Do I deserve to be spat on for saying this to a gay person?

[s0denone]

If I take the story of the OP at face value, of course I agree with all the other sheep in this topic. The spitter was wrong and your friend is completely justified, man! Oh boy! Isn't it fun to have a topic where practically everyone agrees?

OF COURSE, THE OP'S STORY IS FULL OF SHIT

I don't believe for a second that your friend was polite when he asked those guys to stop. I know your friend's type. At the very least he'd say something that was funny in a smug, predictable, dumb way. Naivety offends me to no end, and this topic has made me furious.

And no, I have no idea if what he actually said was enough to warrant spitting. It'd have to be pretty damn nasty... No, it would have to border on threatening to warrant spitting. But given the fact that your friend is unwilling to even admit what he said, I have no choice but to assume he had it coming.

Of course, it is quite the curiosity how "your friend" managed to get distracted by the couple kissing. I don't know how theaters in Ireland work, but where I live they turn off the lights in the audience when the movie starts. You wouldn't be able to see two people kissing in the next row, unless you were specifically staring at them. Which also brings up the question: If the theater was almost empty, why did they sit so close to the couple? And what did they expect a couple at the movies to do? Kiss? A couple kissing at the movies?? Why, that's completely unheard of!

Calm the fuck down.

You're entitled to your very presumptuous way of writing and debating, but please - it's just silly and uncalled for.
We know only what the OP has written.

You making statements like "I know the type" when you have no idea who or what type of person the friend is, is much worse than simply "being offended at gays kissing".

Seriously. Calm down.

There is a chance that the friend of the OP twisted the story. But you know - there's also a chance that he didn't. Maybe stop unnecessary stupid assumptions, unless you really want to go the dickish route.

 

[sarge1942]

definately didn't deserve to be spat on, all this equality stuff is getting out of hand, i'm all for equality but the bloody newspaper getting involved is just... no. If he had spat on me i would have done alot worse, no matter who it was your friend was completely justified in my mind.

 

[interspark]

he didnt deserve to be spat on but i think its an unfair discrimination, i mean, if he'd been comfortable with a man and woman kissing in front of him then maybe, on some sub-concious level, he is homophobic. gays have just as much a right to express themselves as anyone else and everyone else is free to feel what they want as long as they keep it to themselves!

edit: heres another thought, think about how you/your friend would have felt if it were girls kissing in front of you

 

[SloLynx]

I'm kinnda skeptical about this. I mean, if you were out with your girlfriend (saying this for guys) and you would make out, wouldn't it suck if someone would spoil that perfect moment by basicly saying "Listen, go do your face-sucking elswhere, some of us want to see a movie!"?

You probably wouldn't spat on him/her, but you would be pissed off, right?

Still, I believe that the gay person thought, that your friend was being homophobic and got everything wrong.

 

[interspark]

If I take the story of the OP at face value, of course I agree with all the other sheep in this topic. The spitter was wrong and your friend is completely justified, man! Oh boy! Isn't it fun to have a topic where practically everyone agrees?

OF COURSE, THE OP'S STORY IS FULL OF SHIT

I don't believe for a second that your friend was polite when he asked those guys to stop. I know your friend's type. At the very least he'd say something that was funny in a smug, predictable, dumb way. Naivety offends me to no end, and this topic has made me furious.

And no, I have no idea if what he actually said was enough to warrant spitting. It'd have to be pretty damn nasty... No, it would have to border on threatening to warrant spitting. But given the fact that your friend is unwilling to even admit what he said, I have no choice but to assume he had it coming.

Of course, it is quite the curiosity how "your friend" managed to get distracted by the couple kissing. I don't know how theaters in Ireland work, but where I live they turn off the lights in the audience when the movie starts. You wouldn't be able to see two people kissing in the next row, unless you were specifically staring at them. Which also brings up the question: If the theater was almost empty, why did they sit so close to the couple? And what did they expect a couple at the movies to do? Kiss? A couple kissing at the movies?? Why, that's completely unheard of!

i agree that the story seems a bit unlikely, from what was said ive no dought that there was more to the story to warrant being spat in the face, perhaps some kind of subtle insult when asking the couple to cut it out, it is common to twist the truth to make our side of the story more favourable, sorry im babbling, long story short i agree with you, there is very little we can judge of the event from what the op says

 

[Yeslek Ssomllur]

What I meant by people going "look at me, I'm so gay!" is people who build their entire personality -- their purpose in life -- around a cliché stereotype they gleaned from Ugly Betty and Project Runway. They're just drones, built in the image of a media-driven cultural fad, who feel they need to be more obnoxious than everyone else, just to stand out.

