harboured a hatred for the fire nation.



Shrouded in mystery, and a long way from home, Akemi travelled to the Earth Kingdom to escape her past. Quickly learning that the world could be a dangerous place she found members of the Earth Kingdom villages she visited to teach her skills in defence and survival.



By the age of 16, Akemi had began to infiltrate and spy on fire nation encampments, claiming to be a blind beggar she was easily able to go un-noticed. Her favourite way to cause trouble was to offer her assisstance in the kitchens of these camps for money and poisoning the troops with her "special stews".
As the years flew by, she became more and more involved in small rebel groups. She began spreading tales of the fire nation?s violent war and encouraging rebellious behaviour. Never staying in one place for long, it was easy enough for her to infiltrate and destroy small encampments and then escape to a far off village. Now at the age of 21, she is ready to go to war and fight those that stole her parents away from her.



Receiving an unexpected letter, sealed with a single waxen lotus Akemi is now sent to the Rockslide Tavern in the small town of Xan Sei - Earth Kingdom

Ok, so I have changed some parts and added a couple of suggestions, I still wanted her to live in the South Pole, but the idea was always that they were far away from the tribe itself (I'm not very good at wording thing, but hopefully its fixed (thank you Dragon_of_red for the help ^_^))
Also I really don't want her to be a bender as such, I just want her to have more insight and a small connection. She was cursed, so she would never have been trained or tutored in anything relevant to the spirit world... Thank you for your last review, they are very helpful ^_^

You character is good for the most part. I would like you to change "Espionage" to something a little more specific. Espionage can encompass many skills such as stealth, intimidation, coercion, self defense, intelligence gathering, etc.

Also, I'm assuming your cooking isn't partial to any of the ethnic styles, and is only a flavor of cooking you invented. If not, please specify since you're not a master of cooking.

Everything else is good, but I have to warn you that an spirit "powers" you want to develop later on must be approved by me first. I don't want you pulling a fast one on me. I am god you know...err...I mean the GM.

 

[iThinkCat]

Spoiler: Ki-Myu Inokaze

Name: Ki-Myu Inokaze

Gender: Male

Age: 20

Element: Fire

Skills: Firebending, Archery, Straight sword, Master of Strategy/Tactics

Appearance: Blond-red hair which is held in a traditional Fire-nation style tail, golden eyes, and slightly pale skin. He stands at 5'10, weighing 150 pounds of lean muscle.

Personality: Ki-Myu is a brilliant and kindhearted warrior, though young, he possesses great skill in both combat and martial planning. Being a Firebender, however, he is often prone to aggressive outbursts, and rash decisions, sometimes being favorable, however.
He has an affinity towards members of both genders, not caring whether someone is male or female, and looking at the natural beauty of the person, both physical and of personality. He is affectionate and protective, a loyal ally to any who befriend him.

Background: Ki-Myu is the child of a tryst between a former Air-Nomad, and a Fire Nation Colonel. A year before the attack on the Air Temples, his mother eloped with his father, choosing love over her spiritual ascension, and leaving the Nomads to live with her beloved.

To stay hidden after word of the attacks, his mother kept her bending hidden from others in their home in the Fire-Nation colonies. Ki-Myu was the first-born child of this union, having his brother, Mazin, an Airbender, a year his junior, who also had to keep his bending a secret. And his sister, three years his junior, Nyaa-Mi as another child. Nyaa-Mi had no bending abilities, much to the relief of their mother, who feared that she would be an Airbender as well.

When some of the villagers discovered Mazin's Airbending abilities, a mob was assembled to take him and bring him to the local militia outpost to be brought to the proper authorities. To keep his brother safe and out of harm, Ki-Myu and their father snuck Mazin away to the home of their grandmother, a powerful Firebender 'Witch' who lived in the mountains. Here, Mazin would be safe, and would learn much from her regarding bending and its origin and mechanics.

This incident stirred something in Ki-Myu, however. He could not stand by while the Fire Nation did this. With much regret, he left his son in the care of his mother and father, his wife having died in childbirth, and left to join a resistance movement. He only has one current experience in battle with the resistance, but it was enough to deal a severe blow to a Fire-Army outpost, thanks to some clever planning and tactics that Ki-Myu made in an on-the-spot judgement.

