California Gay Marriage Ban Lifted

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AcacianLeaves

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aquailiz said:
Homosexuality, in my opinion, is not normal. It is natural, if by natural you mean that nature "allows it" and that it occurs in nature...From what I have studied, it is a deeply intricate problem of the human psyche...Gay people now hear that they must embrace their condition and accept it...Basically, to me, someone who considers himself a homosexual is no different as a person as someone who has ADD.
It occurs in other species and throughout nature...but its a problem of the human psyche? There are over 1500 animal species that practice homosexuality. The entire Bonobo population is bisexual, does their entire species have a mental disorder? 1/4 of all Black Swan pairings are homosexual, are they also infected with this disease caused by the human psyche?

For someone who claims to have done a lot of research, it sure seems like most of your 'research' involved religious texts or outdated manuals from the 'lobotomize independent women' days of psychiatry. I don't mean to insult you, but you really need to update your research before you claim to have an informed opinion.
 

Guest_Star

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Danman1 said:
Guest_Star said:
Furious Styles said:
Thoughts?.
Good for them I guess? I fail to see the fuzz.

What I carnt understand is how this is such an issue that it warrants almost 600 posts on a gaming forum.
Yeah, the US seem like an ass backwards strange country in some regards. "In God we Trust" and so on.
But, the diff between marriage and not in this case, it's just wording, aint it?
Cohabitation, partnership etc... that's basically the same thing, innit?

Or have I misunderstanded?
From what I understand (and being on a gaming forum, I'm an expert) in theory it's supposed to be the same. But same sex couples receive very little of the benefits married couples do.
Well, if they don't get the same benefits I can see the issue. But otherwise it's just semantics.

Here in Norway, there used to civil unions for same sex couples, but the law was changed recently, so now they can have "proper" marriages. But it's just a change in the wording, since the civil union law and the marriage law was practically the same. So they just added the paragraph "Two persons of opposite or same sex can marry." and removed the civil union law.
In fact, a same sex couple had more benefits than a hetero cohabitation couple even before the law change.
If they want curch weddings tho, that's still up to the individual priest.
 

aquailiz

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HG131 said:
aquailiz said:
HyenaThePirate said:
Dexiro said:
HyenaThePirate said:
Dexiro said:
I'm not arguing against your opinion, i just think you're being a little harsh xD

Be honest, have you ever met a gay person? The majority are no different than anyone else.
You know your best friend, anyone you work with, the average passerby in the street, they could be gay without giving the slightest hint. It just seems a bit harsh that you'd suddenly distance yourself once you found out about a tiny harmless fact.

Imagine if your best friend suddenly cut off all communications with you just because you liked apples, it wouldn't be nice D:
I wouldn't like it, but wouldn't I have to accept it? I certainly wouldn't want to be forced to suddenly eating apples just to appease him. So its his perogative. He can cut communications and I'll go on disliking apples, which is one solution that resolves the situation. It is probably the most peaceful of solutions as well, because the alternative would be to either force me to like apples, or force him to be my friend, and forcing anybody to do anything they don't like isn't right no matter what side you find yourself on.
I'm not sure you read my post properly, one of us is getting confused here xD

The point is you wouldn't be forced to do anything by associating with gay people.

Lets say you distanced yourself from anyone that liked apples. Now a great friend of yours reveals that he likes apples. His liking apples isn't actually affecting you at all though so is it really a good enough reason to distance yourself from him? He's essentially the same person he was before you found out about his apple love afterall!

If you're distancing yourself from flamboyant "unicorns and rainbows" type of gay person then i totally understand you finding it uncomfortable, I'm gay and even i avoid the annoying flamboyant type.
For most gay people though their sexuality is no different for someone's love of apples. I'd just hate to see you or anyone else lose a friend over something so small.
Oh I got your point. And it made very good sense. But, as I said, it comes down to a person's personal convictions. If I made it a private policy to distance myself from anyone who liked apples, and a friend of mine reveals that he likes apples, what impetus would I have to suddenly reverse that policy I have lived by for so long? At that point, the question would be if the particular FRIEND is worth enough to overlook his apple love affair. Some people don't have the capacity to do that. I certainly don't in some aspects.

For example, I believe in God. If I had a friend that did not believe in God, in fact revealed that he was a very staunch atheist, then would not my decision to remain friends with him be based upon my consideration of his worth to me as well as his consideration of my worth to him? His actions would carry a considerable amount of weight, for example, if he began to constantly thumb his nose at religion or make statements that would be considered insulting or had a very "anti-religion" behavior, even if he treated me like his only dear kid brother I'd have deep reservations about associating with such a person. But if I ever said "I'll have to pray about about that" and he was supportive in my beliefs or in the least refrained from making a statement about the futility of prayer or what have you, then perhaps the friendship could be salvaged in some capacity.

I think thats where this gay issue lies currently. If gays kept their personal business and thoughts to themselves and anti-gays did the same, there would be no issue. If they got married or civil unioned or whatever and it was just something between their partners and themselves then fine. But if they expect everyone to be joyed about it and celebrate their marriage as if they were a heterosexual couple, they may run into a problem... that is asking a lot of people, especially over a subject that is uncomfortable at best to some and absolutely reviled at worst by others.

But there is another side of this... the "friend's" side. What right does my "Friend" who loves apples have to demand that I know, accept, and understand his apple love affair? If they know my feelings on apples, why would he need to even bring up his love of apples to me? Why not keep it personal? I don't need to know the details of him eating apples, nor is there a need to share them so that creates a problem on the other end of the spectrum.

I think that might be another possible key to why this whole gay marriage thing is an issue to begin with... because while some may view it as a private, personal thing that they have the right to do, there is that flamboyant element that even YOU admit you dislike that feel the need to draw attention to themselves as if who they are sleeping with, how, and why is important to anyone other than themselves. If you like same sex sex, then go right ahead, go down a storm, and do whatever tickles your fancy. But don't expect in fact don't INSIST that others like it too or must be tolerant when you flaunt it to them.

People need to learn how to behave in a society again... I think we've all embraced this idea of "anarchy" where you and YOUR beliefs and feelings are supposed to matter to people and should be shouted out publically at every opportunity. This just isn't so.

Besides, maybe if gay people found me cuter than the girls that reject me, I might be more receptive to them. Just a little humor :) to lighten a heavy block of rhetoric.
This is exactly the view I have on the subject. Personal opinions aside, I believe gay people go out of their way to draw attention on themselves sometimes.

Personal opinions now... I'm also sickened by the many other people who title themselves as superior because their views agree with the current progressive thinking. Not only so, many other people even undermine and denigrate the idea of rejecting gay marriage. Surely, rulings such as these determine progress towards certain viewpoints, however, these viewpoints are not necessarily the most beneficial. Progress towards a direction does not always mean progress towards the correct direction. I believe many people here that post would receive a great deal of moderation if they even dared to call a "bigot" someone who openly supported gay marriage. Nevertheless, gay marriage supporters put down negative comments like these against the "public" that does not support their ideas. I don't believe in conservative and liberal ideologies, certainly, all differing ideas are just that, different.

I am a person who has studied and even given hour-long talks and informational sessions about the concept of homosexuality. I'll have to admit it is quite easy for the public to speculate and generate opinion about the matter by listening to what the media says and what "leading" opinion-makers discourse, gay people included. I would even say the general public does not a concrete, solid idea on what the matter really deals with. I have read probably too many scientific articles and research papers on the matter. I have spoken and conversed with gay people, I have dealt with them and even recently had a gay roommate. I read and studied the works of psychologists, sociologists, and doctors who specialized in defining what homosexuality really is, and I'll have to admit it is easy to spot others who do not have a broad depth of knowledge on the subject.

What I intended with the previous paragraph was to show that I am not just blabbering off with my opinion. I try to keep my thoughts as unbiased as possible on this matter, mostly because some people can be sensitive towards it, and because in order to fully understand a debatable subject, you have to know both sides of the story.

