Bit of Advice please

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Hugh Mann

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Jan 24, 2010
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I am bisexual, and I'm a guy, so it's not the cool kind of bisexual either, but I'm fairly sure that my parents will accept it if I tell them.(eventually)

I'm afraid, though, if I come out to my friends, then they'll all get scared that I like them and I'll lose my relationship with them (most of them are like family to me), and that the people who don't know me very well won't even take me seriously, thinking that I'm just doing it to get attention (I'm sure some of the posters on this forum will think the same).

Any advice you escapists could give me on this subject would be very helpful.
 

Marter

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Oct 27, 2009
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Don't mention it if it doesn't come up. It really isn't something that should be coming up in day to day conversation.
 

Gxas

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Sep 4, 2008
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If your friends wont accept you because of this, they aren't friends. As cliche as that sounds, its true.

As for your family, I'm really not sure how to bring it up to them. Do you have proof that they wont be happy with this?
 

Roxas1359

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Aug 8, 2009
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Well, how long have you been friends with them? They should still accept you if they are really true friends. Just wait for the right time and then explain it. You might probably want to explain it to your parents before telling your friends though.
 

Dragon_of_red

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Dec 30, 2008
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Well, if they are weirded out by it then there not really your friends now are they?

I got nothing wrong with the gay community... If your really worried, make sure you explicitly state how ugly they all are and that you ar enot the least bit attracted to them... maybe a bit nicer than that though.

Thts all i can give, since ive never been in this situation.
 

Hugh Mann

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Jan 24, 2010
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Gxas said:
If your friends wont accept you because of this, they aren't friends. As cliche as that sounds, its true.

As for your family, I'm really not sure how to bring it up to them. Do you have proof that they wont be happy with this?
I think they'll be surprised (my family), but their pretty accepting, and I'm moving out soon anyways if they for some reason go completely insane, but with my friends, I've known most of them all my life and though the "they're not really your friends if they don't accept you" is morally right,I don't think it'll be much consolation if all of them get weirded out, and don't talk to me. ( thank all of you guys btw )
 

Hugh Mann

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Jan 24, 2010
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marter said:
Don't mention it if it doesn't come up. It really isn't something that should be coming up in day to day conversation.
Strangely enough I had to lie 3 times this week at lunch just becuase I didn't know what to do, and I guess it really isn't their business but they are my friends and I'd rather not have to live a double life around them.
 

Cheery Lunatic

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Aug 18, 2009
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I'll be honest. Whenever I hear someone say that they're bisexual, I immediately think they're just posers doing it for attention.

And I agree with Marter. Don't make a big deal out of it. If it comes up, then say it casually, but otherwise it might just be awkward all 'round. If they're really like family, I'll bet they'd accept you though.
 

Hugh Mann

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Jan 24, 2010
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Old Trailmix said:
I'm not going to, nothing good will ever come of it in my eyes.....
I hate having to constantly hide it away like I'm ashamed of it though...
 

cheese_wizington

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Hugh Mann said:
Old Trailmix said:
I'm not going to, nothing good will ever come of it in my eyes.....
I hate having to constantly hide it away like I'm ashamed of it though...
Yeah, it does suck a lot. I have a few select people I know I can talk to and they won't mind/ tell anyone, so that's good.
 

Hugh Mann

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Jan 24, 2010
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Cheery Lunatic said:
I'll be honest. Whenever I hear someone say that they're bisexual, I immediately think they're just posers doing it for attention.

And I agree with Marter. Don't make a big deal out of it. If it comes up, then say it casually, but otherwise it might just be awkward all 'round. If they're really like family, I'll bet they'd accept you though.
And that's exactly what I'm afraid most people will think of me if word gets around (thank you for the honesty)

It seems the casual approach may be the best, but I'm afraid of the above (especially if I only seem to say anything about it when I'm asked)
 

Chifishken

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Apr 23, 2010
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my friend came out as gay and his dad didn't speak to him for like 2 weeks, after that his dad bought him a top which had on it "We're all equals" which is beautiful. in addition to this, i kind of agree with the cliché thing

Gxas said:
If your friends wont accept you because of this, they aren't friends. As cliche as that sounds, its true.

As for your family, I'm really not sure how to bring it up to them. Do you have proof that they wont be happy with this?
however if your afraid your going to lose a strong friendship over this then is it worth taking the risk?
 

Hugh Mann

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Jan 24, 2010
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Old Trailmix said:
Hugh Mann said:
Old Trailmix said:
I'm not going to, nothing good will ever come of it in my eyes.....
I hate having to constantly hide it away like I'm ashamed of it though...
Yeah, it does suck a lot. I have a few select people I know I can talk to and they won't mind/ tell anyone, so that's good.
What do you do with social networking sites like facebook?
 

cheese_wizington

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Aug 16, 2009
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Hugh Mann said:
Old Trailmix said:
Hugh Mann said:
Old Trailmix said:
I'm not going to, nothing good will ever come of it in my eyes.....
I hate having to constantly hide it away like I'm ashamed of it though...
Yeah, it does suck a lot. I have a few select people I know I can talk to and they won't mind/ tell anyone, so that's good.
What do you do with social networking sites like facebook?
I don't use them that much. I have a Facebook account (which likes to spam my e-mail account) but I rarely use it.
 

chozo_hybrid

What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets.
Jul 15, 2009
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Be yourself, when it comes up you may have to sink or swim. You don't have to hide who you are, if friends and family would get mad or leave you due to sexual orientation then somethings not right.
 

Jojo1378

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Feb 17, 2010
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Well, I think that you could tell your friends, if they are weirded out its normal, but if they ditch you because of it, then they aren't your friends. It's kinda natural to be slightly weirded out by it, i mean if one of my friends was I would definitely be a little freaked, but I wouldn't abandon them.
 

RathWolf

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Apr 14, 2009
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Don't make a big deal out of it. If someone asks, tell them. Maybe mention it offhand if you really feel the need to have it known. Trying to make it some official announcement will just make it more awkward.