Shasta is still around

Still taking care of you no doubt
because I'd like to think my own dog is looking out for me.
I got my dog Shadu when I was a year old, he was a couple of months. At the time I thought all dogs where named Shadow but I could only say Shadu. He was a boxer pit bull mix so he was huge from the start and had to sleep outside when he got older. We never really payed attention to him, something I really regret. He was a great dog, he would go on walks by himself and come back the next day sitting on the porch until we opened the door. When he was around ten he grew a tumor on his neck. We weren't well off and it didn't hinder him in anyway so we never took him to the vet.
He was fine until he turned 16. His tumor started to act up, he had arthritis and was completely senile. (We have an empty in ground pool thats 10 feet across and he tried to jump across it, he fell in but was perfectly fine since I caught him). A year passed and his tumor got even worse, it popped and we had to clean it out every five minutes if not the flies would infest it. We decided we needed to put him down but the vet scheduled us for the next day.
It was probably the worst day of my life, we had cleaned out his wound and bandaged it but the flies still got to it. I spent the whole day cleaning maggots out of his wound. I cried the whole day and begged him to forgive me. Then we took him in. I still remember him closing his eyes, his breath getting shallow how warm he still was when we took him home and how cute he looked in the shirt we dressed him up in as we put him into his grave.
He was the best dog ever and I took him for granted, I still cry when I see his pictures.