Homosexuality, in my opinion, is not normal. It is natural, if by natural you mean that nature "allows it" and that it occurs in nature. In addition, it is not close to being the majority. From what I have studied, it is a deeply intricate problem of the human psyche; which has been recently worsened by society. Do note that even though a problem does not interfere with a person's ability to perform well in society, this does not mean the problem itself is not there. Of course the APA declared it was not a mental disorder, but the circumstances and history surrounding that council are sketchy at best. In recent times, numerous sociological processes began to exacerbate the condition. It became a statement to be gay. Gay people were persecuted, incriminated, and martyred. However, during the modern era of telecommunications and globalization, these processes were not controlled in the least, but rather exaggerated. It is through society that being gay has become a problem, and because of the kind of society that we live in, it has become a problem to even try to revert it. Now gay people who try to become straight are persecuted! Gay people now hear that they must embrace their condition and accept it; they must flaunt it, even if it is discreetly. If they have homosexual urges, they must be true to themselves and choose to follow them. Of course there is a lot more to this, but that is the main idea.

Basically, to me, someone who considers himself a homosexual is no different as a person as someone who has ADD.

I also find it pointless to declare that gay people are more successful, productive, competitive, safe, open, intelligent, and more beneficial to society. Why? Because nothing less is expected. Just because they are gay they should not receive any spotlight or special attention. They should be as good members of society as everyone else is. They are not crippled in any way, they are not physically ill in any way, they are not handicapped in any way (from being homosexuals), and thus, they should perform as well or better than any other member of society. Many people approach the issue and set up "Gay vs. Straight" comparisons, but I'm sure if they had looked far enough, they would have found even more straight people that perform just as well or better than gay people.

In conclusion, I would have to remind (and thank) any kind reader who actually finished reading my post, that this is my opinion. I think it is an educated opinion due to the amount of background that I have personally studied and dealt with. I would also like to say that this is an issue that deals with more areas than the ones presently discussed. I would also encourage people to educate themselves and study this subject further and deeper before formulating opinions of their own, and to search the truth within this topic rather than listen to the media and society and generate opinions from it.
You had me fuming at the start of your insane opinion, but then you had to bring up ADD. At that point, you literally had me growling. ADD is not a mental disorder. It's made up to get doctors and medical companies money. Homosexuality is not a mental disorder, and thinking it is should be classified as one. Besides, I don't even believe you about the rest. There's no way that you did, unless every time you did you payed attention to NONE of the facts you were learning. No, you know what? Fuck it.
Did my post really anger you as such? Why don't you expand on your knowledge on the subject and enlighten me. Prove to me ADD is no mental disorder. Prove to me homosexuality is not a mental condition. Are you implying that due to my opinions and thoughts about homosexuality I should be considered crazy? I think having a restrictive, senseless, rampaging mind should be considered a mental disorder.
 

aquailiz

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HG131 said:
aquailiz said:
Xojins said:
aquailiz said:
Personal opinions now... I'm also sickened by the many other people who title themselves as superior because their views agree with the current progressive thinking. Not only so, many other people even undermine and denigrate the idea of rejecting gay marriage. Surely, rulings such as these determine progress towards certain viewpoints, however, these viewpoints are not necessarily the most beneficial. Progress towards a direction does not always mean progress towards the correct direction. I believe many people here that post would receive a great deal of moderation if they even dared to call a "bigot" someone who openly supported gay marriage. Nevertheless, gay marriage supporters put down negative comments like these against the "public" that does not support their ideas. I don't believe in conservative and liberal ideologies, certainly, all differing ideas are just that, different.

I am a person who has studied and even given hour-long talks and informational sessions about the concept of homosexuality. I'll have to admit it is quite easy for the public to speculate and generate opinion about the matter by listening to what the media says and what "leading" opinion-makers discourse, gay people included. I would even say the general public does not a concrete, solid idea on what the matter really deals with. I have read probably too many scientific articles and research papers on the matter. I have spoken and conversed with gay people, I have dealt with them and even recently had a gay roommate. I read and studied the works of psychologists, sociologists, and doctors who specialized in defining what homosexuality really is, and I'll have to admit it is easy to spot others who do not have a broad depth of knowledge on the subject.

What I intended with the previous paragraph was to show that I am not just blabbering off with my opinion. I try to keep my thoughts as unbiased as possible on this matter, mostly because some people can be sensitive towards it, and because in order to fully understand a debatable subject, you have to know both sides of the story.

Homosexuality, in my opinion, is not normal. It is natural, if by natural you mean that nature "allows it" and that it occurs in nature. In addition, it is not close to being the majority. From what I have studied, it is a deeply intricate problem of the human psyche; which has been recently worsened by society. Do note that even though a problem does not interfere with a person's ability to perform well in society, this does not mean the problem itself is not there. Of course the APA declared it was not a mental disorder, but the circumstances and history surrounding that council are sketchy at best. In recent times, numerous sociological processes began to exacerbate the condition. It became a statement to be gay. Gay people were persecuted, incriminated, and martyred. However, during the modern era of telecommunications and globalization, these processes were not controlled in the least, but rather exaggerated. It is through society that being gay has become a problem, and because of the kind of society that we live in, it has become a problem to even try to revert it. Now gay people who try to become straight are persecuted! Gay people now hear that they must embrace their condition and accept it; they must flaunt it, even if it is discreetly. If they have homosexual urges, they must be true to themselves and choose to follow them. Of course there is a lot more to this, but that is the main idea.

Basically, to me, someone who considers himself a homosexual is no different as a person as someone who has ADD.

I also find it pointless to declare that gay people are more successful, productive, competitive, safe, open, intelligent, and more beneficial to society. Why? Because nothing less is expected. Just because they are gay they should not receive any spotlight or special attention. They should be as good members of society as everyone else is. They are not crippled in any way, they are not physically ill in any way, they are not handicapped in any way (from being homosexuals), and thus, they should perform as well or better than any other member of society. Many people approach the issue and set up "Gay vs. Straight" comparisons, but I'm sure if they had looked far enough, they would have found even more straight people that perform just as well or better than gay people.

In conclusion, I would have to remind (and thank) any kind reader who actually finished reading my post, that this is my opinion. I think it is an educated opinion due to the amount of background that I have personally studied and dealt with. I would also like to say that this is an issue that deals with more areas than the ones presently discussed. I would also encourage people to educate themselves and study this subject further and deeper before formulating opinions of their own, and to search the truth within this topic rather than listen to the media and society and generate opinions from it.
The problem with this is that no matter how much you study, observe, research homosexuals and homosexuality, you will never be able to define what homosexuality is because your thoughts and findings are inherently biased if you are heterosexual. So I'm sorry but your opinions are in no way objective or factual.
Good point. However the same can be applied to homosexuals, they cannot give an unbiased opinion either. It would be even harder to deem bi-sexuals as an unbiased voice. Since they are both homosexuals and heterosexuals, they cannot express what it means to be either one or the other uniquely. Then, according to your argument, no one could give an objective or factual opinion.
Correct, but I still don't trust you.
AcacianLeaves said:
aquailiz said:
Homosexuality, in my opinion, is not normal. It is natural, if by natural you mean that nature "allows it" and that it occurs in nature...From what I have studied, it is a deeply intricate problem of the human psyche...Gay people now hear that they must embrace their condition and accept it...Basically, to me, someone who considers himself a homosexual is no different as a person as someone who has ADD.
It occurs in other species and throughout nature...but its a problem of the human psyche? There are over 1500 animal species that practice homosexuality. The entire Bonobo population is bisexual, does their entire species have a mental disorder? 1/4 of all Black Swan pairings are homosexual, are they also infected with this disease caused by the human psyche?

For someone who claims to have done a lot of research, it sure seems like most of your 'research' involved religious texts or outdated manuals from the 'lobotomize independent women' days of psychiatry. I don't mean to insult you, but you really need to update your research before you claim to have an informed opinion.
Like I said, I don't think he did any research. He's just a troll with alot of time on his hands.
So says the one who replied to all posts he considered offensive on a 600-post thread.
 

