Awkward Male/Female Questions

[Vegosiux]

All I'll say is that when I asked my ex when she was in a bad mood what's wrong and she said "Nothing"; after a while I started to just pretend that's exactly what she meant. The result was largely the same, with less nerve loss involved on my part.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Dirty laundry on the floor annoys me more /:

I let my clothes get grimy enough that my dirty laundry sticks to the wall.

 

[Mr F.]

Um...

Speaking as a boyfriend, the only time I have ever done something questionable was easily explained. I felt threatened by another dude with regards to my girlfriend (He admitted interest in her, she admitted interest in him before dating me) so I acted like a total bellend whilst drunk. I apologised and explained the situation.

As for my girlfriend? She has never done anything inexplicable because we communicate so all of her actions are understandable. Cause, you know, if you are dating someone you should probably be communicating with them etc etc and nothing they do can really shock or surprise you. As for getting her to try certain things?

I just ask "Do you want to try X". You know. Cause that is what you do. If she says no I will ask her what her missgivings are about a certain thing and then go "Well, have you thought X or perhaps Y?". Sometimes this will lead to her changing her mind, sometimes it wont.

In other words?

NOTHING TO SEE HERE. MOVE ALONG.

 

[Zack Alklazaris]

Couldn't you blame it on the subsection of gays your partner belonged too? Twinks, Bears, Cubs, Otters....

Most of the guys I've gone out with generally don't fall into any of those neat categories. Probably because I don't date many porn stars.

I thought it was more of a general look thing, not a personality anyway. Main reason is I don't think I could try to be anything other than a twink with my tiny ass frame. Top, bottom is more of a sexual preference not a personality either.

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You ever wondered why your BF acts like a total *&%^ in certain situations or why he left you for the bimbo with the lollipop in a skirt? Ever wonder how to get your GF to try certain things, or why she won't try certain thing ?

Ask them here and hopefully someone has the answer.

My guess is he left her because she wouldn't wear the skirt and suck on a lollipop. I'd be an ass too if my woman refused to cater to my desires. Someone should have reminded her that doing it for someone you care about doesn't make you a whore.

Seriously though, you have no right to say she needs to cater to your desires if she doesn't want to do it. If they don't want to, you can't make them, or try guilt trip them, that's a pretty self destructive thing to do.
I absolutely hate feet. If I had a partner who had a fetish for his feet being sucked he can either go fuck himself, do it himself, find someone else, or make do with the other ways I can please him.
If someone asked me to dress up in tight leather, I'd laugh in their face. I want to feel sexy too, not looking down and seeing how horrible I'd look in something like that. There's usually compromises you can work on though.

Some people are a bit funny about sucking cock for example. I know I was at one point, I mean, it's where the guy pees from? and it touches the toilet bowl when they sit down to go to the toilet? As long as my mans clean I don't care now. It can't really be helped if some ladies don't want to put it in their mouths (or you know, wherever on her body you stick it, I'm not here to judge) it's not always because they don't want to please you. Or if it is, and she's a selfish lover, I would try talk to her about it or get rid.

Give and take is very important in a relationship. The happier you make your significant other the happier they should be about doing things for you regardless of how unattractive they feel about it. Though it they are dry heaving the whole time it probably wouldn't be a very good turn on.

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My Wife and I agreed very early on that all questions are open. And when I say all I mean all. My wife knows all about splash back and I know all about... well lets say certain things that women one have to deal with. With a bunch of other secrets so I'll see if I can answer some questions on here.

I do have a generic question though. When I was single I would get average sexualized attention from people of the opposite sex (and a surprising high amount of same sex). But now I am married... women (opposite sex) attention has risen up, but attention from the same sex has dropped significantly.

What the hells going on? Are women playing a game with me... trying to get me to leave my wife or do they feel more comfortable opening up around now that they know I don't "think with my penis". And what about the same sex? Wtf happened... I sort of like the attention.

 

[Geo Da Sponge]

Not many personal experiences, however...

I remember one time on here that there was a forum thread asking about how guys manage to 'miss' the toilet and create wet patches, as asked by a girl who lives with guys.

What followed was several pages of guys explaining what it's like trying to urinate through a penis, while potentially semi-erect (especially in the morning). What it's like to wield a fleshy tube full of piss, what the splash back is like, how it can come out at funny angles...