Get a good view of my mad skillz review...(that was horrible, I know)

So there is one skill I want you to change. Since you have like five bagillion combat skills, and tactics are things you would practically never use outside of combat, I'm going to have to ask you to change one of your skills to something less combat oriented. It can be any of them, you just need something that makes you something other than a fighter. Like I keep telling everyone else, fighting will not be the only thing in this. In fact I plan on it only making up less than half of the situations everyone must overcome. You're actually hurting your character by not spreading yourself out some.

Everything else looks clean. Keep up the good work.

 

[VuvuZelaMan]

iThinkCat's reply

Ah, OK then. As far as the RP aspect goes... I kind of feel bad for not having thought of that as a method of working past linguistic choices. It makes a lot of sense, really.

As far as the "better" skill sets bit... it would only really apply in a mechanistic game (one where rolling was used), so that only was directed to the PnP implementation.

And as for the extra points... I could see it working well.

Anyways, thanks for the answers, and Version 3 of my character is up.

Your 3rd version is good. Oh, and about the PnP system skill would definitely work differently. Skill would be chosen from a list and assign numerical values to determine one's skill. In a game of math, leaving something to interpretation is dangerous.

Cool... and @ PnP, that's pretty much the only way I've seen it done - though I have heard of systems that have an aspect of skill subsets.

 

[Mookie_Magnus]

Spoiler: Ki-Myu Inokaze: Edit

Name: Ki-Myu Inokaze

Gender: Male

Age: 20

Element: Fire

Skills: Firebending, Archery, Straight sword, Strategy/Tactics, Hunting/Tracking
((I put in Archery as a skill to go along with the hunting skill. He can't hunt without a weapon to hunt with, no?)

Appearance: Blond-red hair which is held in a traditional Fire-nation style tail, golden eyes, and slightly pale skin. He stands at 5'10, weighing 150 pounds of lean muscle.

Personality: Ki-Myu is a brilliant and kindhearted warrior, though young, he possesses great skill in both combat and martial planning. Being a Firebender, however, he is often prone to aggressive outbursts, and rash decisions, sometimes being favorable, however.
He has an affinity towards members of both genders, not caring whether someone is male or female, and looking at the natural beauty of the person, both physical and of personality. He is affectionate and protective, a loyal ally to any who befriend him.

Background: Ki-Myu is the child of a tryst between a former Air-Nomad, and a Fire Nation Colonel. A year before the attack on the Air Temples, his mother eloped with his father, choosing love over her spiritual ascension, and leaving the Nomads to live with her beloved.

To stay hidden after word of the attacks, his mother kept her bending hidden from others in their home in the Fire-Nation colonies. Ki-Myu was the first-born child of this union, having his brother, Mazin, an Airbender, a year his junior, who also had to keep his bending a secret. And his sister, three years his junior, Nyaa-Mi as another child. Nyaa-Mi had no bending abilities, much to the relief of their mother, who feared that she would be an Airbender as well.

When some of the villagers discovered Mazin's Airbending abilities, a mob was assembled to take him and bring him to the local militia outpost to be brought to the proper authorities. To keep his brother safe and out of harm, Ki-Myu and their father snuck Mazin away to the home of their grandmother, a powerful Firebender 'Witch' who lived in the mountains. Here, Mazin would be safe, and would learn much from her regarding bending and its origin and mechanics.

This incident stirred something in Ki-Myu, however. He could not stand by while the Fire Nation did this. With much regret, he left his son in the care of his mother and father, his wife having died in childbirth, and left to join a resistance movement. He only has one current experience in battle with the resistance, but it was enough to deal a severe blow to a Fire-Army outpost, thanks to some clever planning and tactics that Ki-Myu made in an on-the-spot judgement.

 

[DragonofDecay86]

Spoiler: Character Sheet

Name: Kazan (His family name was given up after his desertion)

Gender: Male

Age: 25

Element: Fire

Skills: Master of Firebending, Excellent Fire Nation cook, a master of tracking and hunting game, advanced knowledge in the arts of acrobatics, advanced knowledge in the use of a Jian Sword.

Appearance: Kazan has dark black hair and bright amber eyes. His hair isn't nearly as long as most of the nobles in the fire nation, falling down only to his eyes(much like Zuko's hair in the third book). Kazan wears a black cloak over mostly red clothing, as if trying to disguise who he is.