Treblaine

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Buzz Killington said:
Treblaine said:
But why - straight or gay - would you want the state (or church) to come in and recognise it?
A huge number of health and end-of-life issues, for one thing--inheritance, hospital visitation, living wills, and so on.
Hmm, Guess I was only looking at the ideal circumstances of a relationship when steady and nothing is going wrong.

Also, divorces are sticky enough as they are, but what if two people who lived together for 20 years unmarried separate? It would be a nightmare separating property and responsibility, years of separate lawsuits of he said he said. At least with marriage there is the "yours is mine, mine is yours" base point to start off from.

It's just I know the origins of marriage as NOT as an equal partnership but more traditionally indentured servitude (usually for the woman) with less rights than a would have child today. It makes me pretty cynical at times.

Though I suppose marriage does show two people are REALLY committed about being together so their relationship should be shown with proper respect as I know boyfriend+girlfriend relationships can not be that serious at all.
 

MrJohnson

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Wooheee! Welcome to tha' futurement of civil rights California! Now you can join us pig rustlin', corn eatin', deep frying, farmers out here in the boonies of Iowa!

Fuck you California, and fuck your media. Way to portray us as stupid, ignorant, and intolerant when your state repealed gay marriage and we voted that it should be legal. Not to mention the fact that our literacy rates, and our high school and college graduation rates being much, much higher than yours.

Because even the country bumpkins out here in Iowa (Iowa, not Idaho and I swear to god the fact that people somehow don't know where Iowa is blows my mind, it's the exact middle of the biggest natural floodplain in the world, and produces ,along with the rest of the Midwest, the majority of the food keeping us nice and fat) have at least a high school education.
 

AndyFromMonday

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HG131 said:
AndyFromMonday said:
One of Many said:
AndyFromMonday said:
A victory for human rights! Hurrah!
But what of the human rights of the majority that voted to live in a state without gay marriage?
But what of the human rights of the people whose rights are taken away? Does the majority have the right to take rights away from the minority? I think not. If it doesn't affect you then you have no right to have a saying on the matter.
They don't deserve rights, as they tried to take the rights of others who never did anything to deserve that.
You're right. Fuck those stupid homosexuals. They're taking our rights away by attempting to be equal to us. Those fucking bastards!
 

Verlander

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This is a step backwards, not because of equality, but because it promotes marriage, which in many ways restricts personal and financial freedom. Good luck to people who want to do that, but this fight over it for homosexuals is just going to increase its supposed importance to everyone else
 

bobknowsall

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Verlander said:
This is a step backwards, not because of equality, but because it promotes marriage, which in many ways restricts personal and financial freedom. Good luck to people who want to do that, but this fight over it for homosexuals is just going to increase its supposed importance to everyone else
Please, explain.

OT: Well, Proposition 8 was just something I never felt any support for, so good thing it's been repealed.
 

Verlander

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Well, asides from the obvious lack of sexual freedoms (legally, not just morally), with marriage you loose full responsibility of your belongings after death-a spouse can appeal will desisions. You also run the risk of split estate following a divorce, and even a strong pre nup can be contended. Marriage laws generally favour the female (in a straight marriage), which is sexist, and are just generally damaging.

The pre concieved notion that marriage is a positive thing, and a must leads many people to marry prematurely, which goes someway to explaining the high divorce rates in the west. A bad split can financially cripple someone as well as emotionally, and all for a gesture. I'm good friends with many people who never married, but made symbolic and personal gestures of cimmitment to each other, and they are far happier. That marriage ring on the finger can feel like a massive restriction (which it is) and I daresay that psychologically the fact that you can't get away from your husband/wife can be incentive to try, hence unfaithfullness (note that I am not saying it IS the cause, just that it may encourage it).