Oh. Yes. This.
Yeah, that's unforgivably annoying. I agree. It actually is hurting the image of gay rights.
I have a gay college roommate who is covered in piercings and geeky video game and metal tee-shirts (I affectionately refer to him as my "punk-rock queer"), and he almost has an allergic reaction to lisping "Sex and the City" fans with little yappy-type dogs and limp arms. They are only that way because the media told them how to be, he figures, so he has no interest in them. Needless to say his dating pool is a little small...

 

[dex-dex]

the dude took it has stop being gay and making out not just stop making out because you getting pretty loud with you saliva swapping!

it is understandable but there was no reason to spit in your friend's face.

 

[Cutlesnap]

Calm the fuck down.

You're entitled to your very presumptuous way of writing and debating, but please - it's just silly and uncalled for.
We know only what the OP has written.

You making statements like "I know the type" when you have no idea who or what type of person the friend is, is much worse than simply "being offended at gays kissing".

Seriously. Calm down.

There is a chance that the friend of the OP twisted the story. But you know - there's also a chance that he didn't. Maybe stop unnecessary stupid assumptions, unless you really want to go the dickish route.

"Being offended at gays kissing" isn't the problem. 7 pages of everybody agreeing with each other because they believe a clearly untrue story is the problem. Hey, I don't like looking at men kissing either! But reading 7 pages of people not once questioning this story (Did the OP leave? Has he lost the ability to reply?) offends me to no end.

Also, you might think I'm a dick for getting angry at this, but I think your a smug, pompous ass for telling me to "calm down".

 

[Blind Sight]

Idiots (the gay guys)...you sit in the back of the theatre if you want to make out, it's just common curiosity, I mean, you get some privacy and you let people who are actually watching the movie have better seats, everyone wins. It's even worse in some university lectures I've been in, where people treat it like it's the bloody movie theatre, show some respect people.

Nope, not something that you should get spat on for, I probably would've done the same thing in your position, and I'm not even disgusted by two guys making out.

And for all those people saying 'he's obviously not telling the real story, in the real story his friend is a homophobic asshole' let me just say this: some homosexuals get EXTREMELY offended if you try and interfere in their lifestyle choices. I had a lamp thrown at me by my gay roommate last year after I told him and his boyfriend to stop fucking at midnight when I had work at seven the next morning. He clearly took what I had said the wrong way.

 

[ICanBreakTheseCuffs]

aaaaah the Irish

[edit]no not really if they're disturbing you it's not your fault

 

[kronoset]

I wrote the title in first person so it'd be more immediate and attention-grabbing, but this actually happened to a friend of mine (yeah right, I'm sure you're thinking). Though it could hypothetically happen to me.

My friend and I have discussed how we feel about homosexuality, and we generally agreed that we accept it as long as it's not annoying or obnoxious, just like everything else. We don't like gays going all "look at me, I'm so gay!" just as we dislike emos going "look at me, I'm all deep and dark!" or political extremists or whatever. We're both friends with a gay guy, and we treat him the same as anyone else (I mean, we "tease" him about it, but he doesn't mind, and he slags us right back. Everyone's got something to rip on).

But one thing was that it always creeped me out to see guys kiss. I don't think I'm really alone on this. It's like the equivalent of watching someone pick their nose. It's just... eew. It's not something I have any control over, it just disturbs me on a fundamental level. People have been throwing slogans around like "homosexuality isn't a choice, but homophobia is", and I'd have to say that if being a bit disgusted by men kissing is homophobic, then it really isn't a choice. If I had a choice, I wouldn't choose to be disgusted by anything. (On a side note, I always hated the word "homophobe". 'Homos' means 'one and the same', so 'homophobia' would technically mean 'a pathological fear of things staying the same')

Anyway, here's the thing. Recently my friend and his friend went to see Inception (I think), and the cinema was fairly empty, except for these two other guys in front of them. And halfway through the film these two other guys got bored, for whatever reason, and started making out. And my friend was distracted, and grossed out, and couldn't enjoy the film properly. So, never being one to suffer in silence, he gently (according to him) said something alone the lines of "here lads, would you give it a rest? We're trying to watch a movie". And then, one of the guys turned and spat directly into my friend's face.

