Escape to the Movies: Dark Shadows

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Screamarie

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I'm going to go see this movie and I'm damn sure I'm gonna like, if not love it. Call me easily pleased but when Burton and Depp get together, I'm happy. Yes, maybe they don't make amazing epics as much as they may have in the past but...fuck they always turn out a good movie which is a lot more than I can say for Michael Bay or M. Night Shamalamadingdong.

Would I be pleased if they dug a little deeper? Certainly, but that I'm not going to let that get in the way of just enjoying myself with a fun story.
 

ChildofGallifrey

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May 26, 2008
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Casual Shinji said:
Maybe it's because I've gotten older, but I just don't buy into his quirky gothic shtick anymore. Now Burton just seem to be going through the motions without any attempt at showing some new and interesting visuals, which is what was always a big selling point for his movies.

Blond Eva Green looks like fucking stone cold fox however.
Agreed (on both points). In the 90's Burton was bold and unique, but after all these years it's actually starting to feel a little tired. Also, Burton isn't terribly adept at directing his actors. He does fine because he generally has talented people all over his work. Johnny Depp is great in the right hands, but he hasn't turned out a really great performance since Public Enemies, and hasn't excelled at Burton's hand since Corpse Bride, which probably barely counts.

I'm passing on this. I'm admittedly biased, one of my acting teachers produced the original series and he's not particularly enthralled with this production. We have very similar taste in films, so if he doesn't enjoy it odds are I won't either.

I'm just going to sit back and continue hoping that Burton will magically transform himself back into the mad genius he appeared to be in the 90's.
 

Richard Norley

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Jan 22, 2010
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I am completely appalled that Bob would show a picture of Alice Cooper when mentioning pop music.

Other than that, good review as always. I will be checking Dark Shadows out when it comes to DVD.
 

Frankfurter4444

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This review was waaaaaay to charitable. I'd stop short of calling this movie bad, but it wasn't good. At all.

Not funny, lazily written, does almost nothing with the fish-out-of-water element that should have been a central part of Depp's character, not funny, the amazing visuals only enhance how poorly the setting is used and further highlight everything else wrong with the film, most of the characters are set up and then completely underused (especially Chloë Moretz) and most importantly: it isn't funny!

The whole time I watched it, I kept waiting for it to get good, and it never did. Skip it.
 

370999

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SpiderJerusalem said:
Mullahgrrl said:
Why oh why doesn't the man review Iron Sky?
Because the review could be condensed to two words? "It sucks."
Hasn't stopped Bob before. He could just fill it up with a rant about High School
 

PsychedelicDiamond

Wild at Heart and weird on top
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Jan 30, 2011
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Scrumpmonkey said:
He's a borderline bad filmmaker that has far more misses than hits.
Eh, i don't think so. His Hits:

Batman, Batman Returns (Still one of my favourite Superhero movies ever), Ed Wood, Edward Scissorhands, Sleepy Hollow, Beetlejuice, Sweeney Todd, Big Fish, Nightmare before Christmas (Even though you may argue that it's not really a Tim Burton movie) and, arguably, Mars Attacks

His misses: Planet of the apes, Charlie and the chocolate factory (which wasn't actually _that_ bad.), Alice in Wonderland.

I'm not really a Tim Burton fanboy, to me he always seemed like a less talented Terry Gilliam. But he made a lot of really good movies. Ed Wood and Batman Returns are all time favourites of mine. I'm probably still not going to see Deadly Shadows... seems pretty mediocre.
 

Mullahgrrl

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FelixG said:
Mullahgrrl said:
Why oh why doesn't the man review Iron Sky?

Has Bob become some mainstream snob?
Because they havent even set a theatrical release date for it in the united states...

http://www.ironsky.net/site/film/releasedates/

Though why the UK is getting it sometime this month and the US is still undecided confuses me.
Why doesn't he just download it and review it then? This isn't the 50's, you know.
 

evilneko

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Jun 16, 2011
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Mullahgrrl said:
FelixG said:
Mullahgrrl said:
Why oh why doesn't the man review Iron Sky?

Has Bob become some mainstream snob?
Because they havent even set a theatrical release date for it in the united states...

http://www.ironsky.net/site/film/releasedates/

Though why the UK is getting it sometime this month and the US is still undecided confuses me.
Why doesn't he just download it and review it then? This isn't the 50's, you know.
You're asking MovieBob to pirate a movie to review for his job?

Don't hold your breath.
 

Mullahgrrl

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evilneko said:
Mullahgrrl said:
FelixG said:
Mullahgrrl said:
Why oh why doesn't the man review Iron Sky?

Has Bob become some mainstream snob?
Because they havent even set a theatrical release date for it in the united states...

http://www.ironsky.net/site/film/releasedates/

Though why the UK is getting it sometime this month and the US is still undecided confuses me.
Why doesn't he just download it and review it then? This isn't the 50's, you know.
You're asking MovieBob to pirate a movie to review for his job?

