Facepalm Moments

[EternalFacepalm]

"Why don't you go to church?"
"Because I'm not religious."
"But many non-religious people go to church to!"
"...Why?"
"Because they want to be salvaged by GOD, OF COURSE!"
...Yeah.

Edit: Ten minutes later, they asked me what that "Athiest-thingy" was, I explained what it was and they said that's what they were.
...
...
WHAT?

 

[SckizoBoy]

Bear in mind I'm English (and back in primary school... which was in London):

Teacher: Where's London? (gestures at blank template of the British Isles)
Student 1: (goes up to the front) *points at where Edinburgh would be*
Me: *blink* *blink*
Teacher: Nice try, but not quite. Who else?
Student 2: *points at where Liverpool would be*
Me: *blink* *blink* *sob*
Student 3: *points at where Cardiff would be*
Me: *wham* (that's headdesk to the rest of you)
Jonny (the kid who sat next to me): Why am I in the same class as these idiots?

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

"Why don't you go to church?"
"Because I'm not religious."
"But many non-religious people go to church to!"
"...Why?"
"Because they want to be salvaged by GOD, OF COURSE!"
...Yeah.

My mum's vicar to my atheist dad: 'There are no sinners in my church.'
my dad: Isn't that like taking your car to the garage when it doesn't need fixed.
my mum: *MORTIFIED*

lol

 

[Flamezdudes]

"I'm not a Catholic, I'm a Christian."

No matter how many times I remind her that Catholicism is a sect of Christianity, she still doesn't get the idea.

Oh jeez, that pisses me off so much when people don't know that stuff.. I can't beleive how dumb people can be in my school and its a Catholic school too, you think they would know this crap...

 

[Thyunda]

"I'm not a Catholic, I'm a Christian."

No matter how many times I remind her that Catholicism is a sect of Christianity, she still doesn't get the idea.

Oh jeez, that pisses me off so much when people don't know that stuff.. I can't beleive how dumb people can be in my school and its a Catholic school too, you think they would know this crap...

In my case, it's an example of why you should not be brought up anywhere near religion. It promotes single-mindedness, which is a pain in the ass to deal with. If you grow up in a pro-Church of England environment, you'll have an inexplicable hatred of the Pope. If you're mainly Catholic, you'll refer to Protestants as 'dirty orange bastards' and you yourself won't even know why.

Fortunately, she hates confrontation, so we don't spend much time arguing over it. I'll correct her, she'll 'correct' me, so I'll explain the entire history of Christianity, and she'll say 'whatever' and drift off. This happens multiple times.

 

[Flamezdudes]

"I'm not a Catholic, I'm a Christian."

No matter how many times I remind her that Catholicism is a sect of Christianity, she still doesn't get the idea.

Oh jeez, that pisses me off so much when people don't know that stuff.. I can't beleive how dumb people can be in my school and its a Catholic school too, you think they would know this crap...

In my case, it's an example of why you should not be brought up anywhere near religion. It promotes single-mindedness, which is a pain in the ass to deal with. If you grow up in a pro-Church of England environment, you'll have an inexplicable hatred of the Pope. If you're mainly Catholic, you'll refer to Protestants as 'dirty orange bastards' and you yourself won't even know why.

Fortunately, she hates confrontation, so we don't spend much time arguing over it. I'll correct her, she'll 'correct' me, so I'll explain the entire history of Christianity, and she'll say 'whatever' and drift off. This happens multiple times.

My RE teacher had to specifically explain and make a tree diagram in class to explain it all to these idiots and even then lessons later I still heard someone still say it, they just don't get it at all.

 

[holy_secret]

"Yeah I'm from Sweden"
"Dude that's awesome! What part of France is Sweden in?"
"uhm?whaaat?"
"And dude, you totally don't look Swedish more like Mexican sup with that?"

Yes? Because all know we swedes are frog eating stripe wearing poofs. And of course the American thinks that Mexico is the only Hispanic country in this world. Not to forget that I am a halv breed
Jesus Christ I facepalmed so hard I broke my nose.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is my one and only real life experience with Americans.

 

[Lilani]

"I'm not a Catholic, I'm a Christian."

No matter how many times I remind her that Catholicism is a sect of Christianity, she still doesn't get the idea.

Oh jeez, that pisses me off so much when people don't know that stuff.. I can't beleive how dumb people can be in my school and its a Catholic school too, you think they would know this crap...

No, you two are actually wrong on this one. I am also a Christian, but not a Catholic. Specifically, I'm a Methodist.