After a lot of these posts, the OP basically screamed for the posters to stop giving too much information. It was hilarious.

Captcha: dalek asylum

 

[SonicWaffle]

Nope. One of the crappy parts of being gay is that when your partner does something you can't explain, you can't just chalk it up to some generalization of how their entire gender thinks or acts. You just have to...deal with it.

For some reason Google isn't working for me, so I can't find an appropriate gif, but THIS.

Fucking hell, why must people presume that the opposite gender is simultaneously a hive mind, and inscrutable unless explained by some other not member of the hive?

To be fair, I think that to the people who presume that, everyone is part of an inscrutable hive-mind that they don't understand.

OT: No, actually, I know perfectly well why my last girlfriend wouldn't do things for me - she was crazy. Sexually she was an open (heh) book, but asking her to do things like "see a counsellor", "give me some space" or "put the fucking knife away" were apparently too much to ask for

 

[SonicWaffle]

Nope. One of the crappy parts of being gay is that when your partner does something you can't explain, you can't just chalk it up to some generalization of how their entire gender thinks or acts. You just have to...deal with it.

Couldn't you blame it on the subsection of gays your partner belonged too? Twinks, Bears, Cubs, Otters....

I was with you up until otters.

I second this confusion. Is it some sort of a furry thing? I don't particularly want to google it, being at work and all...

 

[SonicWaffle]

I have a question, how do I make a good impression on her parents? Her mum likes me but I have only met her mum at the party me and my girlfriend hooked up at. She is going to ask me to meet her parents sooner or later, I don't want to stuff it up.

Don't be a dick. That's pretty much all there is to it. They'll probably be fine with you as long as you're not high, drunk, racist or liable to smack her in the face with your cock right in front of them.

If they take against you, then there isn't a lot you can do about it other than ride it out.

 

[Vegosiux]

To be fair, I think that to the people who presume that everyone is part of an inscrutable hive-mind that they don't understand.

What do you mean "presume"? *peers at* I'm on to you, Waffle, oh yes I am! I'm on to all of you non-Vegosiuxians!

OT: No, actually, I know perfectly well why my last girlfriend wouldn't do things for me - she was crazy. Sexually she was an open (heh) book, but asking her to do things like "see a counsellor", "give me some space" or "put the fucking knife away" were apparently too much to ask for

Yeah, had a problem with a controlling girlfriend myself. Even a long while after the breakup she simply does not realize her behavior was not up to snuff. I mean it was almost the case of a stereotype, you know which one I mean, "woman meets man, woman falls in love with man, woman makes man change for her, woman realizes he's no longer the man she fell in love with once." A stereotype, indeed, but at least one woman on this planet came rather uncomfortably close to it, that much I can say.

 

[SonicWaffle]

Another thing is lying when I have blatant proof of the crime. If you put one toe out of line, I will always find out. Always.

I am afraid of you :-(

 

[SonicWaffle]

To be fair, I think that to the people who presume that everyone is part of an inscrutable hive-mind that they don't understand.

What do you mean "presume"? *peers at* I'm on to you, Waffle, oh yes I am! I'm on to all of you non-Vegosiuxians!

I'm actually part of the easily-understood hive mind. We mostly like to go down the pub and drink until we A) fall over B) puke or C) fall over and puke.

We're not the most sophisticated people.

OT: No, actually, I know perfectly well why my last girlfriend wouldn't do things for me - she was crazy. Sexually she was an open (heh) book, but asking her to do things like "see a counsellor", "give me some space" or "put the fucking knife away" were apparently too much to ask for

Yeah, had a problem with a controlling girlfriend myself. Even a long while after the breakup she simply does not realize her behavior was not up to snuff. I mean it was almost the case of a stereotype, you know which one I mean, "woman meets man, woman falls in love with man, woman makes man change for her, woman realizes he's no longer the man she fell in love with once." A stereotype, indeed, but at least one woman on this planet came rather uncomfortably close to it, that much I can say.

Ha, no, nothing like that. I mean she was actually insane. I wasn't so much trying to change her personality to suit myself as I was trying to keep her from killing herself or otherwise destroying her life. I don't think I did a very good job - after I left her, she slept with a whole bunch of different guys and ended up having to get an abortion, before flipping her shit again and started sending me sexual videos and pictures.