This apparently resulted in a big brawl (as all things in Ireland inevitably do), and everyone was ejected from the cinema. The local newspaper even caught wind of it, spinning the whole thing to sound like some sort of hate crime riot.


So, what do you think? Was my friend being intolerant, and deserved what he got? Were the homosexual couple being rude, and should've stopped when asked? Did they overreact? Do you think gays in general seem to be more intolerant of people expressing their feelings about homosexuality than heterosexuals are? Or do you think the homosexual community should take a zero tolerance policy to any form of discrimination?

I'm not really sure what to believe.

It seems that your friend was annoyed by the fact that two people were vigorously making out in front of him, not because they were both men. He doesn't deserve to be spat on (no matter what his beliefs are). Here's the scummy response to two guys kissing in front of you.

"hey faggos, take yer queer asses outta dis here theater"

I dunno if you have any American rednecks in Ireland, but I guess that'd be what it would be like.

 

[RamirezDoEverything]

They were being rude. Your friend was justified in asking them to stop. They were there to view a movie. Not to (as the English say it) snog.

Its sad the papers rolled it as an anti gay thing. If it was a man and a woman I'd tell them to stop, its ridiculous.

I agree, it's straight up awkward whether it's a gay couple or a straight couple. If you want to just make out, then go home and do that or in some sort of private place, don't interupt other people's fun.

 

[Meggiepants]

Well, seeing as all this is hearsay, and I can't really know what went on, I'll say this:

If I was in a theater, and a couple in front of me started making out, no matter their sex, I would move if it was possible. If it was not possible, I would ask someone in charge if either 1: I could get a ticket to another showing and explain why, or 2: see if their was some way to make them stop.

Someone making out in front of you is distracting, even if they aren't moaning. Hell, someone bopping their head in front of you is distracting. But quite frankly, these two were probably exhibitionists. Everyone knows the back row is for making out. If that is your goal, you go back there where no one has to see you.

I'm a non-confrontational sort of person, so directly speaking to the offending couple wouldn't be my cup of tea, mostly because you never know how they will react. I would expect to, at the very least, be cussed at and told to mind my own business. Even so, if your friend said what you say he said, then the spitting is unjustified.

 

[Zykon TheLich]

He could have just ignored them or moved away a bit. I would ask him what his exact words were, but if that was all he said then spitting in his face straight away then that was a big over reaction and totally undeserved.

 

[Captain Pancake]

I think the gay guy was very quick to play the "Hate crime" card. There's this annoying, small and quite intimidating guy at my school called Dammi. He just so happens to be black. if I were to confront him about his douchebaggery, and he were to play the "Is it cause I'm black?" card, I would say, "No, it's because you're a dick". This scenario is very similar, if they would jump so quickly to that conclusion then it shows they're not secure with their sexuality, as he couldn't see that he was just distracting you and your friend.

 

[Dags90]

"Being offended at gays kissing" isn't the problem. 7 pages of everybody agreeing with each other because they believe a clearly untrue story is the problem. Hey, I don't like looking at men kissing either! But reading 7 pages of people not once questioning this story (Did the OP leave? Has he lost the ability to reply?) offends me to no end.

Also, you might think I'm a dick for getting angry at this, but I think your a smug, pompous ass for telling me to "calm down".

There aren't 7 pages of universal agreement, there are some people who consider the scenario unlikely (though they are few). The OP later stated that his friend 'probably wouldn't have cared or said anything if it were a heterosexual couple' later on. A lot of people preface their opinions with 'as long as he's treating everyone the same'.

The OP presents an extremely ambiguous and vague scenario and people are just painting their revenge fantasies onto it. Just report the posts you find unacceptable. My favorite was the one about "militant homosexuals", it sounds like something from Fox News.

 

[chartoc]

Your friend had a point to ask them to stop. Nobody, gay or Straight, should spit on the person ask to stop making out in a public place and speaking as gay 20 year old would have punch the man in the face.

 

[Cutlesnap]

...

There aren't 7 pages of universal agreement, there are some people who consider the scenario unlikely. The OP later stated that his friend probably wouldn't have cared or said anything if it were a heterosexual couple. Just report the posts you find unacceptable. My favorite was the one about "militant homosexuals", it sounds like something from Fox News.

Well, it may not have been universal, but it was pretty close to that. And when I see that kind of groupthink, I get pissed off, and start swinging my verbal bat. When people won't wake up through gentle pushing, the verbal bat becomes necessary.

 

[godofallu]

If the theater was empty why sit directly behind them and stare the entire time?