Don't hold your breath.
Well, excuse me for thinking he was a dedicated movie lover.
 

ImSkeletor

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Feb 6, 2010
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Mullahgrrl said:
evilneko said:
Mullahgrrl said:
FelixG said:
Mullahgrrl said:
Why oh why doesn't the man review Iron Sky?

Has Bob become some mainstream snob?
Because they havent even set a theatrical release date for it in the united states...

http://www.ironsky.net/site/film/releasedates/

Though why the UK is getting it sometime this month and the US is still undecided confuses me.
Why doesn't he just download it and review it then? This isn't the 50's, you know.
You're asking MovieBob to pirate a movie to review for his job?

Don't hold your breath.
Well, excuse me for thinking he was a dedicated movie lover.
A dedicated movie lover doesn't pirate movies.
 

bificommander

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Apr 19, 2010
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That was a more positive review than I was expecting, based on the trailer I sat through during The Avengers and Pirates. It looked terrible. Oh well, will still be giving this a miss I think, it just isn't my style, but interesting to hear it has some redeeming qualities.
 

likalaruku

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Nov 29, 2008
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Not even going to acknowledge the 90s revival series? It was pretty good.

Well, this is the closest thing to a positive review I've heard on this movie.

One reviewer said it reminded him more of Blackula than Dark Shadows, Jesuotaku said that it was not only the worst film Tim Burton ever directed, but the worst acting she'd ever seen from Depp. The Cinema Snob said no one in the movie appeared to be acting in the same movie as Johnny Depp & that the film would have worked better if it only claimed to be inspired by DS & was a softcore porn. The ones that did like it said that the comedy still failed. A couple of podcasts claimed that the trailer alone reportedly "broke the hearts" of 30-40 somethings who grew up with the show.

I ask myself, do I want to see this?
*Do I, a Burton fan, want to see his directing at it's worst? No.
*Do I want to see Johnny Depp in unflattering clown makeup or having sex with a woman? God no. (I'm a fujoshi, I can't help it if Het grosses me out).
*Do I want to hear 70s music? Hell no.
*Can I remember that last time I laughed at a modern American comedy? The 90s.
*Do I want to see an unfaithful adaptation of something I enjoyed as a kid? Of course not.
 

PrototypeC

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Personally, I can't stand Tim Burton ever since I watched Charlie and The Chocolate Factory remake with some friends expecting a good movie. It. Was. AWFUL, and I have looked at the man with a baleful eye ever since. If I hadn't been surrounded by people whose group I hadn't yet become a part of, I would have been yelling at the screen. "You decided that Willy Wonka has daddy issues? Seriously, again?! STOP MAKING EVERY CHARACTER YOURSELF, YOU HACK"

More recently, I would say that Corpse Bride was alright but would have been way better if it hadn't been treading old ground and Vincent wasn't a cringe-worthy-ly useless main character. Big Fish, on the other hand, was probably his only moderately recent movie I was impressed by. I didn't even known it was him until I looked it up. Sure it wasn't covered in stripes, but the central plot was still "daddy issues" and it took me a while to make that connection. Even then I can't bring myself to dislike that movie, it was just genuinely sweet and charming.

Sweeney Todd was... ehh... nothing wrong with it. If there had to be a Sweeney Todd movie then I would say that Tim Burton was indeed the man for the job. If it seemed formulaic to me, well, that's because of my close connection and understanding of both Burton and Sweeney Todd, and for a newcomer it was probably better. Then here comes Alice in Wonderland, sweeping the "stomping childhood flat", "retreading old theme" and "movie that shouldn't exist" awards, reminding me why I hated Charlie. Once again tossing around Helena Bonham Carter and Johnny Depp because they're his two favourite people on earth and not because they'd really suit the role. Helena Bonham Carter, for instance, I can't think of a movie she's EVER been right for or good in in my eyes. I just never liked her as much as Burton seems to.

I won't say that we need to get rid of him, because for all his sins the man is still the only one doing what he does. He has a preferred gothic theme that most filmmakers aren't interested in, and that alone makes him special. I don't know if he has that unique "spark" he did before, especially as he seems to think he's the greatest thing ever and immune to criticism these days. We just need to wait for more of his initial fanbase to grow up and start directing, writing and producing their own unique movies, using Burton's best and most creative as an aspiration.
 

PrototypeC

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Uhh... I don't know where all of that came from. I just started that first paragraph to weigh in, and then I dumped a whole review of Tim Burton's career on everyone without ever being asked for my opinion. Anyway...

What I was going to ask was, have you all seen the Frankenweenie trailer? I'm very confused by it. Is it the original short in 3D (maybe alongside something else), or is Tim Burton actually remaking his childhood story into a full-length feature? If so, I can't imagine why he'd do that except because he can.

Would people still go to see something like that?