The reason marriage exists is a religious thing, aimed at creating a better responisbility towards ones families. But it was an evolution in a society where mistresses and multiple women were the norm for men. In that respect, it was a positive thing. It's an important law, to stop people walking off and leaving families. Now, however, having children out of wedlock isn't as frowned upon, and non married parents have proven themselves to be just as able to raise and create a happy and positive lifestyle for their children (and in many respects a better one), and raising the profile on how "important" marriage is, is just going to frighten or inspire people into marrying more. Hence the heartache/financial distress/"broken homes"
 

AcacianLeaves

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aquailiz said:
Did my post really anger you as such? Why don't you expand on your knowledge on the subject and enlighten me...Prove to me homosexuality is not a mental condition. Are you implying that due to my opinions and thoughts about homosexuality I should be considered crazy? I think having a restrictive, senseless, rampaging mind should be considered a mental disorder.
He doesn't need to, I already did:

AcacianLeaves said:
aquailiz said:
Homosexuality, in my opinion, is not normal. It is natural, if by natural you mean that nature "allows it" and that it occurs in nature...From what I have studied, it is a deeply intricate problem of the human psyche...Gay people now hear that they must embrace their condition and accept it...Basically, to me, someone who considers himself a homosexual is no different as a person as someone who has ADD.
It occurs in other species and throughout nature...but its a problem of the human psyche? There are over 1500 animal species that practice homosexuality. The entire Bonobo population is bisexual, does their entire species have a mental disorder? 1/4 of all Black Swan pairings are homosexual, are they also infected with this disease caused by the human psyche?

For someone who claims to have done a lot of research, it sure seems like most of your 'research' involved religious texts or outdated manuals from the 'lobotomize independent women' days of psychiatry. I don't mean to insult you, but you really need to update your research before you claim to have an informed opinion.
 

AcacianLeaves

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Verlander said:
Well, asides from the obvious lack of sexual freedoms (legally, not just morally), with marriage you loose full responsibility of your belongings after death-a spouse can appeal will desisions. You also run the risk of split estate following a divorce, and even a strong pre nup can be contended. Marriage laws generally favour the female (in a straight marriage), which is sexist, and are just generally damaging.

The pre concieved notion that marriage is a positive thing, and a must leads many people to marry prematurely, which goes someway to explaining the high divorce rates in the west. A bad split can financially cripple someone as well as emotionally, and all for a gesture. I'm good friends with many people who never married, but made symbolic and personal gestures of cimmitment to each other, and they are far happier. That marriage ring on the finger can feel like a massive restriction (which it is) and I daresay that psychologically the fact that you can't get away from your husband/wife can be incentive to try, hence unfaithfullness (note that I am not saying it IS the cause, just that it may encourage it).

The reason marriage exists is a religious thing, aimed at creating a better responisbility towards ones families. But it was an evolution in a society where mistresses and multiple women were the norm for men. In that respect, it was a positive thing. It's an important law, to stop people walking off and leaving families. Now, however, having children out of wedlock isn't as frowned upon, and non married parents have proven themselves to be just as able to raise and create a happy and positive lifestyle for their children (and in many respects a better one), and raising the profile on how "important" marriage is, is just going to frighten or inspire people into marrying more. Hence the heartache/financial distress/"broken homes"
You're right! Why would anyone want to visit their significant other in the hospital when they're in critical condition (they only allow family members in)!? Why would anyone want to leave the decision of what to do in case of their death or them being in a persistent vegetative state to someone they love?! Why would anyone want tax breaks? Why would anyone want shared income? Why would anyone want to be able to safely leave their inheritance to their significant other?

These are LEGAL benefits of marriage, despite what the psychology is. Yes, divorces are ugly - but you act like all marriage ends with divorce. Believe it or not, some people get married because they like each other and want legal recognition of their monogamy. If I wasn't married to my lovely lady when I had to spend 3 weeks in intensive care it would have ruined me, because she wouldn't be allowed to visit.
 

johnman

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LordWalter said:
johnman said:
I love it when Americans start getting into a frenzy over the constitution no matter which side they are on. The Conservatives scream that it was passed unconsitutionally and that the Obama administration wants to murder everyone in their beds because they hate America, and the Democrats argue that the entire thing was unconstitutional from the start and should be overturned.
Thank god I live in England where all our polititions may be boring old farts, but they dont try and whip up a mass frenzy of misinformation and hate.
=p True. Hey, mind if I stay at your flat for awhile? aka forever?
Sure thing, I will make up a bed for you on the floor, mind the jar of leeches, they are the house pet since regular ones are not allowed. They feed on those that displease us.
 

