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FPLOON

Your #1 Source for the Dino Porn
Jul 10, 2013
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Tell Marcus to tell the other men to concentrate their firepower on the black tentacle while you tell Donald to remind you how to reload the futuristic plasma rifle, considering it doesn't seem to be "solar-powered"... Then, shine the flashlight at the black tentacle like how Alan Wake used to do it...
 

personion

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Dec 6, 2010
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dalek sec said:
Get some damn first aid, we're already half dead as it is!

Maybe try and pray to the Emperor again, it never can hurt to try.
Donald gets his best medicine man to patch you up, though the time you lose in doing so may have been valuable. Again, you pray to the God Emperor. You're not sure if it's the Emperah himself or just the face that it's been a while since seeing anything horrifying and reality-bending, but you feel slightly more sane.
Health: 7/10
Sanity: 8/10

Auron225 said:
Get back inside (no time to test out the plasma rifle - guess we'll just have to see it in action).

Have Donald arm as many people inside the building as possible and order them to watch the entrances to stop the ravenous undead getting in. Take the shotgun as a backup weapon and ask Donald to help you look for something (like coats) that could protect you both from the black rain.
You try to take the shotgun as well but both guns weigh you down too much, so Donald takes the shotgun instead. Donald shows you his extensive umbrella collection, then calls in five workers to surround the two of you with umbrellas. "This should keep the black rain off of us," beams Donald.
One of the workers, who you labeled Marie, holds a book in one hand. "Mr. Trump," says Marie, "I've been reading up on ancient history, and I've discovered that--"
"Yeah, whatever Marie," says Donald, "we don't have time for this. Everyone, grab a gun!"
Before you can react, all the workers shuffle off in different directions, grabbing pistols.
FPLOON said:
Tell Marcus to tell the other men to concentrate their firepower on the black tentacle while you tell Donald to remind you how to reload the futuristic plasma rifle, considering it doesn't seem to be "solar-powered"... Then, shine the flashlight at the black tentacle like how Alan Wake used to do it...
Unfortunately, you are too far away to shine any flashlights at the tentacle.
Donald explains that the plasma rifle runs off experimental technology that can only be recharged with uranium, but it should be good for a battle or two. You order Marcus to tell the men to attack the black tentacle. Marcus nods his head. "What about the zombies outside?" says Marie.
"Nonsense," says Donald, "our state of the art defence system will protect us as long as we have power."
Suddenly, a fourth black tentacle bursts forth from the house. The ground shakes before you, and then all the lights go out in the building. "Sir," says Marcus, "we just lost power. Seems like every building the black rain is touching has lost power.
You hear the groaning of undead entering the building. Luckily some people are already set up around the entrances, and you hear gunshots fighting them back. "Follow me," says Donald, "we'll escape out of my secret exit."
Barbas said:
Try to remember how to be fly.
You try your darnedest to remember how to be fly, but you can't. You even put a hand in a pocket and ask Donald to borrow one of his gangstah hats but despite your best work, you just can't be as fly as the other hip schuesters.
 

Barbas

ExQQxv1D1ns
Oct 28, 2013
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Attempt to meditate for a minute to maintain inner peace. Perhaps some sanity can be regained if that goddamn panda bear quits looking at me!
 

personion

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Dec 6, 2010
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Barbas said:
Attempt to meditate for a minute to maintain inner peace. Perhaps some sanity can be regained if that goddamn panda bear quits looking at me!
You swear to God, er, God-Emperor, if that panda looks at you one more time you'll snap like a delicious Twix bar. Stopping everything, you sit down, close your eyes, and breath deeply.
CrystalShadow said:
Get all twitchy, and shoot at the first thing that moves.
Donald moves. You shoot him in the back.
Shit.
Shit.
He slumps to the ground, dead. Marcus, Marie, and the rest of the workers look at you, shocked and confused, before the undead attack. One zombie rips into Marcus' leg while the workers around you carrying umbrellas are ripped to shreds.
 

dalek sec

Leader of the Cult of Skaro
Jul 20, 2008
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Grab as much ammo, batteries and any other weapons you can find and stuff it all into a big gym bag!

Try and keep your sanity with you as you bail out of there as fast as you can, something tells me the Emperor won't help you again for a long time.
 

CrystalShadow

don't upset the insane catgirl
Apr 11, 2009
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*coughs* Worth it! XD

Uhh. Now what though? We have a tentacle monster to murder.
Ah!

Take one of the umbrellas, and run towards the source of the problem, trying to shield myself from the rain.
 

personion

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Dec 6, 2010
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Barbas said:
Point at Donald, drop to your knees and shout "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
You give your best Darth Vader impression. It's a truly moving display. Well, it would be moving if anybody had any time to appreciate your raw emotion. Instead, people are just getting ripped apart and devoured by zombies.
CrystalShadow said:
Take one of the umbrellas, and run towards the source of the problem, trying to shield myself from the rain.
You grab one of the umbrellas out of Marie's hands as a horde of undead descend upon her. Sweet!

Inventory: Flashlight, Tree Branch, Plasma Rifle, Umbrella

dalek sec said:
Grab as much ammo, batteries and any other weapons you can find and stuff it all into a big gym bag!

Try and keep your sanity with you as you bail out of there as fast as you can, something tells me the Emperor won't help you again for a long time.
While there is no gym bag in sight, you do find a Trump Knapsack you shove most of your inventory and some other useful things in. As you leave, you manage to snag:
A pistol with five bullets(from the workers getting eaten by zombies)
A tuna loaf (from Marie's lunch)
A grappling hook (from Trump Towers' room filled with grappling hooks)
A green potion (you have no idea what it does but you found it on the ground)
A wallet filled with money (from Donald. Sorry, Donald.)

