Escape to the Movies: The Expendables

[notyouraveragejoe]

Okay....now I want to see it to see its crappyness. Although he's right...it looks like absolutely shit. Like total utter trash! I mean it seems like its just there to make money and nothing else.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

Well I thought it was fun.

Guess I'm a knuckle head.

Best get back to studying for my degree then.


My point here is that I think it was a stupid idea insulting people who went to see this film, when most of the people who will watch this have already seen it.

Anyways...

I thought it was fun. I went to see Scott Pilgrim too, and that was fun. Sure, SP was smarter and gemerally better, but The Expendables was just lots of shooty-shooty-bang-bang. That's exactly what I expected it to be. A trashy shoot 'em up with an awesome cast, reminding me of how much I loved all the old trasy shoot 'em ups that that awesome cast made. I don't want more, but it was a nice reminder. SP, to non-nerd eyes isn't particularly appealing, but everyone with a Y chromosone likes to see explosions. SP was never, ever going to contend commercially, and if you thought it would you're deluded.

 

[ZeroMachine]

I've never been a fan of old-school action films. After all, I'm a child of the 90's, and I grew up with Terminator 2: an action movie that actually meant something and made you think. This translated into films like The Matrix, The Borne films, and the Dark Knight. The closest I could go to a dumb action film was a now forgotten Denzel Washington film called Man on Fire, and it's worth it to see a former CIA assassin who's gazed into the abyss rip into the cartel. I love the 90's because it was a transition period: from the machisimo of the 80's to the engaging and relative intellectualism in today's pop culture.

Let's face it: there's more 80's nostalgics and douchebags out there then fans of comics, anime, and games. If the past decade was the age of the geek, the current decade is a reemergence of the age of the jock. The 80's were dark times for us geeks because this was a time when the nation actively celebrated brawn over brain. The Expendables is just a symptom of the larger problem: the jocks are getting skittish and feeling threatened by the geeks who've dominated pop culture for the past 20 years and they now want to take it back by force. And it's not just pop culture: it's politics as well.

Fellow geeks: we're on the advent of a second age of the jock. This doesn't have to be a bad thing: every decade has an ebb and flow between the two, but this age looks like a particularly aggressive one at that. Enjoy the relative social acceptance while it lasts, because it won't be long 'till our geek hobbies (anime, video games, comics, etc.) will be pushed back into the dark as socially inept hobbies while athleticism and other such activities will be celebrated.

... What country... scratch that... world do you live in?

"Jock" politics? What the fuck is your definition of "jock"? Please, do tell.

 

[Mumorpuger]

I have a feeling I'm in the minority when I say I didn't enjoy Scott Pilgrim. I went in expecting the source material and style would be enough to support it through the fact that it was another effing Michael Cera movie where he plays *gasp!* an awkward teenager. It wasn't.

Truly though, I felt that the other cast members played their roles well, but overall it didn't strike a chord with me.

 

[Epictank of Wintown]

Well. I have lost almost every respect I had for you Bob. The action in this movie was absolutely great. I have numerous times agreed with you (never really on any action, as you rarely discuss it), but this was so f**king opposite of what I thought that it's absolutely f**king ridiculous. There were plenty of memorable kills in the movie.

How about how Stallone used a pistol as a f**king machine gun? (he seriously shot fast and reloaded fast. Absolutely a cool feature).

Most of the action was well executed as well. I would really like to sit down with you and watch it and point out some awesome scenes.

F**k this. I feel so disappointed. Sh*t...

I will not stop watching your reviews as they are always worth watching, but God f**king damn I have never disagreed so much with you before, and I get the sense that you have absolutely no feel whatsoever for action.

How was it great? Every cliché was boringly predictable; Ex team mate turns on them, check. Female informant is daughter of corrupt leader, check. And what the hell is with punching Steve Austin WHILE HE'S ON FIRE? Talk about redundant. It has no story, no plot, no reason to get involved or care. All this film had was a cast filled with testosterone fuelled alpha males, and that doesn't make a movie "great". All that did was make the fight scenes confusing to follow as you're watching kung-fu, wrestling, knife fighting, and military hand-to-hand all at the same time.
"The Expendables" was banking on its cast to cash in, and f**k it did because of individuals like you who probably get bored if they go five minutes without gunshots. Go back to shooting squirrels, you redneck.

Boy, you sure did drink a rather big jug of condescending this morning!

You know what? There's nothing wrong with a movie being cliche. There's nothing wrong with there being little to not plot, with it being senseless, with there being nothing in the movie but big stars and supernova sized explosions.

You know why? Do you?

Because it can be, and here's the big thing so make sure your big boy pants are on:

FUN.

You know what's gonna blow your mind? Most people like FUN. Not every movie has to have art leaking out of its pores to be a fun movie.

Want to know what else is gonna blow your mind? I'll probably see both The Expendables AND Scott Pilgrim vs The World.

GASP! WHAT A THOUGHT.

 

[JayDig]

What the fuck are you talking about?

You do realize that the majority of the people that like 80s action films are nerds?

Of course not. You are in that mindset that nerds only like sci-fi and obscurity, and anything that doesn't feature video game references or pseudo-science talk isn't meant for us.

Prove it. Last time I checked, the majority of nerds like sci-fi and most others like straight-up action films.

At least we have Inception as a hallmark: but then again, it's from a well-known director who's cut his teeth in action. Something as obscure as Pilgrim is bound to go on the wayside.

I'm born 1984 and pretty much a geek. I spent a lot of time reading Spiderman comics and fifties sci-fi novels when I was a kid. I also spent a lot of time watching action movies.

I don't think action, scifi or horror are necessarily nerd or jock genres, but they're definately GUY genres as they generally involve violence. And if video games are any indication, geeks like violence a lot... more than romantic comedies anyway.

 

[Dak_N_Jaxter]

Wow. Really. Disappointment.
Oh well.
At least I have the DVD of the greatest Christmas movie of all time.
*Puts in Die Hard*
Ahhhh.... make me laugh John McLane

 

[JourneyThroughHell]

snip

After that "redneck" comment about the guy, the only thing I can do is congratulate you.
Thanks for disrupting the debates people have here with your hate-filled nonsense.

 

[Manicotti]

When was the last time you saw a big budget film without an A-Lister or nothing but A-listers to draw in audiences. would Inception have just as well with an unknown in the lead instead of Dicaprio. A-listers get the roles because they can guarantee box office receipts.

Actually, yes, I think Inception would have done equally as well without DiCaprio. There are many, many good movies that use a relatively unknown lead star without giving up its integrity or its revenue.

I went to see the Expendables because I don't give a damn if they make a movie catering to geek and game culture because I don't give a damn about geek and game culture. Hell, most videoegames revolve around guys with biceps bigger than their heads [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/624-Resident-Evil-5] shooting impoverished minorities while things blow up so Expendables is more like a game world than Scott Pilgrim.

...really? That is a massive pile of bullshit trying to pass itself off as a logical comparison, without even being relevant in the first place.

You watch Expendables because you don't go to the movies every week but you want to kill two hours enjoying AC and popcorn and not need a notepad to know what the hell is going on or watch actors you don't like act with imaginary objects that will be put in during post work.

Ok, so it has the "fun" factor of blowing shit up. There's nothing *wrong* with that or with preferring that over more cerebral films. But what else? Does it have actors who can actually portray a character? Does it have action sequences that do anything OTHER than try to pass themselves off as crap references to movies from 30 years ago? If it's not going to bother even trying to do something new with its resources, even graphically, then there's no reason at all not to treat it like any other crap movie like Cop Out or Twilight.

 

[wooty]

I thought it was ok, nothing to write home and scream about, but twas a good way to pass a boring thursday night with a few mates after the pub.

I'm on the fence about Bobs reviews and yay or nays personally, I didnt feel like seeing District 9, but he said to go see it and I'm thankful I did. But he also recommended Kick Ass too.....which very nearly put me to sleep.

 

[standokan]

Thank you MovieBob for putting the expendebles where they belong, six feet under the ground.

 

[IronStorm9]

He's not insulting the people who like the movie.

Yes he is! Actually, it's worse. He's insulting people who like the movie's premise.

And even then, how the hell does saying that Stallone is cashing in on this film makes sense? Stallone is one of the most respectable directors out there, he's the last person to do a movie simply for a cash-in

But that's just what the movie was. It had no substance, you could switch the actors in and out and no one could tell the difference, and two of the best 80s movies actors (Willis and Schwarzenegger) only get cameos. I saw an interview with Stallone on TV and he said he only picked them because he thought they were pathetically imitating him and he made several comments along the lines of "They're over the hill".

 

[Outright Villainy]

I could barely finish watching this review. Took a lot of strength.

I can't believe Bob this week. We are obedient sheep because we go see one of the biggest collaboration films this decade instead of watching a film that was barely advertised in many places? We are the worst kind of people on earth because we like the premise that a movie will be an homage to 80s action films?

He dropped the ball on this review. Insulting a film is one thing, insulting someone for liking it is another, but insulting people for thinking the premise sounds like a fun idea?. That's a new low. I won't even go into how much I disagree with you on the quality of the film.

For someone who tries to hinder people from being elitist nerds, you are one of the biggest elitist nerds I've seen in quite a while.

I agree completely. To me the movie looks like a big ol' piece of crap, but it's incredibly elitist to look down on others for liking it.

 

[titaniumChampion]

I don't recall Bob saying anything this brutally offensive about the crowd that loves Twilight. I think he's just personally butt-hurt that Pilgrim didn't fair so well at the box-office.

If you want to be taken seriously as a reviewer, don't insult the audience. You're not a social commentator, you're a movie reviewer so act like one. Review the movies and give evidence why this film doesn't deserve recognition, praise, or people's money.

You're entitled to your own opinion and interpretation of this movie, as is everyone else in the world. But to blindly cast aspersions upon the audience, should carry some consequences.

 

[wildcard9]

...All right...all right...I apologize. What I said was dumb and I didn't think halfway thru it. Then again, who does when the post on a forum?

Besides, nothing says "controversy" and brings out the worst in people like a good-old-fashioned "Us vs. them" conflict. I should've known better than to get involved in this petty thing and for that I apologize. Maybe it's a generational thing, I don't know. But there's a huge gap right here and most people are content making it wider instead of trying to build a Goddamn bridge.

It's not like I have anything against action movies or anyone else: it's the fact how something derivative can make such a success in the face of something better and more original. Bob's the same way. We play to our biases plain and simple, and at least I can be willing to admit it.

Something tells me this flame war is gonna keep going for a while know: this is gonna be bigger than his Halo Legends review. Way to go, Bob.

 

[Uber Waddles]

Movie Bob, kudos. It needed to be said. I dont care what any of the other people have here have to say, this movie was tailored to the mouth-breathers who make up the movie going crowd; ya know, the ones that enjoyed the most recent "Fast and Furious".

Cinema is better off without this movie, and I see why Movie Bob gave it a scathing review. The characters were just bad. The plot was just bad. The action was mediocre at best. The only reason is sold is because of the list of actors it boasts.

I honestly believe people only liked this movie because:

A. They have a horrible taste in movies. Some might see this as an opinion, but there wrong.

or

B. They liked the movie because of how saturated it was with action stars, which gave them a flash of nestalgia and "omg this is badass Jet Li + Stalone manly <3"

Cinema has many purposes. It is there to entertain us: movies like The A Team do this. They incorperate decent action, and the characters personalities and actors just make it work. Its there to bring a message: District 9 had aliens exploding into puddles AND had a message. Movies can teach us about life and emotions: Scott Pilgrim analyzed relationships fairly deeply, and was extremely entertaining. It could have been done better, but it was vastly superior to this drivel. The Expendables failed to entertain; it had no "OH SHIT" moments, and bland action. It had no meaning, it was a bunch of retired action starts getting sweaty. It didnt teach us important life lessons. It only existed for nestalgia. And thats it. And it wasnt that good.

MovieBob, I agree 100% with your review.

 

[KingPiccolOwned]

Huh... I thought it would be better, may rent it just to be safe, after all I do kinda hate the whole "coreography" (read as wire-fu) fad that has been sweeping action films of late. Well okay I'll be fair, I dislike "wire-fu" when the context for it doesn't make sense. Like the Matrix can get away with it because it's a computer simulation (read as The Musroom Kingdom Laws of Physics) however when Hero did it I hated it... a lot.

But still one question, what the hell's so bad about Ted Nugent, I like his music a whole lot. No I don't really know much about him as a person, but he did fire a heavy machine gun in a combat zone, which to me spells King of Awesome... But then again I wish I lived in the Imperium, and was an inquisitor, so.

 

[Gigaguy64]

Wow Bob......just wow.

This was hard to sit through.
It wasn't the most artistic thing in the world.
So what.

It had some bad Acting.
So what.

It wasn't Scott Pilgrim.
So Fucking what.

It was an excellent action movie with a decent premise that is enjoyable to many people, especially those who like Gore Heavy Action Films.
And this movie DID have a nice amount of Gore.

Body parts being blown off by Auto Shot Guns?
Knives to almost every part of the body?
Body parts being sliced off with Bowie Knives?
Kaboom?
It had it all AND a nice simple story with a surprisingly moving look at Mercenarys.

Im disappointed MovieBob.
Very Disappointed.
And since when did i become a sheep for wanting to see something i though was interesting?
Your insults were way out of line.

EDIT:And we get it, you don't like Hunters and Rednecks.
Grow up.

 

[Canadian Briton]

hey Im not a sheep, I didn't see this movie! Also why do the 8 extra reasons make DOA movie better? Seriously please stop putting reminders that you appreciate womens' bodies. We get it, you are heterosexual.