Buzz Killington_v1legacy

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johnman said:
Thank god I live in England where all our politicians may be boring old farts, but they dont try and whip up a mass frenzy of misinformation and hate.
Nick Griffin and the BNP would like a word...
 

ReSpawn

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Buzz Killington said:
johnman said:
Thank god I live in England where all our politicians may be boring old farts, but they dont try and whip up a mass frenzy of misinformation and hate.
Nick Griffin and the BNP would like a word...
I think he meant, at least they're incompetent at it.

The BNP are fairly ineffectual, I feel.
 

AcacianLeaves

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nhgifnd said:
AcacianLeaves said:
Yes, divorces are ugly - but you act like all marriage ends with divorce.
"50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce, according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology" No, not all, but I've seen statistics from 40-50% for first marriages. Not exactly the best odds when you're risking everything to you name.
Yeah, the divorce rate is high but to me that just makes marriage MORE important. You know when you decide to get married that you're betting against the odds. I guarantee everyone who gets married these days knows that statistic. It just makes it that much better when you survive against the odds.

You also seem to be making the assumption that all divorces are ugly affairs where your ex will try to take you for everything you have. That's certainly not the case. Divorce is just more acceptable nowadays, so when people get unhappy in a relationship they often reach a mutual decision to end things. They no longer need a gun, an alibi, and a passport.

nhgifnd said:
AcacianLeaves said:
If I wasn't married to my lovely lady when I had to spend 3 weeks in intensive care it would have ruined me, because she wouldn't be allowed to visit.
Here's an idea. Why not let the patient decide who can come see them? There's quite a few of you who are acting like marriage was created to ensure rights like this. It happened in the other order. Also, if there's someone in the hospital who's so out of it, they can't confirm if they want a visitor? They don't need any.
You are very, very wrong and have clearly never been in a hospital bed when you were that 'out of it'. First of all, I couldn't speak due to the amount of tubes shoved down my throat. I could barely move at all from the amount of pain I was in, and the doctors wouldn't want me to move anyway. I won't bother trying to explain to you how much having her there helped me, even before I was conscious - you seem like the kind of guy who would dismiss it as nonsense. Just know that it did help me, and denying someone that small comfort in a time when they need it the most because they love someone 'society' doesn't approve of is just plain evil in my mind.
 

Verlander

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AcacianLeaves said:
You're right! Why would anyone want to visit their significant other in the hospital when they're in critical condition (they only allow family members in)!? Why would anyone want to leave the decision of what to do in case of their death or them being in a persistent vegetative state to someone they love?! Why would anyone want tax breaks? Why would anyone want shared income? Why would anyone want to be able to safely leave their inheritance to their significant other?

These are LEGAL benefits of marriage, despite what the psychology is. Yes, divorces are ugly - but you act like all marriage ends with divorce. Believe it or not, some people get married because they like each other and want legal recognition of their monogamy. If I wasn't married to my lovely lady when I had to spend 3 weeks in intensive care it would have ruined me, because she wouldn't be allowed to visit.
None of those things are specific to marriage, they could all be alloted. They are also country dependant. Tax breaks are a USA law, designed to encourage people into marriage! It's like blackmail, a large majority of people in America seem to think that marriage is a moral thing to do, and that your coutrys problems will somehow resolve themselves if people married (well, ok, that's a bit strong, but the general idea is there). I guess what else can you expect from a country founded by Christian puritans...

I'm glad you are married and happy, I think that's great. But in my country you don't have to be married to visit your partner in intensive care. I also understand how people want legal recognition in their decision to become life partners, but it shouldn't be necessery to NEED legal representation. The legal system should represent those who chose not to marry, a will should be a will, and a person should have the right to decide for themselves what should happen to themselves in the situation of death or permanent vegetative state. I have already planned for it. If someone is too young to have planned, the decision should be made by next of kin, family or partner. Marriage should be irrelevant.