Personality: Kazan try's not to show his emotions when other people are around. Instead, he acts as emotionless as possible, something he learned in training with his old Firebending master. He is calm and reserved, always thinking something through before following through with it. He try's to help those in need, but when those people stand in his way of completing a task he disposes of them.

Background: Kazan used to be a very rich noble in the fire nation, having been brought up in a wealthy family, Kazan never found life too difficult to live. Kazan joined the Fire Nation Army but never approved of what the Fire Nation was doing, but he didn't see what he could do to stop them, was was just a soldier after all. One night, his commanding officer brought him and three other Firebenders to a small Earth Kingdom town, a rural place that maintained itself by growing crops and selling them to larger cities.

At first, Kazan didn't understand why they had been brought out there, but his officer quickly made it clear. Without warning, he and the other Firebenders began to burn the town, using Firebending to ignite buildings and wagons loaded with the towns crops. Kazan refused to join them, and was turned on by his fellow soldiers. Kazan managed to fend them off and escape, taking as many villagers as he could manage with him. They fled into the Kolau Mountains, taking as much as they could carry on foot. They made camp in the mountains, avoiding any Fire Nation soldiers that traveled there, and trying not to stay in one place too long.

They eventually made it into the Earth Kingdom city of Omashu, were Kazan learned that his commanding Officer was dead and there was now a bounty on his head. Kazan fled the city, making his way to a village resort in the Western Earth Kingdom. He hid from the fire nation there, never getting to close to people and always planning out his next move. Kazan stayed there for a few months, until a Fire Nation squad made there way to the village. They seemed intent on finding someone, so they took up camp along the bridges that led to the resort. Kazan needed to get out of the resort, so he started a riot, intent on ransacking the Fire Nation camps and taking what the Fire Nation had.

Kazan led the riot, wearing a dark cloak so that nobody could tell who he was. Kazan didn't use Firebending during the riot, instead he used a Jian Sword, stolen from one of the Fire Nation commanders tents while the riot was beginning. Once Kazan felt that the villagers had drove the Fire Nation soldiers away successfully, he took his leave before the riot ended so that nobody would notice his leave. He received a letter not too long after that from a messenger hawk. The letter bore a lotus stamp and told Kazan to head to San Xei and meet in the second story of the Rockslide Tavern. Kazan knew that something would go wrong, but his curiosity won in the end, forcing him to begin his journey to the Tavern.

 

[Fallen-Angel Risen-Demon]

I edited the sheet somewhat.

 

[Xero Scythe]

Spoiler: Character Sheet

Name: Masamune

Gender: Male

Age: 27

Element: Spirit

Skills: Master Spirit Bender, Freerunning, Master Forger

Appearance: Standing at 5?11,? with raven black hair, Masamune has the kind of face you?re likely to forget- unless you look into his eyes. They say the eyes are the windows into the soul, and if so, one shudders at what those eyes the color of ice show. Masamune dresses in simple, loose robes that hang off his tan body, and are cut off at the shoulders as to not get in his way. He usually dresses in muted colors- gray, maybe a little black trim. Finally, a large backpack hangs on his shoulders, carrying everything Masamune needs to apply his craft.

Personality: Masamune is often vibrant and outgoing, and can be found surrounded with a group of newly-made friends, but at times can be introspective and reticent, occasionally breaking all contact with the human world to explore the Spirit Realm. Whenever Masamune sets himself to a task, he will pursue it to the end.

Background:
Fire. Such a simple little word, isn?t it? Four letters to describe something so voracious, so ravenous, that it will not stop until it has consumed everything in its path or has been consumed itself. So simple a term to depict so complex an entity.