You flee outside, shielding yourself from the rain with the umbrella. You are slightly over-encumbered with the unwieldy plasma rifle and are surprised by a zombie. Its hands clench around your throat as its mouth moves towards your face. One of your arms is raised protectively in the air, blocking the black rain from above with the umbrella. The zombie's hand clenches around your throat.

Barbas said:
Apologize to the audience for this frankly embarrassing display.
The fourth wall breaks down for a moment and you take a second to apologize to the audience. You have an existential crisis, realizing that you yourself are both the person being throttled by a zombie, the person deciding what decisions are made, and the person passively enjoying the story without actively participating in it. "I'm sorry," you say.

CrystalShadow said:
Then mock the audience thoroughly.
"Sorry you're all so DUMB," you say. Existentially you realize that you're insulting yourself as well as the rest of the audience, but you take a minute to appreciate that SICK BURN regardless.

The fourth wall closes back up. You are now being throttled by a zombie in the black rain. Far off in the distance, four black tentacles piece the heavens.

Health: 6/10
Sanity: 8/10
Inventory: Flashlight (Full Battery), Tree Branch, Plasma Rifle, Pistol, Tuna Loaf, Grappling Hook, Wallet, Green Potion
 

dalek sec

Leader of the Cult of Skaro
Jul 20, 2008
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Smack the zombies with the tree branch and use the grappling hook to reach a low level building.
 

personion

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Dec 6, 2010
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dalek sec said:
Smack the zombies with the tree branch and use the grappling hook to reach a low level building.
With your free hand you bat away the zombie with the tree branch and get back to your feet. You find a low-level building and fire your grappling hook to the top. With one hand you climb up, struggling to carry your weight up the building. As you are climbing up the building, you see a window open above you. Out of it pops the head of the corpse of that woman you saw inside the house where the tentacles are coming from. "Oh, hello gorgeous," you hear whispering out of her mouth. The corpse's head is pointed towards you. "Still alive? That won't do. You'd be much more suitable dead." She produces a knife and from her pocket and starts cutting your rope. Aw hell naw.
 

Auron225

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Oct 26, 2009
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Tell the she-corpse that if she lets you live, you'll kill the person of her choice (excluding yourself of course) so that they can join her as a corpse. Remind her of Donald and how handsome he was - really try to sell him to her! ;)

...What?? We already murdered our only friend for no damn reason; might as well try and make one!
 

dalek sec

Leader of the Cult of Skaro
Jul 20, 2008
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Using a point of your sanity, you slow down the world Max Payne style as you line up your shot with the pistol and fire at the she-corpse.

Sadly this leaves you ridden with angst Max Payne style at the death of yet another woman.
 

personion

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Dec 6, 2010
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dalek sec said:
Using a point of your sanity, you slow down the world Max Payne style as you line up your shot with the pistol and fire at the she-corpse.

Sadly this leaves you ridden with angst Max Payne style at the death of yet another woman.
You consider how you would fire at the woman while climbing the grappling hook. With one hand protecting yourself from the rain with the umbrella and the other hand holding onto the grappling hook rope, you don't have another hand to use to fire at the woman. You also wish that your sanity worked like an MP system that you could use to pull video-game inspired tricks like that, and you probably could in a better position, but right now you're not in any position to pull things like that. You make a note to use some Sanity in a pinch to slow down time, but now is not the (bullet) time for that.

Auron225 said:
Tell the she-corpse that if she lets you live, you'll kill the person of her choice (excluding yourself of course) so that they can join her as a corpse. Remind her of Donald and how handsome he was - really try to sell him to her!
She stops cutting your rope midway to listen to you. "Smart, resourceful, rich," she mulls to herself after your explanation. "A zombie like that would be an excellent addition to my army... and, let's be honest, probably make a better lover than you, considering you're of ambiguous gender, race, age, size, and any other defining traits. I'm not quite sure why I was interested in you to begin with."
Ouch. She seems up for it, though.
 

dalek sec

Leader of the Cult of Skaro
Jul 20, 2008
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I leave in a huff, climbing past her and hoping not to run into any more trouble before I reach the top of the building.

(I'm not posting too much here am I?)
 

personion

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Dec 6, 2010
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dalek sec said:
I leave in a huff, climbing past her and hoping not to run into any more trouble before I reach the top of the building.

(I'm not posting too much here am I?)
(Not at all)
You climb past her, heading towards the top of the building. "Remember," she says, "Donald's corpse, to my feet. Fail me and I'll see to it my zombie army descends upon you."
You make it to the top of the building and wipe some sweat off your brow. An undead that you hadn't seen grabs you by the leg. You jump with a start. "And know this:," says the zombie in the voice of the woman, "I'm always watching."
The zombie collapses, dead in front of you. She's definitely in control of the undead. You start to wonder if everything you saw in that house had a piece to play in the coming apocalypse. Off in the distance, the four black tentacles flail. You can see a row of buildings leading towards them that you could take to avoid the ground. Otherwise, you're on the top of a low-rise building, surrounded by other buildings of various sizes, about a kilometre away from the four tentacles.
 

dalek sec

Leader of the Cult of Skaro
Jul 20, 2008
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I leap to the roof of the next small building, hopefully I can find someplace to hide and get some distance between me and the corpse lady.