I don?t know if it?s any better than being a teenager, but? I?m simultaneously excited and scared shitless for when I have to go to university later this year. I barely know how to iron my own fucking clothes, let alone actually sustain myself in a new city and not, y?know, die. And if I find it difficult to find enjoyment out of most things as a teenager, then how the fuck will I be able to stop myself from going mad from boredom when I go out in the real world?
But my mum tells me these are just normal worries, there?s always help available, and I?ll pick up these things as I go along. I am pretty proud of myself that I can cook a decent meal of pasta without burning the house down, because it?s less that I can?t do these things and more that I unintentionally create a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure for myself. And, being 19 now, it sure is nice that my mum basically doesn?t give a shit whenever I return home in the small hours, and she?s pretty much given up on telling me what time I should get off the computer, to the point that some days I?m the one who ends up apologizing to her unprompted for only logging off at, like, quarter to 1am.
Regarding growing up, I?ve passed the point of caring too much about what other people think of me. It?s just that, as a child, if you fuck up, it?s still legally your parents? or your teacher?s or whoever?s fault, because you?re too young and ignorant to know any better. As an adult, regardless of how ignorant you may still be, you?re royally ass-fucked if you fuck up because it will be entirely your responsibility if you fail to pay your bills, or miss a week of work, etc. Essentially, all the shit that you saw your parents somehow manage to do without their brains and hands exploding is what you?ll have to do ? and triple that if you end up having children too. Money isn?t just something you get given anymore; well, I mean, it is, but a chunk of that gets taken away in tax to pay for shit you probably don?t even agree with anyway.
Anyway, if you?ll excuse me, I?m going to go off and read my sci-fi books while I can.
Oh, one last thing. If adulthood sucks, that?s more than likely because life itself sucks, generally. Sometimes, even having too much freedom can be bad. Like, if you?re an adult but you still have the mentality of a child to just want to eat all the unhealthy junk food and chocolate and whatnot you like without anyone to stop you until it?s too late and you?re a fat bastard who can?t lose the pounds without even more hard work. Oh, and you?ve got an assignment to hand in or else you?re fired, but don?t relax after that, ?cos you?ve got to go to the doctor about that string of illnesses you?ve been getting because your body starts breaking down with age. And you want to go out on the weekend and have a drink, but all your friends from secondary school and university have all but drifted away from you and now you only have a few fuckers that you keep company with and THEY are always busy TOO! WTF?!
). Honestly the only drawback is the summer vacation.
