Critical Miss: Skyrim Tales

[Char-Nobyl]

Now this comic makes it clear why Critical Miss won that contest way back when.

Though I'm a little baffled that she actually tried to make a character themed around three non-combat skills. It's a shame she didn't include alchemy on that list of things she was leveling, considering that the easiest way to do that is to devour the random crap you find in the woods/on dead monsters, which seems like a horrific idea for an aspiring chemist.

Or, alternatively, it means that every alchemist in Skyrim is a balls-to-the-walls badass who can probably shoot venom out of their eyes or something.

 

[Mortuorum]

Paralysis poisons for the win.

 

[Frostbite3789]

If I ever see a Dragur named Ivan with a blonde crew cut played by Dolph Lundgren, I will crap my pants and run.

 

[Bujiraso]

I never have bwahahahah'd at a Critical Miss more than this.
Favourite comic ever

 

[figment of mind]

but they ain't got shit on Mudcrabs

True. Saw a mudcrab kill a bear yesterday...said bear was after me but after losing a quarter of it's health it turned to the crab...and the crab murdered it without losing as much as an 8th of it's health.

Yeah, I immediatly turned tail and ran from that thing (It killed a bear. I can't kill bears. Obviously i was out of my league).

 

[SomeLameStuff]

My stealth skill is so ridiculously high none of the enemies can even spot me unless I physically bump into them, even if I'm pumping them full of arrows. Working on smithing and enchanting now that everyone says they're OP. =P

 

[Otaku World Order]

If I ever see a Dragur named Ivan with a blonde crew cut played by Dolph Lundgren, I will crap my pants and run.

Ivan Dragur: I must break you.

 

[The Lugz]

Disregard Speech, Acquire Shouts

The internet in a nutshell, ladies and gents.

insert vaguely related clip here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMlKmELIhgY

the world is just better at high volume, i mean.. really.

also, need bass?
FAS DOOH RAWRRRRR

kay? kk.

My stealth skill is so ridiculously high none of the enemies can even spot me unless I physically bump into them, even if I'm pumping them full of arrows. Working on smithing and enchanting now that everyone says they're OP. =P

they airent op, that sugguests limits.
you can literally get + 400 damage on a weapon AND dual 50++ magic school damage of your choice
with your stealth bonus, you'd be one-shoting a mob so hard you'd slip right through him and crack the world.
( like my metaphor? i did. )

 

[mortalsatsuma]

I have a level 66 Warrior character and they give me next to no problems. generally the only enemies I encounter in crypts now are deathlord overlords and dragon priests. they're really not hard. Like at all. They take a load of damage but do next to none back.

 

[PsychoticMango]

Actually for my second character I leveled Speechcraft, Alchemy, Smithing, and Enchanting all the way to 100 before any of my other skills were even to 30. I was around level 35 before I even set foot outside a city.

Normally I would have been slaughtered by a mudcrab at this point - especially since I only play on the highest difficulty level - but by combining Alchemy, Smithing, and Enchanting together I was able to create a set of power armor so strong that I could take a giant down in like 3 hits.

I found it very amusing that some skinny, weak merchant Breton with no combat training could all of a sudden run through a dungeon one-shotting everything once he put on his gear.

 

[ZenoX969]

I've run into this problem with my second character, the master thief. With Pickpocket at 100 now, Sneak at 75, One-handed at 30 and Illusion at 77 (Which came after I realised how fucked I was everytime I got noticed).

Actually nevermind all that. As long as I stay undetected or have a Calm spell ready, It's all fine now. It's actually extremely easy now after I trained my Illusion skill and got the Invisibility spell and the perk 'Quiet Spellcasting', because I can literally just sneak around inches away from an enemy and re-cast the invisibility spell whenever it runs out. But before that... I died in a couple of hits. The second I got caught I was fucked.

I did also realise that I'd need something for dragons. So I trained my Destruction skill to 50 and got a few perks in that tree for ranged attacks (can't stand bows).

Oh and another thing I HATE with Skyrim's leveling system. Is that getting better in Lockpicking doesn't count for anything unless you get the respective perks. So that's all just wasted on leveling up me, and enemies, quicker. Because I don't even need the perks that makes it easier to pick.

The same thing goes for Alchemy, Enchanting and Smithing. Actually getting a higher level in those skills don't count for anything unless you get the perks. I didn't even see the point in spending perk-points into Enchanting when I would just find better enchanted items in random chests. The only thing I used Enchanting for was to enchant daggers and other lightweight items so that I'd get more money for selling them. Like taking an Iron Dagger that's worth about 10 gold, enchanting it with the most valuable enchantment you know, using a petty soul gem, and turning the value into anything from around 300 to 400 gold.

 

[Jandau]

Well, yeah, it is possible to corner yourself, or at least make your life harder at some point. The question you should ask yourself is "How can my skills benefit me when out in the world". You leveled Smithing? You should be able to craft awesome gear and then upgrade it to insane levels, giving you an edge in combat. You leveled Alchemy? Shouldn't you be chugging potions that boost all your stats and damage while giving you every resistance imaginable? You leveled Speech and Pickpocketing? Shouldn't you be using all the money you make with those skills on better items, better spells or simply training in combat skills?

Make use of all your talents, even the non-combat ones.

 

[newwiseman]

You were close to the god build of alchemy, enchanting, whatever else. With Alchemy and enchanting you can boost every other skill off the charts and break the game. There is actually a loop of enchanting alchemy buffs and then making potions that boost you enchanting, you can eventually make +1500 whatever-skill armor enchantments.

One hitting a dragon with you bare hands never really gets old. Sadly the rest of the game does... it's fine if you don't go overboard; after all what's life without a little challenge.

 

[chaos order]

i prefer being a sneaky conjurer than skilling any non combat skill. its fun to listen to your enemies ramblings then, POOF! DREMORA LORD! i love it when he runs into battle yelling "COME AT ME WEAKLINGS!"

 

[rembrandtqeinstein]

Get a buddy.

I took a bunch of steroids/potions and buffed myself first and beat up the tough chick in the Whiterun tavern and she became my traveling bodyguard.

She does the hammertime thing while I sit back and buff, debuff, summon, heal up my initial damage, then when my magick is down I pop a bound sword, strap on my magic resist shield and wade in gandalf style.

It makes for really fun gameplay.

My first two traveling buddies died and then I got this one, and I even have another "on deck" in case this one croaks.

 

[Zenn3k]

Game is much better if your ignore the crafting skills completely.

 

[-|-]

Speechcraft is easy to level up compared to alteration. As a mage I almost never find a use for its spells but I'd like the protective perks. Kind of sad that I'm probably going to have to buy my way to it.

Don't wear any armour and use ironflesh with a couple of multiplier perks. You have to cast every minute so it soon levels up.

 

[Njaard]

Smithing and one handed dualwield is the shit. I two shot EVERYTHING apart from dragons (which I four shot) on Master difficulty with my 200+ damage weapons.