See, Christianity simply requires that you believe Jesus Christ is your savior. It is the largest group of all of those sects. Catholics, Methodists, Protestants, Pentecostals, Baptists...those are all Christians. But only one in that list is Catholic.

Think about it this way. In geometry, a quadrilateral is simply what you call a shape that has four sides. Now, what is the first shape you think of that has four sides? A square. But is that the ONLY possible shape with four sides? Of course not.

Those are all quadrilaterals. The rectangle, the rhombus, the kite, parallelogram, trapezoid...those are all perfectly acceptable as quadrilaterals, yet only one on that image is square. And there is an infinite number of possibilities beyond simply what is listed there. The only requirement is that it has four sides. Beyond that, anything is possible. All squares are quadrilaterals, but not all quadrilaterals are squares.

Same goes for Christianity. To be a Christian, you simply have to believe in Christ as God's son. That is the primary requirement. Beyond that, it doesn't really matter that much. You could go and be Catholic if you want, but you could get most of the same results by being Baptist or Pentecostal or even non-denominational.

Just remember this: All Catholics are Christian, but not all Christians are Catholic.

 

[Thyunda]

"I'm not a Catholic, I'm a Christian."

No matter how many times I remind her that Catholicism is a sect of Christianity, she still doesn't get the idea.

Oh jeez, that pisses me off so much when people don't know that stuff.. I can't beleive how dumb people can be in my school and its a Catholic school too, you think they would know this crap...

In my case, it's an example of why you should not be brought up anywhere near religion. It promotes single-mindedness, which is a pain in the ass to deal with. If you grow up in a pro-Church of England environment, you'll have an inexplicable hatred of the Pope. If you're mainly Catholic, you'll refer to Protestants as 'dirty orange bastards' and you yourself won't even know why.

Fortunately, she hates confrontation, so we don't spend much time arguing over it. I'll correct her, she'll 'correct' me, so I'll explain the entire history of Christianity, and she'll say 'whatever' and drift off. This happens multiple times.

My RE teacher had to specifically explain and make a tree diagram in class to explain it all to these idiots and even then lessons later I still heard someone still say it, they just don't get it at all.

Hmm. I'm tempted to go on IMVU and gather up some Americans and treat them to a quiz night. Geography, of course. Maybe a bit of world history. Ah, I had a great one recently. Now, I'm slightly racist towards Spanish people. Perhaps it's because every Spaniard I've known about has existed solely to steal women.
The Spaniard who attended my college was entirely disinterested in my girlfriend while she was single, but when she was with her ex, or with me, he was following her everywhere.
And there was a group of Spaniards on TV during the royal wedding, convinced they could steal Kate Middleton. Bloody Spaniards. Anyhow, this is how it went down. I'm English, by the way. She was American.

Me: "Everytime I say something, you cry sexism!"
Her: "Hah, whatever. I'm not even crying!" (Naturally, I'm correcting her spelling and grammar)
"What, don't you understand basic English? Are you freakin' Spanish or something?"
"WHAT?! HOW DARE YOU?! I'M EUROPEAN!"
"...Spain's in Europe, sweetheart."
"I AM NOT HISPANIC! I AM BRITISH!!!!!"
"I know British, ma'am, and you are NOT British."

She left the chat. *****.

 

[Thyunda]

"I'm not a Catholic, I'm a Christian."

No matter how many times I remind her that Catholicism is a sect of Christianity, she still doesn't get the idea.

Oh jeez, that pisses me off so much when people don't know that stuff.. I can't beleive how dumb people can be in my school and its a Catholic school too, you think they would know this crap...

No, you two are actually wrong on this one. I am also a Christian, but not a Catholic. Specifically, I'm a Methodist.

See, Christianity simply requires that you believe Jesus Christ is your savior. It is the largest group of all of those sects. Catholics, Methodists, Protestants, Pentecostals, Baptists...those are all Christians. But only one in that list is Catholic.

Think about it this way. In geometry, a quadrilateral is simply what you call a shape that has four sides. Now, what is the first shape you think of that has four sides? A square. But is that the ONLY possible shape with four sides? Of course not.

Those are all quadrilaterals. The rectangle, the rhombus, the kite, parallelogram, trapezoid...those are all perfectly acceptable as quadrilaterals, yet none are squares. And there is an infinite number of possibilities beyond simply what is listed there. The only requirement is that it has four sides. Beyond that, anything is possible.

Same goes for Christianity. To be a Christian, you simply have to believe in Christ as God's son. That is the primary requirement. Beyond that, it doesn't really matter that much. You could go and be Catholic if you want, but you could get most of the same results by being Baptist or Pentecostal or even non-denominational.

Just remember this: All Catholics are Christian, but not all Christians are Catholic.

That was my argument. She was saying that being a Catholic exempts you from Christianity. So, rather than saying "I'm not Catholic, I'm Protestant", she was saying "I'm not Catholic, I'm Christian," with the same tone of voice you'd use to deny being Muslim.

 

[Flamezdudes]

"I'm not a Catholic, I'm a Christian."

No matter how many times I remind her that Catholicism is a sect of Christianity, she still doesn't get the idea.

Oh jeez, that pisses me off so much when people don't know that stuff.. I can't beleive how dumb people can be in my school and its a Catholic school too, you think they would know this crap...

No, you two are actually wrong on this one. I am also a Christian, but not a Catholic. Specifically, I'm a Methodist.

See, Christianity simply requires that you believe Jesus Christ is your savior. It is the largest group of all of those sects. Catholics, Methodists, Protestants, Pentecostals, Baptists...those are all Christians. But only one in that list is Catholic.

Think about it this way. In geometry, a quadrilateral is simply what you call a shape that has four sides. Now, what is the first shape you think of that has four sides? A square. But is that the ONLY possible shape with four sides? Of course not.

Those are all quadrilaterals. The rectangle, the rhombus, the kite, parallelogram, trapezoid...those are all perfectly acceptable as quadrilaterals, yet only one on that image is square. And there is an infinite number of possibilities beyond simply what is listed there. The only requirement is that it has four sides. Beyond that, anything is possible. All squares are quadrilaterals, but not all quadrilaterals are squares.

Same goes for Christianity. To be a Christian, you simply have to believe in Christ as God's son. That is the primary requirement. Beyond that, it doesn't really matter that much. You could go and be Catholic if you want, but you could get most of the same results by being Baptist or Pentecostal or even non-denominational.

Just remember this: All Catholics are Christian, but not all Christians are Catholic.

Thats exactly what I was saying, my class mates who were Catholic's were saying they weren't Christian when they were. They were getting it confused that Christians and Catholics were seperate whereas Catholicism is just a branch of Christianity.

 

[Lilani]

That was my argument. She was saying that being a Catholic exempts you from Christianity. So, rather than saying "I'm not Catholic, I'm Protestant", she was saying "I'm not Catholic, I'm Christian," with the same tone of voice you'd use to deny being Muslim.

Ah okay, that part of the argument wasn't clear to me. The way you laid it out, it sounded like she was trying to say...well everything I just explained there, lol. Sorry about that.

 

[R4ptur3]

my Aunt, after recently coming back from Tunisia. She's stupid so i thought i'd ask her what continent it's on, and she said 'the middle east'. WHY am i related to her. *Facepalm*

 

[Thyunda]

That was my argument. She was saying that being a Catholic exempts you from Christianity. So, rather than saying "I'm not Catholic, I'm Protestant", she was saying "I'm not Catholic, I'm Christian," with the same tone of voice you'd use to deny being Muslim.

Ah okay, that part of the argument wasn't clear to me. The way you laid it out, it sounded like she was trying to say...well everything I just explained there, lol. Sorry about that.

I feel bad now. I made you get out the geometry and everything.

 

[Lilani]

I feel bad now. I made you get out the geometry and everything.

No big deal, I'll probably have to bring it out later today, anyway. Maybe explaining to some old person or hardcore conservative that yes, I am in college but no, I am not in a sorority and do not go out drinking every single night.

 

[Shymer]

(Me) "Could you tell me what the time is?"
(Him) "What - today?"

(Her) "I don't really understand personal car number plates. They're so expensive. I mean - what would happen if you had an accident and broke it?"

 

[Vault101]

I think of the movie "Team America"

then all the poeple who enjoy it and think its being sincere (yeah I have snob moments)

or "I dont want game sot be art! then they wont be fun anymore! we'll just have "artsy" games"

 

[steeple]

"Why don't you go to church?"
"Because I'm not religious."
"But many non-religious people go to church to!"
"...Why?"
"Because they want to be salvaged by GOD, OF COURSE!"
...Yeah.

Edit: Ten minutes later, they asked me what that "Athiest-thingy" was, I explained what it was and they said that's what they were.
...
...
WHAT?

I love how this story fits with your profile nickname so well

 

[Thyunda]

I feel bad now. I made you get out the geometry and everything.

No big deal, I'll probably have to bring it out later today, anyway. Maybe explaining to some old person or hardcore conservative that yes, I am in college but no, I am not in a sorority and do not go out drinking every single night.

Not really sure how a trapezoid is going to help you with that.