Escape to the Movies: Gamer

[The Big Eye]

As far as crappy-knockoff-movies-of-crappy-knockoff-video-games are concerned, I think a passing mention of Hitman wouldn't've have hurt; that one pretty much epitomizes this whole syndrome: take a good movie, make a middling videogame, and turn it into a truly awful film adaptation. They won't be able to make good movies based on video games until video games start having good, not-stolen storylines.
Meh, I still think a Halo movie could be good. I'm eager to be proven wrong, though, if it means they finally make the damn thing.

 

[Palindromemordnilap_v1legacy]

You spelt parallel wrong. Sorry, just felt I had to nitpick about something.

I do wonder if Gerard "That guy from 300" Butler will ever be able to shake off what that film did...

 

[Rigs83]

I thought The Hitman movie was pretty good. It lacked killing people with a poison filled syringe while dressed as a giant chicken scene but otherwise they did a decent job.

 

[The Great JT]

Gotta say, I liked the concept of Gamer, but at least it's not one of those stupid games with an anti-gamer message or one of those god-awful hellspawn movie tie-in of a video game like the Mortal Kombat movies or Street Fighter.

This coming from a guy who enjoyed the Super Mario Bros. movie.


EDIT: TYLER PERRY MUST DIE!!

 

[Tharticus]

Hm. Gamer has a good concept but pretty much filled with action scenes.

Personally, I like Grandma's Boy.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Sorority Row next week Bob?

As for the movie...I really want to believe you...but Michael C Hall? How can Dexter be all bad?

 

[TwistedEllipses]

I was kinda hoping Michael C.Hall would save this film with his awesome acting...

 

[Archemetis]

Ok, deviating from the point some-what, but am I the only one who thinks it'd be totally worth paying money to see Will Smith play Link in a Legend of Zelda movie?

(Of course I'm also one of those guys that saw the "joe loves crappy movies" comic about Captain America and seriously thinks that Will Smith would also be hilarious in that role too.)

disclaimer: Not real movies mind, maybe just joke movies, like Snakes on a Plane.

 

[MovieBob]

...And you haven't reviewed "Ponyo" yet because...?

Because time and space are finite, basically

All kidding aside, I did really like "Ponyo." Miyazaki is always in rare form when he's on the "movie that probably makes more sense to a six-year-old" kick; though I do think that the attempt to hold to the rough narrative-structure of Andersen's "Little Mermaid" stifles him a bit in the third act. I will say that the "ocean storm" sequence is easily an instant career-highlight for him, and that Ponyo herself is just about the most 'real' seeming child character - animated or otherwise - I can remember seeing recently. On the technical side, the fact that the characters, especially Ponyo when she's a "fish," seem to have so much physical WEIGHT to them is really startling in hand-drawn animation - the amount of patience that must go into that blows my mind.

I should preface by saying I saw the English version, and would offer in that specific regard only that Liam Neeson was either miscast or not properly-appraised of his character prior to recording, and his distinctive brogue calls undue attention to the english-speaking-actors-casually-pronouncing-Japanese-nouns issue that isn't as much of a problem for everyone else.

 

[Gulandro]

MovieBob: Watch movie AVALON from year 2001 and from director Oshii. Truth will be there...

 

[thevegetarianzombie]

nuts... I was hoping this would be good.

 

[Jman1236]

Yeah...I saw that this was going to suck from a mile away. I knew that it was going to blow when I first saw the trailer in theaters months ago. Great review as always bob.

Oh and as for a good video game to movie idea Hollywood, what part of "Sonic Satam: The Movie" don't you understand, watch the DVD box set, it writes itself. Heck hire Ben Hurst to write the screenplay and get the cast of the show on board.

 

[Linksworld12]

whos was the first "Link" that he showed?

 

[Disthron]

Like some other people above I was pretty sure this was going to suck as well. Also, about some of your bad video game movie examples. I think with a lot of the first ones one of the big troubles was that there was esentially no story to tell. Take Double Dragon for instance. A girl get's punched in the gut and carted off and two guys go after the bad guys. Not a hole lot there. Then theres Street Fighter, the plot of any given charecter can be summed up in a singe paragraph, it's also compleatly superfluas to the game....and why couldn't bloodrayn just be set in world war 2 like it's suposed to!?

Anyway, good review, I probably will end up seeing it with one of my friends though. Also, I thought Jorard Buttler was pretty good in The Ugly Truth. XD

 

[Swaki]

not at all surprised to hear that "gamers" sucks, and im suprised when the bread pops up from the toaster.

also, horrible joke ahead

Spoiler

gamer? more like noob! BADUMDUM TSH!

 

[MovieBob]

Like some other people above I was pretty sure this was going to suck as well. Also, about some of your bad video game movie examples. I think with a lot of the first ones one of the big troubles was that there was esentially no story to tell. Take Double Dragon for instance. A girl get's punched in the gut and carted off and two guys go after the bad guys. Not a hole lot there. Then theres Street Fighter, the plot of any given charecter can be summed up in a singe paragraph, it's also compleatly superfluas to the game....and why couldn't bloodrayn just be set in world war 2 like it's suposed to!?

Anyway, good review, I probably will end up seeing it with one of my friends though. XD

"Double Dragon," like almost every arcade-brawler that came before or after, is at least partially inspired by "The Warriors," which gets an entire feature film out of the following premise: "One street gang has to fight they're way on foot from one end of New York to the other versus every other gang in every other territory." If someone made THAT into a successful feature, there's no excuse for "Double Dragon" to screw the pooch almost two decades later.

As to Street Fighter... most tournament-fighting games descend from tournament kung-fu movies like "Master of the Flying Guillotine" or "Enter the Dragon." To my mind, this has always been one of the most perfect action-movie formulas: You have a central location - the tournament - an excuse to have lots of diverse characters come together without plot contrivances and you NEVER have to come up with a dopey excuse to have an action scene: just "bang the gong" and "it's time for X to fight Y!" All the structure and plotting issues are taken care of in a few strokes by the premise, leaving you with plenty of room to get into characters and intrigue. Even VAN DAMME made a few decent movies in this vein.

 

[ObnoxiousPotatoe]

You spelt parallel wrong. Sorry, just felt I had to nitpick about something.

I do wonder if Gerard "That guy from 300" Butler will ever be able to shake off what that film did...

Not as long as the internet exists

 

[Sovvolf]

I'le probably watch this, looks dumb and stupid (Same thing) but it also looks like Popcorn movie, it's not going to be a shawshank movie or as engaging as Saving Private Ryan but with a shit load of food, a good amount of beer and a room full of friends who actively play video games, I can imagine this is going to be one of those movies .

Also thinking about the review and the premise of the film this almost sounds like Condemned(Not the deeply atmospheric balls on wall, head hide up arse game but the shitty Steve Austin movie) granted this movie seems a little more action packed.