Erm, the first time I had sex was a complete mess. I was nervous as shit, she was nervous as shit, so that's always fun, but it's fairly normal too. What actually made things interesting was that it took me over an hour to actually get into her because she was so tight (or I was just that big... I like to think it was the second one, but it's probably a combination of the two). I would move in a little bit, and she would squeal (not in a good way) and move away. Then we'd try again and I would get a little further, only to have her squeal and pull away. I finally got most of the way in and she started crying because it hurt so bad.
But wait! It gets better! So, naturally, after an hour of trying to keep it up I eventually just flop over. She doesn't quite realize this, so she's finally ready to go and I'm sitting there trying to get it back up, and she won't even put her hand on me, much less give me a blowjob or something to get it up. So I'm sitting there making excuses so she doesn't feel bad ("I'm just really nervous hun, I don't want to hurt you"), but she ends up feeling bad anyway.
Eventually, after another half hour or so of trying and failing to get it up, we decide to roll over, go to sleep, and wait until morning. Thankfully, I wake up in the middle of the night, ready to go, and we get the deed done then. Surprisingly gracefully I might add, especially compared to the debacle that had occurred before.
Got another good one for you all. Somehow, and I'm still not really sure how (I'm thinking either a drunk night or a chain of storytelling leading back to my girlfriend) my roommates found out that I could helicopter my junk damned well. It has since become a running joke, and whenever my girlfriend is over my roommates will start making helicopter noises randomly... Of course, it has earned me the right to brag a bit, so I suppose it's worth it. It's also ended up being quite the thing to stick into conversations. Roommate's friend was having dinner with us, and she somehow got on the topic of if you were taking a shower and someone pulled back the curtain with a knife, what would you do? Well, my immediate answer was "I would distract them with a well-timed helicopter, then punch them in the face."
Let's see here... What else... There have been a few times playing Halo (or CoD, or whatever else) where my girlfriend will decide to go down on me, and I'll just stop mid-match and we'll go at it. This can get awkward when you're on XBL with a buddy and don't bother turning off the mic, then end up rolling on it during sex... Gotten some interesting comments from those, and the sad thing is that it's happened more than once.
Also, for a year I lived with my girlfriend's brother as a roommate. He had the room next to mine, and we shared the bathroom. There were some interesting conversations there, ranging from "using" the shower to how he would go to bed with headphones on when my girlfriend came over. She can get loud at times... It was always fun, if he was being annoying, just to kindly remind him that I'm banging his sister.