Fire. It?s all Masamune remembers. As a child, Masamune?s father would always go to town to trade with the local Earth Kingdom Merchants. Whenever he came back, Masamune?s brothers and sisters would swarm him to see what he brought home. It was usually some gifts from the grateful families that Masamune?s father healed with his spiritbending, when no one else could. They did not have much, being farmers, but what they had, they made due with. And they were happy. It all ended with the smell of smoke. Masamune woke up, the acrid smell of smoke filling his entire body, cocooning him, suffocating him. His mother burst through the door, shielding Masamune and removing the smoke from his lungs with her waterbending. The other children were in the field and had died immediately, but Masamune could still be saved. His mother rushed him down into the basement, where she stood guard over him until the flames devoured her. Protected by the dying power of his mother?s spirit, Masamune sat in the basement, slowly starving, his only source of water an ashen pool. The house had collapsed, trapping him inside for a week before his cries were heard by his father?s friend, who came to see what had happened to Masamune?s family. He rescued Masamune and taught the child his trade, so that he might have something to feed himself with when the boy went out into the world. Masamune spent 19 years, honing his Spiritbending and mastering the art of the forge.

Masamune finally left his father?s friend and set out into the world, concerned only with revenge. For two years, Masamune assassinated heads of state and other high ranking Fire Nation officials with nary a scratch, each with a note over their lips with the characters for ?He who cries out without noise,? earning him the nickname ?The Silenced One.? Then, Masamune received the letter with that single White Lotus stamped on it. His heart stopped. He had been found out! He read the letter with shaking fingers, collapsing with relief at the message contents. He closed the letter, sealing inside a chemical used in his forge that would combust should it touch air, placed it at the bottom of his pack, and set off to San Xei.

Whew! Finished! Sorry for taking so long, my computer got hit with a virus and I had to do a system restore. Then I had to wait 3 hours for the damn thing to defrag itself, teaching me to do this a little more often. Enjoy.

Time for me to review your character:

So first thing, very good character. I like it. Though I don't know if you know this, but if you paste from Word the ( ' )s aren't displayed properly and show up as (?)s. Just a fyi. It kind of perturbs me every time I write up a character and have to go through and locate all my ( ' )s and re-type them.

Everything else I can't complain about really, but I have tip for you. Spirit benders are much more rare than the other elements and although it is passed down through one's hereditary, everyone has the recessive genes for it. So chances of one's father also being a spirit bender is like one in a million. You don't have to change it, but just know that it's very rare. I do need to update the OP to mention this, my bad.

Also, know that in order to spirit bend one must have a strong control on their "inner self". You could call these one's emotions or even as broad as to say their personality. Notice Guru Pathik and Ty Lee generally had the same carefree outlook on life. In order to truly be in touch with the spirit realm, you must let go of worldly things. Now Ty Lee was still caught up in teenage dreams, probably why she would never be able to master all the chakras like the Guru has. Much like the monk ways of the Air Nomads, spirit bending is a way of life, more so as it directly reflects the state of your "inner self" when used.

Last thing, I'd like if you added to your background (or in skills if you want) some examples of the style of spirit bending he uses. Spirit is one of those elements that could be over powered if I give someone mastery over everything it can accomplish. Do you focus more on the "self" aspect (martial abilities, pain numbing on yourself, and the like), the "others" aspect (healing, communicating, aura reading, etc.), or the "spiritual" aspect (astral projection, spirit communicating, and even partial clairvoyance (I'll have to help you this if you choose the spiritual path)). Also say something about the chakras, like which ones you've opened and haven't opened. The picture below should sum up the chakras neatly enough. Keep in mind though that the chakras must be opened in order, from bottom to top.

Spoiler: Chakras

That should be about it. Sorry for not including this info in the OP. I feel like this was mostly my mistake. I should have thought more about what a spirit bending character would encompass. Stupid me.

Self seems like the best for what he's been doing. Also, as a master, wouldn't he have opened all seven? If not, I would say he's opened up at least five, verging on six.

 

[Fallen-Angel Risen-Demon]

Just a quick question: In the show the bending abilities evolved (e.g. Azula could lightning bend, Toph could metal bend.). Would this be included in the RP at all (e.g. Our characters could, over time, develop the ability to use the evolved bending).

 

[KronosTalon]

Just a quick question: In the show the bending abilities evolved (e.g. Azula could lightning bend, Toph could metal bend.). Would this be included in the RP at all (e.g. Our characters could, over time, develop the ability to use the evolved bending).

I could see the firebenders maybe being able to learn lightning, but the only reason Toph could is because she learned to look at the earth, and she found the tiny pieces of it inside metal, and is actually bending that. That's just what I know, GM can do whatever.