A woman trying to get me to change I wouldn't mind so much - I just don't want another one who gets drunk and violent, or really drunk and has me locked up on a false charge of rape ;-)

On another, slightly more disturbing note: 3000 posts, bitches! Holy shit, but I need to go outside more often...

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

To be fair, I think that to the people who presume that everyone is part of an inscrutable hive-mind that they don't understand.

What do you mean "presume"? *peers at* I'm on to you, Waffle, oh yes I am! I'm on to all of you non-Vegosiuxians!

I'm actually part of the easily-understood hive mind. We mostly like to go down the pub and drink until we A) fall over B) puke or C) fall over and puke.

We're not the most sophisticated people.

Could be worse, you could puke then fall over.

 

[Hagi]

Nope. One of the crappy parts of being gay is that when your partner does something you can't explain, you can't just chalk it up to some generalization of how their entire gender thinks or acts. You just have to...deal with it.

Couldn't you blame it on the subsection of gays your partner belonged too? Twinks, Bears, Cubs, Otters....

\\

WHAT THE FUCK IS A TWINK ? and I never get into awkard stuff I am akward stuff

You'll just have to find someone else who's also awkward stuff. Then, if you play your cards right, you'll eventually get into awkward stuff. Or awkward stuff gets into you, depending on which way you swing.

 

[SonicWaffle]

Nope. One of the crappy parts of being gay is that when your partner does something you can't explain, you can't just chalk it up to some generalization of how their entire gender thinks or acts. You just have to...deal with it.

Couldn't you blame it on the subsection of gays your partner belonged too? Twinks, Bears, Cubs, Otters....

\\

WHAT THE FUCK IS A TWINK ? and I never get into awkard stuff I am akward stuff

You'll just have to find someone else who's also awkward stuff. Then, if you play your cards right, you'll eventually get into awkward stuff. Or awkward stuff gets into you, depending on which way you swing.

I imagine that if you're a naturally awkward person, swinging would be difficult. Too many new people.

 

[SonicWaffle]

To be fair, I think that to the people who presume that everyone is part of an inscrutable hive-mind that they don't understand.

What do you mean "presume"? *peers at* I'm on to you, Waffle, oh yes I am! I'm on to all of you non-Vegosiuxians!

I'm actually part of the easily-understood hive mind. We mostly like to go down the pub and drink until we A) fall over B) puke or C) fall over and puke.

We're not the most sophisticated people.

Could be worse, you could puke then fall over.

I think I'd prefer that. Less chance of going out like Hendrix.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

To be fair, I think that to the people who presume that everyone is part of an inscrutable hive-mind that they don't understand.

What do you mean "presume"? *peers at* I'm on to you, Waffle, oh yes I am! I'm on to all of you non-Vegosiuxians!

I'm actually part of the easily-understood hive mind. We mostly like to go down the pub and drink until we A) fall over B) puke or C) fall over and puke.

We're not the most sophisticated people.

Could be worse, you could puke then fall over.

I think I'd prefer that. Less chance of going out like Hendrix.

Yeah but then you're left half-swimming, half flailing in a puddle of your own spew.

 

[smithy_2045]

I thought this thread was going to be about awkward questions to ask to members of the opposite sex, not "women/men, crazy buggers aye".

 

[SonicWaffle]

To be fair, I think that to the people who presume that everyone is part of an inscrutable hive-mind that they don't understand.

What do you mean "presume"? *peers at* I'm on to you, Waffle, oh yes I am! I'm on to all of you non-Vegosiuxians!

I'm actually part of the easily-understood hive mind. We mostly like to go down the pub and drink until we A) fall over B) puke or C) fall over and puke.

We're not the most sophisticated people.

Could be worse, you could puke then fall over.

I think I'd prefer that. Less chance of going out like Hendrix.

Yeah but then you're left half-swimming, half flailing in a puddle of your own spew.

...swimming? I don't know about you, but I don't think my stomach holds that much vomit!

 

[SonicWaffle]

I thought this thread was going to be about awkward questions to ask to members of the opposite sex, not "women/men, crazy buggers aye".

Ha, really?

So naive ;-)

 

[smithy_2045]

I thought this thread was going to be about awkward questions to ask to members of the opposite sex, not "women/men, crazy buggers aye".

Ha, really?

So naive ;-)

You'd think in my 8 years of being a forum addict I'd have realised these things by now, but alas I evidently have not...