"...but we're just friends"
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My suspicions are aroused. >.>zehydra said:
Anyways, if you're in the friend zone, you gotta start being distant and acting more independent. Don't always be there for her, have your own life and generally do things away from her until she comes to you "missing" you. It's a quick and generalized method, but it can work.
OR...you can be her friend.
I have so many "sisters," it's not even funny. :/
EDIT: I think I get that because I genuinely care, and I listen to their problems. I'm also always there if she needs me. And I do that for my guy friends, too.
EDIT: I think I get that because I genuinely care, and I listen to their problems. I'm also always there if she needs me. And I do that for my guy friends, too.
While I laugh at this guys use of 'brah' I agree, if you want them as friends thats great, girls can be good company. However if you want a relationship with a girl then MAN UP and ask her before she gets attached. Worst she can do is say no, which is not the end of the world. Some might even say it builds characterNew Vegas Samurai said:
Yup had this too many times, too many damn times.
So a few tips on dealing with it:
- once the "just friends" line falls move on, she is unreachable and you should just leave it at that, it may turn back years later when she needs a reliable schmuck to take care of the kids but don't count on it
- stay away from the friend zone by not being nice, ya you heard me DO NOT be nice
- your interest/time/favors need to be earned, then they feel like you are a catch, if you just do everything for them... well you're worth less then a $2 hooker
- throw that "just be yourself" sh*t out the window, if you need advice then clearly "yourself" isn't working, so I say pretend to be the prick they so eagerly desire, and what do you think is better the nice guy pretending to be a jerk or the actual jerk...
So a few tips on dealing with it:
- once the "just friends" line falls move on, she is unreachable and you should just leave it at that, it may turn back years later when she needs a reliable schmuck to take care of the kids but don't count on it
- stay away from the friend zone by not being nice, ya you heard me DO NOT be nice
- your interest/time/favors need to be earned, then they feel like you are a catch, if you just do everything for them... well you're worth less then a $2 hooker
- throw that "just be yourself" sh*t out the window, if you need advice then clearly "yourself" isn't working, so I say pretend to be the prick they so eagerly desire, and what do you think is better the nice guy pretending to be a jerk or the actual jerk...
Yes.
Right now, in fact.
I'm not sure though. Could go either way at this point.
It does seem very strange to me though. You build up a friendship with someone, get closer to them, and spend nearly every day talking. You know you can connect on an emotional level, and yet, you're not willing to try and go a little further.
And then you go on to try and build the same thing with a total stranger, and are always shocked and surprised when it doesn't work out, and you end up crying on the sofa with the person who is always there for you, and yet, is still 'just a friend'.
It's just so strange. People always complaining about how their boy/girlfriend isn't quite right, and yet stay in those relationships long after they know they're not right for each other. And when they do find a person they enjoy spending time with, trust implicitly, and value so much they don't want to live without them... they won't proceed because they're friends.
Just one of those quirks of humanity I guess. People be crazy.
Right now, in fact.
I'm not sure though. Could go either way at this point.
It does seem very strange to me though. You build up a friendship with someone, get closer to them, and spend nearly every day talking. You know you can connect on an emotional level, and yet, you're not willing to try and go a little further.
And then you go on to try and build the same thing with a total stranger, and are always shocked and surprised when it doesn't work out, and you end up crying on the sofa with the person who is always there for you, and yet, is still 'just a friend'.
It's just so strange. People always complaining about how their boy/girlfriend isn't quite right, and yet stay in those relationships long after they know they're not right for each other. And when they do find a person they enjoy spending time with, trust implicitly, and value so much they don't want to live without them... they won't proceed because they're friends.
Just one of those quirks of humanity I guess. People be crazy.
Honestly, this doesn't happen to me. I just take a different approach to things with girls.
I usually become friends with the girl. As we become more acquainted, I might hit on her. But I do it in a sort of light-hearted, none-too-serious joking way. I can sort of test the waters doing that. From there, I just take it real slow, still acting like a friend but maybe making teensy tiny advances.
Now, this has only actually worked three times. The first led to a horrible relationship with a girl who had some issues. The second basically just scored me a fuck-buddy for a few weeks, before she dumped my ass and got a real boyfriend. Which is okay, that relationship was mostly physical, "have fun", that deal. But the third, well I'm glad to have found a nice girl. Still dating her. Going well.
I usually become friends with the girl. As we become more acquainted, I might hit on her. But I do it in a sort of light-hearted, none-too-serious joking way. I can sort of test the waters doing that. From there, I just take it real slow, still acting like a friend but maybe making teensy tiny advances.
Now, this has only actually worked three times. The first led to a horrible relationship with a girl who had some issues. The second basically just scored me a fuck-buddy for a few weeks, before she dumped my ass and got a real boyfriend. Which is okay, that relationship was mostly physical, "have fun", that deal. But the third, well I'm glad to have found a nice girl. Still dating her. Going well.
Wait, that seems a bit off. Only 5 minutes? What if a guy meets a girl but doesn't think of asking her out in the first 5 minutes?008Zulu said:
I actually said something kinda like that to a guy once because I was already dating someone else and, frankly, we weren't compatible at all, but he didn't see that. We had little to nothing in common.
I can't say much else besides that, tho. It's hard for me to see it from his perspective.
I can't say much else besides that, tho. It's hard for me to see it from his perspective.
Well, girls are only interested in me for sex/relationships. This might sound golden but I wish I could have some cool girl-just-friends, as I do have a girlfriend already. I have really just one girl-just-friend, and even with her all of my friends suspect us of being on the shady side.
To quote a girl who wanted to become friends with me less than a year ago (this was when I said I wanted her to meet my gf):
"I don't give a fuck about your girlfriend" and became pissed. We didn't become friends.
To quote a girl who wanted to become friends with me less than a year ago (this was when I said I wanted her to meet my gf):
"I don't give a fuck about your girlfriend" and became pissed. We didn't become friends.
If you started as a friend, acted as a friend and did all you could be a friend, then chances are that yes, the girl's gonna consider you as a friend rather then a potential lover until possibly much, much MUCH (i'm talking several years down the line when you honestly don't even think about hooking up with her) later it might happen spontaneously.
Until then, can't blame the girl for treating you exactly the way you've acted,
Hoping for lovesies under such situations, besides showing that this friend thing was but an elaborate charade, is impractical and nonsensical.
Those "dicks" have done naught but gone out and seeked a relationship and been forward in their intentions. That is less dickish then pretending to be friends with a girl for the dim prospect of having a chance later on, working on it for months, then make a move when the girl has lost all interest.
Golden Advice you won't follow: "If it happens, it happens, if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen".
Until then, can't blame the girl for treating you exactly the way you've acted,
Hoping for lovesies under such situations, besides showing that this friend thing was but an elaborate charade, is impractical and nonsensical.
Those "dicks" have done naught but gone out and seeked a relationship and been forward in their intentions. That is less dickish then pretending to be friends with a girl for the dim prospect of having a chance later on, working on it for months, then make a move when the girl has lost all interest.
Golden Advice you won't follow: "If it happens, it happens, if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen".