Do you know ANYONE who has actually gone from gay to straight post-puberty?

[u2rocksbaby]

I am not asking if you know a bisexual! Okay, now that I've cleared that up, I was wondering if you or someone you know has at one time been a self-accepting homosexual, and then become heterosexual. I've certainly never heard of such a case, and I'm curious about its biological plausibility, as many people seem to think it is possible for very non-biologically based reasons.

 

[No_Remainders]

Well, one would have to assume it happens, considering the opposite has been known to happen.

I dunno of anyone though, no.

 

[gewata]

Well, one would have to assume it happens, considering the opposite has been known to happen.

I don't think people go from staright to gay, but instead repress their sexuality for their early life and embrace it later on.

 

[StrixMaxima]

The issue here is not biological, for the most part, it is psychological.

And I know of a man who spent his early teens and adulthood as a gay man and shortly before 30 declared himself straight. He is currently married and has 2 children.

No, he didn't turn to religion or anything. He simply decided he would be happier a straight person, and stopped seeing men.

Did he really stop? Only he would know. But he's been steady with women for some time now. No angst, no internal dilemma. Simply his personal decision of changing his sexual outlook.

 

[u2rocksbaby]

Interesting theory. However, nobody's ever feared being shunned for coming out as heterosexual, while only in the last few years have homosexuals even started to become widely accepted by society. My own theory is that most if not all heterosexuals-turned-homosexuals were keeping it a secret from an intolerant and mistrusting world, which is partly why I asked this question in the opposite way.

 

[emeraldrafael]

I know someone who went the opposite way.

Though why one way is acceptable and the other is not I have no idea. I would imagine it could go vice versa.

 

[AndyFromMonday]

The issue here is not biological, for the most part, it is psychological.

And I know of a man who spent his early teens and adulthood as a gay man and shortly before 30 declared himself straight. He is currently married and has 2 children.

No, he didn't turn to religion or anything. He simply decided he would be happier a straight person, and stopped seeing men.

Did he really stop? Only he would know. But he's been steady with women for some time now. No angst, no internal dilemma. Simply his personal decision of changing his sexual outlook.

Homosexual people often do that in order to conform with society. Being homosexual isn't easy since you have to endure a lot of abuse and people telling you that you're essentially broken. Since the guy's not saying anything he's probably in a lot of pain over his decision but chooses to hide his feelings, probably due to not wanting to disappoint the women he married and the children they had. Or maybe he was just bisexual, who knows.

OT: Your sexuality is set even before birth. You can't change that and hell, why would you want to? Do whatever makes you happy and fuck everyone else.

 

[StrixMaxima]

Homosexual people often do that in order to conform with society. Being homosexual isn't easy since you have to endure a lot of abuse and people telling you that you're essentially broken. Since the guy's not saying anything he's probably in a lot of pain over his decision but chooses to hide his feelings, probably due to not wanting to disappoint the women he married and the children they had. Or maybe he was just bisexual, who knows.

OT: Your sexuality is set even before birth. You can't change that and hell, why would you want to? Do whatever makes you happy and fuck everyone else.

I know a lot of homosexual people. I know their suffering, and many of them chose to confide their plight to me. I've heard many stories of broken homes, unreceptive parents, lost jobs, depression, suicidal thoughts, religious self-shame, etc.

I mentioned this person's case since he is the exception to the norm: he had a happy homosexual life (as happy as society can allow), had decent partners and a supportive family. He had some doubts, which is to be expected, but he clearly stated that there wasn't pain and suffering during his decision to change sexual partner choices. That's why I chose to share his story. I don't think suffering is the sole path from and to sexuality.

 

[AndyFromMonday]

That's why I chose to share his story. I don't think suffering is the sole path from and to sexuality.

Your sexuality cannot be changed. This isn't a psychological thing where if you motivate yourself you'll eventually be able to achieve anything, this is a genetic thing. If you are gay, you will always be sexually attracted to people of the same gender as you. There's no going around that. The person in question is either hiding his plight or is bisexual.

 

[Scipio1770]

OT: Your sexuality is set even before birth. You can't change that and hell, why would you want to? Do whatever makes you happy and fuck everyone else.

I think you're putting way too much emphasis on genetics in this, sexual and emotional behaviors are heavily influenced by social environment, education, hormonal balance, etc. the person's gnome is hardly the defining trait in determining sexuality.

 

[StrixMaxima]

Your sexuality cannot be changed. This isn't a psychological thing where if you motivate yourself you'll eventually be able to achieve anything, this is a genetic thing. If you are gay, you will always be sexually attracted to people of the same gender as you. There's no going around that. The person in question is either hiding his plight or is bisexual.

Scipio up there summed up what I'd say quite well. The link between sexuality orientation and genetics/psychology is still full of gray zones, and I think it is a bit foolhardy to put all your chips into one or the other.

I've heard way too many stories to think this is simply a genetic issue. The society we live in interfere profoundly in all our behavioral actions.

And, I would never say that "If you are gay, you are gay" with such confidence, just as I'd never state that heterosexuality is etched in stone.

We need to accept we don't know as much as we think we do, when we are talking about the brain and its processes.

 

[AndyFromMonday]

OT: Your sexuality is set even before birth. You can't change that and hell, why would you want to? Do whatever makes you happy and fuck everyone else.

I think you're putting way too much emphasis on genetics in this, sexual and emotional behaviors are heavily influenced by social environment, education, hormonal balance, etc. the person's gnome is hardly the defining trait in determining sexuality.

Yes it is, especially when it comes to sexual attraction and to an extent even emotional attraction since emotional attraction is just another form of sexual attraction. If you're gay, you will always be gay. There's no going back. Society might pressure homosexuals into a relationship with the opposite gender but you will never be sexually attracted to a person of the opposite sex if you're gay. Education and hormones have no effect on a person's sexuality. If you're born gay, you will always be gay and I cannot stress this enough.

 

[AndyFromMonday]

Scipio up there summed up what I'd say quite well. The link between sexuality orientation and genetics/psychology is still full of gray zones, and I think it is a bit foolhardy to put all your chips into one or the other.

I've heard way too many stories to think this is simply a genetic issue. The society we live in interfere profoundly in all our behavioral actions.

And, I would never say that "If you are gay, you are gay" with such confidence, just as I'd never state that heterosexuality is etched in stone.

We need to accept we don't know as much as we think we do, when we are talking about the brain and its processes.

The causes of homosexuality might be relatively unknown but what is known for sure, 100%, is that your sexual orientation is not a choice, it never has been a choice and trying to pass it off as a choice is just a way to further stigmatize the gay community. Your sexual orientation is NOT a choice, it's NOT a mental disorder and it can never, ever, EVER be changed.

 

[RGman]

I think you're putting way too much emphasis on genetics in this, sexual and emotional behaviors are heavily influenced by social environment, education, hormonal balance, etc. the person's gnome is hardly the defining trait in determining sexuality.

Well, take a look at this one then:

Spoiler

Oh yeah baby! Your argument needs revision.

 

[StrixMaxima]

The causes of homosexuality might be relatively unknown but what is known for sure, 100%, is that your sexual orientation is not a choice, it never has been a choice and trying to pass it off as a choice is just a way to further stigmatize the gay community. Your sexual orientation is NOT a choice, it's NOT a mental disorder and it can never, ever, EVER be changed.

I never said it was a choice. And if you think I'm treating homosexuality as some kind of disease, you are wrong. However, no matter how many bold words you use, we must accept that we don't know exactly what is the homosexual behavior, where does it stem from, and just how deeply the environment plays a role in it.

But I do believe that your sexual orientation can change, during the course of your life, environment and experiences. To and from homosexuality.

Don't be so defensive. No one is talking about social stigmas, here.

 

[Woodsey]

Well, one would have to assume it happens, considering the opposite has been known to happen.

I dunno of anyone though, no.

I think that's just people assuming they're straight and then realising, not actually being straight and then turning gay.

OT: Well, never heard of it outside a few people who have been brainwashed by nutters at special summer camps.

I suppose someone, somewhere has mistaken themselves for gay though.

 

[Scipio1770]

Education and hormones have no effect on a person's sexuality. If you're born gay, you will always be gay and I cannot stress this enough.

I'm curious as to how exactly you are so sure of this, there have been hundreds of studies conducted in search for a combination of "homosexual trigger genes" and none have been able to conclusively disprove the null hypothesis. Please refer me to the geneticist who is telling you otherwise.

Sexual behavior is affected by a HUGE range of factors: cultural education, gender identity, social evolution, etc etc.

You cant seriously believe the old eugenic fallacy that a person's personality is utterly predetermined by his DNA.

 

[thebobmaster_v1legacy]

The causes of homosexuality might be relatively unknown but what is known for sure, 100%, is that your sexual orientation is not a choice, it never has been a choice and trying to pass it off as a choice is just a way to further stigmatize the gay community. Your sexual orientation is NOT a choice, it's NOT a mental disorder and it can never, ever, EVER be changed.

I never said it was a choice. And if you think I'm treating homosexuality as some kind of disease, you are wrong. However, no matter how many bold words you use, we must accept that we don't know exactly what is the homosexual behavior, where does it stem from, and just how deeply the environment plays a role in it.

But I do believe that your sexual orientation can change, during the course of your life, environment and experiences. To and from homosexuality.

Don't be so defensive. No one is talking about social stigmas, here.

I agree with you except for the third paragraph. We don't really know what causes it. However, choice definitely doesn't play into it. If people could choose to be gay or straight...why the hell would you choose the less popular "get you bashed" option?

That said, I am ambisextrous. And I identified as straight all throughout high school, and denied any signs of attraction to males for a long time.

But the only thing I can think of that could result in an honest-to-God orientation change is a traumatizing experience, like rape. I can see that resulting in wanting nothing more to do with that gender, and going to the other one.

But is that really an orientation change? No, it's not. It's situational sexuality. Not the same thing.

To put a nerd spin on it, are people claiming Buffy Summers is bisexual after laying with Satsu in the season 8 comics? No. They just think that Buffy found comfort with Satsu.